Six months later, he still couldn't forget her.
She still taunted his memory, flitting among his thoughts like filmy whispers of dreams. It was maddening, knowing that she wasn't his and that he needed to forget her. So he changed that. He knew that she loved him – that love for the man that'd fought so often to save her from the loneliness shone brightly whenever he looked at her. He brought that out.
Oh, he knew that he wasn't the original – that his real body had been destroyed somehow. Ron wouldn't tell him just what it was that had been done to it, but Harry was pretty sure he knew. It'd been broken. Again. His mechanical fist clenched for a second – just long enough for his sensors to begin screaming in pain. He relaxed, and the dizzying ache died down to a dull throbbing in the palm of his hand.
He still looked like himself. For a long time, back when he'd still only existed within the ship's computer, he'd wanted to look like Gene.
A scowl marred Harry's face. Gene Starwind. The man who had repeatedly stolen Melfina from him far too easily. Harry glanced next to him, at the beautifully pale face of the girl who had stolen his heart. Those days were over now, along with his thought that only Gene could take her. In the end, he knew, she had screamed his name. Not Gene's – his. Through some trick of the Leyline, he could remember Melfina's voice crying his name as he died. That memory was what finally convinced him that he just needed to be himself.
And he'd done that. Three months after the Leyline incident, he had walked up to her as she was walking down the street and swept her away.
She'd fought at first, surprised and confused. Gradually though, she had realized that Harry was so much more suited for her. They were similar – no, they were the same. He was capable of everything she was and more. He could protect her. He wouldn't leave her alone at home as Gene so often did.
Ron didn't approve, he knew. Ron said that obsession was only a few steps from insanity. Ron didn't know what he was talking about. Ron was dead.
"Harry?"
The blue-haired man turned to his love, smiling happily at the love glistening in her eyes. She was no longer a slave to Gene – she could no longer sing sad songs because she was lonely.
"Harry, please let me go," she whispered, voice breaking.
For a second it stung to hear those words. Every morning she asked, and every morning it took him a moment to understand that she asked out of love. It hurt her to love him so much – to spend so much time with someone that didn't ignore her. He could understand that. He knew she was just asking to leave to spare him pain in the event that someone would come after her and kill him. He understood how much it pained her to beg to leave. However, he had to be firm and make her understand that he couldn't die. There were copies everywhere just in case such a thing were to happen again.
"Shhh," he whispered back, a teasing smile on his lips. "I love you. I don't care what happens to me just so long as you know that.
Melfina looked away. It wasn't him. It wasn't the man she'd cried over six months ago. That Harry had grown somehow. Gene's first words to her were that Harry had asked for her to sing once more, and she had. She had sung every night, looking at the stars, searching for one tinted blue. That Harry had saved her. That Harry was someone she thought – just for a moment – she might have been able to love.
This Harry was not Harry. This was just a computerized copy running on an outdated version of Harry's personality. She hated it more than anything. She closed her eyes. "Harry, I want to go home. Take me back to Gene."
Crack! Her head snapped to the side, her eyes flying open. She wasn't surprised though. She'd been expecting it – this Harry didn't know how to restrain his anger. He wasn't Harry as he'd been before he'd died. He was Harry on that night when he'd hurt her for the first time on that deserted planet.
Just as he had that time, the android gasped in shock at what he'd done. Unlike that time though, he was now free to reach for her chin and turn her face to his. He kissed her in apology, and she tried to resist the urge to bite him. That would just mean more pain for her in the end.
Harry sighed, shaking his head. One day he'd have to tell her that she didn't need to worry about Gene anymore. Harry had killed the man and his crewmembers as they slept. It wouldn't do for them to kidnap Melfina, chaining her to a past she didn't want to remember.
"Melfina, why won't you come back to bed? Why do you have to talk about him at a time like this?"
She snorted, knowing the sound wouldn't register in his mind, and complied with his commands as slowly as she could without angering him. She tried to ignore the rattle of her chains he hooked them to the bedposts, restricting her movement. She pretended she didn't see his naked body before her.
She couldn't ignore him as he lowered himself into her. Shining trails of salt water dripped down her cheeks, and she watched the skies for a red ship. Just a little longer – it would come. 'Just a little longer and I'll be home.'
Author's Note: My first Outlaw Star fanfic, in case you couldn't tell. I'd like to say now that I love Harry. He's really awesome, he'd beautiful and complex and my favorite character in the show. He's also completely insane. When I saw a shrine requesting fanfiction, the opening line of this popped into my head. From there, I was originally planning something about how he acknowledges that Melfina is with Gene. However, when I started writing him, I realized that he wasn't going to make things that easily. So I changed my mind. I let him tell the story, and ended up liking it far better. In any case, this is the first of my post-nanowrimo fics. Look for more soon! Ja!
Sonoda Aki
