An Assault for Two:
Sanguine covered his face in recoil when a blinding light engulfed his surroundings the second he leapt through the transporter Jackass style. Eventually after what seemed like years, Sanguine uncovered his face to find that he was standing on top of a bright cloud.
"What is this!" Sanguine yelled,"This is a cloud right?!"
["Uhh, yeah it is…what about it?"] Hexus replied back through their telecommunication
"What about it?! What about it is that I am STANDING on a CLOUD as if it were solid ground! It's a cloud, this is defying all kinds of physics right now!"
["Well, to be fair, you are in a GAME UNIVERSE Sanguine! Now regardless of that what do you see, describe your surroundings."]
"*Sigh*…Okay, um…There's clouds all around me, uhh…I see some golden Greek Pantheons and other structures about a mile away…oh hey! there's some funny looking' flying midgets in gladiatorial armor a ways away…yeah…preeeety sure I died on the way to my destination and now I'm in Heaven…well Hexus it's been a fun journey, think I'm gonna go fi-"
["No no no! what you said is exactly the description of the place your at." Hexus quickly interrupted."Congradulations Sanguine you've successfully made it to Skyworld!"]
(Skyworld)
"Yeah, what the bold text said…" Sanguine said as he shoved the sub-text out of the way. "*SNIIIIIIIIF*…Ahhhh, smell that air, smells like…thinning oxygen, good thing I don't need air to live." Sanguine stated
["Right, well anyways Sanguine see if you can find anyone to ta-"]
"Wait Hexus shut up…you hearin' what i'm hearing?" …
["Heeeeaaring what…exactly, I'm not hearing anything?"]
"No no, I'm hearing something, it sounds like … fighting?"
["Fighting? Sanguine, you better stay away from that, for all we know it could be too dangerous to engage!"]
"Nope screw that!" Sanguine stated abruptly,"I'm going in guns blazing!" Sanguine took off flying through the air as he approached the source of the commotion.
["Sanguine! Hold on you don't know what you're getting yourself into!"] Hexus pleaded, but it was no use Sanguine ignored his friend's warning and hid himself snuggly behind a big cloud that looked like a shrub and observed.
"Weird, it looks like a giant goofy flaming skull fighting a white winged angel, he looks young too…hmm… Hey Hexus, should I kill him?" Sanguine asked with gusto
["What?! No, remember Sanguine you want to make friends and allies for our cause not enemies against us! Go help him fight it!"]
"Alright! I finally get to kill something…okay on five…1…2..oh screw it! 5- YAHHHHH!" Sanguine yelled and leapt out of cover and high into the sky grabbing the attention of both combatants.
Sanguine seemed to vanish in an instant, only to reappear behind the Clubberskull in a split second. Before the flaming powerhouse could retaliate, Sanguine threw an uppercut at the foe with enough sheer force to shatter a planet straight at the skull, sending it sailing into the sky. Also, if that wasn't enough, Sanguine quickly charged a powerful energy blast in his hands which he promptly sent soaring straight at the Clubberskull! As the shot made contact, many hearts exploded from the battered skull's torched corpse raining down from on high as they homed in on Sanguine which he absorbed in order to collect the points.
Sanguine then powered down to regain his composure."Well that heart explod-ey thingy sure is new, you don't see that every day, huh…"
"THAT WAS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING!" Sanguine turned to meet the source of the voice only to come face-to-face with a young angel who was shorter than him with the most ecstatic expression on his face that anyone would ever see.
"Wow you really saved my skin back there! That Clubberskull got the upper hand on me and I'm sure I would've been finished if you hadn't come along!" The Angel stated with relief.
"Hey man, ain't no thang." Sanguine retorted with acknowledgement. "The names Sanguine, ex-mercenary, lover, part time cook, and I think I was a soothsayer at one point in time, destroyer of sanity, whatever else you want to call me…I digress though, pleasure to make your acquaintance." Sanguine raised a brofist up to the Angel.
"I'm Pit, lead commander of Lady Palutena's army…uh, pleasure's all mine!"Pit raised his hand and shook Sanguine's fist firmly not understanding the concept of the brofist.
