She doesn't know.
She barely knew.
She hardly knows.
Well, first. Let's start with this.
PAST:
She met a guy in her school.
She liked him. ALOT.
She tried to know him. She can't
She's low with boys.
So she waited.
Until the day came, she saw him again.
She asked her classmate his name.
When she knew, she smiled.
She was in love again.
She hated that feeling.
She wanted to forget about him.
But she fell for him. Because she knew his name.
She told her best friend about it.
Her best friend got excited about it and told her about her new crush too.
Then, she opened her computer, opened a social networking site, and searched his name, and added him.
And that was the day she regretted EVERYTHING.
When she saw him online, she can't wait to talk to him.
And she did.
They became chat buddies.
They talked until 10 pm.
In school, she was so excited to tell her best friend. She was so happy for her.
She tried to look for him in school, but when she locked eyes with him, she looked away, feeling so silly.
She asked her best friend about her new crush, she told her she wants to talk to him too.
The weekdays ended.
She started chatting to him again.
She asked who his crush is.
He answered another girl
She didn't feel pain. But she hoped.
Then her best friend chatted her, telling her she doesn't like her new crush anymore.
She told her best friend to help he rout with her crush.
So she did.
The next day was a blur.
She asked her best friend about their talk.
She realized they became close.
And the most painful thing, they started teasing each other in school.
She felt a little jealousy because her best friend can talk to him personally, but she can't.
She tried to let out her feeling of jealousy. And she felt fine.
Days passed, she noticed they became even closer.
She tried to talk to him in person, but she didn't have the strength.
Then, her best friend told her something she didn't want to hear.
Her best friend told her she liked him.
She cried inside. Feeling depressed and scared.
She didn't know what to do.
She tried to stop liking him, she can't.
Their friendship seemed like a blur that time. She didn't want it to but she had the urge to feel distant.
Her best friend saw her like that and asked her what's wrong.
She didn't want to tell her the truth. She smiled and said, "Nothing's wrong."
She pursued herself to act normal.
She realized, they were getting closer and closer.
She wanted to scream at him and tell him that she likes him, but she can't.
She always stares at him with her weary eyes, but he doesn't seem to realize it.
Every single conversation they had, she felt her heart being ripped apart.
She decided to have a new life.
She wanted to forget about him.
Then, she had a new interest, almost seemed to forget about her painful memory.
She told her best friend she doesn't like him anymore.
She saw a glint of happiness in her best friend's eyes.
She just smiled.
One day, she got a message from her best friend.
When she read it, her heart stopped.
She thought she had forgotten about him, but why did it hurt so badly?
He liked her best friend. And he told it to her.
She faked. She congratulated her.
After that, her world blacked out.
Why was she feeling rejected? She realized there was still that feeling.
But now, they're happy. Because her best friend had told him she liked him too.
She thought about the odds. Would they be together?
She felt anger, betrayal, and pain.
But she noticed her best friend being happy.
Because this was a chance of a lifetime.
She wanted her best friend to be happy.
So she decided.
She washed away every little piece of painful, aching memory of her and him talking, laughing and staring at each others' eyes.
She said to herself that they were never meant to be.
Now that her best friend is happy, she doesn't want to interfere.
She has a chance to him. She was happy.
Her decision made her best friend happy.
"It's for her own sake." She always says.
But, was it for her too?