Paper Thin Hymn

Chapter One

-

He cringed inwardly as his fingers hit the wrong strings for what felt like the umpteenth time that day. The song came to an abrupt and messy halt and his bass player gave him a sidelong glance, "that's not how you play a G man."

"Why can't I do this?" he asked quietly. Sesshomaru then placed his guitar haphazardly on the carpeted floor of the cramped studio and began pacing. After watching him mutter to himself for a few minutes, Bankoutsu Hamada, the band's rhythm guitar player, cleared his throat loudly. The pacing and murmuring ceased and Sesshomaru flitted honey eyes from one member to the next.

They all looked around uncomfortably and he watched as his bass player, Naraku Mache, nodded discreetly to Bankoutsu who stood up and locked eyes with the distressed man, "look Sesshomaru, there are some issues we've been having lately that need to be addressed," Bankoutsu started, smiling easily at his friend as the other two members looked on in wonderment.

Sesshomaru raised an eyebrow, "and that would be?"

Bankoutsu hesitated, "All of us, Naraku, Hiten, and I, think it would be best if we just took a bit of a break for a while. We think this whole band thing is stressing you out, like, it isn't fun for us anymore, you agree?" he spoke slowly, choosing his words carefully, not to upset the six foot something man standing less than a foot away from him.

"You're kicking me out of my own band?" he asked, bemused.

"No! Not at all, we just think that, this band should take a break, all of us, not just you Sesshomaru. Although, we think you're the most break-deserving one of all," his voice held a careful awe that Sesshomaru barely noticed.

"A hiatus?" he asked quietly, thoughtfully as he picked at a tiny tear in his jeans.

"What?" Bankoutsu questioned in reply. He had never been the brightest color in the box.

"A hiatus, a break, or a pause, like you mentioned before," Sesshomaru explained quickly, still scraping his hand across his thigh.

Bankoutsu's clouded expression cleared, "exactly man! Like a year, or something, then we'll come back and start on a new album or go on tour."

Sesshomaru stared. All three of them looked eager, earnest even. He sighed in reply as he walked back to his abandoned guitar, picked it up and rounded on his fellow members, "I suppose a lull in all this would be nice."

Again, Bankoutsu nodded enthusiastically, though he was not exactly one hundred percent on what the word 'lull' meant, "one year bro, starting tomorrow?" Noting Sesshomaru's curt nod, he continued, "of course, we'll keep in touch with each other, to speak of our travels and goings and whatnot. This is going to be great!" He cheered, unable to contain his excitement.

"Wow Bank, one would think you've been waiting for this break for a long ass time," Naraku piped up from behind the rhythm guitarist. Bakoutsu nodded happily, and then started a victory dance that resembled an Irish jig combined with the 'solja boy'.

He stopped and rounded on Naraku as if only then hearing him, "well duh, this eight-tits thing is going to be great!" he exclaimed, marching over to Sesshomaru and holding up a hand in front of his face, then waited patiently for his silver haired buddy to slap the five.

"Hiatus," Sesshomaru corrected weakly, slapping Bankoutsu's hand half-heartedly.

-

As soon as he exited the terminal, the realization of not being in California any longer hit him. The first sign being that instead of wearing shorts and flip-flops, liked they had at LAX, the travelers at this small New Jersey airport were sporting jeans and coats and were either stuffing hats and gloves into their carry-on bags, or pulling them out.

He began walking again, noticing how people politely pushed and shoved around him, following the directions to baggage claim. He looked out a window and nearly groaned. It was snowing, in thick chunks. He hated snow, it was the second sign he was no longer in sunny LA, where the temperature upon his depart had been an amazing 75 degrees.

Shaking his head, he continued his trek. Sesshomaru glanced down at his attire, grey/black skinny jeans, his classic Converse high-tops and a tight, white button down. He was going to freeze his ass off, he knew it.

The third and final sign he was no longer in LA, let alone California, came in the shape of his squealing stepmother who had latched herself around Sesshomaru's thin midsection, "we're so glad you're here!" she repeated over and over, like a mantra.

