Pain of Loves Victory

by MaryRussellgrl

Looking all around her Sara can't find her place. Can someone save her?

I drank my fifth beer when I got home from work. Hearing about Nick getting the promotion and Sophia dating Grissom opened up the breakdown I knew was coming. I cried as I drank. Walking unsteadily to the bathroom I got out some pills I thought were Tylenol. As I reached in the medicine cabinet the bottle dropped and the pills spilled all over the floor. I sighed looking at them all.

The doorbell went off and I stepped on the pills to walk to the door. Opening it I saw Grissom in the work clothes looking at me.

"Hey." He said, calmly.

I stared at him as he studied my pink eyes and my messed hair.

"Nick said you seemed upset, so I came by to see if you were all right."

"I am fine."

"May I come in?"

I sniffed opening the door wider. He came in carefully looking around then he turned looking at me as I closed the door not looking at him.

"Want to talk?" He asked

"Why, I think Nick getting the promotion speaks for itself." I said, walking past him holding on to chairs as I walked by him to the couch. He watched me sit down and open up another beer next to the row of empty beer cans.

He came over sitting down in a chair watching me.

"Sara, I told you he was more experienced."

"I had experience to, Grissom!" I said, standing.

He watched me walk unsteadily to the bathroom. Standing he walked over to the door looking in seeing the pills all over the floor as I bent down to get some.

"Sara, what is this?" He asked, bending down he picked up the empty bottle seeing the label.

"I have a headache." I said

"These are sleeping pills." He said, showing me the bottle.

I walked past him to the kitchen. He watched me get a glass trying to turn on the faucet.

"What would you be doing if I had never come here?" He asked

I didn't answer as I got the water. He walked over turning me around taking me by the arms looking into my glazed over eyes.

"Sara, answer me!"

I looked at him as he searched my eyes.

"You can leave now."

"No, I am not leaving."

"Why are you here anyway? Isn't Sophia missing you?"

"She's not the one I worried about right now."

I tried to get away from him, but he blocked my path.

"Please leave Grissom." I asked, in a choked voice.

"No."

I sniffed wiping my eyes. He sighed watching me struggle. Slowly he put his arms around me pulling me closer to him. I laid my head against his shoulder crying.

"I am scared for you, Sara. You're going downhill fast without braking. If something happened to you I would feel terrible. The lab needs you."

I sobbed against him as he said that. Moving my head up I looked at him.

"Please….leave me alone." I said, crying. I went past him to the bathroom shutting the door. I sat on the toilet crying hearing him knock.

"Sara, please let me talk to you out here."

I wiped my eyes holding my head in my hand.

"Sara….Sara?" He said

I looked at the pills on the floor as he knocked repeatedly. I bent over picking a small hand full up looking at them. Grissom sighed putting his head on the door scared. He heard the lock turn and I opened the door. I looked at him with pained eyes.

"I don't know what to do." I said

He looked at my hand seeing the pills. Reaching over he took them putting them in his pocket then he led me to the couch.

"Sara, maybe you need to talk to a professional counselor. I can make a call."

"No." I said, lying down on the couch wiping my eyes. He sighed not knowing what to do. I felt his hand touch my arm.

I slowly touched his hand feeling him rub my fingers.

"Don't go." I said, closing my eyes.

I heard him move and I thought he was leaving. Hiding my eyes with my arms I felt him climb in behind me lying down. His arm came around my waist as he laid back against the cushions.

"I am not leaving, Sara."

I sniffed uncovering my eyes to move looking at him.

"This is what friends do."

"Are we friends?" I asked

"Yes, we are."

I wore myself out going to sleep within minutes. Grissom watched me sleep feeling protective of me. He thought about the pills and the alcohol feeling responsible over it all. He closed his eyes opening them again as he heard his cell phone go off. Moving quickly he grabbed his phone out of his pocket.

"Grissom." He said, looking down at me.

"Hey, Gil." Sophia said

"Hey."

"What are you doing?"

"I….I am just helping out a friend."

"Have dinner with me before shift?"

"I don't know about tonight. I'll get back to you."

He hung up looking at me sleeping still. Lying back down he sighed rubbing his head. I moved turning facing him grabbing his shirt. He looked at me sleeping face gently touching my cheek.

"Sara?"

I moved opening my eyes slowly seeing his shirt. Jumping I sat up looking around then at him.

"Calm down." He said, sitting up.

"What happened?"

"I stayed over because you were upset."

I rubbed my head thinking about what happened. I stood walking to the kitchen hearing him get up walking over.

"I should go and get ready for work. Will you promise me you will not do anything?"

I turned looking at him.

"Sara?"

"I'm fine."

He eyed me then nodded.

At work I took two aspirin thinking about the events that led up to Grissom being there when I woke up. Sophia was sitting on his desk talking to him as he nodded standing in front of her with a paper in his hand. I walked over knocking as they looked up.

"Sara, come in." Grissom said

I walked in seeing Sophia grab the paper out of his hands whispering something to him. He nodded watching her leave then he looked at me.

"What's up?" He asked, as he took a seat behind his desk.

"I just wanted to apologize about….earlier." I said, looking at him.

"There is nothing to apologize for." He said "I am just glad I came when I did."

"Why?" I asked

"Sara, I think the pills on the floor speak for themselves."

"I was not going to kill myself." I said, almost laughing.

"I know because I stopped you."

I stood looking at him.

"You think I would do something that stupid?"

"I have seen the signs many times. You were showing the symptoms."

"I can't believe this."

He stood coming over to me.

"Sara, if you ever want to talk to me, I am here."

"I have to go." I said, going.

"Wait!"

I stopped at the door turning to see him come over to me.

"How about we talk after shift?"

"No."

"Sara, please."

"I am fine, Grissom."

I walked out going down the hallway. He stepped closer to the door watching me go. After shift I went out to my car. Grissom stood waiting as I walked over.

"What now?"

"I want to take you out to a diner I know."

"No." I said, getting my keys out.

"I don't trust you." He said

"Grissom, go kiss Sophia or whatever you plan to do." I said, opening the door.

Grissom shut it coming closer to me. I glared at him as he stared.

"Right now I am concerned about you. I want to help."

"I don't need your help."

"Yes, you do."

"Grissom?" Sophia called out, walking over "Am I interrupting?"

"No, Grissom was just letting me leave." I said

Grissom look at me then turned looking at her.

"I'll call you later." He said

She slowly nodded leaving watching us as she walked away. Grissom turned to me.

"What about the diner?"

"You don't give up do you?"

"No."

I sighed looking at the door.

"Fine."

I followed him to the diner out of town. We sat down and ordered. I picked at the table cloth as he watched me.

"Want to talk?" He asked

"No."

"How have you been?"

"Great." I said

"I noticed that your vacation time is coming up. What are you going to do?"

"I am not taking my vacation time."

"I think you should."

I said nothing as the food came. Grissom sat back not touching his breakfast as he watched me pick at my eggs.

I noticed him not eating.

"Not hungry?"

"I am waiting for you to eat."

I looked at him as he watched me. Slowly I picked up some egg on my fork eating a little. He picked up his and started to eat.

He paid for our meal then we walked out together. He watched me walk to my car slowly next to his.

"Want to hang out?" He asked

"I am going to bed." I said

"Good plan."

I left parking outside my apartment looking at the stairs as I just sat there. The next shift I drank my weight in coffee seeing Nick come into the break room whistling. He picked up and apple seeing me on the couch.

"Hey Sara."

"Hey." I said

"You look tired." He said, before biting into his apple.

"I guess I am."

Sophia came in smiling at Nick and waving at me. She sat down at the table not speaking as she took out her cell looking at it.

I got up looking at her as I walked back throwing my paper cup in the trash. I started to leave when Sophia called my name.

"Are you all right?"

I found the question odd coming out of her. She usually walked by without even saying hi.

"I'm fine."

"Gil just said you were upset." She said, shrugging her shoulders looking at her phone.

"Well you can tell Gil that I am fine." I said, leaving.

The next week I walked down the hall with a heavy heart. Nick started his new position and it seemed as if Grissom and Sophia were getting closer. I rubbed my throbbing head rounding the corner when an explosion hit me and I flew up in the air hitting the ground. Grissom helped people to ambulances outside as they evacuated the building. Sophia walked over holding her head as Grissom helped a lab tech.

