A/N: This is heavily based off of The Truth About Cats and Dogs. I simply wrote this because I thought that my favorite pair fit well in the situation, and I just really wanted to write Artemis this way.

WARNING: Artemis, in regular universe, is a goddess. Therefore she is perfect. Well, in this fic, she will not perfect. She will be extremely body conscious, which is basically the whole reason why the plot happens.

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE RIGHTS TO THE TRUTH ABOUT CATS AND DOGS, NOR DO I OWN PERCY JACKSON AND THE OLYMPIANS.

Please read the Author's Note on the bottom.


There wasn't a time that Artemis remembered that she disliked animals. From the time she was born, she adored stuff animals. She still could recall the stuffed bunny she called Hops that she used for so long that it became a few threads held together by her mother Leto's sewing. And when she was older, her favorite pastime was playing on the Build-a-Bear website.

When she was four, Zeus, her father, bought for her her first puppy. Artemis had squealed happily and looped the Black lab with chocolate eyes and an adorable black nose into her arms. "Daddy," she had said as she looked up at him with bright silver eyes, "I love him. Can I name him Benny?"

Zeus smiled down at her with a wide smile reaching his bright blue eyes that she had not inherited, "Of course, Artemis. He's your dog." Artemis crooned happily and patted the dog's head. She had it sleep on her bed that night, and Benny slept on her bed every night after that.

When she was six she taught Benny his first trick. With thick, chubby hands, she placed a treat on his nose and shouted at him to keep it on balance. Benny'd only cocked his head to the side and watched her with innocent eyes as the treat fell on the ground. "No!" Artemis whined, and put the treat back on Benny's nose. Benny was clueless for at least two hours, but Artemis was persistent and placed the treat on his nose every time it fell. Artemis thought he was kind of a "dummy," but it forged Artemis's patience. When at least Benny got it and could balance the treat, Artemis gathered the whole family. It seemed as though only Leto was paying attention; Zeus was looking on his phone, probably for business sales, and Apollo was playing with one of his Hot Wheels cars. When she had finished the trick, proudly smiling and showing off one of her missing front teeth, her smile broadened when Leto clapped and hugged her tightly. "I'm proud of you."

Two years later, Artemis had taught Benny at least thirty tricks, ten of which she made up by herself. She invested a lot of time in her dog, and loved him more than anything. Artemis began walking him around the neighborhood, her auburn hair swishing around in its tight ponytail. Every time that Benny pulled, she would tug back and say in a high pitched voice, "No! Bad boy, Ben-Ben, bad boy!" And every time he behaved, she would give him a treat with a pat on the head. Benny loved her, and she loved him.

Artemis was ten when she got into archery. She begged her parents for a bow to get on Christmas, and she did. Excitedly running about the house, Artemis could not be placated until she was taken to the range.

Her teacher was a stern woman named Harper, and she strapped Artemis's arm guard with trembling hands. Artemis could barely pull back the string and it made her muscles sore, but she knew she could get stronger and it would get easier. Harper set up all the targets and supplied her with the arrows. Artemis nocked each one with skill and she was a natural. "Too far left," she would mutter to herself when the arrow missed the center by just a fraction of an inch. When Zeus picked her up later that day, he asked her how it went. "Harper said I was accurate, daddy! What does that mean?"

"It means you're able to hit the target very well and get it spot on," Zeus grinned down at her with a toothy smile, "Do you like archery, dear?"

Artemis nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah! It was really fun. My hair got all flown around when I released the string so Ms. Harper told me to tie my hair up. I don't like wearing my hair down, daddy."

Zeus placed a hand on her back and led her to the car. "That's nice," he responded off handedly, as his mind was not focused on his daughter but on the road. "Do you want a snow cone?"

"YES!" Artemis would've hugged him forever if she wasn't in the backseat. She hated being in the backseat.

They went to the stand and Zeus ordered a lemon snow cone for Artemis and raspberry one for himself. They sat down at one of the plastic chairs near the stand and ate slowly. It was the middle of the summer and the burning sun in the sky made the cold ice welcome to their system. Artemis was content with her life, she had her two passions; pets and archery. She licked some of the snow cone off her fingers and threw the wrapping away before bounding toward the car with so much speed that Zeus had no hope of keeping up. They drove home, and Apollo asked his sister how the visit to the range went. "Fun!" Artemis replied before going to her bedroom to finish up her book report due the next year.

Her insecurities began to poison her mind when she was twelve. She still fit in little clothes and felt as thin as a stick. All of her friends and fellow classmates were starting to fill out, and she didn't fail to notice how the boys always gave the girls with bigger breasts all the attention while she was ignored. Artemis always thought there was something wrong with her as she looked in the mirror and she realized she didn't even need a training bra. She told Leto sadly and wanted to cry. "I just want to pretty," she said, hanging her head down.

"You are," Leto comforted her, and stroked the girl's gorgeous long auburn hair. "You are gorgeous. You just need to wait for your body to catch up. Remember patience? It's important. And one day, you'll look like all those girls. I promise." Artemis looked to Leto, with her flaming orange hair that brightened the room and her gentle features. She was considered model worthy, and Artemis only hoped to be like her. She was short, and her mother was tall. Her mother was curvy, and she was...not at all. "I want to look like you when I grow up, mom."

"You will." Leto got up from her seat and left to the kitchen and began making dinner.

She entered high school almost exactly as she had been when she was twelve, except her facial features had matured and her hair had darkened a little bit. Benny had little specks and flecks of white across his body, showing his age. Artemis tried not to think about his inevitable death too much. If she ever did, she ended up crying for hours. She was not picked on for her physique, just ignored. When ever she talked to someone, they would eye her as if wondering why in the hell she was talking to them. She didn't care if the boys did this, she just thought all of them were all assholes anyway. She ended up not caring at all by the end of freshman year and just ignored everyone else in return.