"Righty then,"Sanguine stated with dissatisfaction,"We're gonna have to work on that later. Anyways, what's a guy like you doing out here getting attacked by ClubberRubberChainsawWhateveryoucallits huh?" Sanguine asked
"Well, my superior, Lady Palutena, asked me to patrol the area for any leftover Underworld forces that haven't been dealt with, and while I was taking a break that Clubberskull jumped me." Pit stated back in defeat
"Hey don't get yourself down, we all get jumped every now and then, I mean just this last week I was taking this hour long piss at a urinal and this foot soldier snuck up behind me and tried shotgun blasting my wang off, but I dodged out of the way in time and blew him to hell and back with his own shotgun, then I ate like...3 Hot Pockets before I passed out drunk in my friends Cadillac…Ah, good times…that's all behind me now though." Sanguine said
Pit stared back at him in utter confusion,"What are you even going on about? What's a Hot Pocket, or a Cah-dill-lack?"
"Nothing you should worry about, just thinking out loud for most of that." Sanguine stated in reassurance.
"Well hey Sanjeen-"
"Sanguine."
"Right, Sanguine, you should come with me to meet my friends an-"
"PIT!" A female voice suddenly rang out in his head.
"Lady Palutena?!" Pit thought back, a look of concern becoming apparent on his face. "Lady Palutena what is it?!"
"Pit...enemies...Underworld...help..." Palutena's telepathy was riddled with static in Pit's mind as she seemed to struggle in her speech as she could only relay keywords.
"Lady Palutena? LADY PALUTENA!?" Pit yelled out in his mind feverishly waiting for a response from her...but none came...
"Oh no..." Pit said with great worry.
"So, your lady friend's in trouble huh?" Sanguine stated in a half concerned, half humorous attitude.
Pit looked up at Sanguine to see him looking back with his arms crossed across his chest in a manly fashion,"Wha-how did you..."
Sanguine put a finger against his head in a smartass manner," I'm also capable of telepathic manipulation, I can hear your conversations loud as day.
"Oh, uh...cool I guess,"Pit replied in a nervous manner looking down
"Hey, relax Pit,"Sanguine reassured,"I'm not gonna hound you for your thoughts, your conversations are your business, I'll leave it there."
"Oh thank goodness,"Pit breathed a sigh of relief."But right now that's of least importance! It is my duty as the captain of Lady Palutena's guard to save her from any danger she faces, no matter the threat!" Pit stated with firm confidence."Sanguine!"
"Yo."
"Are you up to the task of helping me purge the evil forces of the Underworld that threaten my people and Lady Palutena!"
"Quick question...does your place have steak, mutton or any other kind of meat?..."
"Uh, yeah...we have a kitchen full of food."
"WELL HOT DAMN! YOU CAN COUNT ME IN OL' PITTY OL' PAL, you and me man, we will conquer the WORLD and anyone who apposes our might will be crushed with a pile of acid coated BRICKS!"
"Woah, hey now, calm yourself Sanguine, we won't quite do that..." Pit stated nervously.
"Ahem ... sorry about that I got a bit carried away there." Sanguine apologized and regained his calmness. "Now about saving your lady friend..."
"Right, we've been talking for too long, we must save Lady Palutena right away!" Pit charged forward on his cloud and leapt up into the air...only to fall flat on his face in quite the humorous manner.
"Alright Pit, now's not the best time to play dumbass, we should go now, for real." Sanguine stated while smiling
Pit slowly dragged himself up from the ground while rubbing the back of his head,"Ow, it's no good, with Lady Palutena in danger she can't help me activate the power of flight!"
"Well why didn't you say so!" Sanguine stated in an affirmative manner,"I can fly without assistance, grab on Pit."
"Attention all passengers this is your captain speaking, we're looking at a short flight today, winds seem to be in the low regions, please fasten your seatbelts at the indicati-"
"SANGUINE WE'RE LOSING PRECIOUS TIME!" Pit yelled in annoyance
"Okay! Fine! I was just trying to lighten the mood...aaaand we're off!
Sanguine wrapped his arm around Pit's waist and the two took off to the skies.
["Hello...hello! Sanguine! Are you there?!"]
"Hey Hexus! What's up buddy, glad to see you're still kickin'!"
["What's up buddy?! Are you mentally insane Sanguine?!"] Hexus yelled back, his voice loud enough for the telecommunication to be heard by both Pit and Sanguine.
"Was it something I said Hexus? You're not usually this pissed..." Sanguine responded sheepishly
["Why don't you take a guess dude! You cut off communication with me before leaping straight into the face of danger, for all I know you could've been dead!"]
"Okay mom, calm down, first of all, this is MY story! I'll do whatever the hell I feel is necessary, and two I was busy conversing with my new buddy Pit, Pit meet Hexus, Hexus, Pit.
"Hello Hexus,"Pit said,"I'm sure your his friend...or something?"