"Gris." She said

He turned to her seeing the bump starting to form on her head.

"Are you all right?" He asked, as he touched the spot making her winch.

"Yeah."

"Let the EMT's look at that." He said

"Are you okay?" She asked, touching his arm.

He nodded looking around. She walked past him as Catherine walked over worried.

"Gil, I can't find Sara."

He froze looking at her.

"Was she in the building?"

"I think so."

"Okay, check inside. Take Warrick."

Catherine left to find Warrick as Grissom walked around looking for me. I laid on the ground at the side of the building after getting out. My head throbbed with a cut that caused blood to go down my cheek. Grissom walked around sighing as he could not find me. He looked over to the side seeing someone lying on the ground. Walking over he saw it was me.

"Sara?" He called, as he walked over. Kneeling down he touched my limp wrist. "Honey, wake up."

I didn't move as he touched my pulse on my neck. He looked back at the EMT's working then at me. He moved my hair seeing a large bruise with blood. Carefully, he picked me up walking to the front of the building.

The doctor came out in the hallway of the hospital.

"Mr. Grissom?"

Grissom stood from a chair walking over to him.

"Yes."

"You came in with Miss. Sidle."

"Yes, how is she?"

"Mild concussion, other than that she is fine. I want to keep her here overnight then she can go home. Are you a relation to her?"

"No, I am her boss."

"Hmm, she put you down as her only emergency contact."

Grissom looked surprised at this. He walked with the doctor to my room. Opening the door Grissom walked in seeing me sleeping with a bandage over my bruise. He walked over looking at my pale face. Taking my hand he rubbed it watching me.

I was aware of someone holding my hand. Moving my head a little I breathed in.

"Whose there?" I asked, weakly.

"It's me honey." Grissom said

"Gris?"

"Yes, how are you feeling?"

"Tired."

"You have a mild concussion." He said, reaching over touching my cheek.

"You called me honey." I said, not opening my eyes.

He looked down breaking contact with my hand. I missed his hand on my cheek.

"Rest, and I'll be back to check on you." He said

He came back the next day talking to the doctor. When he came into my room I was slowly tying my shoes.

"Hey." He said, coming over to me.

"Hey."

"Your doctor said you can go. I thought I would take you home."

"I was just going to call a cab."

"I am here, so I will take you."

I tiredly nodded letting him lead me out. Once in his car I closed my eyes sitting back as he got inside. I opened my eyes as he moved over to me fastening my seat belt. He moved back looking at me. I watched him pull my face to him. His lips went to mine in a sweet gentle kiss. I moved back opening my eyes looking at him. He looked at my lips moving in again. This time it was a slow kiss. I moaned a little as he took his time. Moving back he took a breath looking at me. I looked at him in a daze.

He said nothing as he sat back in his seat starting the engine. I looked at him then closed my eyes laying my head back. He parked outside my place looking over at me.

"Sara."

I moved my head to see where we were. I looked over at him as he looked at me.

"Will you be all right?"

"Yes, thanks."

He watched me get out walking slowly to the stairs. Getting out of his car he walked over as I stopped looking at him.

"Need help?" He asked

"Um….sure."

He took my arm leading me up the stairs. I gave him my key and he unlocked the door handing me the keys. I looked at him then into my house.

"I want you to take a week off."

"A week?"

"Sara, you may be all right, but I want you to take some time to rest."

"Fine." I said, sighing.

He nodded satisfied.

"Well thank you again."

"No problem. I am just happy your okay."

I looked at him as he fidgeted as if he was trying to work up to something. I looked at his lips wishing they were against mine.

"I better go and…." He started to say. I moved over kissing him. He slowly put his arms around me as I moved closer putting my arms around his neck. Our lips moved in rhythm as he deepened the kiss. His cell went off as we continued the exploration of each other's mouths. It went off only to ring again. Grissom moved his head away from mine looking at me. I looked at him closing my eyes laying my head against his shoulder as he answered his phone putting his other arm around my waist.

"Grissom."

He listened to the person as he looked down. I put my hand on his jacket moving my head closer to his neck.

"I will see you before shift and we can talk." He said, hanging up.

He walked me inside the apartment closing the door. I kissed his neck as he stood by the door.

"You need to rest." He said, as he closed his eyes.

"I'm not tired." I said

"I can make you something to eat."

"I am not hungry."

He sighed moving his head kissing my cheek. I moved to look at him as he touched my cheeks looking deeply into my eyes.

"Will you stay?" I asked

"I would like to, but I feel like I need to go and …think about things."

"Oh." I said, looking down.

"Sara."

"No, you should go. I will rest and eat I promise." I said, moving away from him.

He watched me wave at him then I escaped into my bedroom. I heard the door close as I laid in bed.

The week was long and boring and I never heard from Grissom again until I came back and was walking down the hall when I bumped into him. He steadied me with his hand.

"Sorry." I said, walking past.

"Sara, how are you?"

"Fine." I said, walking on. He watched me go then slowly walked on his way.

I pulled a triple about to go on my fourth shift as the case I was on consumed me. I sat in the locker room looking at nothing as the door opened and someone came in.

I laid my head in my hands trying to ease the throbbing in my eyes. A locker closed and I felt someone kneel down in front of me taking my hands from my eyes. Grissom looked concerned at me.

"Are you all right?" He asked

"I'm fine."

He noticed my dark circles under my eyes.

"Why don't you go home?"

"I have to work." I said, yawning.

"Sara, did you work a triple?"

I slowly nodded

"Sara, your going home."

"I am working."

"You shouldn't be working now." He said, standing me up. He walked with me outside following me to my car. I looked back at him as he waited for me to open the door. His phone started to ring he got it out while looking at me answering. I opened the door to the car getting in. He waved at me as I pulled out.

I slept the day away not waking till my phone went off. I moved on the couch slowly reaching over to answer it.

"Sidle." I said, in the pillow.

"Your late." Grissom said

I jumped up looking at my watch.

"Oh, I'll be right there."

I ran out not changing getting in the car driving to the lab. I changed and showered in the locker room coming out seeing him standing there looking less than pleased.

"My office now." He said, walking by. I sighed following behind him. He went in his office waiting for me. I went in as he closed the door.

"I know your mad." I said

"I am past mad. I expect you to come in on time not pull triples and come in late."

"I know." I said, looking down.

"Is this case getting to you?" He asked, standing in front of me.

"No."

"Good because if it is I will pull you off it."

"Can I go now?"

"No."

I looked down waiting.

He watched me as he sighed.

"Grissom, why did you call me honey?" I asked

He looked at me surprised.

"Sara, I can't talk about this here."

"Right." I said, stepping back.

I left without another word.

Grissom walked out with Sophia in the parking lot as I came out. He had his arm around her middle and was talking to her. I watched them as they stood by his car smiling at each other. Then he said goodbye getting in his car leaving as she did the same. It started to rain as I got in my car. I was driving when my car started to make sounds. It stopped on the side of the road not turning over again. I put my head on the steering wheel sighing. My hand went down to get my phone and I realized it was at work. Looking out I saw that I was near Grissom's home. The rain came down hard by the time I got out of the car.

Grissom smiled at Sophia as he cut a tomato. She sat on a stool watching him.

"Where did you pick up cooking?" She asked

"My mother."

"She must be something."

"She is." He said, looking at her.

A hurried knock distracted them.

"I wonder who that is." He said, wiping his hands with a towel.

"I'll get it." Sophia said

He smiled watching her go. She walked to the door opening it seeing me soaked and shivering.

"Sara?" She said, looking at me.

I stared at her feeling silly for even coming.

"Oh….I." I said, or started to.

"Do you need something?"

"Um…no. I am sorry I bothered you." I said, leaving. Sophia shut the door seeing Grissom come out looking at her.

"That was weird."

"Who was it?"

"Sara." She said, coming over to him.

"Sara?"

"Yeah, she was soaked. I don't know why she came here."

"Where is she now?" He asked, looking around.

"She left."

"Left?" Grissom asked, going to the door opening it looking out.

I walked down the street feeling upset about seeing Sophia at his house. They were obviously having a romantic evening and I spoiled it. Walking over to a bench I sat down on it. Cars went by splashing the curb. A car stopped nearby and someone got out holding an umbrella.

