A/n: Okay, this is seriously crap – cheesiness and loads of sap. . don't sue me, English isn't my mother language…I myself don't know why the heck am I writing a winter story when it's nearly summer up there… . still, I've been getting a LOT of rain lately down here in South East Asia… and sorry in advance for Satoshi being REALLY OOC…
Disclaimer: I only own what I own – got it? Don't sue me, I ain't Michael Jackson…
Winter Without You
By Chiharu Tanaka
The freezing cold weather didn't mind him much. He just sat there, in his comfortable red armchair, reading a thick, New York Times bestseller's novel. The sound of crackling fire one way or another, relaxes him. He gently rubbed his temples and adjusted his glasses while reading the book; once in a while. His cold, blue eyes that showed so much maturity darted from left to right, reading line by line as the winter morning passed by slowly.
Outside, he could hear children laughing gaily, playing snow fights down below. He didn't budge from his seat, sitting comfortably in the new, state-of-the-art apartment his father had bought him. No, that man was much too young to be the father of this lad aged twenty. Clearly he knew he was adopted.
A warm quilt covered his almost frozen legs. He felt like sleeping, as most low-blood pressure people do when they experience the harsh weather people call: winter. That year, he realized, was colder than years before. The weather report informed the citizens about the blizzard they would be expecting soon.
'I should have taken a break and headed for Australia,' he thought in regret. 'Now, the weather's too bloody cold, everyone's heading there. The airport must be packed.'
Out of the blue, his doorbell suddenly rang. He cursed indignantly and walked over to see the pest who was bothering him at this time of serenity. He swung open the door with a scowl on his face.
"What is it?" he asked, apparently irritated. The 'pest' was a black-haired, brown-eyed, tanned-skinned college student about his age, roughly 20 years old. His pearly white grin distinguished him as a happy-go-lucky guy.
"Ahh, Hiwatari-kun! Long time no see. Can I come in?"
'Saehara…should've known…' he thought, letting Saehara inside the apartment. "Whoa, Hiwatari! Your crib is the ultimate bomb!" he said, admiring the soft, gentle hue of blue on the simple wallpaper, lush Persian carpet on the floor, and the classic and antique furniture all over the house. The walls were elegantly decorated with expensive, one-of-a-kind paintings from famous artists in Paris, as well as all over the world.
"What reason do you have to come over?" he asked, brushing some of his blue bangs aside.
"Oh, yeah. I came over to tell you that our class is having a reunion party. We're holding it at Yamada Miyu-san's house tomorrow night. I'm inviting you over, so do you wanna come?"
Hiwatari Satoshi rubbed his temples again in slight frustration. 'A reunion party? How…as the Americans call it – tacky,' he thought. "Thanks for the invitation, but I simply refuse to go to a social gathering at this time of the year."
Saehara walked over to the lad and patted his back. "Oh come on, Hiwatari-kun – you gotta learn how to live a little! Wake up and smell the daisies, man!" Satoshi just raised an eyebrow at the reporter-wannabe whose father works at the police force – under Satoshi.
"It's winter," he said sarcastically. Saehara frowned a bit, then cheered up again. "Haha, very funny. Just come, it'll be great! I mean, Niwa's going, so are the Harada twins…"
"Harada twins?"
The words came out from his mouth, though it was supposed to be a thought to ponder on. The last time he remembered seeing them was just after high school graduation, where they had left for London to further their studies there. He knew Harada Riku, the older redhead twin, had potential to become an athlete – even though she said she went there to further her studies on biology…but what was the younger twin, Harada Risa there for?
"Yeah, the Harada twins. They just came back from London, if I'm not mistaken."
Satoshi just stood there, pondering. Harada Risa wasn't the smartest girl in school, nor was she the most athletic…all she cared for was her appearance, her fashion, and boys. A typical cheerleader-wannabe girl.
He couldn't say she was ugly, she was by far the most attractive girl in school, next to Hatori Ayaka, with baby soft, luscious chestnut brown hair; big, round amber-golden eyes that seemed to stare intently naively; a slim frame and lightly pink lips.
"Oh, I see."
He blinked in confusion. Why was he suddenly thinking of this naïve, spoiled brat? Sometimes he couldn't understand himself. Being the last descendant of the Hikari bloodline, he was burdened with the curse of Krad – devoting his fourteenth year into the capturing of the phantom thief, Dark.
'But the stupid girl fell for him…' he thought.
