DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU'VE FINISHED MOCKINGJAY. Unless you want this part to be spoiled for you.
Disclaimer: I am not Suzanne Collins. All rights go to her!
A/N: This is Mockingjay as Gale is giving Katniss the arrow that's supposed to kill Snow. I know that it was never directly said who was associated with killing Prim, but I personally think that it was Gale and the rebel's bomb. Which is why I think Gale left for District 2. Anyways, enjoy!
"Can I have a minute?" I lean against the doorway, clutching the sheath tightly in my hands. I meet her gaze in the reflection of the mirror. Her eyes are hollow and distraught. A question pops up into my head for the hundredth time today; what have I done?
As I make my way towards Katniss, I see she's staring blankly off at a small point in the mirror, not really looking at anything, but still seeing. Thinking. I can tell she's it's of Prim. My stomach lurches because I remember. I briefly consider turning around and going back, but I can't. I have to talk to her. I have to give her the arrow. I steel myself and approach her quietly, almost frightened that with one wrong move, she'll send an arrow through my heart.
"I brought you this." I say carefully," it's supposed to be symbolic. You're firing the last shot of war."
There's a pause. Then she says, "what if I miss?" Honestly, I'm surprised to hear her reply. At least she's talking to me. "Does Coin retrieve it and bring it back to me?" Sarcasm, "or just shoot Snow through the head herself?"
She's the best archer in all of Panem. "You won't," I assure her.
There's another long pause until she finally says, "You didn't come see me in the hospital." I translate that into: you didn't visit me because you know you killed my sister. And that's right, at least partially. I couldn't bear to see her in the hospital. Not after what happened to Prim. I guess I may as well admit that I was also scared. Scared of her reaction. Scared that'd I'd fall deep into the scar I created on her.
"Was it your bomb?" she asks in a low voice. I can't meet her eyes because I know it was.
Instead, I lie. "I don't know. Neither does Beetee." But in truth, it was Beetee who confirmed that it was our doing. That it was my fault. My fault.
I can feel her intense stare, drilling a hole right through me. My heart speeds up as I'm reminded again of what I've done. I stare at the ground, trying to block out the image of Prim catching fire. The ugly image of her burnt and mutilated on the ground. I should have warned her. Or told her to stay back. She should have stayed in District 13. But it's too late now, it's too late for anything.
From the corner of my eye, I see Katniss clench her fists. Tight. Does she plan on attacking me? I hope she does. I hope she kills me now so I don't have to deal with the pain anymore. Loosing Prim means loosing Katniss. I had one task and that was to keep her family alive and I have failed tediously. Anything that could have been, gone. Nothing can ever repair us. To Katniss, I will always be the boy who killed her sister.
I killed the one thing that Katniss loved unconditionally. All the good memories we had together; hunting in the woods, kissing, trading at the Hob, they're no longer there. They're useless. Even if she was even considering choosing me over Mellark, there's no way now. I did the unthinkable, not on purpose, but still, it happened. Primrose Everdeen is dead and it's all because of me
I don't know who I hate more, President Snow or myself.
"Does it matter?" I finally say. I'm hoping that she'll say no. That she'll convince herself that it was President Snow who sent the bombs, that it wasn't Coin and the rebels and I. But I know that no matter what I say, she'll never believe me. "You'll always be thinking about it."
I know from the silence that follows that it's over between us. No amount of 'I'm sorrys' can ever fix this.
"The one thing I had going was to take care of your family." I murmur. Katniss meets my eyes for a second and I have to look away. The guilt gnaws away at my heart. What have I done? "Shoot straight, okay?" And maybe once your done, you can come back and kill me too. It would be better for both of us if I was dead, too.
I touch her cheek one last time. Her skin is warm. I hesitate a moment before I walk away. I want her to hug me, to kiss me, to tell me that she forgives me and that everything will work itself out. I want her to tell me that maybe I didn't' completely blow it.
But I did. I know I did. And there's no turning back now because it's too late.
A/N: Sorry it's so short. I don't know why, but I can never write long fanfic. ConCrit? Review?