"Sara?" Grissom said, coming over "What are you doing?"

"Enjoying the weather." I said, looking up at him.

"Your soaked, let me take you home."

"No, I'll get a cab."

"What happened to your car?"

"It broke down."

He nodded understanding.

"Cabs are scarce. I will take you home."

I stood looking at him.

"What about Sophia?"

"She is at my place" He said, taking my arm walking to his car. I got in shivering. He got in turning on the heat. We drove to my place. I watched him get out and run over to my side with his umbrella. We ran up to my place going in.

"Go change." He said, as he closed the door.

"You should go and be with Sophia."

"I'll call her."

I sighed watching him grab his cell phone. He put it to my ear pointing at my bedroom telling me to change. I went in changing into my purple pajamas drying my hair. I came out smelling something good. Grissom came out of the kitchen looking at me.

"I put in vegetable Lasagna; it should take forty five minutes."

"I feel guilty about Sophia."

"Don't. I told her I would see her later."

"But you were having a romantic dinner with her."

"Sara." He said, coming over touching my hands "It's all right."

"Um…want to watch something."

"Okay." He said, walking over to the couch. I slowly went to the chair sitting down. Grissom looked at me as the movie played on the TV. I looked over at him as he looked back at the movie. He looked back at me as I looked at him.

"You can come over here."

I slowly moved over to the couch to the other side. Grissom looked at me as I glanced at him. He patted the spot next to him and I moved closer. He put his arm around me pulling me closer.

"You're shaking." He said

"I guess I am a little cold."

He got up getting the folded blanket I had on the back of the chair undoing it he spread it over me then sat down with his arm around me again. I pulled it closer to my body. He looked over at me as I moved closer to him. I looked at him as he moved closer lifting my face with his hand he kissed me. He laid me back pulling the blanket over both of us as his body came on top of mine. He moved his head down to my neck kissing spots as I gasped closing my eyes. He kissed me again and the oven timer went off.

He sighed looking over.

"I'm not hungry yet." I said

He kissed me again getting up turning off the oven as he took out the lasagna placing it on the counter to cool. I watched him come back climbing over to me again. I kissed him putting my arms over his back.

"Grissom?"

He opened his eyes looking down at me.

"Does this mean you….want to have a relationship?"

"I think so. If you'll let me."

I looked at his lips then at his eyes.

"What about Sophia?"

"Don't worry."

I reach up catching his lips. He groaned as we deepened the kiss. I woke up later feeling him moving beside me on the couch. I looked at my watch seeing it was half an hour till we had to get ready for work. I looked at him sighing just content to look at his sleeping relaxed face. I reached over touching his hair watching him move his head opening his eyes looking at me.

"Hello." He said

"Hello."

"What time is it?"

"2:35."

"I have to go home and change."

"Me to."

He leaned over kissing me. I pulled him closer.

"What….do we do about….work?" I asked, between kisses.

"At work I am your boss."

"Out of work what are you?"

He kissed my neck gently.

"Out of work I am….the man who comes and kisses you."

I giggled as he said that.

As far as I know Grissom did end it with Sophia although she still talked to him closely in his office. Grissom and I went on a scene together in the middle of a neighborhood. He went to get the camera I held. I smiled at him as he took the strap off my arm letting his hand glide down it.

We went back to the lab and worked in the garage on a car. I bent over a seat looking at it as he walked in slapping on some gloves.

"What do you got?"

"I don't know. Pass me the luminal."

He gave it to me and I sprayed the seat. The entire chair lit up. I sighed looking at it glow.

"That is a massive amount of blood. This has to be where our victim died."

Warrick came in seeing us.

"Grissom, we have a situation." He said, looking upset.

"I'll be back." Grissom said, as he touched my shoulder. I nodded watching him leave with Warrick.

"She was questioning him and he just went ballistic. I managed to get him off her with Brass's help, but some damage was done." Warrick said, as he led Grissom down the hall to the lounge.

"Is she hurt badly?"

"She is in shock and there is a bruise on her head."

"Okay, go help Brass, and I'll talk to her."

"Okay."

Grissom watched Warrick leave then he walked into the lounge seeing Sophia sitting in a chair in the corner. She looked over at him watching him walk over kneeling down to look at her.

"You okay?"

"Yeah." She said, as she trembled. He looked at her head touching it watching her winch turning her head.

"What happened?"

"The guy went crazy."

"I want you to go and get checked out then go home."

"But…the case."

"Let Warrick handle it."

She stood looking at him a moment.

"Okay."

"Get some rest." He said, touching her nose.

He watched her go then he came back in to me.

"Everything all right?" I asked

"Yeah." He said, putting gloves on.

Grissom brought me to his place after we ate after shift. He led me into his bedroom. I looked around as he took his coat off then he came to me.

"I don't have anything to wear." I said

"I'll give you something." He said, going to his dresser. I went to the bathroom changing into a pair of black shorts and a gray tee shirt. He was in bed sitting up wearing a blue tee shirt waiting for me.

"What do you think?" I said, modeling them.

"I think your beautiful."

I took a breath fluttering inside as he said that. He moved the covers for me to come in beside him. Nervous I walked over getting in pulling the covers over me. He moved over kissing me slowly.

"Sara?" He said, between kisses.

"Hmm."

"I don't want to rush this. I want to take it slow."

"Me to." I said, looking at him touching his hair.

He smiled leaning down kissing me again. Waking to his scent on the pillows put a smile on my face. I sighed curling my body as I laid on my side. Movement behind me told me he was still in bed. His arm went around my waist as he kissed my neck.

"Good Sleep?" He asked, against my hair.

"Mmmhmm, you?"

"Yes."

"I don't want to get up."

"Have to work." He said

I stilled as he looked at the wall on my side. He sighed again moving getting out of bed. I could hear his feet padding around the room then the bed went down and my hair was moved.

"Sara."

I opened my eyes looking at him.

"Your cute when you wake up." I said

He smiled as he got up. I watched him go into the bathroom then I sat up touching my messy hair.

Grissom had meetings all shift as I worked on the case. Brass walked with me to a house along the street where the crime took place.

"The guy that lives here is a loose cannon." Brass said

"Loose cannon?"

"Yeah, a Jacob Raines. He moved here a year ago and the neighbors told me that the police have been here numerous times because of disturbances."

"Looks like he is not home." I said, as he walked up to the door.

Brass knocked on the door. I looked at him then watched him knock again. He looked behind me at the two officers motioning them to help him. I stood aside as they got their guns out and opened the door. They went in looking around. I went in looking around. Brass walked down the hallway with the officers. I looked at some photos on the wall.

"Sara!" Brass yelled

I walked down the hall seeing him standing outside a room waiting for me. I looked at him then I looked in the room. Flies buzzed around the room as a man's body lay on the bed. His stomach was open as his entrails were spread out on the bed from inside his belly. Blood was everywhere in the room. I stared at the scene in shock.

Grissom walked up the driveway outside the house carrying his case seeing policeman come out throwing up by some bushes. Brass came out looking at Grissom.

"Where is Sara?"

"Inside with the body. Dave's in there to."

I listened to Dave talk as he checked the body. I could hear a beeping coming from somewhere.

"Dave, do you hear that?"

He stopped talking listening.

"What is that?" He asked

I went to the closet next to the door opening it looking inside. Then I looked at the bed. Dave watched me kneel down looking under it. I froze as I saw a square box attached to the bed frame that beeped.

"Oh…." I said

"Sara, what is it?"

"Dave, don't move the body. Go outside tell Brass to get the bomb squad in here now."

"Okay." He said, running out.

Grissom came in seeing me trying to get a better look at the bomb.

"Sara."

I looked at him.

"Come away from there now."

"Gris, I think there is a fingerprint on the box."

"Sara, don't touch it. You could trigger something."

"Give me a minute." I said, opening my case getting out the finger print powder and brush.

"Sara!"

"I can do this." I said, lying down dusting. The beep got louder as I worked.

"If you don't come out of there now I will write you up!"

I put tape on the spot then ripped it off getting a print. I got up taking my case running out with Grissom. As we ran out of the house going down the drive way the place blew. Grissom threw himself on me as we hit the ground. Everyone ducked for cover some screaming.