"Oh damn! I got a date with the mass media! Kidding, I mean I got to go work on my assignment in the library. Call me if you change your mind, Yamada-san's party is R.S.V.P."
Satoshi nodded and led Saehara out the door. After saying a brief goodbye, Saehara left the apartment. He closed the door and sat back down on his armchair. The faint smell of green tea was indeed relaxing, but why was his thoughts in disarray?
'What's happening to you, Hikari?' he thought to himself. Then and there, he didn't feel like finishing the book. He felt like thinking some more instead.
She was always chasing after Dark, he realised. Though, after she knew Dark was never going to love her the way she wanted him to, as well as Daisuke being Dark's wing host, she seemed to have matured a little.
Sure, in high school she was still a klutz, but she doesn't nag at people as often as she used to. He noticed, she was also less obsessed over getting a perfect boyfriend. She went through high school with an easy breeze as she graduated with excellent results, as well as her sister.
'Why am I thinking of her? Hikari, you are such a dope sometimes…' he thought again.
He knew he had to critic himself later for that thought. Why else would he save her from toppling over into the trap he had set in the museum? Why else would he knock her out, set her onto a safe bench, and drape his jacket over her?
'I guess I think more about her than I thought…'
Her smile was somewhat enchanting. She doesn't smile like Julia Roberts, nor does she smile like a toothless girl of six. Her smile was simple, yet it gave him a gust of weird happiness.
All his life he felt locked up in a cage. His father made him a genius, then he entered the police force as the supreme commander at the age of fourteen. He was forced to keep a calm, cool and refined image. 'Damn that adoptive father of mine,' he thought, kicking the quilt aside.
He felt freedom within her smile. She would usually turn a little pink whenever he looked deeply into her eyes. 'Strange,' he thought. 'She's so strange.'
Walking up and down the living room, he took the cell phone from his coffee table and dialled Saehara's number.
"Moshi moshi – Saehara Takeshi speaking," came Saehara's voice on the other line.
"It's me, Hiwatari. About the party…"
The Yamada residence, a lushly divine Victorian mansion, were packed with spirited young adults as they got together.
Hiwatari Satoshi coughed amidst the cold winds breathing against his face. He opened the door after he parked his black Toyota Vios inside the grounds of the mansion.
Oh, how he had a throbbing desire to see her once again. Her voice, how he had missed it, it sounded like church bells ringing, nightingales chirping; like angels singing in a perfect harmony.
The cold gust of winter wind blew hard against his pale face. His lips felt chapped, badly. He walked towards the large front doors of the mansion and pressed against the frozen doorbell button.
He brushed his cerulean bangs in place, as a tall butler greeted and led him inside. He took off his black snow coat and hung in on the coat rack. He took off his glasses, which were covered up with moist.
"Hey, Hiwatari-kun!" called out a familiar voice. Satoshi turned to the direction of the voice, and there, by the fireplace stood Niwa Daisuke and his girlfriend, the elder Harada twin, Harada Riku, both wearing colour-coded dark maroon coats.
"Ah, Niwa-kun, Harada-san," he said. He kept his glasses inside his navy blue coat pocket and walked over towards them. "Good evening."
The two had changed a lot since he last met them. Daisuke was studying in an art school in France, after being offered a scholarship. Since France was only the English Channel away from the United Kingdom, it was obvious that he and Riku was still going steady.
Daisuke had of course, matured a lot. His bright, strawberry shade of red hair still remained, but he grew up to look a lot like his father Kosuke, with the charming smile of his mother, Emiko. Riku, on the other hand, looked even more ravishing than her tomboy self when she was in middle school. Her burgundy hair grew longer, the hair ends lightly touching her shoulders. She wore green, clover shaped clips on both sides, just above her ear, to keep her bangs in place.
"Konbanwa to you too, Hiwatari-kun," said Riku, not losing a single bit of her Japanese mother tongue. She grinned and looked at Daisuke. "What brings you here? I mean…it's not very occasional to see you at parties…" asked Daisuke, with his nervous and unsure voice. Casual Daisuke speak, thought Satoshi.
"Ah…I thought I'd stop by and see how you guys were doing. It's been what…four years?" he said, though there was another reason he did stop by.
"Yes, and I really miss our lives at Azumano Junior High…we were so carefree back then…" said Riku. She sipped a little more of the red champagne in her glass. Daisuke looked at her in worry. "Hey, don't drink too much, otherwise I'd have to take the driver's seat…"
Satoshi felt somewhat jealous at the close relationship between the two redheads. Jealousy is a sharp stone in your shoe, indeed. "Where's Saehara? I thought he was a party person?" asked Satoshi.