In sophomore year she started interning at a vet's office. All she did was just sign people in and direct them and their pets to the examination room, but it was nice to get some exposure to the profession she wanted to pursue later on in life. She got good experience and it looked good on her transcript. Artemis loved to be around animals, it made her happy, and she was just a natural around them. Cats loved her and dogs adored her. By halfway through the year, she was an animal know-it-all.

It passed her notice that all of the girls had boyfriends and affairs to worry about and that there was homecoming and football games that her high school won and lost. She put all of her attention in trying to become a vet, taking biology and studying textbooks she collected from the school library, where she spent most of her time. Artemis was withdrawn from the world, and she was just fine with that.

"Benny, where are you puppy?" Artemis called for her one and only dog after school one day. She looked around the house and couldn't find him. She turned on her phone and her blood transformed into pure fear when she saw her mother's text message.

Had to take Benny to the vet. His lungs are hemorrhaging. Come as soon as you can.

Artemis choked back a sob. Her face contorted as tears began to fall, ruining her mascara, but she didn't care. Her best friend was going to die. She rushed to the vet, she just couldn't drive fast enough, it seemed. Bursting through the doors, she demanded that the lady up at the front, who had a bad piercing job and purple hair, tell her where the Olympia family was. The poor lady looked terrified, Artemis was a mess, with disheveled hair from tugging it out of stress and ruined makeup, and directed her to a room. She opened the door and saw Apollo and Leto surrounding the dog, who was lying down, unconscious. "They had to give him some drugs to get him to calm down. I'm sorry Artemis. He's not going to survive. He has lung cancer. They can't save him." There were tears resting in Leto's eyes. "We'll let you talk with him for a little bit before he has to go."

They both left the room.

Artemis crawled up to him. "Benny," she choked, "You Goddamn bastard." Her shoulders began to shake as she sobbed uncontrollably. She didn't want to think that this was the last time she would see him. Her eyes would never see her precious Benny again. He would never perform his very first trick and he would never be praised after that shot would be pressed into him. "You can't…" she struggled for air, "You are my only friend." The hollowness swallowed her whole and the grief closed up her windpipe, making it almost impossible to breathe. She knew that this would happen, just not today, she thought, any day but today. Artemis hugged him, her hair brushing against Benny's fur. "I love you, Ben-Ben. Always."

Leto came in and pulled her away from the dog, Artemis was staring blankly at the wall. It had to be done. She loved Benny too much to let him suffer. They all said one final goodbye, and with teary eyed faces and sniffles, they left the office.

Artemis studied the anatomy of any animal that she could find, and read any animal related book she could get her hands on. When she was seventeen she could finally wear a B cup bra, but she didn't care, boys sucked. She still was a good marksman and often went to the archery range to cool off when she was angered by Zeus. They butted heads very often about stupid things. She was all prepared to go to Stanford by the end of senior year and she left her home with a heavy heart and went to California. Her dorm mate, Thalia, was nice enough, but Artemis didn't like her too much because she always brought boys home. And Artemis always had to drown out their weird moans with earphones when Thalia came back drunk from one of the parties thrown by a student that Artemis never knew the name of. College was not for fun, she reasoned, it was meant for academia, and the pursuit of depth to every subject. When she explained this to Thalia, she had looked right at her and replied, "I don't speak fancy, thank you very much."

College did not go by fast, Artemis had to admit that. It was difficult and she had to spend all of her time studying for her masters degree. She had no time for making friends and she could count on one hand how many times she had drank the whole time during her college years. Stanford had high standards, but her hard work paid off, and she got good grades. She talked to Apollo occasionally, since he was not horribly far; he went to Berkley. Artemis was, just like she was in high school, completely closed off. Apollo would often express his concern of her lack of social life, even inviting her to a few parties and trying to set her up with dates, but Artemis wanted none of it.

She began another hobby, playing piano, and she played all the time. She was obsessed. Artemis loved the beauty of it, it was so clear, so beautiful. She sang and played all the time, and often times people would tell her that she had a very soothing voice and should do something with it. She would thank them for the advice and then ask in her head, like what?

She became a vet when she graduated, she showed a lot of talent, and all animals seemed to think she was some kind of goddess and even the most unruly of them all would obey at just one of her words. She was tending to a client's mastiff for a daily check up when he gave her a business card and said, "You got a great voice and we need a new segment on our radio show. You seem to know what you're doing. It's good pay and you seem like the kind of person for this job. Call me when you have considered it." When he left, Artemis was shocked. Had he just asked her to have her own radio channel? It was beyond unbelievable.

She didn't think about it for too long. A radio talk show host about solving people's problems with their animals? Why the hell not?


She was twenty-six and had been in the business for two years. Leo Valdez was her technician, and he put her on the air and cut the show when necessary. He was an impish looking Latino boy with curly black hair and brown eyes that reminded her of chocolate. He was a flirt; but not with her. He made it very clear that he wanted their relationship to remain platonic. Artemis didn't care, she was used to this kind of stuff.

Even at her age, she didn't feel confident with herself. It had been many years, fourteen to be exact, since she had thought she was pretty and felt comfortable with herself. The picture of her naming her room number in the studio's office was not the traditional portrait of herself, but a picture of Benny taken years ago. She looked in the mirror and all she saw was some freaky girl with bright silver eyes no one could look at for too long and dark auburn hair. And her body...she didn't want to think about it. She was practically curveless; she had the bends and fluctuations on her body that a freshman in high school had. She felt as though she was less than desirable.

