WHEN A HEART SKIPS A BEAT
A K-ON! fanfic
By: Ryuamakusa4eva
Summary: Sequel to Blackout. What does it mean when a heart skips a beat? That's right, you're in love...but with who? Unexpected things happened between the new couple. Mio x Ritsu x ...? Rated M for...well, duh.
Disclaimer: if I own it, I swear I'll make K-ON a Mio x Ritsu yuri anime instead *shot* XDDD
A/N: this is my first time writing yuri lemon, please pardon me if the description is weird...( TT A TT)...
Kimi wo miteru to itsumo haato doki doki...
"...Mio-chan...?"
I snapped out of my thought and saw Yui waving her hand in front of me. I blinked twice before mumbling, "...Eh..?"
"It's rare to see you spaced out Mio-chan..."
Then I felt a tug on the sleeve of my blazer, which made me look at the person who sat next to me, Ritsu. She looked at me with a worried look, so I smiled at her and shook my head, as if saying that I'm okay, but she lifted an eyebrow, hinting that she seemed to still feel a bit anxious.
After staring at me for awhile, she sighed and smiled back at me before she looked at her cake and continued to eat it.
It was your fault that I spaced out, Ritsu.
I wish I could say that without hesitation, but no, those words were not able to come out. I didn't, and never had the gut to say something like that. It has always been my weakness, it's hard for me to be honest to myself and say something that I want.
But, I still could tell her through my actions, my innocent actions.
"Ah, Ritsu."
She turned her head to me. "Hm?"
I touched the corner of her lips and wiped a stain of cream away with my finger, then, I licked that same finger as I said, "You have cream staining the corner of your mouth, idiot." She smiled shyly to me, and I couldn't help but also smiled.
Yes, this was one of them, but I never did anything more, I had no courage to do so.
Like kisses, Ritsu had always been the one who initiated it, ever since the 'blackout' on the other day, it felt as if my courage has been drained away at that one time where I initiated, no, more like hinted her to kiss me when I ate the Pocky that I obviously knew was being held by her mouth, and then after that I cut her off of her sentence with a kiss.
But that was it, I did nothing more after that. No courage left to even told her 'I love you' after that day, or to initiate a kiss, or...something more.
Yes, more, as in, MORE.
I exhaled in frustration and grabbed a cup of tea. I brought it up to my lips and started to sip it.
"You know what Mio-chan, Ricchan? You two acted like you're dating these days."
I spurted the tea and Ritsu choked on her cake.
Mugi cleaned up the mess I made and Azusa patted Ritsu on the back. I coughed up a bit before I looked at Yui with a flushed face. "T-There's no way! R-Right Ritsu?" I looked at her, and she stared at me with a frown. This made me confused.
I saw Ritsu then looked away and scratched her head before she stood up. "Uhm...I have to go now..." I looked at her with an eyebrow raised.
"...again?" She grinned at me guiltily and nodded before she went to grab her bag and walked to the door.
The others and I were glancing at each other with a questioning look, we realized that Ritsu had been leaving early lately and we didn't know why. Every time I asked her about it, she would avoid the question and divert the topic, and it made me feel really, really anxious.
"...Mio." I snapped out of my thought and looked up to the person who called me, there I saw Ritsu standing just outside the doorway, waving her hand to me, signaling me to approached her. I stood up from my seat and walked to her with confusion written on my face.
When I reached her, she immediately closed the door. There at outside, while my anxiety grew, she cupped my cheek, pulled my head down and kissed me deep on the lips. Blood ran to my cheeks, as my eyes widened.
I was too shocked that I forgot to retaliate, I snapped out of my shocked state once the warmth of her lips left me. I was about to lean in again, but her index finger touched my lips, preventing me from doing so. No words came out from our lips, she smiled apologetically before she pulled back her hand, waved at me and went down the stairs.
I touched my lips, my face still flushing.
I felt happy that she kissed me, but something just didn t feel right. Not only that she had been acting weird lately, but sometimes, I felt that she was being so incredibly busy that she had no time for me, and lately she didn t talk much with me, and that was definitely weird, it's very out of her character.