["His angry friend, yes, also his go-to guy for info on others, and his eyes and ears in the sky, I can also see through his eyes and hear through his ears, sounds creepy I know, but It's necessary for proper communication, other than that, well met Pit."]
"Okay guys, we're heeeeere!" Sanguine exclaimed as he touched down on Palutena's Temple And let go of Pit.
(Palutena's Temple)
As they both looked around, with Hexus peering through Sanguine's eyes, they noticed the destruction strewn around the place
"Who or what could have done something like this?" Pit said in disbelief, a look of remorse crossing his face.
"I have no idea, but whoever did it must really hate you..." Sanguine replied
Hexus spoke to both of the heroes after a long silence, ["Guys, I've seen attacks like this before, this was no random assault, this attack was planned!"]
"Then who could have done this!" Pit yelled in frustration desperately seeking a rational explanation for the carnage.
Before any of the three could clue in more to the current situation, a damaged Centurion ran up to Pit noticeably out of breath,"C-commander," he stammered," They came out of the blue, in droves, a-ambushed us, a cloaked figure...leading the attack, captured Lady Palutena...
"What else do you know!?" Pit struggled for more information
"T-the remnants of the Underworld army were being l-led by a cloaked man who singlehandedly wiped out a good portion of the Centurion army before kidnapping Palutena..."
The Centurion tried to continue, but collapsed on the ground from pure exhaustion.
"Ahh, the ol' catch em' with their pants down guerrilla technique...that's like Bush League levels of cheapness," Sanguine chimed
"Sanguine!" Pit started,"We have to move out now, can you find out where Lady Palutena is being held?"
"Can do! Hexus!"
["On it, I'm pinpointing her heat signature right now … aaaannd bingo! She's in the Main Hall, just head north from your current position."]
"Got it, Pit! Let's move." Sanguine said with a leader's tude'.
"Right!" Pit replied with confidence.
Pit knocked an arrow in his bow and prepared his claws while Sanguine summoned up MANLY energy that surged through him and crackled all over his body.
["Wait Sanguine! Before you go, remember that you can manipulate your probability and luck!"]
"Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me! I'm not sure how I keep forgetting that... that really seems like something you wouldn't forget, but I do anyway…I don't know Im probably just dumb." Sanguine retorted
["Where have you been…"] Hexus stated with a stone cold demeanor
Sanguine and Pit both fought their way up to the main hall, with Pit shooting and clawing at any and all Underworld troops, and Sanguine punching, kicking, blasting enemies off of ledges and using his luck manipulation to cause enemies to trip and fall off ledges, make their weapons jam, or straight-up miss. Eventually the two warriors made their way into the main hall where, sure enough, Palutena was being held captive in a cage with a mysterious hooded figure lounging in her throne carelessly toying with an apple in his hands, with no regard for the two heroes that stood before him baring their weapons.
Pit was the first to speak up,"YOU… were you the one who did all this?!"
The figure stopped playing around with the apple, stopping dead in his tracks, he turned his head slowly to Pit in a crooked manner, his face cloaked in darkness from the shadow cast by his hood, crushing the apple altogether in one swift motion before responding.
"…Perhaps…" His voice had a threatening icy tone to it that sent a shiver up and down your spine, one that could drop a grown man to his knees in fear.
His voice caught both Pit and Palutena off guard, causing them to tense up in recoil, Pit was the first to break free of this, staring down the cloaked man as best he could.
The voice did not sway Sanguine as much as the other two, in fact, it sounded sort of familiar to him...
"Who are you, and why are you here?!" Pit demanded trying his best not to sound nervous.
The figure got up from the throne slowly, and walked down the golden staircase, meeting the two face to…well, cloaked face before speaking
"I go by many names…but you may call me…Malus, why I'm here…to conquer and destroy, but enough about me, let's kill YOU!"
Malus charged forward at the two heroes, drawing a dark and menacing sword from the sleeve of his cloak, only for it to clash with Pit's claws.
Sanguine vanished from sight and appeared overhead, coming down fast with an energy blast at the ready, Malus however, expected this and also vanished from sight.
"Oh crap…" was all Sanguine could say before his blast met contact with the floor and the ensuing collateral sent both he and Pit flying in opposite directions.
Sanguine quickly leapt up trying to find where Malus went off to. Sanguine tried to use his Telepathy to pinpoint his location, but something was disrupting his connection.
Pit was also in the midst of locating Malus as he knocked another arrow in his bow."Show yourself and face judgement for your crimes!" Pit also couldn't see where he was, but both could hear him loud and clear.
"Give up and die…you can't win, you're only wasting your time and effort, your army is dead, your leader, captured. I am the final judge of who lives and who dies, and I have chosen death for all who are living!"
