He could see his best friend's face so clearly. He could count the 21 freckles that danced across his cheeks. His chestnut eyes were full of hope and innocence. He always knew the right things to say.
"Don't worry, Jean, it's not so bad up here. Franz keeps me company. Please keep fighting, Jean. I know you can do it. You're a leader, Jean. You always have been. Please don't give up. I don't want to see you up here for a very long time, okay?"
The young man sat upright in bed. His elbows rested on his thighs, his head buried in his hands. Tears streamed down his face, rolled down his hands and created dark splotches on his blanket. His body convulsed. He would spend another night sobbing instead of sleeping.
It had been just over a month since the loss of his best friend, Marco. Things within the walls had finally quieted down, giving Jean the time to finally grieve. He had discovered Marco's corpse. No one had seen him perish. As far as he knew, no one had even tried to help him. He kept imagining how scared Marco must have been in his final moments. He kept thinking that it should have been him who died, not Marco. It was hard for Jean to keep going without him. Marco was everything he had, and now he had nothing.
Jean and his fellow comrades had finally been given the orders they all knew were coming. The Scouting Legion was going back outside the walls. The goal was to once again find a route to the Shiganshina District. The troop still needed to get to Eren's basement because there was a good chance that the secret to the Titans would be there. No one had any definitive proof though. A wasted effort, in Jean's opinion. But that didn't matter. They were to set out in the morning.
The following morning, the Scouting Legion was in formation and fully prepared to leave the safety of the walls. The gates opened and the legion departed. An hour or so passed and there were no signs of trouble. So far so good. Jean was positioned in the back left of the formation with two other comrades. They were travelling through a flat field, useless for the use of maneuver gear if a Titan was to appear. But he got through it once before, so Jean tried to think nothing of it.
More time had passed and still no sightings of any Titans. The trio rode in silence, only listening to the galloping of the horses. Jean sighed and looked up at the sky. Are you there, Marco? I miss you, you know. I can't wait to see you again, even though I know that that means I'll have to die.
"Jean, get a smoke signal ready!" his comrade's voice slammed Jean back into reality. He had zoned out so much that he failed to notice the aberrant Titan that was closing in on them. He struggled to get the signal gun from his side.
"Shit," Jean yelled, dropping the signal. Luckily his comrade was able to get his ready and fired a signal into the air. The Titan was closing in and Jean knew that they couldn't outrun it forever. They were going to have to fight, but with the lack of trees in the vicinity, maneuver gear was impractical.
Jean's comrades were prepared for this, however. They knew that if they could attach their gear to the Titan itself, they would have shot at defeating it before it got any closer to the rest of the formation. The two troops attacked from both sides. The Titan saw this coming and grabbed the two men in mid air and smashed them into each other. Jean looked behind him when he heard the sounds of their bodies being crushed. His face drained of color.
This is it, he thought to himself. Jean isn't stupid, he knows that he's no match for an aberrant by himself. His horse will tire before he can get far enough away from the Titan. He jumps off of his horse and rolls on the ground. He stands up and stays still. The Titan is approximately a hundred feet in front of him and is closing in fast. The Titan slows and stops only a few feet in front of Jean. He's scared but tries to keep his body from shaking. The Titan begins to reach for Jean but he does nothing to evade. The Titan grabs Jean's body and squeezes him tightly. Jean feels his ribs start to break. He watches as his body is brought up to the Titan's mouth. He closes his eyes, he can't bear to watch, even though he did nothing to try and help himself. Tears start to form at the corner of his eyes.
I'll see you soon, Marco.