I had just been going through and rereading the Maximum Ride books, and I noticed what had always bothered me about the FAX stuff: they have too much going on. I mean, really, how many people (or avians, in this case) would have time to worry about kissing someone when they're being chased by evil scientists that work at a sadist lab, their robot/mutant henchman, and you are just 14?????

Therefore, this story takes place when Iggy, Fang, and Max are all 18, Nudge is 15, Gazzy 12, and Angel is 10. A Woman also ignores any romance, other than foreshadowing, that happened in the books. (I felt like I had to answer those question before the story.)

Maximum Ride & company all belong to James Patterson... of course. Enjoy!

Maximum Ride: A Woman


"You are going to be beaten, you know that right?"

Rain poured down from the dark gray sky. Hitting the roof it slides down the slant until it splashes, almost overflowing into the gutter. One red leaf follows the drenching flow as it rushes along then dumps out from a breach in the metal vein to go plunging, drawn by gravity, to earth.

The water's peaceful fall to earth was doomed when the first drop fell, however, as it was abruptly stopped by the black-locked head of a elder teenager. Long, wet tan-streaked bangs were shoved out of the eyes of the disgruntled boy as the rest of the black mass just flopped right back down.

Ringing laughter met the idle threat, "What kind of beating am I going to get, oh master?"

As the scowl, blank but a scowl none-the-less, descended on the tanned boy's face as he just glared at the humored blonde from his perch on the ground. When she started to laugh all the harder, he started to have a tough time not joining her because despite the fact the laughter was at his expense, Max was still laughing. Fang couldn't help it he grinned at the welcome sight.

Still, he felt the prank had been a tad bit unfair. She was safely sheltered beneath the roof which extended over the porch. He had been as well, previously, but the damn woman had sneaked up on him when he was sitting on the railing.

'Wait a minute... WOMAN?????' The grin abruptly turned into a blank mask as he got confused with himself. 'Did I seriously just call Max a WOMAN. She is not, she's just a girl.'

Despite his inner turmoil, Fang still did a double-check as Max gazed past him into the trees. High cheekbones defined a strong face that swept down into a delicate, but insanely stubborn chin. The soft brown eyes that could turn hard in an instant when danger came were framed by dark-but-not-quite-black eyelashes. The nose was probably the only part of Max that Fang could dare call cute in the bunnies and butterflies type of way. He couldn't describe how that worked out, it just did.

The pink-streaked blonde hair had long out grown the bright strips of color, but the style could still be seen. Brownish blonde was cut in sort-of ragged layers with sweeping side bangs that now went past the woman's cheekbones. All-in-all the hair hung in small waves to her collarbones.

'Damn it!' Fang cursed, 'I just called her a WOMAN for the second time in about five minutes! What is wrong with me?!'

"Fang? Fang? FANG!!"

"What?!" He snapped at Max, before realizing that, while in his daze, Max had gone back in the house and it was now Iggy standing there staring at the spot where he heard Fangs voice come from.

"Weeeell, I was going to ask if you had bathed for long enough, and wanted to come eat with the rest of us... normal avians, but, if you just want to sit there and moon over Max some more, well that's just fine with me." Fang just stared at the boy as if he was some insane person who blew things up for fun... 'Oh, wait, he is... huh'.

With the minor revelation on Fang's part about Iggy and insanity, he did a mental shrug and stood up, grimacing at his now soaked clothes. He sighed, figuring he would now have to change, and stepped up into the dry shelter. Contemplating Iggy's still smirking face and the teasing glint that refused to leave the redhead's eyes, he snickered suddenly.

The grin turned into a nervous twist very quickly as Iggy, all to knowing on the matters of pranks, asked, "Fang... what are you planning now?" Iggy's eyes turned almost frantic as the darker boy's snickers just escalated, then his blur orbs widened as he felt water spray him from head to foot, getting muddy splotches all over him.

"FANG!!!"

The roar of protest from the crazy redhead made Fang stop and look up from head shake. The half annoyed, half amused look that Iggy was giving him made him break down into hysterical laughs as the rest of the taller male's appearance came into focus.

Straight strawberry-blonde hair was now dripping in front and water slid down from then onto the twisted face and fell off the pointed chin. The previously spotless bright green of Iggy's shirt was now splattered with a bit of mud and a lot of water, as were his jeans.

"That was not very nice, you know."

"Yeah, I know." The brotherly moment was disrupted by an exclamation from inside the house and the two, now legal, eighteen-year-olds peered in the door.

"God, Gazzy! Give it back!!"Angel's wail carried through the door and both Iggy and Fang turned to each other with raised eyebrows, and then started laughing with each other all over again.

Yet, despite the many humors that now were presented as distractions for Fang, he couldn't help but still dwell over the fact that Max was quite a beautiful woman now... 'I did NOT just think that.'

Hope it was funny, Please Review!

Keep On Reading!
~The Flying Camster