Daisuke chuckled and looked at the fair-skinned lad. "Saehara's been dating Yamada-san, didn't you know? He should be somewhere around this awesomely huge mansion…"
Satoshi gulped down a nervous cough. "Oh, I see…", he said. Suddenly he felt as if the whole world was moving on, and he was the only one left behind. 'Where's Risa,' he told to himself. 'Say it, Hikari, say it!'
"Where's…your younger sibling?" he asked, almost saying Risa's name out loud. Riku looked at him with the same eyes that Risa had.
"Risa? She's using the…ah…water closet. She said her lips were chapped from all this snow."
He wanted to breathe a sigh of relief. Risa was there, and he will see her, and soon. "I see…" he muttered. Riku smiled at him and turned back to talking to Daisuke. Satoshi placed his hands inside the pockets of his black pants to keep himself warm, as he left the couple there and started walking around.
He came across Saehara while walking near the stairway. "Ahh! Hiwatari-kun! So glad you could make it. Listen, I'm really busy right now – Miyu-chan invited more people than our old class…maybe I'll chat with you later, yeah?"
Satoshi gave him a faint, "Yeah," as a reply before walking around in the large mansion. As his footsteps were silenced against the rich red carpet on the floor, he heard a door open and close and a familiar lavender scent he was dying to sniff upon.
Harada Risa looked at him from across the hallway. Her long, chestnut brown hair had grown longer, the ends reaching her petite waist. She had her usual hair ribbon tied behind her head, only this time it was white instead of pink. Her big, amber-golden eyes were as glossy as ever, only now, she looked much more like a woman than a fourteen year old girl. Her lips were lustrous, as she obviously wore shiny pink lip gloss over them. She wore a strawberry pink blouse, with three-quarter sleeves and a knee-length black skirt with a warm, hand-knitted scarf over her shoulders.
"Hiwatari-kun!" she exclaimed. Satoshi felt a sudden adrenaline rush through his bloodstream hearing her say his name that way. She walked up to him and smiled. "It's been a long time, Hiwatari-kun," she said. "Let's talk a while and catch up with each other, why don't we?"
They sat on a sofa in a secluded corner of the large living room, where the rest of the guests were busily chatting with each other. "How have you been doing?" she asked, looking deeply within his eyes. "Fine. I'm still supreme commander, still doing the same old things I did when I was fourteen."
She smiled. "I'm glad to hear that," she said. He looked at her and smiled. "What about you? How was London?" he asked tentatively.
"You know, you should really wear contact lenses more often. You look ten years younger without it," she commented. He chuckled. It was hard to explain to her that the glasses he wore had no degree.
"Well, London was hard, but I turned out okay. I'm on my way to get a degree in business and marketing...life's okay for me."
He smiled at her. "I guess you've really matured a lot since Dark, haven't you?" he asked. "Dark? Who's that?" she asked, and they both laughed together.
"You should smile and laugh more often. It brings out the happy side in you."
He looked at her again. He wanted to tear open the portal to her soul, just by looking into her eyes. She looked back at him, a pink tinge forming on her cheeks. Cerulean blue against golden amber. He inched closer towards her, as the pink on her cheeks turned redder with the feel of his warm breath against her face. Her eyes began to close, and so did his. As their lips were only centimetres apart from contact, Risa gave a startled gasp and pulled herself backwards.
Satoshi slowly backed away from her and repositioned himself on his seat. Never did he feel so embarrassed in his life.
Risa took a side glance at him and asked, "Are you…interested in me, Hiwatari-kun?" Satoshi mentally kicked himself. "Um…of…of course not…not in that way…must be the champagne…" he lied.
"Oh…okay. Thank God you aren't…" she replied in a voice no louder than a whisper. Unfortunately for her, Satoshi had very acute hearing.
"Why?" he asked, curious, and heartbroken.
"It's because…well…I'm engaged. I'm getting married by spring."
You would think a robbery occurred in his apartment that night. The glass frames of the beautiful artworks were shattered as pieces of a glass vase were scattered on the floor. The gentle blue hues of the wall were stained with expensive aromatherapy oils.
The antique furniture was in a mess, a disarray, as cushions and parts of sofas were tossed about everywhere. Clearly, Hikari Satoshi had been in a fuming rage of anger when he stormed through his apartment living room and into his bedroom.
