White Flag

Soundtrack: White Flag by Dido.

A/N: AU where Wulfgar didn't die, and Cattie-brie married him, much to her regret. Drizzt also married, accepting that Cattie-brie had chosen another. Years later Wulfgar was killed, leaving Cattie feeling both terrified and free. This is a one-shot of an encounter with Drizzt, who moved on romantically, but his love never faltered.

Disclaimer: R.A. Salvatore and a whole bunch of people who aren't me own Forgotten Realms.

"Oh Drizzt, I was so foolish. There were warning signs; I ignored them…"

"Shh, dear Cattie. It's okay – you're okay now. He cannot hurt you anymore." Comfort and security surrounded her by way of his arms.

Anger held captive within the elf, threatening futile escape.

Questions were scattered in emotion. How could she keep this from him? Surely she knew he would not have stood idly by. His anger changed focus, setting himself as the target. He should have stopped her before that creature touched her…

Then there was the time by the river. Drizzt had been on a picnic with his family when Cattie-brie happened by. Of course they had invited her to join them. Something seemed off – her lack of laughter, the way her eyes never met his.

Looking back, he realized she had hardly uttered two sentences in his direction. He should have known it was more than lack of sleep. He could have figured it out, had she given him even the slightest indication. Drizzt looked down at this precious soul, so near the breaking point. Were that monster not dead, he would soon wish he were…

As though she were privy to the chaos that was occupying his subconscious, she spoke to him softly. "You know that I could never have told you. You care too much."

What was that to mean? That she was embarrassed? Or was she scared of the very thoughts that boiled within him? For now, all that could wait. He would do whatever he could to undo the damage, or at least be a shoulder to lean on. Unworthy though he be, he would not abandon her again.

Some years later…

"It has to be like this, I cannot ignore these feelings. I cannot be satisfied with reality. I am made for more; I have to believe it. My life has greater purpose – I feel it! I will not compromise. I want more. I need more."

"But what you are suggesting, leaving Faerûn – you know I cannot follow. It means goodbye…"

"Oh Drizzt, were it up to me, I would not be alone. Ours is not always to understand, rather to trust Mielikki, who guides us. I cannot – no, I will not, delay longer. It is time."

"Will I see you again?" His heart was shattering, reality sickening his stomach.

"I know not, though I must not linger. The past threatens to drag me under, to challenge my resolve. Surely you understand..."

"How can you just cast our friendship, cast me, aside so easily? Do you not know what you mean to me? If anything ever happened to you, if you ever needed me, how could I forgive myself? I wasn't there when he nearly destroyed all that was good and gentle in you. I cannot forgive myself for that, let alone anything else! Sleep will be elusive, concern shall be my blanket."

Her face was set like stone. "It is time, I must not tarry."

"Go on then, leave! If you hate me so much, then let me make it easier: You are no longer welcome here." Drizzt abruptly turned, knowing that she would easily see the pain in his eyes.

"Fine! Do not come looking for me either. My name and appearance shall be such that even you will not recognize me."

Drizzt started back home, back to his family. Back to the one who chose him, who stayed when so many had left. He knew that Cattie wasn't just leaving for herself, or for want of adventure. She was also leaving for Drizzt – and those who waited for him. Honor and love, these pulled her away only barely stronger then the pull of her companionship with the elf noir. It hurt him to walk away from one who had been his close comrade. He longed to wake up from this nightmare. He must not waver, for Cattie needed him in a different way. It pained him to talk to her like that. It was a lie. He would always be there, if she needed him. Now, that meant throwing lamp oil on the bridge that was smoldering. He would go down with the ship.