A/N: This idea has been nagging me for a while, so I finally decided to stop procrasinating and go ahead with it. Please be warned that this fic contains Season Five spoilers, so read at your own risk. This will be a multi-chapter story that will focus on Danny and Lindsay, both as individuals and as a couple. It will look at their past and current struggles, and will contain my own thoughts and hopes for how DL should be handled this season. There is a smut scene, but since I still choose not to write it as I like to focus on other aspects of their relationship, the content is very light. Reviews are always appreciated. Enjoy!

All mistakes are mine.

Chapter 1 - Conception

As she contemplated knocking on the green door that stood before her, the soft plop of raindrops struck the wooden floor beneath Lindsay's soaked feet. Her hair was pressed flat against her head, and even her eyelashes were dotted with droplets. From head to toe, she was completely soaked. She knew she was in danger of getting a cold, but she didn't care. She was more focused on what – or whom – was behind the apartment door that was practically screaming her name, begging for her to lightly rap her knuckles against its aged wood.

On a mixture between impulsiveness and instinct – Lindsay could never be sure what it really was – she had arrived at Danny's apartment building and, as a result, was now standing at his door. For a moment, she scolded herself, but her mind swiftly drew her back to their previous phone conversation in which Danny had literally poured his heart out to her. She knew about his and Rikki Sandoval's rendezvous, about how he had gone behind her back. She felt no hatred for the grieving mother, who had lost her young son Ruben in a terrible accident only a few months prior. Oddly enough, she had not even expressed much anger towards Danny. Instead, she had blamed herself for his actions, admitting that she had fallen in love with him. Right after that, Danny had completely changed direction, like a leaf caught in an autumn gale. He had made several attempts to clear the obvious distance between them, and while it did not solve the issue, it did heal some of Lindsay's wounds.

She held up a clenched fist to the door and refrained from knocking as his words from their conversation echoed in her brain. I swear to God it won't happen again. The truth is, I miss you, I miss you. More than I can say, even if I don't know how to say it. Though he didn't deserve her trust, she believed him. He had lied to her the morning she had called about lunch, making up some excuse in an attempt to sneak away undetected. Lindsay wasn't a CSI for nothing; she knew something was amiss but had decided to hold her tongue. Despite his sin, she truly believed the words he had spoken to her over the phone before she had come to her current position.

She still loved him, and she knew that no matter how hard she tried, she could not, would not, let that go.

Inhaling deeply, Lindsay mustered up her courage and gently tapped on the door three times.

Danny was hunched over the kitchen counter when he heard the knock. Sliding Ruben's funeral program to one side, he lurched off his seat and slowly padded over to the door, where he stole a quick glance through the peephole. His heart lifted. Lindsay.

The old door opened noisily, but both Danny and Lindsay ignored it. They stood there watching each other for a few moments before the former's eyes swiftly cast over the latter's sodden form.

"God Linds, you're soaked. How long have you been standin' out here?"

She shrugged and offered a small smile. "Long enough to do some thinking. Mind if I come in?"

He stepped to one side, motioning for her to enter. As he closed the door behind her, he flicked on a ceiling light and fixed his gaze on the shivering young woman. For a brief second his mind fell into a daze. She's here, in my apartment.

"Um, you have a towel and any clothes I can borrow? I'm sort of…well, soaked."

Danny's head shook a fraction of an inch as Lindsay's voice brought him back to reality. "Uh, yeah. Sorry." He shuffled nervously to the bedroom. From her position in the main room, Lindsay could hear him scrambling through drawers, throwing them open and quickly slamming them back shut. A few moments later, he emerged with several articles of clothing and a large towel, eyes fixated on hers.

"Here, I hope these will do."

"Thanks." As the items were exchanged, their fingers brushed against one another's. Lindsay's cheeks immediately flushed with red, and Danny jerked his hand back awkwardly. "Uh, you…you should change."

The slightest hint of a smile played on Lindsay's lips as she shifted past him, her feet making squish-squish sounds against the floor. The bathroom door quietly clicked shut, but instead of throwing off her cold clothes, Lindsay found herself staring into the mirror, feverishly wishing her and Danny could go back to the way they used to be.