He could not find the heart to reply.

-

"You're still taking your Prozac, correct?"

"Good to see you too, father."

"He's seriously staying here?"

"Yes Inuyasha, we are his family, you know."

Sesshomaru barely heard his brother's whined reply. He turned to his father, and tried to suppress the immediate self-loathing that bubbled up in his chest. Nodding his head awkwardly, he picked up his oversized black suitcase.

"Well, I'm happy to hear it," was his father's discomfited response.

The four of them stood ineptly in the foyer of the three-story the Tashio family called home. Sesshomaru looked around the three who stood in front of him and cleared his throat, "well, I think I'll go upstairs and get settled."

He stepped around the trio and walked through the large living room and up the wrought iron spiral staircase. Walking down the hall, he vaguely wondered how stupid he was for actually coming back to stay with his family while his band was on break. He could have gone anywhere, and he had idiotically chosen the New Jersey suburb he had grown up in.

Bankoutsu had gone to Mexico in search of Latina babes who could not speak English, but though American musicians were the ideal boys to make bad decisions with. Naraku had decided to stay in California and learn to surf and hit on naïve college girls, and Hiten had chosen to empty his bank account and travel as far as he could go on that money, then call his parents to bail him out when his cash flow happened to run dry. Sesshomaru had decided to go home. His stomach lurched at the thought.

He pushed open the door and took a deep breath, breathing in the scent of stale air. His room looked exactly as he had left it, his twin sized bed alongside the right wall, dressers and a desk sat opposite the bed and band posters and pictures of times with high school friends adorned all four silver/gray walls. He shook his head, shooing the feeling of nostalgia that had crept up on him.

Sesshomaru flipped the light switch, watching as the room became illuminated. Entering the room, he closed the door behind him. He shrugged off the acoustic guitar strapped to his back and let the suitcase drop to the floor with an audible clunk. Approaching his bed, he fell onto it facedown, burying his face into the musty pillow. He counted to one hundred five times over in his head, then sighed, pushing his head deeper into the lumpy matter.

Deciding his attempted at suffocating himself was futile; he turned onto his back and began staring at the off-white ceiling, memorizing every miniscule crack in the surface. His silent reverie was interrupted by his stepmother's tentative rap on his door.

"Come in," he said quietly and Izayoi opened the heavy black door hesitantly.

"How are you settling? Do you need anything? Are you hungry?" her questions came out quickly and jumbled.

Sesshomaru broke his gaze from the ceiling and sat up from the bed and scratched his head thoughtfully, "actually, I'm fine, no need to be concerned about me," he smiled reassuringly, but it felt forced. She smiled back genuinely.

Her eyes shone and Sesshomaru wondered if she was about to cry, but she only smiled again, and excused herself from the room. He was alone again.

-

He heard birds.

He heard birds, chirping.

Rubbing his sleep-filled eyes, he grunted and got up from his bed. The springs groaned in response, but he barely noticed as he walked over to his suitcase that still lay abandoned on the floor. Sighing, he lifted it onto his bed and began to unpack, the birds still serenading him through his endeavor, even though the windows were closed and the blinds were pulled.

Growing agitated, (he had never been a morning person) he muttered complaints about birds and how the stupid things were supposed to migrate during the winter. Sesshomaru blindly grabbed a black v-neck tee and a pair of jeans and headed into the adjacent bathroom to commence his morning 'getting ready' ritual.

Emerging from the bathroom a half hour later, he felt refreshed and finished his unpacking. Sesshomaru braced his guitar against the end of his bed and surveyed the room for a moment. It looked good enough for him and with another defeated sigh, (and another quick thought pertaining to how much air he actually contained in order to sigh as often as he did) he walked loftily to the kitchen.

"Do you know where the keys to my car are?" he asked the person nearest him, his younger brother, as he pulled an obnoxiously bright multi-colored Burton sweatshirt over his head.

Inuyasha grunted as he drank from a milk carton. Sesshomaru's eyes narrowed at his brother. Said brother let out a satisfied gasp and set the milk carton on the counter, "I think they're in dad's computer desk drawer, top drawer or something." He said as he wiped the milk mustache from his upper lip. Sesshomaru nodded and walked to the office.