Silence followed after debris settled around us. Brass ran over to Grissom and I.

"You guy's okay?"

"Yeah." Grissom said, as he lifted his head. I coughed looking around.

Brass got on his phone calling as he walked away. Grissom helped me up as we looked back at the remains of the house.

I slept in bed later feeling Grissom move closer to me. He sighed lying still as I moved to lie on my back opening my eyes looking at him. He breathed in deeply looking relaxed. I moved my head kissing my lips gently. He slowly slid his eyes back to look at me.

"Can't sleep?" He asked

"No, I keep thinking about shift."

"You mean when we almost were blown up?"

"Yeah."

He touched my cheek smoothing it with his fingers.

"What about it?"

"I don't know. It just made me think about life and what if something does happen to us…to you."

"That's the chance we take, Sara."

"What if something happened to you the next shift? We just became this…..couple and I would lose you." I said, sitting up looking at him.

"Sara, we work in an unpredictable environment. Things will happen, but when they do we must do what we can." He said, kissing my head "I love you."

I leaned back looking at him.

"You love me?"

"Yes, is that bad?" He asked, looking at me.

"No…no, I love you."

He put his hand on my cheek pulling my face to his. He looked at my lips before kissing them. All the passion he kept hidden came out in full force. I was whisked away on a sea of clouds. My pajamas were taken off leaving me naked under his stare. His tee shirt and shorts were thrown to the floor. Grissom woke feeling my naked body against his. He looked at the alarm clock on his side then he looked at me sleeping with my head against his arm.

"Sara?"

I moved my head feeling him kiss me.

"Mmm." I moaned, as he pushed me back against the mattress.

"We have a case and I have to change for work." He said, as he looked down at my covered naked body.

I smiled making him look back at me.

"Whatever you are thinking is not going to happen. We will be late and I don't think your other employees would look kindly at their boss being late."

I gave him a quick kiss then I got up to dress.

Ecklie walked down the hallway trying to find Grissom who was sitting in his office looking at some pictures of the crime scene.

"Gil, can we talk?" He asked, gently knocking on the door.

"Of course." He said, sitting back in his chair.

Ecklie sat down sighing as he straightened his gray suit coat.

"I was told about the bomb going off at the crime scene."

"Yes, it did. We got what we needed."

"That's not the point, Gil. Sara was in violation of a direct order because of her sloppiness we lost a crime scene not to mention a body of a suspect. I told you before she was a loose cannon. I want her out."

"Conrad, if anyone is responsible it is me."

"She did not follow an order that you put out. She is gone right now." He said, standing.

Grissom closed his eyes sighing as Ecklie walked out.

I was walking out of trace with a paper when Ecklie walked over snatching it from my hands.

"Your to get your things out of your locker and leave the building." He said

"What?"

"Your fired."

"But…..the case?"

"You don't have a case. Leave the building." He said, walking away.

I watched him leave then I ran to Grissom's office.

"What is going on?" I asked

"What?" He said

"Ecklie told me to leave."

Grissom stood coming around to me.

"I'll talk to him."

Ecklie walked in seeing us together.

"I told you to leave."

"I wanted to talk to Grissom."

"Grissom has nothing to say about this. Now do you leave or do I call someone to escort you out of the building?"

I looked at him then at Grissom.

"Well?"

I sighed walking out Ecklie gave Grissom a look before he went out as well. I stared at my TV when I got home. A knock caused me to jump. I got up going to the door opening it seeing Grissom.

"You okay?"

"No."

"Can I come in?"

"Why?"

"To talk."

"I don't think so."

"Sara….I won't stay long."

"No." I said, shutting the door. He sighed looking at it. I heard him open my door holding the spare key I hid under my one flower pots.

I got a beer off the counter hearing him walk over grabbing it from my hand.

"Give that back right now!" I said, trying to get it.

"No."

I stepped closer trying to grab it.

"No Sara."

I sighed sitting on a stool looking down. He put down the can on the far end of the counter then he sat on a stool in front of me.

"I talked to Ecklie for half of the shift and he agreed to have you come back."

I looked at him as he took my hands.

"There is a catch. You are to be on day shift."

"What?" I said, standing "Gris, I want to be in night shift."

"I can't sway Ecklie. You start on Monday."

I sighed walking over to the couch. Grissom came over sitting down next to me.

"Sara, this will not change between us. We will still see each other."

"I feel like this is a nightmare." I said

He pulled me against him.

I started work on day shift meeting my new supervisor and then going out with the team to one of the hotels on the strip. While the others made conversation on the ride back to the lab I sat in the back looking out at the window hating every moment.

Grissom came in getting mail from the front desk as he walked to his office. I walked over watching him put down his brief case by his desk opening his mail. He looked over seeing me putting down the mail he leaned against his desk.

"Hey."

"Busy?" I asked

"No, come in."

I shut his door walking over to him.

"Everything all right?"

"Yeah." I said

He put his hands in mine pulling me to him.

"You sure?"

I nodded putting on a fake smile. He smiled back pulling me closer as he kissed me.

"Do you like Petersen?" He asked, about the supervisor.

"Yeah, I think he is cute."

"Cute?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

I kissed him again.

"He reminds me of you."

"Oh."

"I wish I was working with you."

"Me to." He said, touching my cheek "Are you going home?"

"Yes, I am going to take a long hot bubble bath."

"Why do you say that when I can't do anything about work?"

I chuckled stepping away from him to go to the door.

"Sara?"

"Yeah?" I said, looking over at him.

"I love you."

"I know."

He smiled watching me leave.

A month later I was attacked as I went alone to an out of town crime scene. I woke in a trunk of a car with my head throbbing and my body aching. The car stopped and I froze listening as the car door shut. The person checked the trunk lock then left. I sighed looking around for the inside locking mechanism. A click told me that it was unlocked. Slowly I lifted the trunk hood looking around seeing that the car was in the middle of nowhere in the desert. I could hear voices from somewhere far off as I got out looking around. There was a beat up building to the right that looked like a house or an old gas station. I hid behind the car as I quietly shut the trunk looking around at the different directions. Deciding to move I ran out into the desert as fast as I could hiding behind some rocks. The heat got worse as I walked for ages looking back to make sure that I was not followed.

Grissom woke to his phone going off. He picked it up looking at the ID seeing Brass was calling. He opened the phone putting it to his ear.

"Grissom."

"Gil, we have a situation." Brass said, as he walked outside the police station.

"What?"

"Petersen told me that Sara is missing."

Grissom sat up alarmed.

"I'll be right there."

"Good we need all the man power we can take."

I sat down in some shade by a bush wishing I had some water. I closed my eyes touching my head. Getting up again I started to walk reaching into my pocket feeling my phone. Almost laughing I lifted it up looking at the power then I tried reaching Grissom.

He walked with Brass and Petersen down the hallway talking about the different places I could be when his phone went off. He picked it up seeing my name.

"It's Sara." He said, stopping to answer "Sara, where are you?"

"I….I don't know….I am in the desert….walking."

"She's in the desert." He said, to Brass.

"Are you okay?"

"My head hurt's." I said, looking around.

"Can she see anything that could help us find her?" Brass asked

"Sara, is there anything around you that stands out?"

I looked around not seeing a thing.

"No, except there is a large rock up ahead. Looks like a glove."

"Good, Sara. We're coming to find you. Just hang in there."

I hung up walking over to the rock. The sun was setting as I sat down on one trying not to think about my throbbing headache.

Grissom and Brass drove with an army of police and CSI's behind them as they turned down a dusty road to the desert. The helicopter overhead went further down the road.

"Okay the rock is half a mile up the road." Brass said

Grissom nodded as he drove at full speed. I woke hearing sirens. Closing my eyes I winched at the pain in my head. Grissom stopped the Tahoe and jumped out with Brass running to the rock.

"Sara!" Grissom yelled

"Gil!" Brass called

Grissom ran over where Brass was pointing over at me on a rock. Grissom climbed up kneeling down to me.

"Jim, I need an ambulance!"

Brass ran off as Grissom smoothed my hair looking at my head wound. He got a bottled water lifting my head watching me drink.

I don't remember much after him finding me. I woke in a white room hearing a beeping. The door opened and Grissom came in touching my hand.

