iMessage (Weds, 19.45):
G: Penny?
No, Holly.
G: Hilarious. Come to the Penny.
I thought you were consulting your little black book & you just reached 'P'.
G: I wouldn't need to go past 'A'. I would certainly not reach 'H' - let alone 'P'.
Your head is too HUGE.
G: Good, I just ordered two HUGE vodkas to pour into it.
Be there 9, earliest.
G: You look fine as you are. Everyone here is casual.
Patronising! I meant I'm at work.
G: You bore me. I'll be the one asleep on my iPhone when you get here.
That's actually very flattering if you think about it.
G: Just hurry up will you.
Instant Messenger (Weds, 20:38):
Signing off now, meeting Gail.
RL: Another this-is-not-a-date Date? Did she ask you?
She demanded that I meet her at a bar..
RL: Jesus, when's she gonna come out already?
Don't say that! No time soon, at least not to me.
RL: OMG, she's clearly into you.
Ha. I just think she needs a friend.
RL: Well, just make sure there's something in it for you.
Don't worry, there is. I like hanging out with her.
RL: OK then. Be careful.
I will. Thanks. Speak tomorrow.
RL: Tomorrow x0x
Phone Call (Thurs, 08:30)
RL: How was it?
Frustrating.
RL: Frustrating? I told you to be careful.
Aaargh.
RL: Oh no. What happened?
Oh my God, I think I've gone mad. I'm usually so good at figuring things out. Just look at what's in front of me. Work out what's going on.
RL: You are, you're great at assessing things. So, what happened?
I can't.. I don't know..
RL: Well, just tell me the facts and I'll figure it out.
We.. sort of.. cuddled, in the car park.
RL: Riiiighht.
Aaargh. I don't know what to say! She's driving me crazy.
RL: Calm down. Holly? Just give me the facts.
We had The Most amazing night. We laughed So much. We had banter, but there was also a kinda connection, you know? She was open with me. Told me about when she got.. when a bad thing happened to her recently.. she kept touching my arm. She has these amazing eyes, you know? They burn into you..
RL: Oh no.
Wait, it was.. Oh, God, it felt amazing.
RL: What happened.
We left.. We went to the car park.. she just pulled me to her. We were.. hugging.
RL: Hugging like.. friends.. patty, patty, bye now?
No, not at all. She was frozen. She didn't move. I could feel her heart beating. My mouth was almost touching her neck. I could smell her skin but she didn't move. It was like she needed to be hugged. She couldn't let me go. I could feel her breathing on me. It took everything.. I mean, Everything not to kiss her.
RL: Shit, Holly. She probably wanted to be kissed.
What do I do?
RL: She likes you, Holly. It will just take time. She's figuring out her next move but probably doesn't know how to handle her feelings.
I don't know how to handle MY feelings. What if she's leading me on?
RL: She's not. You have to be patient. I doubted her at first but it sounds like the poor girl is at least trying. Did she say anything when she was hugging you.
Not really. Well.. she said something in my ear.
RL: Well, what did she say?
I don't know. I couldn't hear her. Maybe she said it to herself because she didn't repeat it.
RL: Well, did you ask her what she said?
No, I was afraid to do anything in case she.. stopped.
RL: OK, you have to be patient, you hear me?
OK, you're the best. I have to go but meet me later for a drink? I want to talk some more. Not sure how I will get through today.
RL: Hol, this is so not like you. I'll swing by The Penny at 8, meet me in there.
Thank you. Later xox
Instant Messenger (Fri, 10.10)
RL: Did you speak to her yet?
Jesus, f_hell. No. It's over.
RL: Calm down, Holly. Really, you've never been so dramatic.
Oh, God, Rachel. I've totally f_ this up.
RL: Just tell her you were joking, she'll get it, she'll understand.
Joking? About being on a date? She will think I'm the biggest, saddest loser. She already thinks I'm the lunchbox-swinging nerd of nerds.
RL: OMG, has anyone seen my confident, self-assured friend, Holly Stewart? She's got to be round here somewhere.
Fine. I'll just go on down to the station and admit I made up that I had a date. Whilst I'm at it, I'll punch myself in the face and see how attractive she thinks that is. What the F_ was I thinking?!
RL: It's ok, you panicked. Everyone makes mistakes. What was she like when I left? Did she speak to you?
She was hammered. She left right after you. I saw her get up to go so I was like 'hey, you leaving?'. She was like 'Yep'. Cold. You know? I said, 'maybe see you tomorrow' and she was like 'if we need some lab tests, I know where you are'. Then she was gone.
RL: Shit. Well, I saw the way she looked at you when I came in. She looked.. all wounded and all. If I'd known what you'd said to her, I would've left sooner or told you to undo it straight away.
OK, OK, well I f_ up. Uhhh, gotta go, just got an email I need to read.