Sesshomaru rifled through his father's top drawer until he found the keys to his Range Rover. His family seemed to have a fetish for ostentatious autos, and Sesshomaru's seventeen year old self had been no different. He plucked the keys from the drawer, shut the drawer and walked out of the room.

"Where ya going?" Inuyasha asked, showing off his obvious intellectual talent.

"I need coffee," Sesshomaru grunted, gesturing towards the empty coffee pot. Inuyasha nodded, a wounded look on his face, as if his thoughts inflicted physical pain.

"Can I bum a ride to school?" his words were rushed and after he asked, he clamped his mouth shut, as if he had never asked.

"What happened to your car?" he asked, essentially curious, his brother was sixteen after all.

"I got my license revoked for speeding," Inuyasha replied casually.

Sesshomaru smirked, "Nice."

Inuyasha glared and opened his mouth indignantly. Sesshomaru's smirk continued and he turned around, walking leisurely towards the garage. He glanced over his shoulder, "coming?"

Making no move to reply, the younger boy got up from the stool he sat on, picked up the backpack beside him and followed his brother to the garage. Inuyasha glanced sadly at his gleaming cherry red BMW. Sesshomaru noticed his glance and frowned in apathy.

"When do you get your license back?" he asked conversationally as he started the black Range Rover and began flitting through radio stations.

"Don't know yet, I have to go to court next Friday," Inuyasha slumped against the cool leather seat.

Sesshomaru absentmindedly settled on a station and pulled the car out of the drive and began speeding down a residential street. He turned to Inuyasha, "be my hands," he commanded, letting go of the wheel entirely.

"What the hell Sesshomaru?" Inuyasha yelped and grabbed the wheel as the car began to swerve into oncoming traffic. Meanwhile, Sesshomaru was digging around his jacket and jean pockets with a look of concentration upon his vivid features. With a small noise of triumph, Sesshomaru pulled a pair of classic black Ray Bans out of his jacket and placed them on over his eyes.

"One cannot drive without their Ray Bans," Sesshomaru said sagely, placing his hands on the wheel as Inuyasha watched his brother incredulously.

Sesshomaru casted Inuyasha a sidelong glance, "what?"

"You nearly killed us, and for what? Sunglasses?"

"Oh Inuyasha, don't be silly, we were not even remotely close to perishing. I needed my sunglasses, or else our lives would have been endangered by the sun's glare blinding me," Sesshomaru smiled and continued driving, singing along with a hip-hop song that Inuyasha would have normally enjoyed, under different circumstances.

"So," Sesshomaru started pleasantly, "what is there to do around here if you're an angsty twenty-something musician with no goals or plans for the future?"

"Slit your wrists?" Inuyasha guessed.

Sesshomaru laughed, "Not quite my scene, any other ideas?" he inquired quietly.

"No idea, go to Starbucks?"

"I was already planning on that. God, you are unoriginal," Sesshomaru pulled in front of the North Central High School campus, the high school Sesshomaru was proud to say he was an alumnus of, "have a great day at school sweetie," Sesshomaru nearly cooed, his tone patronizing. Inuyasha rolled his eyes and slammed the car door, not bothering to respond.

Sesshomaru rolled his shoulders back and pressed the gas, not really paying any mind to what he was actually doing. A piercing scream caught his attention and he slammed on the brakes, his eyes locking with a pair of wide, bright green hues.

He had been inches from hitting her.

She shook her head, as if to clear her mind from her life flitting through it, and then stared at him. He watched her cheeks turn pink, and then as her face lit up with a smile. She then waved slightly and continued her saunter across the street. The girl glanced back once more and then she was gone, mixed in with the trickle of students entering the high school.

He did not know how long he stared off in the direction she flounced off towards. It could have been seconds, minutes, hours, but at some point in time, a car horn blared. Sesshomaru found himself crashing back into reality, unable to comprehend the gravity of what had just happened.

-

A/N: This was just an idea I was struck with, is it any good?