Like a gentle wisp of smoke against the wind, steam escaped from the cup of hot chocolate Danny had just poured. While Lindsay was changing, he had decided to make her a mug of the soothing drink, knowing she had had to be freezing from being in the rain. The downpour had somewhat ceased, though it was still strong at certain points. Danny wondered just how long she had been standing outside his apartment door.

Setting the mug on the table next to him, he sat down on the coach and closed his eyes, thinking back to a time when everything seemed right. Lindsay had walked into his life without anyone telling him. He had not expected to fall so hard for someone. Love was not a notion Danny had ever experienced, and for a while he had convinced himself that he would never find the right woman. Besides, he had enjoyed casting his wandering eye over the many fine ladies of New York City…until Lindsay came along.

The girl from Montana was a feisty little thing. In the midst of his reverie, Danny smiled as he recalled her tough attitude and how she had never seemed to be rattled by his constant prodding and teasing. Despite her hard exterior, Danny had known that her heart was thirsty for revenge. Something or someone had hurt her in the past, and Danny had desperately wanted to find out, but she had kept it from him. The stubborn country girl, who had tackled a suspect on her first day in the NYPD, was harbouring some tragic secret that she would not speak of. But then the time came for her to face her demons, and Danny had nearly gone insane. She had flown back to Montana to testify against the murderer of her friends, one Daniel Katums. Riding on about two days with no sleep, Danny had jumped on the first plane headed for Big Sky Country with steel flecks of determination in his oceanic eyes. She had faltered before his arrival, but once he had entered the thick courtroom gates, he saw the grey disappear from her gaze, the same grey that had temporarily distinguished the constantly burning flame in her chocolate irises. His mind's eye seemed to illuminate the moment when her hand reached over to grasp his. How he had greedily drank in the sensation of their skin touching; it was almost if some long-ago force had purposely molded the curves and crevices of the limbs, so that when the time came, they would fit perfectly together.

And then the kiss.

Well, almost. Danny's surprise at Lindsay making the first move had swiftly dissolved to annoyance as the horde of curious reporters flooded into the courtroom, practically throwing their microphones and tape recorders in the faces of the young couple who had just scored a victory. Their lips were just about to meet – Danny could still see the grateful smile on her beautiful features – when a rude flash coloured their vision with sparkling dots for a split second. That was when the reporters barged in, and Danny had wasted no time in shoving through the crowd, his menacing eyes speaking for him as he glared at the reporters, who had slowly backed away and created a path for them to walk through.

He loved everything about her. How her hair swayed from side to side as she walked, as if it were taunting him to run his fingers through its strains, and how her mysterious eyes always mesmerized him, forcing him into some deep trance. He loved the way her body curved, how her laugh lit fireworks in his heart, and the delicacy of her skin. Danny found himself questioning whether or not he would ever touch it again.

He hung his head in his hands, tears threatening to spill from his eyes. This is all my fault, he chided himself. If I hadn't run to Rikki, I wouldn't be in this mess. Louie must be rolling around in his grave right now; if he were here, he'd give me a good whack upside the head and tell me to smarten up. How could I screw up the best thing that has ever happened to me?

His thoughts were interrupted when the bathroom door creaked open and Lindsay stepped out, clad in a pair of jeans and a warm fleece. Her hair was up from her neck, tied back in a rough ponytail. As she emerged from the light that emitted from the ceiling above her, the rays danced around her features, but despite that, Danny could still see pain echoing in her gaze. I caused that pain.

"Feelin' better?"

She gave a small nod. "Yes, thank you. I appreciate the towel and clothes."

He gestured to the cup resting on the table. "I made you some hot chocolate. Thought it would warm you up."

She slid over to the loveseat that sat beside the couch, the same loveseat that they had often laid in together while watching a movie or the Yankees game, encased in one another's arms. Gripping the hot mug with both hands, Lindsay sipped the liquid and smiled as it immediately warmed her body. "You didn't have to."

He shrugged, but said nothing. An uneasy silence filled the apartment as both became trapped in their own painful memories that had gathered over the last few months. Finally, it was Danny who broke the stillness.

"I'm glad you came."

She peered into her drink, voice slightly raspy. "I was about to turn around and go home, but something urged me to keep going."