Malus' voice echoed in the halls, but with no body to match it, he had seemingly disappeared, his tirade carrying through the room like a ghost.
Pit retaliated,"What you say is nothing but lies! Who do you even think you are anyways!"
"God," Malus replied with an evil, yet icy tone.
Sanguine charged another blast, dark blue energy radiating off of his palm, ready for him to jump out at anytime, when suddenly, a voice interrupted his train of thought.
["Hi Sanguine, miss me?"] Hexus said
"Hexus! Thank God, do you know where Malus is hiding? I can't track him with my telepathy, its being interrupted!" Sanguine thought
[ Two steps ahead of the game, man. The bastard's disguising his heat signature, but he made the mistake of using PSI psycho energy to disrupt yours and Palutena's telepathy!"]
"So it was him…" Sanguine thought back
[ "I'm currently tracking his telepathic waves…there! He's hiding behind the top right pillar at the farthest end of the floor!"] Hexus exclaimed
"Oh is he now?" Sanguine couldn't help crack a smile now that he knew that he got the upper hand.
["Hold on, I've been observing your battle with Malus, he'll be expecting you if you engage him directly, try and find a way to ambush him, good luck!"]
Sanguine observed his surroundings, and found a mirror close to the pillar. "Of course! The mirror!" Sanguine thought in surprise as two and two clicked.
Sanguine kicked up his luck manipulation, and then aimed his blast at the mirror, he noticed that Malus and Pit were too busy in their shouting match about the philosophical quandaries of life and death for Malus to notice Sanguine aiming for him.
"Good job Pit." Sanguine thought,"The guy involuntarily distracted him for me."
Sanguine fired the beam of pure energy directly at the mirror, causing it to reflect off the surface and hit Malus directly in the face, knocking him off the pillar mid-sentence and stunning him momentarily.
"BOOM headshot! 50 points!" Sanguine yelled in accomplishment.
Sanguine wasted no time for Malus to recuperate, and directly charged the cloaked menace head-on, giving Malus enough time to look up in astonishment as Sanguine's foot made direct contact with Malus' face, soccer punting him into the sunset far off from the temple.
"AND IT'S A HOOOOOOOOME RUN!" Sanguine yelled putting on his best announcer voice.
Sanguine turned around in time to see Pit free Palutena from her prison. The Goddess of Light descended from the cage in front of the two cloaked in heavenly light.
"Thank you for freeing me Pit," Palutena congratulated him, then turning her attention to Sanguine," And you have my deepest thanks for dealing with that menace, what was his name…Malus? Yes, thank you both for saving me!" She gave both the heroes her regards before again returning her attention to Sanguine," What is your name if I may ask?"
Sanguine readied his signature stance cracking a sly grin.
"Oh boy this again…" Pit sighed in annoyance
Sanguine simply ignored his statement and began," I am Sanguine Carbide, ex-mercenary elite, lover of women, banned from over 258 petting zoos across the multiverse, and I also kick bad guys in the face now, so that's a thing I guess…" Sanguine stated while raising a brofist
Palutena stared at the mercenary in wonderment before responding with a brofist of her own, the two fist bumped, and Sanguine turned toward Pit,"See! Palutena knows what's up!"
Palutena responded with a statement of her own,"…lover of women huh?"
"PALUTENA!" Pit yelled, his face evolving a massive blush,"You shouldn't say things like that it's embarrassing."
"pitdon'tcockblockme," Sanguine said under his breath.
"What was that?" Pit asked
"Nothing at all! Anyways, Palutena!"
"Yes, what is it?"
"I've come a long way, and fought many foes to warn you all of a threat much more lethal than Malus that endangers all of Skyworld, Angel Land, and the Underworld." Sanguine said in a serious demeanor.
"Bigger than Malus?" Palutena exclaimed with concern plastering her calm face.
"What kind of threat exactly?" Pit asked Sanguine
"Let's discuss this over dinner cause I'm freakin' starving!" Sanguine yelled as he charged off into the kitchen.
Authors Note:
Ooh, Malus and Proteus… mo' threats equal mo' problems for the others.
Don't expect future chapters to be this long, I just had a lot of time on my hands and decided that you people deserve the exciting stuff!
I feel the battle between Malus vs. Pit and Sanguine is a lot more epic with music try this one:
Position Music - Resolution: watch?v=o9DLewEUrr8
Well, see you in the next chapter hopefully our heroes will be enlightened on the true enemy! Also some more familiar characters will show themselves!
-TwoFatNinjas