She came to the elevator and everyone stared at her. "Still as skinny as a pole, aren't ya girl?" some guy from the front of the elevator asked.

Artemis glared at him, the familiar dull pain of the wound from an insult throbbing in her chest. "Why are you looking, huh, Joe?" She was still trying to melt his face with the nasty look during the whole ride and stepped out even though it wasn't her floor to make a point. She scoffed and went up the stairs to her room. Leo unlocked the door as she knocked on the hard wood, and she set her things down by the soundboard. "Hey Valdez. What's up?"

Leo lifted his head and began messing with some knobs that Artemis still didn't know the use for. He waved. "Hey Artemis. We're going on air in about ten minutes, so get yourself all warmed up and whatever else it is you do. Oh, and some magazine was left in our mail, probably some junk mail." He plopped a magazine into Artemis's lap. On the cover it featured a beautiful blonde with long wavy hair and the perfect complexion. She had what men chased after, big breasts and a toned stomach. Her blue eyes were mesmerizing and her lips were curled up in a small smile. Her name was Aphrodite Pickett, and she lived near Artemis's apartment building. Artemis stared at her pretty face with envy swirling and swimming in her head, clouding her vision.

"Leo, I know this girl." Artemis lifted up the magazine and pointed at the perfect blonde. Leo scanned the front cover. "Ha, yeah right. Women like that don't exist. Otherwise they'd be chasing after me." He grinned and winked as Artemis rolled her eyes in exasperation at the tech's amorous behavior. Artemis walked over to her station and sat down, putting the comfortable headphones on and tapping the microphone placed by her mouth.

"On in five!" Leo announced.

Artemis nodded and felt almost a switch in her mind. She was in the zone. When she had first started, she was a nervous wreck and she stammered almost constantly. Artemis began practicing two hours after work, the radio was her job after all, and she gradually improved. She was professional and intrepid on the air, and it showed. People began to spread word about the radio talk show host, and she was a mini celebrity by the time she had done the show for a year. The show was called Cats and Dogs: Secrets Revealed, and Artemis got mountains of mail requesting her assistance and calls 24/7. Most of the people were doofuses, and called for silly reasons, but Artemis enjoyed not only the generous paychecks, but she also found joy in hearing the antics of both owner and pet. All in all, she was pretty okay with her job. And Leo, despite his unnecessary rejection (she wasn't even remotely interested in him!), was a good companion.

"And...go…!" Leo whisper yelled, waving the signal with his hands.

Artemis pushed her shoulders back and willed her spine to be straight. She had learned early that good posture always helped with her speech. "Hello, this is Dr. Artemis Olympia, what is your name?"

"My name is Jem," the girl said. Artemis briefly thought of To Kill a Mockingbird, "and I came back home from a weekend long trip, and when I saw my favorite dress, it was all torn!" The lady sounded frantic.

"I'm not a seamstress ma'am-"

"And I have this German shepherd named Moxie and she was laying right next to it, looking proud of herself!" the lady cut her off rudely, and Artemis could only imagine the wild look on her face. "And-and...Oh my god she's got my shoes! You she-devil! Bad! BAD DOG!"

Artemis winced. "Okay, okay, ma'am, calm down. Moxie's just missed you while you were gone. Dogs aren't like people, they don't hide their feelings like you and I do. She's telling you something, she's telling you that she doesn't want to be left alone. Moxie will just need to be put outside when you go out for too long, or your stuff will get chewed up."

"But-But I-" the woman stammered, clearly not wanting to be hung up on.

"Next caller please," Artemis was smiling brightly as she said this. That lady seemed overly paranoid.

"Hi, um, my goldfish is acting weird, like he won't eat and he's kind of floating up at the top of the bowl and his belly's facing up-" Artemis blushed in mortification as Leo cackled hysterically at the woman's idiocy and it probably carried through the microphone. The woman continued to ramble and Artemis only heard, "What do I do? " at the end of the speech that almost put her to sleep.

Artemis resisted guffawing as she advised what anyone, literally anyone would've advised her. "Uh, yeah, you're gonna have to put it in the toilet and flush it."

"Flush it?" the woman sputtered. "This is an award winning fish we're talking about here!" Artemis resisted the urge to yell and cry out. It was people like her that made her job a living hell sometimes. "Uh huh, sure. Next caller."

The next voice was deep, melodic almost, and pure sexy. Artemis's heart pounded in her ears unbearably and her whole body tingled as he began to speak. His voice, although she'd only heard it say a few words, was amazing. "Hello, Dr. Artemis Olympia."

"Uh, h-hi. My name's Percy Jackson. I've got some problems with my dog." He spoke with a slight New York accent.

"Okay, Percy, what's wrong with your dog?" She asked leaning forward. The last two words she humorously said in the same New York accent he had.

"Well, um," It sounded like he was looking away, as there was a swishing sound that his phone picked up on, "He's kind of wearing cowboy boots, and I can't get up close to him, and you see-" There was a deep bark, interrupting his sentence-"I'm a photographer and I kind of need to get him under control."

Percy had two clients with him, so that a young child could take some pictures with the black lab dressed in boots. They were currently backed into a corner, as Blackjack, the dog, growled and snarled at him territorially. Percy reached up a hand, but the dog barked viciously, causing him to yelp and jump back.

"May I ask how you got your dog in boots?" Artemis asked, holding back an amused smile. Smiles interrupted her radio voice.

"Well, you see, he's not my dog, and the boots thing is kind of a long story." Percy backed away, scared out of his wits. The only reason why he wasn't screaming and running away with no dignity was Artemis's pleasing voice. It was sweet, and something he wanted to listen to all day. If he could, he would. He promised himself that after the situation with Blackjack that he would listen to her radio station as often as possible.