"Sara?"

I opened my eyes seeing him.

"You found me."

"Your going to be fine. The doctor said you have to be in here for a few days because of your head, and then you can come home." He said

"What's wrong with my head?"

"Ssh." He said, kissing my lips "He was just concerned because you hit it hard on something."

"Oh."

"Don't worry."

"Are you leaving?" I asked, gripping his hand.

"No, I am going to stay here for a while."

I closed my eyes sighing feeling his lips on my cheek and head.

A few days later I was at Grissom's since Petersen put me on sick leave. I came out of his bedroom seeing he was standing in the living room with his back to me.

Walking over I wrapped my arms around his middle kissing his neck.

"You were up early."

He turned looking at me holding a small box in his hands.

"Sara, this might be to soon, but I really can't think of anything else to do." He said, handing me the box.

I looked at him then I opened the box seeing a beautiful diamond ring inside.

"Will you marry me?" He asked

"I…have wanted this to happen for a long time." I said, putting my hand over my mouth.

He took the ring taking my hand slipping it on my finger. I hugged him as he hugged me sighing with relief.

At work the next week I walked in the door proudly wearing my ring for all to see. Petersen sent me with him to cover a crime scene in an alleyway. His cell rang as he photographed some evidence. He grabbed his phone as I leaned over looking at a piece of tire.

"Petersen." He said

I smiled thinking about Grissom's greeting on the phone and how much Petersen sounded like him.

"Hey, Gil." He said, looking over at me. I looked at him standing.

"We are doing fine." He said, nodding to me as I went back to looking at evidence "She's fine. Congrats on the engagement. I saw the ring."

He walked away talking to him.

After shift I walked into Grissom's office looking for him, but he was not there. Lying on his sofa I waited hearing people walk by talking.

"I told you two my advice." Grissom said, as he entered his office.

He looked over at me as Warrick and Sophia came in behind him.

"Gris, we have the suspect. It would help if we could search his house and back yard." Sophia said

"Fine, but Brass goes with you."

They both looked at each other then at Grissom.

I waved as they left. Grissom walked over rubbing his head.

"Headache?" I asked

"The start of one."

"Good thing I am here then." I said, stretching out my fingers.

He smiled walking over to close the door before he laid down on the couch. I sat up messaging his neck.

"How is that?"

"Good." He said, mumbling into the couch.

I continued as he moved his head some.

"Hey." I said, as I poked him later.

He jumped moving feeling me lean over him kissing his cheek.

"Don't go to sleep."

"I did."

"I know, but what would it look like if the boss was seen laying around sleeping?"

He moved onto his back looking at me.

"How was your day, dear?" He asked

I smiled touching his hair.

"Boring, without you."

"You worked with Petersen didn't you?"

"Yes, why?"

"Well you did tell me he looks like me."

"It's not the same. He doesn't have your personality."

He pulled me down against his chest kissing me.

"When do you want to have a wedding?" He asked, as we moved apart.

"I think we should do a quick wedding."

"You mean at a chapel?"

"Yes." I said "But no Elvis."

The next week both shifts were busy. Grissom had a night off and we spent it at his place. I yawned as I watched him cook. He turned smiling at me as I smiled at him.

He set out our meals on the counter and we ate.

"After eating we are going to bed." He said

"But it's only six." I said, looking at my watch.

"I know, but you look exhausted."

"You don't have to go to bed to, besides I thought that movie was on tonight."

"I don't care about some movie. I care about you."

"Gris, I'll be fine. I want to watch the movie."

After dinner we sat on the couch to watch the movie. I stretched out on my stomach putting a pillow over Grissom's legs laying my head on it. He put his hand on my hair playing with it. As the credits rolled down the screen Grissom looked at his watch then he looked down at me sleeping on the pillow. Gently he moved and lowered my pillow on the couch putting a blanket over me then he went to work at his desk.

A frantic knock caused Grissom alarm an hour later. He stood looking over me then walked over to the door. Opening it he saw Sophia looking scared.

"Sophia?" He said "What's wrong?"

"Someone just tried to kill me!" She said, shaking.

"What?" He asked, pulling her inside.

"Gil, I was driving to a scene and someone drove along side of me and shot at my vehicle. I swerved and watched the car turn and come back. I ran as fast as I could and I don't know if I was followed." She said, almost sobbing "Why are people trying to kill me?"

Before Grissom could say anything she put her arms around him laying her head on his chest shivering. He slowly put his arms around her.

"It's all right. I'll call Brass."

"No, not yet." She said, raising her head to look at him "Gris, I feel so safe in your arms."

She kissed him slowly then drew back seeing me standing watching them.

"Oh." She said

Grissom turned seeing me. He stepped away from her as I stared.

"Sara, I didn't know you were here."

"No, you didn't." I said, coolly.

"I'll call Brass." Grissom said, walking away. I walked over looking at her as she followed Grissom with her eyes.

"Are you two working?" She asked

"No."

She nodded understanding. Grissom came back to us.

"Brass is coming. Sophia why don't you sit down and I'll get you something to drink?"

"Thank you." She said, going over to the couch. I watched her go then I looked at Grissom. He went to the kitchen to get a drink when I came in.

He poured a water into a glass then he looked at me.

"Something wrong?"

"You could say that."

"What is it?"

"She kissed you?"

"Sara."

"What? Let's not forget that she was involved with you not to long ago."

"Sara, you have nothing to worry about." He said, as he came over touching my cheek.

I slowly nodded as he dropped his hand from my cheek then he got the glass walking past me to the living room. I sighed taking a deep breath going out to join them. Sophia drank from the glass looking at Grissom who sat in a chair near the couch.

"Thanks for the water." She said, setting her glass down on the coffee table.

"I think I am going to bed." I said, getting up. I walked over kissing Grissom then I walked into the bedroom.

Tossing and turning half an hour later I got up opening the door to see Grissom and Sophia talking to Brass. Brass walked to the front door leaving Sophia and Grissom alone. Grissom walked Sophia to the door.

"Thanks for helping me." She said

"Not at all." Grissom said "I am just glad your all right."

She looked at the open door then at him.

"Grissom, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"What happened to us?"

He looked down then at her.

"It just would not work out."

"Why?" She asked, looking into his blue eyes.

"Sophia, I loved Sara long before I met you. I just never did anything about it, because I didn't know what to do."

"Sara." She said, looking down.

"She's the one I love. I am sorry."

"Hey, it wasn't like I didn't try."

He watched her leave. I quickly got back into his bed pretending to sleep. He came in looking at me. He sat on the bed reaching over touching my pale cheek. I moved opening my eyes looking at him.

"Is Sophia gone?"

"Yes." He said "Why don't you get dressed? We can go out and get married."

I sat up looking at him.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

I smiled jumping out of bed as he watched me.

Later we walked out of the wedding chapel hand in hand smiling at each other. When we got to his place I kissed him passionately before he could shut the door. He finally pushed it shut kissing me back. I pulled him to the bedroom.

In the morning I woke looking at time seeing I had two hours before work. Sighing I looked over at my husband of a few hours sleeping near me naked. I smiled as he moved opening his mouth as he stilled gently snoring.

When he woke I was gone. I walked through the hallway smiling as I looked down at my wedding ring Grissom bought last night. It was after eight and I was still working on the case in the layout room examining photos. Grissom walked by stopping as he saw me.

"Mrs. Grissom." He said, leaning against the door with a stack of papers in his hand.

"Mr. Grissom."

"It was a strange event this morning to find my wife gone."

"She had a good reason."

"Why aren't you headed home?" He asked, walking in.

"I decided to work late."

"Oh, so you are starting to do what you did to me to Petersen?"

"Your not making sense." I said

"You can finish this tomorrow."

"Nope."

"Sara."

I stretched to stand looking at him.

"I am this close to finding the person who did this. I want to stay." I said, looking at him.

"Well I am not your boss now. Just a concerned husband." He said, walking to the door.

"Gris?"

"Yeah?" He said, as he turned watching me walk over.

"I love the concerned husband in you. I think it's hot."

He chuckled looking out then at me.

"Flirting in the building is prohibited." He said

"Well then write me up." I said, kissing him.

Catherine walked over from the lounge seeing us kissing.

