A/N: as you can see, I'm back in the fanfic world! *pops a party popper by her loneself* Right, I'm sure you don't care for my excuses (depression, stress, tuition, CCA) so here's a fic that will hopefully bring me back some followers. Eheh.

For Lisa, my only ever and best editor and friend

Venny, who deserves a lot more credit than what she gets

Ranice, whose art belongs in a gallery, or auctioned off at immense prices

And lastly, Baka Llama. For making me put up with your shit. Have fun in Finland you doof.

-Begin!-

I PACK QUIETLY

My shirts are in the middle

My underwear are under them

My jeans are on top.

Seven, Eight, Nine, I count

And drop my rolled-up socks

Into the duffle bag

Where they roll and tumble

Off the mountain of my clothes

To the very bottom of the bag

Like rocks.

I put everything else

Into the haversack on my lap.

Snacks, drinks, /money/

Other things

My charger, tissues, plasters.

I wear my parka

Slip a gun underneath

This is America, after all

Rights say I own a gun

Rights say others own a gun

I'd rather shoot than get shot

Only, I don't know how

The ammunition rattle

As I throw its case

Into the depths of my bag

And mineral water

On top of it

The zips jerk, but closes

So does the duffle bag

My knees wobble

About as much as my teeth chatter

I've never run away before

At least, not alone

I sneak past Adelhied

Julie

Shittopi

Kaoru

Rauji

Koyo

None of them wake up

I do fall, however,

On the pavement outside.

There's no one out to help me

So I pick myself up

And my supplies

And take to the street

With my heart pounding

Faster than a bird's flight

If this is what adventure is like

I

Don't

Want

It

THE MOON

Is very round

Is very bright

Is very visible

-Surprisingly; clouds billow in from the left

Is that east

Or west?

I'm no compass

Though my eyes look it.

The moon mocks me

It shines a path brighter than the lampposts

And creates eerie shadows

In the gaps between houses.

People describe it as serene

Quiet

Beautiful

But tonight it just lights up

The cracks on the pavement

Glints off my gun

Making me nervous

I TUG ON MY PARKA COLLAR

Can someone see me?

Tug tug

Will they stop me?

Tug tug

When will Adelhied notice?

Tug tug

Can they see my gun?

Tug tug

What if the police stop me?

Tug tug

What is prison like?

Tug tug

What do I do?

What am I doing

Tug RIIIIP

MY BREATHING IS RAGGED

Like the edges of the hole

In my parka

That I tore.

I berate myself

With the pointless tears

That run down my cheeks

Drip off my chin

Leave behind a trail

Of wet spots

That dry instantly

In the whistle of the wind

I put the duffle bag down

Hug myself

As the wind turns my skin to ice

My bare hands

Are patterned with indents

Where the straps of the duffle bag

Sink down

Weighted with items fit

For two weeks away

I shiver

Blow on my palms

Shiver again

Then heft up the duffle bag

And keep walking

Toward the seven-eleven

It's open

Hurray

THE BELL DINGS AS I WALK THROUGH THE DOOR

There's no one else

Except for the acne-ridden teen

Playing with his iPhone

Behind the counter.

Mashed potato

Pours out the machine

Into my cup

Like slushy

I dig into the gravy

As the sound

Of candy crush

-saga?

Fills the shop

The potato

Tastes like cardboard

When I walk out,

Pocket forty-cents lighter

The sun

Is racing

To catch up to the moon

So I

In turn,

Race the moon

Before it disappears from sight

Then battle

The orb of fire in the sky

Before it hits

Its peak

My stomach dances

The sun shines

Exactly noon

But I avoid all the cafes

Feeling paranoid

And sit

And watch

The buses pull up and leave

I've never felt this lost

THE AIR-CON IN THE BUS IS COLD

Which is good

I feel

Dipped in sweat

Probably

Smell like it too

So I stand

Near the door

Away

From the other commuters

It's still hot

I want to peel off my parka

But how else

Do I hide the tool of violence

And last resorts

Tucked close to my heart?