Email (Fri, 10.16)
From: Charly:
Holly, heard the news re. 15 div? An officer's been shot, a woman. Don't freak out. I'm sure it's not your friend. Brunette, I think. We've been called in to give back-up as they're not allowed out on their own. Rumours are that some freak is literally hunting them. Deranged! Didn't want to scare you, just thought you would want to know - check your friend is ok and all? Let me know. Don't tell her I told you and please delete this email!
iMessage (Fri, 10.18):
Gail, you ok?
Gail, please answer, everything alright?
Gail, sorry to pester you, I heard some bad things are happening and want to check you're ok. Just a quick reply please and I'll leave you alone.
Gail?
Phone Call (Fri,12:26)
RL: Hey
Can you talk?
RL: Yeah, I'm on my own in the lab. What's up, you ok?
She kissed me.
RL: WHAT? When? What?
She f_ kissed me. Oh my God. I'm shaking.
RL: Where are you?
Sat in my car. It's ok, boss knows I went to 15.
RL: You heard about 15 then. Is she ok?
Oh, God. Yes, she's fine. Well, she got shot at but she wasn't hit and it's not her in the hospital.
RL: She kissed you? How'd that happen? What the f_ Holly, I told you!
I went to see if she was ok. I hung around. I saw her. I tried to pretend I was there with a report but she's such a smart-ass. I dragged her into a room..
RL: Oh, this is precious..
I tried to explain about last night. I chickened out half way through. She was looking at me like I had two heads and webbed feet..
RL: Hahaha, I love her already. Go on..
She just.. She just grabbed my head and kissed me.
RL: Was it hot?
It was f_ amazing.
RL: Hotter than the coat-room?
That was me telling her to shut-up. That was different… Actually, this was Her telling Me to shut-up but for.. Much longer.. And with more vigour.
RL: HAHAHA. You're making Me hot.
Shut-up!
RL: So was it like a friendly kiss or a romantic kiss or, what? Spill it. Spare nothing.
It was like a.. I-need-to-kiss-you, kiss. It came out of nowhere I swear to God. The first time, she kind of apologised afterwards, because she just interrupted me in full nerd flow..
RL: HAHA
..but then she was kind of calm and in control and she kissed me again. More slowly, more softly this time. It was.. romantic.. I would say.
RL: But sexy?
Hell yeah! She was breathing A LOT. My stomach was trialling for the Olympic gymnastics team. Don't want to sound big-headed but I'm sure hers was too.
RL: AND SHE'S BACK IN THE ROOM. There's my friend, Holly Stewart. Did anyone see you?
Ha. No, but her colleague was standing outside the door with her when I left so he totally clocked us. I was so embarrassed for her. I just kinda.. ran away.
RL: Have you heard from her since?
No, I just got in the car and called you. I can't think straight.
RL: That's for sure.
Stop it. I'm actually really worried about her, she has to go on patrol and there's a lunatic trying to kill her.
RL: You couldn't make this stuff up. Well, I think you've given her a good reason to stay alive. She'll be ok. At least now they'll be on guard. Too late for that poor woman this morning.
Yeah, I might go check she's ok again, before I leave.
RL: Maybe don't. Give her some time to digest things?
But what if she's shot and I didn't bother to go see her.
RL: Well, then at least leave it until later. Give her some space first.
Ok, you're right. I actually just got a text. Mind if I check it, ring you back later?
RL: No. Go. Good work, Stewart. I love you. I'm excited for you.
Love you too. Mwah.
iMessage (Fri, 13.02):
G: Sorry, I only just saw your messages.
That's ok, you.. kind of.. answered them already.
G: To your satisfaction, I hope.
That would be a 'Yes', thank you M'am.
G: You're most welcome.
Are you out on patrol?
G: Me & Ollie just left a scene. Silent caller. 11yo was mute, her grandpa had a heart attack so she dialled 911. He's ok thanks to her.
That's adorable. I'm glad you're ok. Ollie suspect anything earlier?
G: I think so. He gave me a weird Dad talk but then pretended it was about himself. He's the best, don't worry.
I'm not worried. Are you?
[5 min pause]
G: I gotta go. Big op to find this shooter.
Are you back at the station now though?
Instant Messenger (Fri, 15.30)
RL: Hey, just saw you sign back in. Where you been?
I went back to 15 to see if I could screw things up again.
RL: Oh no, what this time?
Just went to see her and I could have frozen ice on her ass.
RL: She probably needs time. What did she say.
It was more what she didn't say. I know, I know.. I made a mistake.. again. I should listen to you, old wise one. She was with a couple of colleagues so I think she just freaked out.
RL: Prolly. Seriously, if there's one thing you could learn it's patience.
Thanks?
RL: Sorry. She'll be ok.
Yeah well she's out chasing a shooter who's chasing her now. IF she comes back alive then I may have another chance at being anything but a desperate loser.
RL: You're not a loser. You just have to remember that she's new to all of this. You have me to lean on when you feel impatient. Just don't give out to her unless you're sure it's the right time. I'm trying to help you.
I know, I really appreciate it. Thank you xox