Conflicting Characters
Cloud is a manic depressive and Sephiroth a sexually addicted heart breaker... the worst possible pairing.
Prologue
Cloud perched at the window sill, cigarette in one hand and a glass of wine in the other. The harsh breeze that rolled in rested on his skin and gave somewhat relief to the feeling of regret that sat in his stomach. It was something that he knew all too well would grow in a couple of hours and leave him feeling utterly miserable.
At that moment in time, he still had a slight feeling of satisfaction, which would soon enough leave him, as it always did.
The sound of the door silently closing came from behind him. It had been done delicately as not to disturb Cloud from his thoughts, either out of genuine decency or simply not wanting it to grab his attention. It was such a simple gesture, but still managed to claw at his thoughts and send the blonde a thousand questions.
Was he already desperate for him to leave... tired of his company now he had gotten what he wanted?
Cloud had promised himself he wouldn't allow this to happen again. It was a recipe for disaster and would eat away at him for weeks to come. All of the sadness and misery that he'd felt following the last meeting and the hours of discussions he'd had to have with his ever worrying counselor had all been for nothing.
It was the worse possible mixture... a manic depressive associating with an uncontrollable sex addict.
Sephiroth wasn't by any means heartless or cruel, but he wasn't interested in romance or feelings. The man was an animalistic, sexually obsessed and emotionally lacking individual. Life was all about domination, control and satisfying whatever desires he had. Sephiroth was an attractive man, painfully so, which meant he had no limit when it came to sexual partners and their availability. It meant he could continue the lifestyle he wanted to lead with no regret.
… But Cloud wasn't like that.
The last two years of his life had been spent sat besides a man asking him questions and feeding him drugs to ease the sadness. He was an emotional wreck, although appeared completely void of human feeling to those that didn't know him. Cloud found it difficult to enjoy the simple things in life and had only agreed to see the counselor in order to keep his position within Shinra.
If it wasn't for cigarettes and numbing himself with alcohol, Cloud feared he would go mad.
Despite all of his obvious issues though, and clear warning signs outlined by his counselor, Cloud had allowed himself to pursue Sephiroth in search of excitement and personal meaning. All of the logical risks that he had feared would eventually come had done... and now it was something he had no control over whatsoever.
That night they had fucked one another furiously, temporarily making Cloud forget all of his worries and simply allow himself to enjoy having the man he desired most. Sephiroth had paid him all of his attention, kissing him as if he were the most precious thing in the world and staring down at him with lust filled eyes. Of course, there had been the hair pulling, the biting and the growling from Sephiroth's side. The man was the ultimate masochist... sexually sadistic.
But once that was all over, and the two of them lay breathlessly on the bed... it would all change.
Cloud snapped out of his thoughts as Sephiroth re entered the bedroom and sat himself on the bed. The blonde was usually told he had to leave, politely, or simply hinted at until the message sunk in. It wouldn't hurt so much if Cloud didn't fear someone else would likely be visiting once he left. Sephiroth was the only person he had slept with in months... He emotionally belonged to him. But that certainly didn't apply the other way round; the man had many, many options.
Although Sephiroth did not ask him to leave, or even acknowledge him for that fact, Cloud felt the atmosphere in the room change and immediately felt like a nuisance. There was no need for him here now, he knew that more than ever after all of the experiences he'd had.
"I'm leaving," he announced, putting out his cigarette and climbing from the window sill.
Sephiroth forced himself up, approaching the blonde and awkwardly wrapping his arms around him. "I'll text you," he said, as always, something that was clearly just automatic to him.
The blonde smiled sadly at him, pulling away from the hug and sheepishly leaving the room. It was something he had done so many times and felt just as miserable each time. Sephiroth would text him? How many times had he heard and waited months upon months to hear from him?
Cloud wanted more than that... he wanted to be wanted by Sephiroth... more than lust.
But he would take anything he would get, desperate to be in the man's company, even if it shattered him emotionally and left him with no gain absolute. At this rate, it seemed, the ordeal was going to kill him.
Why had he ever allowed this to happen?
Just the prologue, a little taster of the story... if you seem to like it, let me know and I'll continue!