As the rays of the morning sun penetrated through the windows of his chambers, he lay asleep, as he had slept at dawn, his hair untidy, his pale skin paler, as some pillows were on the floor, and the blanket and bed sheet in a disorder.
Much later when the sun rose high above the sky, Satoshi woke up from his three hour sleep when the doorbell rang. He quickly put on a black T-shirt, pants, a blue sweater and a pair of socks on.
He swung open the door, and much to his disbelief, Risa stood at the doorway, looking at him. She noticed his messy condition. "What's wrong? Are you sick?"
"It's nothing…what brings you here?" he asked, massaging his temples. Risa smiled at him. "I was wondering if I could take you out for lunch today…are you free?"
He pondered about it for a while. It was much better if he went out with her than for her to see how much damage he had done to his house. He grabbed the black snow coat from the coat rack and a pair of boots. "Sure, let's go."
After ordering a cup of warm cappuccino for Satoshi, and a cup of milky latte for herself, Risa sat across him at a nice, homey café. The people there talked in silence as the snow outside began to fall once more.
"Hiwatari-kun…" began Risa, after sipping her latte. Satoshi looked at her, raising a hopeful eyebrow.
"Yes?" he asked, his voice barely audible.
"What…do you really feel about me? Don't lie this time…"
Reality's lightning struck Satoshi, hard. He then realised, she really wasn't the naïve fourteen year-old girl he knew. She was a mature and gorgeous young woman, who had found the love of her life…who apparently wasn't him.
He just kept silent. She already belonged to someone else, why would she bother? She never lost her curiosity. He felt so remorseful that he had not realised his feelings for her sooner.
"Hiwatari-kun?"
'There she goes again,' thought Satoshi. 'Stop calling me, you're not taking my surname…'
He avoided her gaze for a few moments. Her large, beautiful amber eyes were looking at him again. How can he deny such an undying love? He turned to look at her. Cerulean against gold.
"Harada-san…"
Risa reached across the table and pressed her right forefinger against his lips. Her eyes were strangely glossy, as if she was about to cry at the moment.
"Please, Hiwatari-kun…tell me the truth…"
Hesitation filled the gap of silence between them. The cold air of winter blew hard outside, but from inside the café, Satoshi could feel the snow melting against his bare skin. The cold penetrated through his skin and into his bones.
"Harada-san…" he repeated, his voice faltering.
His throat felt dry so suddenly. How could he tell her he loved her if she belonged to someone else? He took another sip of his coffee. It tasted bitter, even though ironically, he liked bitter coffee.
"This…isn't the best place to…converse on this topic, Harada-san… "
Risa looked at him, her lips forming a miniscule smile.
"We'll go for a walk later, okay?"
The footsteps made prints in the white snow. The snow thankfully was not falling down on them like rain. Though if it was, Satoshi could have gotten an excuse to get out of the sticky situation he was tangled up in.
Risa walked down the snowy path of the city park beside him, the gentle yet cold wind blowing her long hair backwards. 'Fate is cruel,' thought Satoshi. 'Especially for a cursed Hikari like me…'
"You do have feelings for me, don't you?"
He turned to her, startled. "You're…right. I'm in no position to deny…" he mumbled. "I just realised sometime ago about how much I cared for you."
Risa smiled warmly at him. "Like how you covered me in that jacket of yours?"
He nodded, and turned to look at her properly. "Listen…I really do…care for you," he paused, as he could bring himself to say the word 'love'. "Even though you're going to get married, I'll be here for you…if you ever need me."
Risa looked up at him with tears welling up in her eyes. "You love me, don't you? It's breaking your heart that I'm getting married this spring, isn't it?"
He nodded once more. "I'm not blaming you for that. I'm actually…quite relieved you found someone you love dearly, and loves you back." He felt so much pain telling her that, but he felt like the dark clouds within his heart had been lifted.
She smiled at him, a warm radiance against the cold snow. "Thank you, Hiwatari-kun…" she said. "Oh, wait; I have something to give you…"
She reached into her handbag and pulled out a nicely folded scarf, hand-knitted with a bold striped navy blue and light blue mixture. She handed it to him. "I learned how to knit from a kind old lady in London…I made this one just for you. I hope it…keeps you warm…" she said, her voice faltering slowly.
He took the scarf from her little, dainty hands. Swirling emotions ran through his mind as he caressed the woolly fabric. Slowly but surely, he inched in closer and pulled her into an embrace.