"Right," she said sarcastically, "So your dog is feeling threatened, so you need to show him that you're not going to hurt him. You need to get into a submissive position."

"And how do I do that?" Percy said, his breath a little shaky.

Artemis allowed herself to smirk. The situation called for it; she could almost imagine Percy on all fours, a phone in the crook of his neck, as he approached a growling dog. It would be funny, if it wasn't so scary. "You need to get down on all fours." Leo let out a snort.

"Um...okay," he was whispering then. It sounded as though the phone was being moved around, and then he said, "What do I do now?"

"Make sure there is no eye contact."

"No eye contact…" Percy repeated.

"Good, now make your voice sound soothing and reassure him. See how I'm able to soften my voice?" She made her voice softer, quieter, and slightly deeper. Percy swallowed. This woman was doing a number on him. "Um...yeah." He approached the dog on all fours, applying pressure to the phone so it doesn't fall. He reached out a tentative hand and said, "It's okay, boy, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you."

Blackjack snapped at him and snarled ferociously. Percy was close to him, and right when his hand was about to reach him-

He yelped as a dog's bark ripped through his eardrums, and he dropped the phone onto the ground. Artemis jumped and said, "Are you okay, Percy? Are all of your fingers intact?"

"Yeah," his chest was heaving from the adrenaline. "Y-yeah." He breathed in a breath of relief, but he still didn't know how to placate the dog. Luckily Artemis answered that for him.

"Alright, just run your fingers along his ear to the tips, it's an acupuncture point and should calm him down," she instructed. Percy obeyed, and Blackjack whined immediately after and he licked him on the face. Percy backed away, his face contorted from both disgust and affection. Artemis heard his faint noises of "gross," and "Ewwwwwww." She laughed and said, "Well, Percy, congratulations on your new family member."

"Oh, oh no, I can't have a dog, I mean...I live by myself-"

Artemis grinned. She couldn't hold back the smiles back anymore, not while hearing him stammering nervously. She ran right over his reasoning to why he couldn't have a dog. "Trust me, it'll make things a lot better. We'll send you some pamphlets on pet care and their shots." She leaned forward. "Have a good day Percy."

"Aaaaand...Cut!" Leo said as if they were on a movie set. Artemis sighed and leaned back. "You're on in sixty," Leo reminded her. Artemis nodded and headed to her desk to look at the letters and answer them. She plopped the offensive magazine (although only to her) onto her desk as well.

The next few days came and flew by in a haze. She was sorting through her letters when she got an unexpected call. She took it, and said tentatively, "Yes? Hello?"

"H-hi. It's Percy, you know, the guy with the dog wearing cowboy boots," she heard that deep voice coming from the phone and her stomach dropped and her heart slammed into her feet. She could imagine him scratching the back of his neck, his tone was nervous as he said, "I, um, adopted Blackjack."

Artemis smiled kindly even though she knew that he couldn't see it. "That's very good. How do you like having a dog?"

"It's been great, I mean, I've taught him tricks, and," he took a deep breath as quietly as he could so that Artemis couldn't tell that he was nervous. "And me and Blackjack would like to thank you."

"Oh, then you're welcome," Artemis replied teasingly.

"No,I mean, in person. I'd-we," he corrected himself, "would like to thank you in person."

Artemis laughed awkwardly to dispell the tension that had built since he had made his suggestion. "Oh yeah, I should just go meet up a complete and total strangerwho I'd only contacted once through my radio show. There's a lot of different creep fans out there, you know."

"Rght, and I'll be carrying an axe to a public place, just casually sipping my tea," Percy responded back, and she shrugged.

"Fair enough. Fine. You've got your meeting. How about we meet at the entrance of Franklin Park (totally a made up place) at noon and you and Blackjack can 'thank me in person.'" She moved to hang up on him on him, but he stammered out a "Wait!" before it was too late.

Artemis placed the phone next to her ear and tossed her hair over a shoulder. "Yeah?"

"I don't know what you look like. I need to know, so you know, I know it's you."

Artemis's eyes traveled to the magazine laying on her desk. She was in a trance as she asked, "What do you think I look like?"

"Well if your voice's anything to go by, you probably look amazing." Percy said, making Artemis's heart sink. Her insecurities were rearing their ugly heads, making her stare at the picture of the perfect model harder. Artemis didn't look amazing. She wouldn't want to disappoint him, she knew he was attractive, it was just an intuition thing, and attractive people didn't go with unattractive ones. He wouldn't want to see her again if he saw Artemis. But he wouldn't be disappointed if he saw Aphrodite, she would be just what he expected, he would want to see her again.

So she ended up blurting out: "Um, tall, blonde, you'll know it's me when you see me." She couldn't believe herself. Had she just lied to this man?! God, she was so screwed.

"Okay, see you there," Percy said, hope in his voice.

"No, you won't," Artemis muttered to herself after he hung up. She sighed and finished up her work. After she had dumped the last letter into the mailing chute, she locked up the office, since it was her turn that month. She said goodbye to Herbert, the security guard, and walked the short way to her apartment. She had a nice one; it allowed large musical instruments, pets, and there were sound ordinances. The only problem was Ares La Rue, the landlord and collector of rent. He was a jackass with an expensive leather jacket and Ray Ban sunglasses that he wore even during the nighttime. There had been rumours that his eyes were black pits of cruel nothingness, and that if you looked into them for too long, you would disintegrate. Artemis hated him with a passion, he was such a perverse, violent asshat. There were no words to describe how much she hated him.

And the one problem of the apartment building was right in front of her entrance to her floor.