"I'm sorry, Lindsay. I'm so sorry. I never should have pushed you away. My grief almost drowned me, an' because of it I became blind of everythin' that was in front of me – includin' you. I was supposed to protect Ruben, an' I failed. After that, I became afraid that I wouldn't be able to protect others I love. The more I became immersed in my guilt, the more I realized I was losin' you. You were only trying to help me, an' in my grief I pushed you away."

"Was she good?"

The question surprised him, but she had the right to know, so he answered truthfully. "No. She wasn't you."

When she didn't reply, he explained further. "That was nothin' but guilt sex. Rikki was going over the edge, an' I had to catch her. In doing so, I was the one who tumbled. That night, I wasn't thinkin'. That night…I was not the real Danny Messer."

A hint of a smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "You were not the Danny Messer I fell in love with."

"I became someone I can't be."

"Maybe it was meant to happen."

He looked up at her. "What?"

"This," with a hand she indicated that she meant the two of them. "There is a saying I've heard before: sometimes two people have to fall apart to realize how much they need to fall back together."

Danny held his silence, for he knew she had more to say. "You lied to me and slept with another woman. You have no idea how much that shattered my heart. Every night after you told me, I would lay in bed and cry, wondering what Rikki had that I didn't, why you chose her over me. Then I realized that your anger over Ruben's untimely death had ruled your heart, and that something had taken over your body. You and I, we have a history. Hell we could write a novel. While the death of Ruben was tragic, perhaps it was meant to occur so it would bring us closer together, to make us remember the history we have written. The resulting distance between us was an eye-opener for me, that maybe, just maybe, this all happened on purpose. Things take place for a reason, Danny. Everything has an explanation."

Danny had been initially devastated by her account of sobbing in bed, but it was quickly replaced by a sense of longing and hope. He voiced his thoughts aloud. "If it takes a lifetime to show just how sorry I am for hurtin' you, so be it."

With a cat-like movement, Lindsay appeared beside him on the couch, staring at him levelly. "Your words and actions have already proved to me that you are apologetic. While that doesn't make you in the clear just yet, it does provide us with a stepping stone."

He clasped one of her hands in his, running a thumb along her smooth skin. Leaning in, he pressed his forehead against hers and closed his eyes. She did likewise, and for several minutes they sat there in silence. The moment was almost peaceful, allowing them to momentarily forget their troubles. Aside from each other's soft breathing, the only sound they could hear was the pitter-patter of the rain against the window.

"Y'know, I think you're right about this whole thing."

Her eyelids lifted, revealing her soft brown irises. "About what?"

"About this happenin' for a reason. Maybe we can't go back an' change what happened, but we can sure as hell write the rest of the chapters."

Her reply was barely above a whisper. "I'd like that."

Reaching up with his free hand, he tucked behind her ear some strands of hair that had fallen into her face. As he did, his fingertips grazed her cheeks. Lindsay shivered from the contact. Suddenly, her eyes brimmed with tears. She blinked once, allowing them to trickle down freely. With the same hand he had just used, Danny brushed aside a tear that was threatening to drop from her jawline. He smiled softly, wishing he could kiss her.

"Let me chase away your tears, love. I caused them, so let me chase them away."

As if reading his thoughts, Lindsay's tear-stained eyes seemed to grant him permission. Without a word he leaned in and pressed his lips against hers, savouring her taste as she did the same. Both had lost track of when their last kiss had been, but it seemed like an eternity.

The kiss quickly became heated, until the point came when they had to break apart for much-needed oxygen. Neither spoke; their gazes provided all the words they needed. Still grasping her hand, Danny rose from the couch and led her to the pool table, which still stood in his living room. He was not about to take her to the bedroom; the mattress had been tainted since his one-night stand with Rikki. He made a mental note to dispose of it in the very near future.

Again, no words were uttered as they undressed each other and Danny lifted her onto the pool table, laying her down gently. Slipping on a condom and throwing a blanket over their naked bodies, he encased her in his arms and gazed into the pair of chocolate eyes that had captured his heart from the moment they had met. Dark swirls of desire and passion flooded them, but mixed in was the pain he had seen earlier.

"Ready?"

"Ready."

Outside, the rain continued to batter the window, but neither Danny nor Lindsay took notice as they made love in silence, the occasional moan puncturing the night air that surrounded them. It was more for comfort than passion, and for the first time in many a long month, both felt content.