AN: Just a lil something to tide us over until the next chapter. Which will hopefully have a little bit more roy and riza in it, considering the last chapter was SEVERELY lacking in the royai department…
Riza cradled her head in her hands from exhaustion. In front of her laid Roy, "No, the Colonel" she reminded herself firmly. The events that led up to the Colonel being confined to a hospital bed played repeatedly in her head.
"I should have insisted to stay with him…" she thought. "I agreed to support him, and he entrusted his safety to me. Why did I let Havoc go with him? I've always been the better shooter…its because of me that he was injured so badly…"
"What are you thinking about?" a voice spoke feebly, his tone hoarse with exhaustion and pain. Riza jumped to her feet, so wound up that she hadn't even noticed that Roy had woken up.
"Sir, you're awake!" she exclaimed.
"Yes…somehow." Roy sighed, his hand brushing the side of his torso where Lust had pierced him. "How's Havoc?"
"I'm not sure…sir. I've been here." she admitted.
He stared intensely at her face for a few moments…and Riza knew it was coming. She held her breath slightly.
"Lieutenant…what happened to you before I entered the room? What caused you to give up like that?" the Colonel asked slowly.
Riza stared at the floor. She forced herself to speak, shamefaced.
"The homunculus Lust...told me that she killed you. I lost control. I fired every last bullet I had at her, but when she didn't die…I didn't want to try anymore." she spoke, her voice barely above a whisper.
She waited for his reaction with baited breath, not daring to raise her gaze from the floor.
"You idiot!" he shouted, fury overtaking all emotions in his voice. "You lost the will to live because of something an enemy told you? Just because of that? That's not what I expected of you, First Lieutenant Hawkeye! I thought that you would be the last person to act like that!"
The words dug the knife of guilt in her chest even deeper. "I'm very sorry, Sir…" she whispered, her eyes closed to hold back the tears she felt in them.
"You need to start thinking." he continued bluntly. "Stop acting pathetic, get your act together, and never, ever give up the will to live. Start acting like a soldier, so I can consider you my aide. I'll continue to let you protect my back for now, but you can't let this happen again!"
"Yes sir." she said, her eyes still closed.
Roy was quiet for a moment. "Riza…look at me." he said.
Riza opened her eyes, willing herself not to cry. When she met his eyes, softened with concern, she almost lost it. Almost.
"No matter what, you need to live. If anything happens to me, then it's up to you to continue what we started. To make this country great again, and fair. So there will never be an Ishbal again. Just because I'm gone, that doesn't mean that you have to be too." he said softly, his face hurt with the idea that she actually would take her life.
Riza took a deep, shuddering breath to compose herself.
"But I've lived for this for so long." she murmured, dropping heavily into the chair behind her. "I don't know anything else but supporting you, sir. You called me Riza just now, but I can't even bring myself to call you Roy because of the fear it might distract from your goals. So if you die, why shouldn't I? Everything I've lived for is dead anyways." she said between splayed fingers, her hands covering her face in shame.
"It's not my goal." he said gently. "Its our goal. It was Hughes' goal when he died. That is why you have to keep breathing. So that I too have something left to live for." Riza's breath caught in her throat. Did he mean..?
Roy's dark eyes appraised her reaction. He smiled gently.
"Even if you think that I am dead, you can never stop. Because when the day comes that I do become Fuhrer, we can push aside our goals for one moment and focus on what we want. What we both want." His gaze lingered hungrily on her plain, unadorned hand.
Riza stood up abruptly. "I look forwards to it. Excuse me sir…" she said, and rushed out of the room to hide her tears…