"I told you that your dress makes you look fat! Okay? I want you to change, because it makes you look fat," Ares argued and moved to put his hand on his girlfriend's arm, but she moved away. There was no dress on the face of the earth that could make Aphrodite Pickett look fat. She was wearing a light blue dress that tightened at the waist and flowed at the bottom. Aphrodite looked perfect in it.

"No I don't want to change, this is the third dress I've changed into!" Aphrodite attempted to get away, but Ares held her tight. Artemis decided to step in. Someone had to stop the commotion before some idiot calls the police in fear that a thief is arguing with their lock (her name was Demeter, she was beyond crazy).

She stepped forward and placed her hands on her modest sized hips. Ares was always calling her "dumb bitch," so she said to him, "I heard dumb bitch and I assumed you were calling me."

Ares curled his lip in disgust and ran a hand through his greasy hair. "You guys are both dumb bitches."

Artemis looked to Aphrodite, a look of fake shock in her face. Aphrodite didn't seem to get it, she looked confused. "Oh really, your name is dumb bitch too?" She swiveled around to meet A Ares's eyes. "There seems to be a lot of dumb bitches around here because you can't seem to call anyone anything else." She stepped closer. "Now get out of here before I hurt you in ways you can never imagine." She glared up at him; she felt pathetic; with her small frame next to his, but she held her ground.

Ares laughed and pushed her to the ground. Artemis landed with a loud thump, and Aphrodite yelled in fear. She rushed to help her defender up, and Artemis felt a sharp pain in her lower back. She prayed that nothing had happened to her spine. Ares turned to her, pointing to her with an accusing finger, "You are such a dumb bitch, you know that?" And he looked down at Artemis, who was struggling to get up. "And you," malice filled out his voice, "You're not just a dumb bitch. You're an ugly dumb bitch."

Hurt seeped into her gut, her old wounds feeling like they were being stabbed over and over again. Aphrodite gave her a sympathetic look as the douche walked away with heavy footsteps. Artemis sighed and dusted herself off. She had learned long ago how to hide her true feelings. She used the skill on her radio talk show countless times, and it came in handy in times like that. She was used to being insulted about her appearance, but it still bothered her. Just like it still bothered you if you were cut in the same place continuously. Artemis gave Aphrodite a weak smile. She chose not to tell her that she had previously told a certain man named Percy Jackson that she looked like her. Aphrodite probably wouldn't have processed the information anyway.

Aphrodite looked around, as if worried someone had seen them. "I'm so sorry. I really am. Ares can be...a bit mean sometimes."

Artemis raised an eyebrow and rubbed her ribs. "A bit?"

Aphrodite bit her lips and looked down at the short silver-eyed girl. "Look, I'm just sorry. I'll make it up to you, but I really gotta go."

"Oh no, that's not necessary-" But Aphrodite had already turned and left.


Percy clipped the leash onto Blackjack, who was surprisingly obedient as soon as Percy had announced they were going out for a walk. Well, it wasn't really a walk as much it was a meet-up. He needed to bring Blackjack so that his alibi would be legitimate and Artemis wouldn't suspect that he just wanted her alone. In his head, it sounded like the perfect plan. He opened the door and bolted out, since he was nearly late. It was already eleven fifty-five and they planned to meet at noon.

He sat at the bench near the entrance of one of his favorite parks. He had a lot of memories made at Franklin Park. His father and brothers would take him there as a little kid, and they played together. Percy briefly recalled with a snort that he always cried when his older brother so cruelly would knock over his sandmen. He loved the swings. And as he looked out at the kids toppling over each other for their turn on the monkey bars, he thought to himself, I'd love to have kids. Too bad his previous girlfriends never wanted any. The desire for children was the main reason Percy broke up with his previous girlfreinds. They were always too focused on starting their careers.

His last girlfriend was a beautiful young architect named Annabeth Chase, and she had told him, right to his face, that, "Of course I want children, Percy," his heart had lifted when she said that, but then it was crushed as she continued on, "But just not with you." Percy had a thing for blondes, and curvy ones at that (well, didn't every guy?) and Annabeth was perfect for him physically. But she was condescending, and threw her intelligence around like it was her Harvard degree. I'm a genius, she would say, and you're not. I want to have kids with another genius. Perhaps a sperm donor would be okay? I can still have a family with you. We'll tell them you're the father.

Percy had been thoroughly disgusted and had got the hell out of there. And from her, he had learned that looks didn't mean shit if the owner of the body had an unattractive mind.

So there he waited on that bench. And waited. Waited. WAITED.

He checked his watch for the thirtieth time. Was it already a quarter till one? He cursed under his breath. He had just got stood up; for good or bad reasons. He wondered if she thought he was some creep just trying to get into her pants; or if she was legitimately busy or something with her family came up. She had no means to contact him, anyway. He got up. "Come on, Blackjack. We'll just go see her at the studio tomorrow."

Blackjack whined and followed him obediently.

"Alright guys, thank you for listening today. See you tomorrow." Artemis smiled, hoping it was communicated through the radio waves. She took off the headphones and stood up, but Leo came to her. "There's some blonde lady outside waiting for you. Should I let her in?"

Artemis knew it was Aphrodite so she nodded and sat back down while Leo reached for the knob and let the model in. Aphrodite Pickett sauntered in, holding flowers in her hands. They were pretty, with various colors and did not look very cheap. Artemis was expecting her. She grinned back at the girl, and took the flowers graciously. "I'm sorry about the way Ares behaved," Aphrodite apologized. "It wasn't right, and I didn't move to stop him."

"It's okay, definitely," Artemis said. "I'm going to go put this in a vase." She knew well of her neighbor's fascination with the news, so she said as she left the room, "And you can play with that mic if you want."

Aphrodite squealed in delight and began to talk in a more monotone voice, leaning forward in her seat excitedly and wringing her hands together.