"Hiwatari-kun…"
Tears falling from his cold blue eyes, he said, "Just…please…let me hold you just once…"
Risa closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his waist. "O…Okay…" she said, tears falling out of her eyes as well.
Snow was falling down once more in the city. Christmas songs were playing everywhere as the long awaited day grew near. Children were running all around the shopping mall that morning, pointing at the new games and cartoons in store.
Once more, Hikari Satoshi walked down the lonely aisles of the building, looking straight ahead. Wearing a simple black trenchcoat, a red sweater and black pants, he walked past the shops, feeling as lonely as he did every winter.
The blue scarf on his neck kept him warm and comfy for every winter for the past six years. This is the seventh year, he then thought, when his Sacred Maiden left him the priceless scarf and left for London.
He turned to a gift shop on his right and saw his reflection in the glass window. His blue bangs were as rowdy as usual. The back part of his hair already grew longer, way past his collar.
'I need a haircut…'
He walked inside the lively and posh shop. The walls were painted a rich auburn and hanging from the walls were holly and mistletoes, and more simple Christmas decoration. Strangely, there were barely any Santa figurines and pictures in the shop.
"Good morning, young man; what can I do for you?"
Satoshi turned to a middle-aged woman with dark brown hair, and a motherly smile on her face. He smiled back at her.
"It's nothing, ma'am…I'm just having a look around…"
He carefully examined the items on the shelves. There were snow globes, bronze pen holders, silver photo frames, and much more elegant gifts to offer. A young couple left the store after purchasing some Christmas decorations and a few merchandise.
"Don't tell me a handsome young man like you is alone on Christmas?"
He turned to the woman and smiled with the look of sorrow in his eyes. "Sadly…it's true," he said. The woman smiled sadly at him as he picked up a snow globe and a bag of simple decoration and placed it on the counter.
"There, there. I'm sure you'll find that special someone someday."
She placed the snow globe inside a box with polystyrene and closed it shut. She put the rest of the items inside a plastic bag and handed it to Satoshi.
"I have…but I lost her. Anyway, thank you for your concern." He then paid her, bowed down politely and left the shop. Walking down the lonely walkway, he pulled the scarf closer to his neck.
'Why did you have to leave? I'm not blaming you…but still…' he thought to himself. The last time he saw her was at her sister's wedding the summer after she gave him the scarf. They barely talked, since her husband was there.
Riku had moved back to Azumano and stayed there with her husband, Daisuke. They now live happily with their six year old son, Daiichi. 'It's the curse of the Hikari,' thought Satoshi as he passed by a video games store in front of an indoor fountain.
'Niwa lives life so easily…while I…live it so lonely…maybe I really should have died thirteen years ago. To hell with what Niwa had said about some 'special one' who is actually glad of my existence. To hell with everything.'
He stopped thinking as he felt a tug against his trenchcoat. He turned sideways to see what plant or bench was annoying him at this time of day. To his astonishment, he saw a little girl with brown hair, tied in pigtails, with large blue eyes and pinkish skin, like a Caucasian. She was wearing a pink scarf, a red sweater and a white pleated skirt, and a Barbie handbag on her arm.
"Excuse me…ojii-chan…" said the little girl, stammering. He frowned slightly. 'Oh great. Some stupid tourist let their kid get lost like this…' he thought. He turned around and knelt in front of the girl, setting his groceries and other items on the floor.
"Don't call me Uncle, I'm not THAT old," he said, smiling at the girl. "Can you speak English?" she asked embarrassingly in Japanese with a British accent. Satoshi nodded. "Of course I can. You're not from Japan, are you?" he asked in English.
She frowned. "Yes…I need your help, uhm…sir."
Satoshi smiled. "Calling me 'sir' makes me sound old. Just call me Satoshi." She giggled and exclaimed, "Hai, Satoshi jii-chan!"
"I thought I told you to stop calling me Uncle?"
"How old are you, jii-chan?"
Taken aback, he answered, "Twenty six…"
She giggled. "You're uhm…two tens older than me! I have to call you jii-chan! It's manners, says mommy."
"Speaking of which, where is your mother? Is she around here?"
"I think so…I don't know, it's my first time here…"
He frowned. 'Some irresponsible parent she is…' he thought, before standing up. "Come, I'll take you to the Customer Care Counter."
She frowned as well. "Mommy says I shouldn't follow strangers." He smirked at her.
"True, but if I'm a stranger, why did you come talk to me?"
Pointing a finger at her chin, she said, "Oh."