I get off the bus

Near the beach.

It's sunset

And the ocean waters

Flare

Pink, red, orange, golden

Reflecting

The sun's vibrant colouring

Of the evening sky

I think of dinner

But I used $20

To get here

growl growl

Maybe

I'll get

A sandwich

EATING MY SANDWICH AT A BENCH

alone lets me think

About what I'm doing

What to do next

Where to sleep

Where to go

And such

I still

Wonder what would happen

Should Adelhied

And the others

Find me

Using the duffle bag as my pillow

And the grass patch

Tucked under a sprawling tree

As my matress,

I lie down

And list the 'ifs'

Of today

And 'maybes'

Of tomorrow

Until

Sleep claws up

And takes my mind

Into rest

SNEEZING

Shakes me whole

And shakes me awake

I sit

Brush the leaf off my nose

Gargle the mineral water

And swallow

Breakfast

Is a packet of skittles

Double core

Double rainbow

All the way

Across the sky

Yeah

Yeaaah

So intense

Lightning

Rips the dark clouds apart

Thunder

Shocks me

I RUN FOR COVER

And end up under the eaves

Of a side alley

Where two people make out

Against the dumpster

And a third

Blows cigarette smoke

I feel

So out of place

But stay silent

Waiting

With the strangers

For the rain to stop

Feeling like

Time slows

Lazily

Like a slug

I wonder

Where the morning went

THE SUN BLAZES NOON

And I give in

To my hunger

Bribe my stomach

With swallows of water

Until

I find a store

That robs me only of my last coins

Family Mart

Ding dong

The crackers cost $2.50

"I'll have two,

Thank you."

My lips crack as I quaver a smile

I wince

Run my tongue over the thin lines

Of coppery red

And toss the second packet

Onto the counter

Sealing the deal

Parting with that last coin

I WALK

slowly, zips on my bag jingling

Duffle bag weighing down

On my left arm

Tipping my entire body

Toward the left

Like a drunk

Struggling

With the biscuit packet

Plastic wet and crinkly

Between my teeth

In the end

I get it open

But

Not after I swallow

Part of the edged wrap

I remember

When swallowing

Watermelon seeds

Let them burrow

Into your stomach lining

Grow into a plant

Until it sprouts

Between my lips

-at least,

That's what I thought

When I was

Eight

Biscuit crumbs fall

From my mouth

Bounce off my arms

Land on the floor

I create a trail of them

Feel like Hansel

But there's no place

For me to go back to

Solemnly, I finish my meagre lunch

ANOTHER BUS

Another travel

Another trip

To nowhere

Except,

Maybe,

The land of Lost

My tongue

Finds a lump

Of chewed

Biscuit

I itch

To pick it loose

But fear degrading stares

The man

In front of me picks his nose

I wrinkle mine

In disgust

But

No one looks

So

I stick my finger in my mouth

Remove the biscuit

Lick it from my finger

And try to swallow it

With the irrational guilt

WAKING UP, I GET THROWN OUT THE BUS

Well not really.

'Dragged'

'Shouted at'

'Hauled'

-they're better descriptions

I realise

I

Don't

Know where I am

Or

What

To

Do

Really,

What am I doing?

...crying

Like the Loser Enma I've always been.

A/N: it took me pathetically long to come up with this... hope it wasn't all that bad. I tried to make Enma realistic, believable. I hope I didn't butcher it.

Right, I'm planning for another chapter (or two) for this and then I'm done. (Next update might take weeks to a month...) I could make a "companion" fic in the same universe using the same style. I've already planned out a paragraph involving Hibari and Mukuro in narrative. Maybe. Or maybe the idea will just up and implode in my face. Actually, I'm rooting for 6918- it doesn't have to be romance-based though- maybe just friendship.

Do Review. It'll make my day and you'll get to see your name bolded in the next chappie under credits with a prize to your name. (A cyber one, unfortunately.) :3 kittehface

Okay, peace out mofos