Percy walked through the large building, and saw the directory to all the stations. There he saw the plaque for Dr. Artemis Olympia, but instead of a picture of her, there was a picture of a black dog with wide, brown eyes. Percy smiled at the cleverness of it. He stumbled as Blackjack led him, almost as if he knew where Artemis was. Percy eventually gave up and just followed him, and came to a complex full of stations. He finally found the room for Dr. Artemis, and saw a flawless woman with headphones on speaking into the microphone. She had long, flowing blonde hair and the perfect physique that made Percy struggle to hold back dirty thoughts. She wore a flirty pink dress. This must be Artemis, he almost swooned, my God, she's just as perfect in person.

He saw a lithe girl walk in with auburn hair that he'd rarely seen in his life and silver eyes. She looked intimidating, with her regal features and determined expression. She glanced at him for a few seconds then leaned forward to Artemis (the one he thinksis Artemis). The blonde nodded and turned to wave him, flashing him a dazzling smile. Percy almost fell over, since his arm went slack with shock that such a beautiful woman was paying attention to him and Blackjack was pulling almost unbearably hard. Artemis waved to a Latino boy to open the door, and Percy walked in, breathing heavily from the run up. "I missed you at Franklin Park."

"Oh really?" Artemis's voice was lighter and breathier in person than on the radio, he noticed.

"Your voice," he said, fighting back disappointment. He loved her voice on the radio. He had listened to the show on the way there. "It's different."

Artemis tapped the microphone at her side. "These things work wonders." She laughed lightly, causing him to laugh too. He saw the auburn haired girl put her hands on her narrow hips in his peripheral. He gestured to her. "And who's this?"

Artemis looked to the girl beside her. "Oh, um she's...uh Mad-Donn….Diana. Her name's Diana."

Diana gave him a sheepish wave and he flashed a charming smirk her way. He turned back to Artemis. "Why didn't you come yesterday?"

The stunning blonde sighed. "I'm sorry. I couldn't come because I had some family business to take care of, and I couldn't tell you that I had to cancel because I don't have your number."

Percy nodded. "Okay. So is there a way we can meet up again? To make up for Franklin Park?"

He saw Diana shake her head almost sternly, but Artemis's eyes flash and she said, "Of course! How about the Ambrosia Tavern at seven?"

Percy nodded. "That sounds great." Just like you do on the radio whenever I listen to you.

Blackjack made an appearance, and Artemis jumped in surprise. She leaned back in her chair in….fear….? That didn't make sense though, Percy thought, she's a vet. Isn't she used to dogs by now? "G-get that thing away from me, Diana."

The girl assumed an aggressive stance and scolded the dog lightly. "Oh come on, boy. What are you doing?" Blackjack whined as if defending himself, and Percy chuckled slightly as Blackjack rubbed up against Diana affectionately. Eventually the dog closed its eyes and licked her hand. She eyed the dog with a faint look of sadness, her palm slowing its rubbing against his black coat. (Sorry it got confusing. It's in Percy's point of view, and he perceives Aphrodite as Artemis. This won't happen again. Just wanted to make it clear that he's totally fooled.)

"So...we're on for the Ambrosia Tavern?" Percy asked, just to make sure as he took Blackjack by the leash and tugged him to his side.

"Yep," Aphrodite confirmed, smizing at him. Artemis recognized her expression as a model's trick. She shifted uncomfortably. Aphrodite's perfection made her feel like a short dwarf from that Snow White movie. She felt ugly. Percy wasn't even looking at her. He seemed friendly enough. But he wouldn't be looking at her like he was looking at Aphrodite if he knew the truth.

Percy was impossibly handsome. He had black tousled hair that just looked sexy and effortless, and his eyes, oh his eyes. He had sea green eyes that pulled her into them, she wanted to get lost in them, escape her insecurities and become a part of them. He wore a plain blue shirt that showed off his muscles that Artemis ached to touch and trace her hand on. She didn't even know what held her back, to be honest. Percy pet Blackjack absent mindedly. "You know, if it weren't for you, Blackjack and I wouldn't have been together, and I appreciate it. And what you said on the radio was so...clever...and…" He looked Aphrodite so genuinely, but Artemis knew that the words were directed towards her and the sincerity was for her own wits. She had never been complimented so profusely before.

She felt herself nodding and the words tumbled out of her mouth without her discretion. "That's so great."

Aphrodite nodded slowly, and said, "Yeah. Really great."

Percy smirked a lopsided smile and Artemis felt herself staring at his glorious features. They were sharp and angular, and his not-thin-but-not-too-thick lips were crooked in a handsome smile. "Well I'm glad you two think so."

He waved at them and turned to leave. "Sorry. Duty calls." And with that, he left.


Aphrodite and Artemis went for a shopping day because Artemis realized she did not have an outfit proficient enough for their "date." Aphrodite had jumped at the chance to go shopping with someone, since Ares never wanted to shop with her. They met together at the nearest outdoor mall by their apartment. The two woman were walking to the makeup stores when Aphrodite said, "Why did you tell him that you look like me?"

"Because he has expectations. Ever heard of Great Expectations, Aphrodite? Pip gets disappointed when he doesn't get Estella and doesn't become the gentleman he wanted. And I don't want Percy to be disappointed. He expects you: a gorgeous, perfect model," Artemis explained.

"But, like, why? You're gorgeous; you have a really pretty face!" Aphrodite exclaimed, looking down at her, the Ray Ban sunglasses sliding down her nose bridge.

Artemis snorted and looked away. "About as 'gorgeous' as a dead cockroach. Practically every guy rushes to get your attention. You burp, they think it's cute, you fall, they help you up in a split second."