"Um Gil, are we going to get our assignments or do we wait until you are done kissing?"

Grissom looked over at her as I smiled going back to my table.

"I am coming."

She sighed leaving. He looked over at me winking then walked out. I watched him go feeling my heart flutter.

I walked out to my car later seeing a man walk over.

"Got a light?" He asked

"No." I said, as I got my keys out of my pocket.

"Your one of those CSI's aren't you?"

"Yeah, can I help you?"

"No." He said, watching me.

I started to get a bad feeling about this guy. He didn't move as he watched me. Footsteps came over from the building making me feel even more on edge.

"Sara, when you…." Grissom said, stopping as he saw the man standing nearby. "Can I help you?"

"No." He said

"What do you want here?" Grissom asked, as he walked over to stand in front of me.

"Nothing."

"Then I suggest you leave."

The man looked over at me then he quietly walked past. I watched him go then I looked at Grissom as he turned around.

"Who was that?"

" I don't know."

"Okay, I'll stay until you get in and drive away."

"Did you want something?"

"No, it's not important now."

He opened my door letting me inside. I kissed him then started my engine leaving. Grissom looked over seeing the man standing by the curb watching my car pull away. Grissom pulled out his cell phone calling Brass.

The next morning I was drinking coffee at the kitchen counter dressed for work when he came in from the front door.

"Hey." I said

"You ready to go?"

"Yeah."

"I'll take you."

"You just finished a shift. I can drive myself."

"I came home early so I could take you."

I smiled walking over to him.

"Is this about that jerk that was in the parking lot?"

"I just want you safe." He said

I kissed him pulling on his brown coat making him move closer. I moved away looking at him.

"I think your protective side is attractive, but as you know I am very capable to protecting myself. You didn't marry a weakling."

"I understand that, but I still would feel better if I took you."

I kissed him again then I touched his cheek.

"No."

He watched me walk past him to the door. As I drove I knew he was following me. I drove into the parking lot getting out looking over at his car sitting by the entrance of the lot. Smiling I walked inside.

I had just got out the photos I needed for work when Catherine ran over looking tired and frantic.

"Cath, what's wrong?" I asked, standing from my seat.

"Sara, Gil's been shot!"

I gasped looking at her. She drove me to the hospital and ran inside with me.

"How did this happen?" I asked, after taking a seat in the waiting room.

"He went home and some guy came over and shot him through the window. Grissom called me and I called 911."

"Some guy?"

"Yeah."

I looked down remembering the guy standing outside in the lot that he confronted. The doctor came out telling me that the bullet hit his arm and another nicked his head. He led me down the hallway to his room.

I walked over looking at the bandages on his arm and around his head. Tears went down my cheeks as I touched his hand.

He looked so pale as he slept. I sat down kissing his hand looking at him. Catherine came in walking over at the foot of the bed.

"How is he?" She asked

"The doctor said he'll be fine. He said he is very lucky to be alive. If he hadn't moved his head then…."

"He'll be okay, Sara." She said, coming over to touch my shoulder.

Grissom groaned faintly moving his head some. I stood looking at him squeezing his hand.

"Gris?"

He slowly opened his eyes seeing me.

"Sara?"

"Yeah, how do you feel?"

He closed his eyes opening them again as he centered on Catherine.

"Fine." He said "Hey, Cath."

"Hey, you look fine to me." She said, smiling.

He smiled faintly looking over at me.

"Honey, you look worried."

"I am worried about you." I said

"Sara, I am going to call Brass and the team."

"Okay, thanks."

She nodded looking at Grissom then at me before leaving. I sat on the bed rubbing his hand. He closed his eyes holding my hand.

Brass came in after Grissom begged me to leave and get something to eat hours later.

"Where is Sara?" He asked, looking around.

"I sent her to get something to eat."

"Good idea, Can you describe the guy that did this?"

"Yes, the guy I called you about out in the parking lot. Brown hair, blue eyes, five-nine in height. He had a diamond ear piercing in his right ear."

I came in seeing them talking. Brass looked at me then at Grissom.

"Take it easy."

"Thanks Jim."

He smiled turning touching my arm before leaving.

"Did you eat?"

"Yes." I said, coming over to him.

"Good."

I leaned down kissing him. I moved back laying my head on his chest.

"I love you, Grissom."

"I love you, Sara."

He touched my hair looking up at the ceiling.

He came to work a few weeks later with his arm still in a sling. He went to his office after greeting a few people along the way in the hallway. Picking up some unopened mail on his desk he looked at an envelope opening it to read the letter.

Catherine knocked on his door smiling at him.

"Your back."

"Yeah." He said, putting the letter down.

"Ready to work again?" She asked, coming in.

"You could say that." He said, pulling out his chair to sit. Catherine picked up the letter he was reading.

"A sabbatical to lecture on Forensic Science for six months."

He looked at her as she looked at him putting the letter down.

"Are you going to take it?"

"I don't know. I have always wanted to do lectures."

"When are you going to mention this to Sara?" She asked

"Cath, I just got the letter. There is nothing to talk about yet. Now shall we get to work?"

"Fine." She said, leaving. He picked up the letter again looking at it.

A few weeks later He came home just as I was on my way out the door. I kissed him rushing out leaving him to sleep. When shift was over I walked over to his office seeing him sitting at his desk already doing paperwork.

"You're here early." I said, walking in.

"I have to catch up on paperwork." He said, writing.

I looked at him touching his hair. He looked up at me.

"Something wrong?"

"No, I just needed to think."

"Okay."

He smiled as I leaned down kissing him then I walked out. He watched me leave then he looked down moving some papers to a form of registration to lecture. He signed it then put it in an envelope to send.

He came home early not seeing me. He came into the bedroom seeing me getting on my shoes. I smiled at him as he smiled back walking over he kissed me then moved back taking my hands.

"Sara, we need to talk."

A few minutes later he watched me sitting in the living room chair as he sat on the couch. I rubbed my hands together saying nothing.

"Well?" He asked

"Well what?"

"You must have something to say."

"If you want me to say I am happy for you I am not going to." I said, standing walking to the kitchen counter.

"I thought you would be okay with this." He said, standing walking over to me.

I turned looking at him.

"Okay? You knew about this for a while and yet you never said a thing to me."

"Sara."

"No, you go and I'll be fine." I said, walking to the door.

He sighed watching me leave. I sat in the lounge during shift thinking about him leaving as he sat at his desk thinking about me.

The day came for him to leave. I watched him pack as I sat on the bed. He said nothing as he packed. I got off the bed going to the couch in the living room. He came out with his suit case putting it by the door then he walked over to me.

"My flight leaves at three so I should go." He said

I stood walking over to him.

"Have a nice flight."

"Is that all?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I think so."

He kissed my cheek walking to the front door opening it he stopped turning to look at me.

"I'll miss you."

"Good." I said

He wanted to say more, but instead he grabbed his case leaving. I sighed looking down. I worked nonstop on cases while he was gone. As I walked through the hallway of CSI my phone went off. I picked it up seeing it was Grissom calling shutting it off I continued on my way.

Four months went by as Petersen watched me walk into his office looking sick with a cold. I gave him a report as I sat down rubbing my head.

"Case done?" He asked, as he looked at the paper.

"Yeah." I said

"Sara, why don't you go home?"

"I am ready for the next case."

"There aren't anymore. Go home and get some rest." He said, as his phone rang.

I stood feeling the aches in my body. I went to the door as Petersen answered.

"Sara?" He said

I turned around seeing him holding the phone standing.

"It's Grissom."

I walked over slowly taking the phone. He walked away leaving me to talk.

"Hello?" I said

"Why haven't you been calling me?" He asked

"I was busy." I said

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah." I said, rubbing my head.

"Sara?"

"I'm fine. I am going home."

"I'll call you later. Pick up the phone."

"I will."

Lying in bed I woke feeling head hot with fever. My phone went off beside me and I went to pick it up.

"Sidle." I said, before sneezing.

"Now the truth comes out. You were sick." Grissom said

"It's just a cold." I said, rolling over in bed "How is lecturing?"

"I find it more interesting then the people taking it."

I closed my eyes resting my hurting throat.

"Sara?"

"I'm here."

"I miss you." He said, as he looked around the hotel lobby.

"I miss you."