She quickly scurried to Satoshi and took his left hand. "Take me to the cown-ter, please?" Satoshi held the bags with his other hand. "It's counter. Sure, I will."
The two made their way through the crowd. "What's your name?" asked Satoshi. The girl looked up at him. "Mimi," she answered. He smiled warmly. "That's a nice name."
As Satoshi and little Mimi were about to reach the counter, they passed by a candy store. "Come, I want to buy you something," said Satoshi. Mimi just followed behind him as he picked up a few lollipops and peppermint canes and placed them on the counter. He paid for it and handed the candies to Mimi.
"Here you go," he said. Mimi squealed in joy and quickly sucked on a peppermint cane. "Thank you, jii-chan!" she beamed cutely at him. All he could do was smile at her childish behaviour.
They walked across the path as they approached the lady sitting at the Customer Care Counter. "Excuse me, I'd like to…" said Satoshi, but he paused as he heard someone beside him saying the same thing.
They turned to look at each other, and Satoshi's heart skipped a beat when he saw who was face-to-face across him. The one and the same, Harada Risa barely changed. Her long, silky chestnut brown hair remained the same, and her soft and supple skin was still as fair and vibrant as ever. Her eyes were still the same glossy ones he saw seven years ago. Wearing a simple blue jacket over a cream coloured sweater and khaki coloured pants, she looked so elegant yet so simple.
"Hiwatari-kun…" she stammered, her voice no louder than a whisper.
"Mommy!"
Risa turned to Mimi who was standing behind Satoshi. "Mimi! There you are, I've been looking all over for you!" she exclaimed, kneeling down and hugging her daughter.
Satoshi was at a loss for words. The truth hit him pretty badly, leaving a scalding mark against the walls of his heart. He never expected her to have a child, though the probability was high. 'She is married, and her husband is a British. No surprise if her daughter looks like a Caucasian,' he thought, looking at the two.
"Don't ever run off again, okay? If I knew you'd act like this, I would have left you at Uncle Daisuke's house," said Risa, scolding her daughter as she stood up. Mimi looked up at her mother and pouted sadly. "Sorry, mommy…I promise I won't do it again," she said, raising her right hand.
Risa smiled and patted Mimi on the head. "That's better," she said. She slowly turned to Satoshi, who was standing there like a lamp post. Smiling, she greeted, "Konnichiwa, Hiwatari-kun."
Satoshi felt a large lump inside his throat. Somehow his heart felt uneasy at that moment. "Konnichiwa, Harada-san," he said, his voice low and raspy. She suddenly bowed down politely in front of him. "Thank you for taking care of my daughter…and I'm sorry if she caused you much trouble…" she said, tucking a few bangs of her soft hair behind her ear.
Satoshi readjusted his glasses. "It's…no trouble at all. She was quite the little…angel."
He felt as if her smile could actually melt the snow. 'That's not scientifically possible,' he thought, shrugging the thought off. "Can you show me around? I've never been to this mall before, and that's how I got lost in the first place…" she asked, looking into his deep blue eyes once more.
It was something within her eyes that gave him a spark of light. Something that made him feel warm inside, even though the temperature inside the mall was only 10°C.
"Sure…why not?"
"Mimi's your daughter; huh…she's a bit daring to ask a stranger like me for directions…"
"Then again, you look like a nice person…maybe Riku showed her our old high school yearbook and she somewhat recognised you?"
"Possible. Are you on holiday?"
"Yeah, I have a week's off before I return to London. I guess I'm spending Christmas here with Riku, Daisuke and Daiichi…do you want to join us?"
Startled, he blinked a few times. No one really asked him to join them for Christmas before. Even when he was still a teenager, his father never spent Christmas with him; and with him being anti-social and all, he never made it an effort to attend parties or make friends. Usually, he would just stop by the Niwa residence to drop Daisuke and his family some gifts, but he always refused their offer to stay for dinner with the excuse, "I've got lots of work to do".
"Thank you for your offer…but…" he hesitated. He really wanted to spend Christmas with her, but she already had another to spend the precious day with. Her husband.
"Please, Hiwatari-kun? You look so lonely…"
Loneliness is what he had felt, an empty, void vortex within his soul…but she might be able to fill that gap. Mimi's laughter rang throughout the indoor playground, as she whooshed down the slide with a bunch of other kids.
"Well, if you're that pushy, I will…"
She smiled. "Arigato, Hiwatari-kun. Christmas just isn't the same without you."
His mind was in a sudden disorder again. "Isn't Christmas the same…without me? I've never spent Christmas with you before…" he stammered, his voice barely audible.