"That's not true," Aphrodite protested. Right as she said that, a guy in a gray sweatshirt and tan skin walked by. As soon as he cast a glance to Aphrodite, he wolf whistled and walked on. Artemis snorted again when he ran right into a pole because he wasn't looking where he was going. Artemis burst out laughing, and Aphrodite looked appalled. Not at the man's strange behavior, but at Artemis's. "What? What's so funny?!"

"Nothing," Artemis said as she chuckled to herself. Now that kind of attention from men, Artemis did not envy. The poor model walking beside her was almost completely unaware of it too. She assumed that Aphrodite was unaware of a lot of things, so she didn't press it.

They turned the corner and went into a restaurant that was made by two older people that lived in their building. It reminded her faintly of the cafe that she used to eat at with her mother. Her heart pounded harder at the mention of her mother.

Her parents had a tragedy story in their possession. As soon as Artemis left for college, Zeus had come clean about an affair he had harbored for over six years. It devastated Leto, who had been fooled into thinking they had a happy family. She became extremely depressed, and ate almost nothing. It frightened Artemis and she drove down to her hometown very often to check in on her. Artemis's professors understood on the most part when she left class early when she got a text from Apollo saying that their mother was drunk out of her mind and needed to be pumped again. And the previous summer, only a month after Artemis had turned twenty five, her mother tipped over the edge. She died from liver failure, and Artemis felt like it was too much. Her hatred of men only heightened whenever she saw her father's hideous face. She hated him. Despised him.

She missed Leto. She missed Benny. She missed the family Christmases, where Apollo played with his new toy trains and Benny would lay in her lap by the fireplace. When they listened to Burl Ives as they decorated the Christmas tree. She missed it all so much. There was a gaping hole in her heart that had steadily widened over the years. The loneliness had made her become hollow.

They sat down by the window, giving them a view of the street. Aphrodite smiled at the waiter, a young teenager leering at her, and took the menu from him. She looked at it with unbridled fascination. Artemis took a menu as well, and the waiter looked at her like she was an unsightly view. She tried not to feel very offended.

When he came back, he asked what they wanted to eat. Aphrodite had said she wanted a burger, a surprisingly fattening food for a model to order. Artemis said that she would have the same thing and turned to her. "Like, he's got the accent and everything. Why don't you just tell him?"

Artemis laughed to herself. "Oh my gosh I've already told you!" She shook her head. Was Aphrodite just dumb, or…?

The waiter came back with their burgers, balancing it expertly in his hand. He leaned forward discernibly so that his chest could rub lightly against Aphrodite's boob. Artemis gasped at his audacity and gave him a hard slap when he set her food down. Her glare told him very clearly that he would not receive a good tip.

Aphrodite poked her uneaten hamburger as Artemis dug in. She looked up. "Aren't you gonna eat that?"

Aphrodite returned her questioning glance. "Oh, well, I can't eat. Like, I love menus, and the idea of menus. I love ordering. But I can't eat; so you know, I can look good." She leaned forward. "But you know that saying you are what you eat?" She appeared almost afraid.

Artemis nodded slowly.

"I was thinking about it, and if I don't eat anything, then I'm nothing. There's nothing there." Her facial expression made her look like she had stumbled upon the most fascinating thing ever discovered. Artemis narrowed her eyes as a amused smile spread over her face. "But you on the other hand," she nodded and grinned at the eaten up burger, "are very full."

Artemis looked down. She was a skinny girl, and still she was insecure about how much she ate. She always thought that her hips felt a little spongy with fat and her forearms were too thick when she peered at herself in the mirror. Aphrodite sipped from her lemonade straw and stared out the window. Artemis couldn't believe this girl. Did she realize just how rude that was?

Aphrodite turned back to her, a bright smile on her face. "Okay! You're clearly done, and so am I, let's go!"

They left and paid the bill, and Artemis left anything but a hefty tip. As they were walking along the road to get to the makeup store, she thought that it was actually very nice to have a friend, even if she was pretty clueless. They walked into the Sephora, and Artemis felt like she was really out of place. She was no stranger to cosmetics; she wore a little bit of makeup every day, but she was dressed in frumpy clothes and Aphrodite did not compliment her well.

A woman in her late teens with a nose ring and so much product it probably weighed a few pounds approached them. Her voice was unpleasantly nasal as she said, "Welcome to Sephora, how may I help you?" She curled her lips at Artemis, revealing red lipstick stained teeth.

"We're looking more a pore minimizer, if you please," Aphrodite replied, her hands on her hips.

"Actually I'd like a pore maximizer if you please," Artemis cut in, "For a place to put your stuff in when you don't have a purse." She sneered at the Sephora employee, laughing inside at the girl's look of disgust. The girl, whose name was Amanda, laughed sarcastically and turned away before grabbing a mirror.

"Look at your skin," Amanda said almost hypnotically, "It's in horrible condition. Look at the sun damage. You haven't been taking care of your skin."

Artemis gazed at the mirror and saw delicate and soft features, but they weren't sharp and sexy, the kind guys liked. They weren't the kind that she thought Percy would like. She saw the bright silver eyes that seemingly glowed, and her high cheekbones. She saw her puckered, almost pouting pink lips and thought that it was decidedly the only feature she liked that she had. She wanted it all to change. So she let Amanda do whatever she desired to do with her face.

And they ended up leaving with two big bags of makeup and a crying Artemis looking like a clown. Her lips were covered with a bright red paste and her eyes were an unflattering shade of dark blue. Her blush was overdone as well. "I don't get it. I don't get why women wear stuff like this to attract a man," she lamented hopelessly to Aphrodite. She rubbed the auburn's back in a poor attempt to comfort her. "I mean if I were a guy, I'd be surrounded by girls. I'm rich, successful, funny, and can play an instrument. But I'm not, and it's expected of me to look-" Perfect.

