A day in the Akatsuki Hideout
"Today, we will be talking about how to capture all of the Jinchuurikis to get the tailed beast inside them effectively." Pein spoke to all of the Akatsuki members. "Tell me your opinions on how to capture them."
"Kill them! Sacrifice them to Lord Jashin! Jashin!" Hidan grinned maniacally.
"Sell their bodies after we extract the tailed beasts, more money for us to buy a new television." Kakuzu said smirking.
"Hehehe, feed their chakras to Samehada, right boy?" Kisame said while petting his pet-I mean sword Samehada.
"We will go to Konoha to capture the 9 tails, and I can meet my beloved brother Sasuke too…" Itachi mumbled the last part slowly to himself.
"Hah! Gather all of them together in one place and explode them, un! Explosion is art, un!" Deidara shouted happily.
"…After extracting their tailed beast, put their corpse in my room, I know what to do with them…especially with the host of 2 tails and 7 tails…" Sasori said slowly while keeping his blank face.
"Give them to us. We'll eat them. HeHeHeHe."WhiteZetsu and Black Zetsu laughed together.
"Trick them by showing them that we are good boys! And kill them when they least suspected! And then start a war to create a dream world with Rin in it…" His voice changed drastically while saying the last part. "I mean, Tobi is a good boy!Hahaha…ha…" He noticed that all of the members were looking at him with their eyes bulging out.
"Teach them how to do Origami." Konan said. She saw all of them looking at her weirdly. "What? I love origami. Origami is awesome, unlike all of you boys."
"All of your plans are stupid!" Pein shouted at them.
"Shut up stupid leader with piercing! Like you know how to handle it!" Hidan shouted at him.
"Silence! I'm a god!"
"Pffft, god complex much?" All of them snickered.
"You don't know my pain!" Pein shouted embarrassedly.
"Then who told you to do piercings, un?" All of them laughed again. Pein fumed.
"Anyway when can I go to Konoha? I want to meet my brother. Sasuke…wait for your Nii-san okay…? I'll bring some tomatoes for you…."
"Jashin jashin jashin jashin! Kill kill kill kill! Somebody stab me please?!"
"Haha don't worry Samehada-chan, we'll get some delicious chakra later okay?"
"Explosion is art, un! Kill them with bombs, un! Un un un un!"
"Stop moaning Deidara, I already planned on what to configure them with when they become my puppets…Especially 2 tails and 7 tails…"
"When can I get out of here, I want to sell their bodies to buy some Pocky. And a slave so I can take his heart and make it mine."
"That is not a good way to convey your love Kakuzu. Since Origami is the best way to connect to each other~"
"I'm god! I have 6 bodies! You don't know my pain!"
"How do pooping feels like? Maybe we can poo on them too."
"Wait for me…Rin… I'll kill all these idiots and we can go on a picnic in our dream world…Kyaaa~"
And so, the meeting had failed. This was why Akatsuki was meant to collapse in the first place.