"A good reason for you to come over, right? Anyway, what I meant was winter, in general, isn't the same without you. To me, winter just feels so…you."
He smirked. "Amusing choice of words, Harada-san…if you were to write a dictionary, who knows what sort of gibberish would you put in it…" She gave a short chuckle.
They both sat at the bench in silence as they watched Mimi play with the other kids. The young six year old climbed up a swing as the an older boy started to push her. "Whee!" she screamed, as the wind blew her pigtails about. As the boy pushed her harder, she began to feel scared.
"Mommy!" she screamed. Risa quickly stood up and ran towards Mimi, but Satoshi beat her to it. "Don't let go," he said, while holding the chains that attached the swing to the seat. Once the swing stopped, Mimi got down from it and hugged the man, crying.
"Next time, be careful – you could scare someone like that," said Satoshi sternly. The boy's cheeks flared red as he apologised. Risa sighed in relief at Satoshi's damage control and walked up to him.
"Thanks again, Hiwatari-kun…it's kind of hard for me to take care of her alone…"
He caressed Mimi's soft chestnut brown hair as she sobbed into his chest. "It's nothing. Where's your husband anyway? Shouldn't he be here…with you?" he asked slowly, still not over the fact that Risa was married.
Risa's sudden sad expression astonished him. 'Why is she sad all of a sudden? Could it be that he divorced her?' thought Satoshi in panic. He blinked a few times as she smiled again with a sad look on her face.
She knelt down beside him. "My husband…died 3 years ago from an airplane crash."
Bewildered, Satoshi couldn't help but say, "I'm sorry…I didn't know…" Risa placed a hand on his shoulder and looked into his eyes once more.
"It's okay. He died serving the country. You see, my husband was with the British Air Force."
"Oh."
"Come, let's grab a cup of coffee. It's nearing lunchtime anyway."
Mimi's cries subsided as Risa took out a piece of tissue and wiped away Mimi's tears. They both stood up and walked over to a nearby café.
After ordering lunch, Mimi returned to her happy self again and sucked down on another peppermint cane. Risa blinked, confused.
"Mimi, where did you get that?" she asked.
Mimi giggled. "From Satoshi jii-chan! He gave me lots, see?" she said, opening her little pink Barbie handbag. Inside her bag was the sticks of candy that Satoshi had bought for her.
"Hiwatari-kun…"
He shrugged. "I thought I'd buy something for her. Something wrong?"
"No, it's just that eating candy ruins her appetite."
"Oh."
After lunch, they left the café and walked around the mall again. Out of the blue, Risa suddenly said, "When my husband was still alive, we barely had walks like this. He was always busy; but whenever he comes back home, he would always take us out."
Satoshi looked at her and said, "I…see…"
Risa frowned. "I'm sorry about that…it's just that I keep remembering what he last said to me before his last mission."
"What did he say to you?"
"He said that he didn't deserve me. He loves me very much, but he told me that I deserved someone better than him. I told him that wasn't true, I love him for what he is; but he said, there's someone waiting for me, someone better than him. It was as if he knew…about you."
Satoshi smiled sadly at her. "Listen…how about if I send you two to Niwa's house?" he asked, changing the topic.
"That'll be great. Thanks."
The snow fell down gently from the solemn night sky. Sounds of merry chatter could be heard in the humble Niwa residence as Christmas awaits them the following sunrise.
"Hiwatari-kun is coming, right?" asked Riku, taking out a baked fruitcake from the oven.
"He's coming, don't worry," replied Risa, hanging Christmas decorations on the tree with Emiko.
Daisuke was making hot chocolate and coffee for the family, while grandpa Daiki was slouched over in front of the television, enjoying some Japanese wacky T.V. shows. Kosuke, on the other hand was helping Emiko and Risa hang decorations on the tree.
"Watch out, Kosuke-kun, you might hurt your back," warned Emiko, as he climbed up the ladder to put the star on top of the tree. Towa-chan, who was watching over the two children Daiichi and Mimi, giggled.
Daisuke placed the drinks on the dining table and walked over to the tree. "Don't push yourself, dad…" he said, knowing the stubborn guy his father was.
Kosuke grinned and gave a 'peace' sign to his son. "No problem, sonny – I can handle it!"
The doorbell rang, and Risa walked over to the front door. "Hiwatari-kun!" she exclaimed happily as she opened the door and let him inside. He took off his snow coat and hung it on the coat rack as well as took of his shoes.