"I want you to call Catherine if you get worse."

"I will."

He hung up thinking a moment before walking away. I sneezed rolling over moaning as my head started to hurt. I walked into the kitchen after calling off the next day looking at an empty cup on the counter in the kitchen. I swallowed lifting my hand to take it when it crashed down on the floor breaking.

I slowly bent over to pick up the pieces when my legs gave out and I laid on the tiled floor. Catherine walked around the crime scene at the park when her cell rang out. Greg looked at her as he knelt down to pick up a piece of cloth on the ground.

"Willows." She said

"Cath, its Grissom. I need you to check on Sara."

"Gil, I am working at a scene. I will check on her after work."

"I need you to check now. I have been trying to call her and she won't answer."

"She's probably sleeping."

"I have a bad feeling. Either check on her now or I fly in."

She sighed looking at Greg.

"All right, I'll call you later." She said, hanging up "Greg, can you handle this?"

"Sure."

"I'll be back in an hour."

Catherine drove to the house. Knocking on the door for a few seconds. Getting the spare key she let herself in.

"Sara, its Catherine. Gil called me worried." She called, looking around as she closed the door. "Sara?"

She walked over to the bedroom not seeing me. Walking out she looked around walking into the kitchen seeing me lying on the floor next to a broken cup.

"Sara!" She called, kneeling down touching my hot head.

I didn't move as she got her phone calling 911. Opening my eyes I saw lights above as someone leaned over me touching my head and talking to me.

Later I woke again able to see better as I looked around realizing I was in a hospital room. Closing my eyes I lost track of time. A kiss on my head roused me as I opened my eyes seeing Grissom.

"Gris?"

"Hey." He said, smoothing my hair.

"Your lectures." I said, weakly.

"I quit to come here. I told them you were sick and I had to come home." He said "Sara, why didn't you call Catherine?"

"I didn't want you to worry."

"I was already worried before Cath called to tell me she found you unresponsive on the kitchen floor."

I watched his face change to concern as he looked deeply into my brown eyes.

"I'm sorry for not telling you about the sabbatical." He said "I just thought you wouldn't mind if I went."

"Your my husband. I don't want to hold you down. I was hurt that you seemed to want to get away from me."

"I didn't want to get away from you. I love you."

I swallowed taking his hand in mine holding it.

"I am staying here until you get better."

"What about work?"

"I put in some time. I am staying home to help you get better."

After a few days I came home for complete rest. Grissom read to me in bed and made meals for us. He did everything so I didn't lift a finger. We sat watching TV one evening as he massaged my feet in his lap as I lay against the pillow cushions.

"The news isn't as gruesome as it used to be." I said

"That isn't gruesome?" He said, motioning to the news.

"Okay that is, but it's not the same."

He shook his head as he stopped massaging. I looked at him watching him move over behind me lying down.

"I am not interested in the news just now." He said, kissing my neck. I moved lying on my back kissing him. He looked down at me searching my face.

"Your giving me that look." I said, smiling.

"What look?"

"That I want to have an early night look."

"I didn't know I had a look."

"You do."

"What do you think?"

"I think that would be nice, but I am to weak to move."

"I could carry you."

"Okay."

He got up picking me up taking me in the bedroom. He moved in bed later sighing as he watched me move to my side facing him. I smiled relaxed reaching over touching his hands between us.

"I talked to Ecklie about reinstating you back to night shift."

"Gris, we talked about that."

"I want you back."

"I am better off where I am."

"He said you could come back."

"He did not."

"He did."

I looked at our hands gliding over each other's.

"Sara, I need you back."

I came back to work stopping by Petersen's office as he was coming out.

"Oh Sara."

"Hi, I just came to…."

"Talk to me about moving to night shift." He said

"How did you know that?"

"Grissom." He said, shrugging his shoulders.

"Of course." I said

"I have a form for you to sign and then you can go."

"No, I want to stay." I said

"Are you sure? Grissom told me you wanted to move."

"I am sure."

"Okay." He said

I walked over to Grissom's office seeing him talking to Warrick after shift was over. I crossed my arms looking at him. He looked over at me then talked to Warrick. Warrick walked over past me waving at me.

"Something wrong?" He asked, looking at me up and down.

"You talked to Petersen?"

"Yes. Was that wrong?"

"Yes, you went in there and said I was going to go to night shift."

"We talked about it." He said, walking over to me.

"I said no."

"Sara, I told you I wanted you back." He said, reaching up touching my face "I need you."

I moved closer to him.

"We are shorthanded and I don't want anyone but you."

"If you really want me then I will."

"I do want you."

I signed the paper and moved back to night shift. I got used to the time difference and was happy to be back with my old coworkers. Greg and I went in the Los Vegas hotel and casino on a case. We went up on the elevator to floor eleven to room 1105. Brass stood outside in the hallway waiting for us.

"Good to see you back, Sara." He said

I smiled looking inside the room.

"Dead male on the bed. It's a mess. It looks like he was hit over and over with a hammer."

I grimaced as Greg went in first looking at the blood spatter on the walls and bed.

"Wow." Greg said, as he looked around.

"Yeah."

We went over the room as the body was taken out.

"Well at least we know what he was doing here." I said, lifting up a used condom with tweezers from underneath the bed.

"Wild date." Greg said, as he took a picture.

"I cannot believe a woman could use this much force to hit with." I said, looking around.

"Maybe she was a he."

"That would make sense."

"We will know soon." He said

I returned with him later at the building when a man walked over to us.

"Excuse me….did you just come from the Los Vegas Hotel?"

I looked at Greg as he looked at the man.

"Yeah, who are you?"

"I know who killed that man."

He looked around nervously.

"What's your name?" I asked

"James Dugan."

"Mr. Dugan, why don't you come with us and we can talk?" Greg said

He followed us inside. I left to give the evidence to the lab then I went to the interrogation room that Greg put the man in. Brass came in next as I sat down beside Greg.

"I stayed in the room next door and I heard some yelling coming from next door."

"What time was this?" Brass asked

"About one."

"Where were you when I came by to ask you some questions?"

"I went out."

"Where?" Brass asked

"Down to the casino at about two."

"What happened after you heard yelling?" I asked

"I looked out through my peep hole and saw a man and a woman going to the elevator. The woman looked like she was in a daze and the man didn't seem affected by anything."

"What was he wearing?" Brass asked

"Blue jeans and a red flannel shirt. She was defiantly a hooker wearing a silver dress, no shoes."

"What time was this?"

"1:20."

A knock at the door caused us to look over. Grissom opened the door looking at us all then at Brass.

"Jim."

"Right." He said, going. I looked at Greg as he looked at me.

"Are we done?" The man asked

"The shooter must have just missed Sara and Greg." Brass said

"Yeah, twenty six dead."

"Any of the victims wearing a red flannel shirt or a silver dress?"

"I'll let you know. You better tell Sara and Greg." Grissom said, before walking away.

I walked in the hallway seeing Grissom walking with the sheriff talking as they walked to the hallway that led the police station. Sighing, I went to trace and then to one of the empty rooms to set out evidence with Greg.

Grissom came home seeing me sleeping on the couch with my arm hanging off it. He stood there watching me as he smiled then he went to his desk.

The next shift I was with Greg working on the case when Catherine came in.

"Hey, Grissom want's us all to be in the meeting room."

We all walked in taking a seat with Warrick and Sophia. Nick came in with Brass. Grissom came in holding a file which he put on the table.

"Okay, I asked you all in here because we have a situation. As of right now everyone not working on the Los Vegas Hotel shooting and murder is to be working it. Catherine I want you to make a team with some of the new recruits as I will. Sara and Greg will be with me as we try to work on the murder. I have been working with Archie to find any evidence of the man with the red flannel shirt and the woman. Nothing as yet has been found which leads me to suspect that Mr. Dugan was lying. We have his address so Sara and Greg I want you to go with Brass and pick him up."

We walked with Brass and some officers to Dugan's house. We walked up the drive way as a gun went off breaking the window on the house. We all ducked behind the car in the driveway as bullets flew past. Brass shot a few times as we did.

The gun went off again hitting the car.

"If he hits the gas tank this car will blow!" Brass shouted.

We all shot again as he did. Brass motioned for the two officers to distract the man in the house by going in the back and entering the house.