"I'd fuck you," Aphrodite said, nodding.

Artemis sniffled. "Thanks girl, I know you would."

They got up after twenty minutes, and went to their building. Aphrodite tugged at Artemis's hair, straightening it so they could pull it into a pretty and sleek ponytail. She applied make up and put on a pretty black dress that showed off her meager cleavage and had lace sleeves. Aphrodite thought she looked very pretty; and said so, but Artemis argued that she was nothing compared to Aphrodite. She looked like a goddess of beauty, her golden hair piled up into an elegant bun and her pink peach dress went perfectly with her flawless complexion. Artemis could never rival her. Even at her best and the blonde's worst.

They walked to The Ambrosia Tavern, since it wasn't too far. Through the clear glass they could see Percy's back, facing the bar. They stopped for a second. Aphrodite placed a hand on Artemis's shoulders. "You can do this," she said, "You're going to tell him. You can do this." Artemis took a deep breath. Her weak resolve collapsed as she looked back to Percy, his wild hair sprouting into every direction. He was so handsome and out of her league she just...couldn't do it. So she took one inept step forward and then swiftly turned around. Aphrodite called after her and chased her down. She dragged the radio talk show host to the bar. "You're coming whether you want to or not."

They entered the bar, and Percy's face lit up as he saw Aphrodite's face. Artemis felt as though she would give anything to have him look at her like that instead. "Artemis!" He looked at the real Artemis and furrowed his brow. It was not rude or disrespectful, it was just out of pure confusion. "Hello, Diana...right?"

Artemis nodded. "Yep, that's my name."

Aphrodite smiled at him. "I've got to go to the bathroom. Diana's got this really strange story to tell you!" She had to shout over the loud music, and Percy wilted just a bit to see the girl he thought was Artemis leave. Diana sat next to him. "I'll just have a light beer, please."

Percy turned and ordered their drinks and a tray of appetizers. He turned back to her. She could smell the faint scent of the ocean and cologne and it was heaven to her lungs. His handsome face and mesmerizing green-blue eyes peered down at her as he said, "So. What's the story you wanted to tell me?"

Artemis could feel her heart pounding in her chest. This was the moment when she would come clean, the moment when he realized that the girl he was so hopelessly into was actually a skinny, silver eyed freak that no one really liked. He would be so disappointed, Artemis fought the urge to cry. She felt as though she owed it to Percy to be like Aphrodite, but she wasn't. So she just said, "Oh, um, it's about societal pressures and you know, relationships between men and women…" She paused when she saw that Percy was completely uninterested, as it seemed. He looked back behind him to check if Aphrodite was back before she continued. "And you know, just being safe. You're probably wondering why I'm here."

"No, not at all! I know exactly why you're here," Percy exclaimed, making relief flood into her head. She grinned.

"Really, you do? And you're okay with it?" She was cautious at that point. What if he was mad?

"Of course I am!" Percy said, and Artemis's eyes widened. He was okay that she lied about her appearance?! "I mean, it's a really good thing for you to do, you know, watching after Artemis like this. You wanna make sure I'm legit."

Artemis nodded slowly. "Um...yeah...that's why I'm here."

Percy looked behind him before placing his attention back on her. His focus on Artemis felt like a bright spotlight that completely blinded her. "What do you do for a living?"

Artemis panicked. She couldn't tell him her real job or he'd figure it all out and then he'd be...well, you know. "Um...I…" she said what first came to her head. "I make wine."

Percy raised an eyebrow. "Wine? That's...interesting."

Artemis nodded, her voice monotone. "Yes. I inherited a large ranch from a freakish inheritance and now I come down to the Vineyard every week or so to check up on my grapes," she continued to explain about how she took care of her grapes, and although Percy looked like he was listening on the outside, she knew that he was extremely disinterested. Percy looked behind her one final time before Aphrodite came back.

"So!" Aphrodite said perkily, "Did she tell you?"

Percy nodded. Aphrodite's eyes lit up, misinterpreting his nod. "Yep. She told me that occasionally you would come down to Diana's ranch tend to her grapes."

Artemis freaked out and she nodded frantically at Aphrodite's blank, dumb, and confused stare. "Huh? Uhh…"

Artemis's nodding became more insistent as Percy wasn't looking and facing Aphrodite. Aphrodite finally took the hint after what felt like an eternity. It was silent for a few moments as Aphrodite formulated a response. "Oh! Oh yes! Her wine bottles make excellent Christmas gifts."


A/N: Some of you might be wondering why this profile has been such a ghost town lately. Well, there's a few things.

1. I have lost a lot of my drive to write. When I am passionate about something, I am very passionate about it. Unfortunately, I have lost a lot of my "fire" so to speak. It's a huge character flaw of mine,.

As such, I will not be writing as much as you guys want. Updates will be rare until I'm out of this funk. It may not last as long as you think.

2. I am a very stressed student. I feel very pressured to do well these days, as in our current economy and job market it is important to get a good degree and go to a prestigious college. I am definitely stressed.

3. I am currently working on a book! Yep, that's right, not fanfiction. That takes up time, too. I'm hoping to have it published and ready next summer.

I actually haven't written this in...maybe six months. I never posted it. I'm posting it now as a sort of apology of my lack of activity. If you want me to continue this, I'll start working on it. It will take a while, as next update will likely be the same length as this.

I don't think I'll be as active on this site as I used to, with life getting in the way and all. I write basically in short bursts. I don't sit down and write a thousand words at once like I used to.

I am so sorry guys.

Thank you for being such amazing readers.

-coolcoco98