I hate him, him who is the nagging voice in the back of my head, hate him so much my gun is almost jumping into my hands.
But then he does something human (something unCastle like in ever single way) and for a moment my trigger fingers is put away but only for one single moment because then he's back.
"Hello, there, Niki Heat. Ready to kick crime's ass?"
(then my finger is back and either on my gun or pulling on his ears)
-
"Call me that one more time, Castle, and my gun will be meeting your head, got that?"
But then all my plans of hating him for the rest of our short time together, when ever he finally writes that stupid book of his, were ruined because of how damn cute he is.
(who in there right mind can resist that smile of his, not this cop)
I stumbled into it, more like I was pushed face first, and it was too late not to like the son of a bitch.
"You like me."
The other bad part about this was that when it started he could tell the very moment I slipped up (being nice to him was a big tell), he's the only one who can read me like a book, one that has a pad lock on it that only he has the key for.
And it's clear that it won't be long before he has opened every part of my heart, seeing the broken pieces that I hide so well, and see every single part of me.
But the strange about this all is the fact that I want him to see, I'm ready for someone to break the ice that surrounds me (just try and touch me, be ready to freeze) and I can't believe that he's the one I want to warm me up.
"Yep, I love you, Castle. I want you to be my big old teddy-bear, not."
I was ready, readier then with all of the rest of them (that only stayed for a moment or two), but it wasn't the right time for me or him.
I'll know when that time comes, when the Rick I get to catch glimpses of finally steps out, when he finally grows the hell up.
"Oh, you so like me."
I doubt that will be happening anytime soon.
"And my gun likes you very much."