An exuberant Roman soldier was normally Jack Harkness' idea of a perfect morning. However, he reflected as he charged across Cardiff square with his team hot on his heels, running from a hoard of exuberant (read that angry) Roman soldiers was not. Unforunately, this was exactly the situation he'd landed them in on this fine foggy Welsh morning. And there was no doubt that it was he who had landed Gwen Cooper, Ianto Jones, and himself in this mess; a fact that Gwen would not let him forget any time soon.
"Oh sure, I speak the language! I'll take care of it, it'll be fine!'" Gwen mocked him as they ran pell-mell away from the three hundred or so Rift-stranded and furious Roman soldiers chasing after them. "What were you thinking?"
Jack winced at her tone and yelled a reply over the war cries behind them. "It's been a long time since I spoke it conversationally. I said I was sorry! Oh- Duck!" The trio hit the deck as a volley of spears sailed over their heads. Then they were up again and running harder than before.
Ianto flicked his fluttering tie out of his face and called out, "Jack! What on earth did you say to them?"
"Well," Jack panted, "I tried to say 'we come in peace'. I think what I actually said was 'we will tear you to pieces'."
"Oh, great job there!" Gwen exclaimed. "I can't think why they're upset!"
"In here," Ianto directed, shearing off toward Torchwood's tourist centre cover office. The three of them bundled into the main office and slammed the door behind them quickly. They threw their backs against the wooden door just as it juddered dangerously under a barrage of spears and hefty bodies. Fortunately, it held.
When it became clear that the soldiers had pulled back to rethink their approach, Ianto eased himself over to the controls for the Hub's entrance. Gwen treated Jack to a fierce glare while Ianto opened the door for them.
"If we get through this, Jack Harkness, I am going to kill you."
Jack grinned cheekily at her, but the smile was hastily chased away by a renewal of the battle calls from outside. "They're charging the door, get inside." He followed Ianto and Gwen down to the Hub and hurriedly secured the doors behind them. He regarded the noises coming from outside for a long moment, commenting, "This is going to get nasty." Turning to Gwen, he said, "When we get through this, Gwen Cooper, be my guest."