Okay, so this is my first fanfanfic!!!!!!! Please tell me what you think, no mincing words. I know it's not very long. The sencond chapter is even shorter. It looks so much longer on Word! Grrr... Anywho, r&r!

Forgotten Memories

Chapter 1: Behind These Hazel Eyes

Seems like just yesterday you were a part of me

I used to stand so tall, I used to be so strong

Your arms around me tight, everything felt so right

Unbreakable, like nothin' could go wrong

Now I can't sleep, no, I can't breathe

I'm barely hanging on

Here I am, once again, I'm torn into pieces

Can't deny it, can't pretend, just thought you were the one

Broken up deep inside, but you can't see the tears I cry

Behind these hazel eyes

His meadow. Our meadow. Not anymore. Now it was just my meadow, but my presence didn't make it unearthly beautiful. That was his job.

I lingered at the edge before realizing where I was standing was the precise spot where he and I…oh, stop! A single tear leaked out and snaked across my cheekbone and to the corner of my mouth. No. I wasn't going to break down. Not now, after all these months. Why did I even come here? Was I so desperate and obsessed that I would return to dig up my painful, almost forgotten memories?

Turning sharply to leave, I caught a motion in the corner if the meadow.

I knew it wasn't…him. I knew that, but, oh, did I hope all the same. The sight of another vampire was a miracle I didn't know existed. It proved I wasn't insane.

I took a haltering step toward that familiar face that yet still eluded my memory. Who was it?

The man stepped out of the shadow and threw prisms of light wherever the sunlight touched his skin. Shock flitted across his face, and I recognized him.

"Laurent!" If I was happy before, I was elated now. Finally, someone I didn't have to hide my secrets from. He knew everything. I didn't have to hide.

"Bella?" He squinted, even though I knew he could see me fine. Old, even very old, habits die hard.

I smiled a little sheepishly. "You remember."

Laurent nodded shortly, looking me up and down. He stepped closer. I could now see his face clearly. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Isn't it the other way around? I do live here," I walked a few paces in his direction. "I thought you'd gone to Alaska."

"You're right. I did go to Alaska. Still, I didn't expect…." He looked at me with a queer expression on his face. "When I found the Cullen place empty, I thought they'd moved on."

He monitored my every movement, including when I winced at the sound of his last name. "Oh. They did move on."

"Hmmm. I'm surprised they left you behind. Weren't you sort of a pet of theirs?" His eyes told me that he didn't mean any offence. When a vampire spends all of his time around a human…

"Something like that."

He frowned slightly. "Hmmm," he continued to stroll towards me. It wasn't until he was about twelve feet away from me that I noticed his eyes. I stifled a soft gasp. I had grown used to seeing the butterscotch eyes of a "vegetarian" vampire. Laurent's eyes reminded me of two things: blood and James. Neither of which I wanted anything to do with. I stumbled back a half-step. He stopped walking and looked at me curiously. "Do they visit often?"

Suddenly he was there, that magnificent voice in my ears. The world was beautiful again, even though he only spoke one short word: "Lie."

"Now and again," I breathed, not wanting to banish the delusion. I cleared my throat and talked more clearly. "The time seems longer to me, I imagine. You know how they get distracted…." I realized I was jabbering and trailed off uncertainly.

His frown deepened. "Hmmm. The house smelled like it had been vacant for a while…"

T he delusion was in my head again, a bit more sternly this time. "You must lie better than that, Bella."

"I'll have to mention to Carlisle that you stopped by," I laughed nervously. "He'll be sorry that they missed your visit." Hoping that he didn't notice my sudden change in enthusiasm, knowing that he did, I kept on babbling, the words choking out of my mouth too fast for me to preview what I was saying. "But I probably shouldn't mention it to…Edward, I suppose-he has such a temper." And like that the wound was reopened. Just by letting that insignificant, beautiful, name cross my lips. "Well, I'm sure you remember. He's still touchy about that whole James thing." My voice sounded odd in my ears, false. Like Barbie, or something. I didn't know, or care. All I cared about was living through this.

Laurent gazed at me doubtfully. "Is he really?"

I kept my answer sort so that he couldn't question my tone as well. "Mmm-hmm."

He took another relaxed step and glanced around the opening. My heartbeat got quicker and louder with every step he took. "So, how are things working out in Denali?" Anything to keep him talking and not killing. "Carlisle said you were staying with Tanya?"

Laurent stopped mid-stride and inclined his dark head a little. "I like Tanya very much, and her sister Anna even more," he seemed to be contemplating something. "I've never stayed in one place for so long before, and I enjoy the advantages, the novelty of it. But the restrictions are difficult…I'm surprised that any of them can keep it up for so long," he smiled furtively and I mechanically took a step back. "Sometimes I cheat."

I froze, knowing only too well what he was implying. "Jasper has problems with that, too." My voice was a raspy whisper.

His whisper was in my head once more, urgent this time. "Don't move." I froze again obediently.

"Really? Is that why they left?" Laurent's voice was politely interested.

"No. Jasper is more careful at home." Sometimes.

Laurent nodded understandingly, "Yes," he took yet another step towards me. "I am, too."

I realized what he was saying in a roundabout way, and started to panic. "Did Victoria ever find you?" My words were laced with an edge of hysteria.

He hesitated. "Yes. I actually came here as a favor to her." He smiled mysteriously again, but didn't elaborate.

"About what," I prodded, edging my foot behind me, feeling for anything I could trip on before I stepped back.

Laurent smiled once more, his glaringly white teeth bared. But this time it was an open smile, a smile that could mean anything. "About me killing you."

I staggered back a bit, so shocked and frightened it couldn't think straight, let alone form a complete sentence in my defense. Only one thought burned across my mind, like an angry girlfriend's hiss. What had I expected? It was true, I knew it was going to happen. But…not like this. He declared it so like a fact.

"She wanted to save that part for herself." Laurent's tone was actually slightly bored, as if he hadn't just mentioned that he was about to suck me to death. "She's sort of…put out with you, Bella."

"Me?" I was stunned that my voice was still intact after the shock I just had.

"I know, it seems a little backwards to me, too." He shook he head and chuckled a little, as if saying, Who can understand Victoria? "But James was her mate, and your Edward killed him. She thought it more appropriate to kill you than Edward-fair turnabout, mate for mate. She asked me to get the lay of the land for her, so to speak. I didn't imagine you would be so easy to get to. So maybe her plan was flawed-apparently it wouldn't be the revenge she imagined, since you must not mean much to him if he left you here unprotected."

I felt like a phantom hand just plunged down my throat, choking me, and ripped out what remained of my heart, the little bit that was built back up by spending time with Jacob. What was keeping him from killing me this instant? Dying didn't seem too bad at the moment. In fact, it was a rather preferable fate that having to deal with all this pain again. My heart was as hollow as it was when Edward left.

Okayyy...thar she blows! I know it's a lot of familiar stuff, don't worry, next chapter will be a little different, at the end, and the one after that will be competely new. Oh, and I forgot to put at the top that I don't own the song "Behind These Hazel Eyes". That is courtesy of the magnificent Kelly Clarkson (woo!!! Luv ya!)

--Dragonfly whisper