"Konbanwa, Harada-san…I brought some Christmas gifts."
"Hiwatari-kun, you're here!" said Daisuke. Satoshi smiled at the man. "Long time no see, Niwa. I've got some gifts for you and your family…"
The rest of the Niwa family were glad to see him. He handed some gifts to all of the family, even With and Towa-chan. "I'd just like to wish you all a merry Christmas," he said. "I can't wait 'till dinner's ready."
Everyone thanked him and he sat down on a couch by the window. Risa set aside the box of gingerbread men tree deco and sat down beside him. "I'm glad you're here, Hiwatari-kun," she said.
Satoshi looked at her. "You know…that's the first time anyone has ever said that to me…"
Risa blinked a few times. "Really? Everyone must be really shy around you, then."
He laughed. "You're really amusing, Harada-san."
She smiled back at him. "You're pretty amusing yourself." Risa turned her attention back to the tree when Emiko called her for a little assistance. Satoshi sat there quietly until Daisuke approached him with a cup of warm coffee.
"Hey, Hiwatari-kun…you know about Risa's husband's passing, right?" he asked, setting the cup on the coffee table across them.
"Yeah, she told me a few days ago. What about it?"
"Well, I have a feeling that you love her, am I correct?"
"Yes, and what's your point, exactly?"
"Well, her husband knew, he told me, that he couldn't love her the way you do. You see, you've been waiting for her for seven years, even though you know that she's married…"
"He knew about me?"
"No, he just knew, or felt, that she belonged to someone else. I'm not surprised; she's your Sacred Maiden. Your love for her, in my opinion, is much stronger than any other love I've seen yet. I'm guessing that you won't force her to be with you, am I right?"
"Precisely."
"Then I guess she really does belong to you after all."
Daiichi's light snores could be heard as he slept peacefully on the large bed with Mimi sleeping on the other side. Towa-chan and With were sleeping on the same bed with them, on the third floor. Daiki was sleeping in his own room, whilst Daisuke, Risa, Riku, Kosuke and Emiko were watching a late night movie downstairs.
Satoshi was looking outside from the balcony on the second floor. It had stopped snowing, and his gentle breathing released white vapour from his nose.
"What are you doing here all alone? Don't you want to watch the movie downstairs?" asked Risa, stepping out onto the balcony herself.
"No thank you, I'm not interested in watching movies right now."
Risa smiled as she stood beside him. "Aren't you cold?"
"No, are you?"
"Of course I am – it's freezing out here! I never liked the cold, even if London is colder than here."
He wrapped an arm around her. "Is that better?"
Risa blushed slightly. "I guess. What's even better, is going inside," she said tugging at his arm and pulling him inside. They both sat down on a nearby couch.
"I still am waiting, you know."
She smiled. "I know. Just wait a little longer. I know you can."
He pulled her closer into an embrace as the heater warmed the room up after they had closed the door.
"I love you, Risa."
"I know you do, Hiwatari-kun."
"Just call me Satoshi. I don't like being addressed so formally."
"Okay, Satoshi, if you're so pushy. Hey, that rhymes!"
They laughed. He gently stroked her hair as her eyelids felt heavy all of a sudden. "I feel sleepy…" she muttered, yawning.
"Go ahead and sleep. I'll wake you up in later when Santa arrives."
She giggled. "No thank you, just wake me up in the morning."
As the clock stuck twelve, Risa smiled, snuggling against his chest. "Merry Christmas, Satoshi – winter is the best with you here."
He gently kissed her on the forehead and replied, "Merry Christmas to you too, my Sacred Maiden."
"What did you get me for Christmas?"
"A wedding ring. Wear it whenever you're ready."
Unbeknownst to them, somewhere in the heavens, Risa's husband was smiling, knowing she had returned to who she deserved to be with.
The End
A/n: HOLY CRAP – this is by FAR the LONGEST ONE-SHOT I have EVER written! falls down It took me TWO WEEKS to finish typing this. Phew, glad that's over.
Angel Chiharu: What do you mean, OVER? You have Dance Steps to finish!
Devil Chiharu: Yeah, babe, what she said. pokes with pitchfork
Okay…so it's…ALMOST over. sigh And like, I just realised, Satoshi and Risa didn't even kiss passionately in the ENTIRE story! gasp NOOO
P.S. Look out for a new multi-chaptered story; Risa's Presents. AND REVIEW MY DOUJINSHI "Sacred Maiden" WILL YOU!
I'll go to sleep now.