Squirrelflight's issue.
Squirrelflight opens the door
Squirrelflight: Ahh, Leafpool! You've finally arrived! Come in, sis.
Leafpool: So, I hear you are having problems with the triplets? I'm here to observe, so we can fix what is wrong with them.
(Jaypaw streaks by in a tutu)
Jaypaw (screaming): I'm a Barbie girl, In a Barbie wooooorld!!!!!!!!!!
Squirreflight: See?
(Jaypaw rams into the wall)
Jaypaw: Wahhhhh! I'm so blind and helpless and everyone treats me differently! Wahhhhh!
Squirrelflight: Oh dear! Are you okay sweetie? Let me get you some ice.
Jaypaw (spitting): Jesus, you piece of foxdung! I can take care of my self! You don't have to be like that just because I'm blind!
(Jaypaw storms up the stairs)
Leafpool: Well we've seen young Jaypaw, what about the others?
Squirrelflight: I think Lionpaw is in the kitchen.
(Leafpool follows Squirrelflight into a tiled room)
Squirrelflight: Lionpaw! Are you in here?
(A muffled voice is heard from under the sink)
Leafpool: What is he doing under there?
Squirrelflight: Don't ask me.
(Leafpool opens the cabinet to find Lionpaw curled up in a tight ball)
Lionpaw: Gahhh! The sunlight! It burns::twitches uncontrollably::
Leafpool: What the?
Squirrelflight: Yea, this happens a lot
(Lionpaw's eyes grow wide and his body shakes onto the tiled floor, foam flopping from his mouth)
Lionpaw: M-musst…. impress heaatheerrpaww-- ::Leaps in the air and starts barking::
Leafpool::watches Lionpaw bark and growl at her feet, his eyes rolled back into his head:: Umm….. I think its time we visited Hollypaw…. ::backs away slowly::
Squirrelflight::looks around nervously:: Uhh, maybe you should see Brambleclaw first.
Leafpool: Okay::turns to see Brambleclaw sitting on the recliner, his belly fat hanging over the sides::
Squirrelflight: He's really let himself go… Sometimes I wish I'd chosen Ashfur.
Leafpool: Ahhhh! The fatness! It burnnnssss!!!
Squirrelflight::smacks Leafpool across the face:: Hey! Don't judge people! It's not nice….
Leafpool: Oh yea! Just like how you didn't judge Hawkfrost!
Squirrelflight: Wait a minute! You said you didn't trust him either! And we were right, he ended up evil. DUHHH!
Leafpool: Yea well…. You suck!
Squirrelflight: Whoa Whoa, back up sister! At least I'm not a little beep. First Crowfeather. And don't think I didn't see you warming up to Thornclaw the other day
Leafpool: Excuse me::thwomps Squirrelflight over the head with a stiff rabbit::
Squirrelflight: Oh no you did-ent::takes out heavy duty chainsaw::
Hollypaw::walks in the room:: Ah, omsc! What are you guys totally doing?
Leafpool::mouth hung in horror:: You let her dye her fur?!?
Squirrelflight: I didn't let her, she did it on her own!
Leafpool: WTF?!?!? She's PINK!! She looks like a watermelon!
Hollypaw: Are you, like, calling me fat?
Leafpool: And why is she talking like that?
Squirrelflight: Don't ask me!
(Jaypaw runs by in a cheerleading costume)
Jaypaw: Gimmie an L!
Hollypaw: L!
Jaypaw: Gimmie an E!
Hollypaw: E!
Jaypaw: Gimmie a Leafpool is actually my mother, Crowfeather is actually my father and StarClan has lied to us all!
Brambleclaw: WHAT!?!?!?!?!?!
Squirrelflight: No, honey, I can explain!
Brambleclaw: Oh and I bet now you're gonna tell me that none of these kits are mine and they're actually Stormfur's!
Squirrelflight::looks about anxiously:: Uhhh….. Of course not!
Leafpool: And I'm the beep?
Brambleclaw: That's it Squirrelflight! I'm leaving you::jumps out window::
Hollypaw: Did dad just, like, fly?
Squirrelflight: What just happened? Leafpool, you were supposed to come over here to help with out problems, not make them worse!
Leafpool: pssshhh, you actually think I would help you? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA that's hilarious!
Lionpaw: GAHHH!!!! THE LIGHT! SOMEBODY TAPE UP THE WINDOWS!!! GAHHHHHH ::in and out of the room with his paws over his eyes::
Leafpool: Okay lets see…. Jaypaw is gender-confused and blind, Hollypaw is now pink and really annoying, and Lionpaw seems to be a rabid vampire gopher-fish with an obsession.
Authors Note: I was extremely bored, so I wrote this. I liked writing it though! I hope you enjoyed reading. I'll prolly make some more later if I'm bored enough.
