"This is Zoe, we pulled her out of the helicopter about 10 minutes ago. Possible head impact with rocks, weak pulse and BP is very low." Tess shouted as a gaggle of doctors and nurses and onlookers came and surrounded the trolley on which she lay as they rushed through the hospital to get her to Resus.
Max had looked up when he'd heard the commotion. His mouth had gone dry and his vision had gone into slow motion "Zoe?" he croaked as he felt bile rise up from the pit of his stomach. "Zoe?" He asked again to no-one in particular, just longing for someone to correct him.
He could see her now, lying lifeless on the bed as Connie and the others treated her. Not for the first time he wished he had some medical knowledge… something. Anything to reassure him. She was going to be fine, she was going to be fine, she was going to be fine. He had to keep believing it. It made Max question who he was. This wasn't him. He wasn't a worrier – he got through life by flirting, being cheeky and grinning. But that wouldn't help him now. Nothing would. He'd known it was a bad idea to fall for her. But this time he couldn't help himself. It'd always been more than sex. She'd always been the most beautiful, smartest 'conquest' and he couldn't treat her like something disposable. Not this time. And now look; his carefully constructed life so brilliantly avoiding any kind of heartache was crumbling around him.
He knew he had to get on, no-one knew about the 'them', whatever THAT was, so he couldn't go and sit with her. Not yet, anyway. He regretted it now. Being childish, not talking to her, declining her offer of breakfast. If only he could go back in time, spend every moment of that time with her.
The time he had to wait for the doctors to know she was stable was agonising. His heart flipped when he saw Connie come through the swing doors "Is she…?" He asked Connie smiled sympathetically "She's in a bad way. But she'll be fine" The way Connie answered his unspoken question made him think she knew something was going on between the two of them, but he didn't have time to worry about that now. He breathed a sigh of relief and looked towards Tess as her small body squeezed out of those same doors. "Max? She's asking to see you". Tess' face remained ever professional and although Max was aware of the other staff members' confusion at Zoe's request to see him, he didn't care at that point.
"Zoe?" He questioned again as he neared the bed. "Are you OK? You gave me quite a fright". Zoe didn't reply in words, just held out a bandaged hand which Max eagerly but gingerly grabbed on to. He put his forehead close to her bruised one. He could smell her smell. Beneath the stench of hospital, smoke and grubbiness, he could smell her. Zoe. And he found a little perfection in the mess that surrounded them. "Don't leave me, Max" the whisper that came from the bed made his heart turn and his stomach churn. In one way, he was grateful for her vulnerability, that she was allowing him to look after her. In another, it hurt him to see something so beautiful, so precious so scared and alone. He squeezed her hand tighter. "I'm not going anywhere, darlin'. I'll sleep in the on-call room, I'll… Hey, I could find an empty bed and bring it in here. What do I care, you're OK and that's all that matters". A small smile tugged at the corner of Zoe's lips and she held his hand tighter in return.
A few days later, Zoe was back at home. She was glad to be in her own space again. Max had been staying with her; he'd told Robyn that he'd be staying with his girlfriend for a while, so he hadn't lied to her. He'd briefly wondered if everyone had worked out what was going on, but that wasn't important right now. His wish was coming true, he was learning about medicine, he'd been faithfully at Zoe's side whenever he heard her wince in pain and had changed her bandages morning and night. He'd been sleeping on the sofa in order to give her some space.
"Come on, then, let's get these changed" Max said, glancing down at the bandages around Zoe's hand and those on her beautiful face. As he gently unpeeled the material, he saw her face crumple in pain. "Sorry, baby" he said, wishing with everything that he could swap places with her and take the pain away. She shook her head "it's OK. Thanks for this, Max, I really appreciate it". She ruffled her hand through his hair. "What would I do without you, eh?" She asked, trying to inject a little humour into the situation.
Max could see that the wounds were starting to heal but they still filled him with guilt and sadness every time he saw them. He raised her hand to his lips and gently kissed his way around a particularly sorry looking one. Although they'd kissed since her release from hospital, Zoe had been in no fit state for any 'physical activity', so their kisses had been reduced and gentle. The intimacy of his kisses made her lean back her head and breathe deeply in the knowledge that there was a man willing to stay by her side and nurse her back to full health.
As Max was sleeping that night, he heard Zoe scream from her bed. He couldn't work out what she was screaming, but he rushed in to be with her. He found her sitting up, tears streaming down her face and her delicate hands clutching at the duvet as if it were protecting her from something. As soon as she saw him, she stretched out her hands to him, silently telling him to hold her and he did. Gladly. He pulled her in close, breathing against her ear, moving his hand in circles on her back and gently rocking her, like a baby, until the screaming and the sobbing subsided.
"What was that about?" He asked, concerned. "Oh Max, please, don't. Just stay with me". Zoe sounded weary and desperate and Max knew that she'd open up to him if and when the time was right. He nodded his head in silent agreement. Still holding on to her tightly, he slid beneath the covers with her and allowed her to manoeuvre herself so that she was comfortable with her back against his chest. He slid his arms around her waist and she quickly grabbed hold of his hands. He couldn't go back to sleep. Not now. It wasn't long until morning anyway, but he could tell her breathing had become shallow and she'd fallen asleep. "Love you, baby" he whispered into her ear. It wasn't something he'd really ever said in her waking moments. Maybe that was something that needed to change. He wasn't sure. He felt her back shuffle even closer to him, expelling any air that was between the two bodies, as if in silent confirmation of her agreement.