We shot again waiting as they crept in the back yard. The shots stopped as Brass ran over with us and kicked open the door going in. Dugan looked at the cops surrounding him as he held the gun.

"Put it down, Dugan." Brass said

He slowly lowered the gun to the floor putting his hands up. Greg and I watched Brass take him out the door in handcuffs to the patrol car. We went inside looking around the house. Coming back to the lab Grissom walked over as we entered.

"Good job on catching Dugan." He said

"Thank's." Greg said

"Brass called and said that Dugan had accomplices."

"Great." I said

"I want you to go over the evidence."

Greg started walking as I did.

"Sara." Grissom called "Can I see you a moment?"

"Sure." I said "I'll be there in a moment."

Greg nodded going as I followed Grissom to his office. He waited for me to come in and put his hands on my cheeks.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes, I am fine." I said, smiling.

He kissed my head looking at me. Catherine came in stopping.

"Oh, Grissom you should warn us first when your in here with Sara."

He let me go sighing.

"I was acquiring about Sara's wellbeing."

"Okay, whatever you call it. I was wondering if you could come with me."

"All right." He said

I watched them go smiling I walked out.

Dugan was not talking about the others that he had help him. He told us that he killed the man in the next room because of money. We all worked long hours trying to find evidence to find his accomplices.

I came home yawning before I opened the door. Grissom came in ten minutes later. He came into the bedroom not seeing me. Going to the bathroom door he knocked.

"Sara?"

"Yeah." I said, as I flushed the toilet after throwing up.

"You okay?" He asked, as I opened the door.

"Yeah, I just felt sick."

He touched my head.

"Your not hot."

"I am going to bed."

He laid beside me holding me.

"Maybe you should see the doctor."

"I feel better it's just a bug."

"If it gets worse you need to see the doctor."

I sighed closing my eyes enjoying his arm around me. The next shift we worked hard again. As I walked down the hallway I smelled pizza from the meeting room as we all were getting ready to report our findings. I sat down next to Greg as Catherine opened the first box of pizza getting a slice. I felt sick just smelling it.

"Sara, want some?" She asked

"No."

Grissom came talking to everyone as they ate. I reported our findings then I fidgeted in my seat feeling my stomach rolling over. I stood up seeing everyone looking at me.

"Excuse me." I said, putting my hand to my mouth. They all watched me run out in the hallway.

"Cath, would you?" Grissom asked

"Sure." She said, getting up to go out and find me. She entered the bathroom seeing me throwing up in a stall. She walked over touching my back as I convulsed throwing up again. I finished going to the sink.

"Sara, are you okay?"

"Yeah." I said, splashing water on my face.

"I think you should see a doctor."

"When the case is over I will."

"No, you need to go now. Gil would agree with me."

I took a breath trying to quiet my stomach. Catherine walked me out seeing Grissom standing outside waiting for us.

"Are you all right?" He asked, touching my head.

"I am okay. I think I'll go to the doctor."

"I'll go to." Grissom said

"No, you should stay here." I said

"Catherine can cover for me."

"Go on." Catherine said

Grissom and I went to the doctors and they took my blood running test. I waited with him in the waiting room nervous.

Grissom calmly looked at people as I looked down trying not to think about what could be wrong with me. The doctor came out asking us into his office. We sat in front of the doctor's desk as he opened my file.

"Sara, your test came back negative, except for one thing."

I looked at Grissom as he looked at the doctor.

"What is the matter?" He asked

"Sara, your going to have a baby." He said, smiling.

I gasped sitting back in my chair.

"A baby?" Grissom said

"Yes, congratulations. I'll leave you two so you can talk." He said, leaving.

I sat looking down in shock as Grissom stood walking around the room. I snapped out of it looking at him.

"Say something." I said

"I'm to old."

"What?" I said

"Sara, people have babies when they are young. I am in my fifties and it's not fair to have to raise children then."

"You think I planned this?"

"No, that's not what I am saying. I just…..I don't know." He said, looking down.

"Grissom, I never planned on being a mother. I never wanted to after the childhood I had, but it's happened and we just have to accept it."

He sighed rubbing his face. I looked down waiting for him to speak.

"All right."

"All right?" I said, looking at him. He came over to me touching my arm.

"I accept it."

Moving closer I kissed him. He pulled me to him.

Grissom took to my pregnancy as people around us congratulated him at work. He made the meals at home and made sure that I had plenty of rest.

Four months later it was no secret that I was having a baby. As I walked around the building people smiled at me often stopping to talk about the baby.

One day we were waiting for our assignments. I ate an apple as I sat down on the couch. Nick joked with Warrick as Sophia talked to Catherine about a past case. Grissom came in with a pile of papers.

He handed out the assignments watching every one go out. I stood still eating walking over to him.

"You forgot me."

"No I didn't. I want you to work on an old case. The district attorney wants us to look into a case that was reopened."

"Is this your way of keeping me out of the field?" I asked

"Sara, I am not trying to stop you from working out in the field."

"Mmmhmm."

He shook his head walking out. I looked at the evidence in a room. As I slowly rubbed my protruding stomach I looked at some photos taken of the crime scene. The bloody knife caught my attention on one of the photos. I took out the knife from the box looking at the brand on the handle.

Grissom was walking with Sophia down the hallway I ran over bumping into them.

"It's the wrong knife!" I said

"What?" Grissom asked, as Sophia and he stopped looking at me.

"The knife that was used in that triple homicide, it's the wrong one."

"How do you know that?" He asked

"It's the same kind of knife except the murder weapon had a nick on the handle. The murder must have smeared the blood on fake one and then taken the real one."

"Why do that?" Sophia asked

Grissom looked at her thinking.

"Maybe there was something different about the knife. In some cases the murderer likes to keep a memento. In this case the real weapon."

"We could have a serial killer in town." I said

Grissom looked at me.

"Sara, try as hard as you can to find some prints on the knife."

"Yes, boss." I said, going back to the room.

I dusted the knife finding one print which I put in CODIS. Grissom came in to see what match was coming up. I looked at the computer waiting.

"You know if this does come out differently we might have the wrong guy in jail."

"I know." He said

The result came back saying that it was a 100% match to a man named Frank Berry. A convict off on probation. I gave the printed out paper to Grissom. He looked at it getting out his phone sighing.

"Brass, its Grissom. We have the results. It's not the husband….It's Frank Berry."

I watched him go out.

I laid against Grissom on the couch as he read a hand on my stomach. I looked at the walls and the ceiling thinking about the baby's room. Grissom put down his book kissing my head.

"You awake?"

"Yeah, I was thinking about the baby's room."

"Sara, I think we should find out the sex."

"I told you I wanted to be surprised."

"I know, but wouldn't it be better if before we decorate the baby's room we find out what it is going to be?"

"No, I want to wait. We can decorate it without knowing."

"All right, I think we should go to bed." He said, helping me up.

Grissom went into interrogation with the husband and his lawyer telling them the news. The husband took it as was expected smugly looking at Brass and Grissom as his lawyer yelled. We got lucky finding Frank Berry who led the police in a twenty mile chase back to his dwelling which was a shrine to all he killed with the murder weapons all around the walls like trophies.

My seventh month came and with that I had to take off work as was Grissom's orders. I laid around the house watching TV and eating ice cream and other things. Grissom was making dinner in the kitchen in my ninth when he heard me cry out. Coming out into the living room he saw me hunched over the chair with one hand on my stomach and the other clutching the chair.

"Sara?"

"It's time!" I yelled

He quickly got the phone calling for an ambulance. I was wheeled into a room where the doctor checked me. Grissom came in wearing green scrubs holding my hand. I winched as another contraction came.

"Owe!" I yelled

"Sara, this baby is ready to come out. One big push should do it." The doctor said

I took a breath then I pushed feeling the pressure as the baby slid out. Collapsing back on the bed I watched Grissom as he looked over watching the doctor. A cry made us jump as the baby moved in the doctors arms.

"You have a son." He announced, giving the baby to the nurse.

"We have a boy." I said

Grissom kissed me then reached out taking his child in his arms. He showed him to me as I reached up touching his little hand.

"He looks like you." I said

"He has your nose." Grissom said

We both smiled at each other as our new life wriggled around in Grissom's arms.