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String of Doubt
A string of doubt
Is all that separates
You and I
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It is his job to protect.
General Kozmotis Pitchiner is assigned to guard a prison – one that holds the overwhelming darkness of many terrifying creatures of the Golden Age. He never questions the job. The only thing that comes to mind is his daughter. Expect to guard the prison well for many years, he is told. It hurts him to think that he has to be separated from his daughter for so long.
Seraphina is all he has.
About less than a minute's walk from the prison is Kozmotis' personal living quarters. He is provided with all necessities to sustain himself. He brings along books that he organizes on a desk, to read and keep himself busy with, as well as a journal to write in. The journal seems like a good investment. He will need a place to record his thoughts.
Along with the very few possessions he brings, a locket is among them. An image of his daughter rests calmly inside of it. Before Kozmotis left home, he promised her that the locket would keep him safe. And, no matter how long he was gone, the picture inside would bring him comfort and keep her in his memory, always.
I could never forget you, Kozmotis told her reassuringly as he held her safely in his arms.
Seraphina was upset, but she trusted her father. He never lied to her, so she knew deep in her heart that they would meet again. Until then, she would write to him.
Many letters are exchanged between the two. Seraphina tells her father how things are at home, pointing out any little accomplishments she has made. She is learning how to sew stars into the sky and speak glowworm. She is not very good at either, but she will be in time. Nevertheless, Kozmotis is proud of her.
He never talks about his life guarding the prison with her. There is nothing happy to be told of here. He usually keeps the conversations directed at her and what she is doing. Kozmotis is fine and that's all that matters.
Their conversations through ink run smoothly like this for a long time. They each receive at least one letter on every new moon. But one day the letters just…stop.
"Anything you want," the Fearlings – the prisoners Kozmotis is sworn to protect everyone from – whisper. They like to try and make him think they can give him all of the planets and galaxies, every world that ever existed, but he sees past their lies. He is not interested in anything the Fearlings have to offer him, nor will he ever be.
He has learned not to listen.
One day while retrieving a letter from Seraphina, an unexpected gust of wind wills the thing from Kozmotis' grasp. Wind, here? How strange. The letter very inconveniently slips under the prison door, into the place where darkness lies. He frowns deeply at this, knowing he won't be able to retrieve it. He wouldn't dare take the risk, but still. It's lost forever now.
Behind the door, Kozmotis does not notice the chuckling. Little does he know, the Fearlings can read. They are not stupid creatures and adapt rather quickly to their environment. When they see that the letter is addressed to a father, twisted smiles etch across their faces. Ah, yes. His little girl, they think. Their bodies twitch with the thrill of a new idea.
Much to Kozmotis' surprise, the letter slides back from behind the door. That's even stranger. He stares at it for a while, judging whether it is safe or not, before he picks it up and returns to his living quarters.
But little does he know…
Just as he is finishing up his reply to his daughter, he hears something. Something that doesn't seem quite right. He finds himself standing up slowly as the noise becomes more and more acute to him. He doesn't believe his ears at first, but his features change as a shocking realization becomes crystal clear to him.
"Daddy."
Seraphina. That's Seraphina's voice, but why is she here? She should not be here.
He does not move until he hears it again.
"Daddy!" the voice that sounds too much like his daughter's says, just this time, he hears fear in it. Seraphina's here and she's…afraid? But why-
"Daddy, help me!"
His body moves on instinct, like any loving parent's would. He follows the sound of the voice, his footing growing faster and faster as the voice becomes clearer and more frantic. At first, it didn't make sense, but what if she is here, what if she is in trouble and oh no-
"Daddy!" A sharp scream erupts from within the prison, and harsh sobbing follows shortly after. "Daddy, help me, please. It h-hurts and I'm scared."
His heart pounds violently from within his chest. His entire mind focuses on this one thing as he moves in closer to the prison. All sense of better judgment is ignored in a desperate rush to help. The only thing he cares about right now is his daughter. The only thing that exists to him right now is her pained voice.
By the time Kozmotis is standing in front of the prison's doors, he is shaking and panting. His hands are quick to move, but they stop as they touch the large door handles. Doubt overpowers his mind for the briefest of seconds. What if Seraphina is not behind these doors? What if this is just another trick the Fearlings have set up? What if you are just making all of this up in your head, you crazy man?
He almost walks away, but…
"Daddy." A broken sob.
What if his daughter is behind these doors? What if the Fearlings are really hurting her? What if he just decides to walk away while his daughter is hurt and afraid and suffering? The risks are too large, too great, aren't they? If he really believes that she is in there, then she is in there.
After all,
As long
it is his job
as he
to protect.
believes…
He was wrong.
Got you, the Fearlings whisper.
Right before they transform into an avalanche of darkness that swallow up everything good and beautiful that ever existed within General Kozmotis Pitchiner.
The transformation is painful. It is more painful than drowning without an escape. It is more painful than witnessing a loved one die. It is more painful than being struck by lightning a thousand times over. The Fearlings eat up every last bit of Kozmotis. They plan to leave nothing behind. They eat his hopes and dreams and happiness and memories, until they find absolutely nothing left to take. Darkness fills him up from the inside, twitching under his skin, rushing through his veins, recreating him into something new and, in the Fearlings' eyes, utterly gorgeous.
He screams until he finds no reason to scream anymore. The Fearlings that do not become one with this new man eventually back off, and he is left panting heavily on the ground, eyes wide with nothingness locked inside. He does not move for the longest time, until suddenly he has the strength to sit up properly. He observes this new place. The remaining Fearlings giggle.
He realizes the locket dangling from his neck. His tears the thing away and opens the locket to see an image of a little girl with dark hair inside. He looks at it for no more than a few seconds before throwing it to the ground. It means nothing to him.
Can you speak? Can you see? Tell us what you see, the Fearlings rumbling within him ask their new king.
He is staring straight into the now empty prison, and reports to them all exactly what he sees.
"Pitch black."
They are delighted with the response.
Pitch Black.
He is Pitch Black and it is his job to protect.
Fear can protect.
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I wanted to write something sad. But after writing this I want to write something happy to cheer myself up. Darn.