A groan came out of my mouth, I shook my head and walked in to the music room. I sat on my seat and glanced at the empty seat next to me before I grabbed the fork and ate the cake on the table that was prepared for me.
"Mio-senpai, do you think that Ritsu-senpai has a boyfriend?" I almost choked on the cake when Azusa asked that question.
Out of instinct, I told her, "N-No way! I mean, she's with m-err, I mean...she's too young for that! !" If I could, I would've banged my forehead to the table, that sounded definitely stupid. I was about to blabbered the fact that I'm with Ritsu so there's no way that she was with someone else, and I felt really stupid.
"Ehh...You're unexpectedly old fashioned, Mio-senpai..." I laughed nervously at Azusa's statement.
But something came up to my mind, from the way she had been acting lately, it was possible that she was with someone else. This made me frown, but I decided to forget it. I believed that Ritsu was not like that. Because... she was with me now...right?
Now I doubted those words, Ritsu was really, truly, acting weird and she was always busy. It was just been around three days since then but she acted weirder and weirder, I couldn't even reach her on the phone at night, and that made me almost mad.
"Guys, today I need to leave early again..." said Ritsu as she stood up.
...That was it.
"What the hell is up with you? ?" I snapped at her and the others looked at me, surprised at my sudden outburst.
I saw her flinch and she looked at me nervously. "I...I have something to do!"
I growled, before I hit the table and stood up. "Like what? Going somewhere with someone?" She looked at me in confusion, as I glared at her.
"...What?"
"Don't 'what' me Ritsu, now you always leave early, and I can't even reach you on the phone at night!"
Ritsu squirmed, she glanced away, not daring to meet with my blazing eyes that showed how mad I was.
Soon after, she stammered, "L-Look, Mio...I have something important to do-"
I pointed at the door. "...Out. Just go and do that...whatever something!"
"...Fine then!" And she went to grab her bag and stomped towards the door. She opened it and left just like that. For a second there, before she left, her eyes met mine, a hurt look spread all over her face.
I sat back on my seat and buried my face on my palm. The room was so quiet, there were no words came from Mugi or Azusa, there was not even any air-headed words from Yui, it was all quiet and awkward, I exhaled to my palm and grumbled.
After a moment of silence, I heard Mugi speak up. "Uhm...how about...we all go to somewhere tonight...?" And there, she had broken the cold, silent atmosphere. It caught my attention and I looked up from my palm to her.
Yui was the one who responded to her first. "Eh? Where to, Mugi-chan?"
"Well...there was this infamous cafe that's just opened up, close from here..."
And then Azusa spoke up. "Oh, could it be Cafe Amour?" What a cliched name, I thought.
"Yeah!"
Yui had an eyebrow raised. "How did you know it is that cafe that Mugi-chan is talking about?"
"It is pretty famous in my class, so I just guessed..."
"Ohh...! Let's go then!"
"I'm free tonight, so I'll come too."
Mugi clapped her hands and smiled, then she looked at me. "How about you?"
I tilted my head and thought, I didn't have anything to do later tonight anyway, thus I nodded. Mugi smiled wider while Yui threw her arms to the air and cheered.
"What about Ritsu-senpai?" I flinched and frowned at the name. Just for today, I really didn't want to hear that name.
Mugi seemed to realize that I frowned and then she looked a bit troubled. After that, she decided to call Ritsu herself. But just like I had guessed, Ritsu declined the invitation and hang up rather quickly, just like what she did to my phone calls lately.
Later that day, I sat in front of my laptop surfing the net with a scowl on my face. That was my way to wipe my boredom away, boredom and annoyance. I still felt a bit of annoyance at Ritsu's attitude these days, but I also couldn't help but felt guilty, I snapped at her and accused her while I had no evidence.
Maybe I should've asked her nicely...
I think I'm a hot headed type, but I just didn t realize it.
While I was still deep in my own thought, I accidentally clicked on the website I shouldn't have seen. When I finally snapped out of my thought, I saw the horrid pictures on the monitor, no, it was not horror pictures.
...It was porn.
I yelped and closed my eyes shut, my cheeks started to heat up. But after trying to avoid seeing the pictures for a while, I hesitantly opened one eye. I was about to close it when I saw one category that caught my eyes.
Lesbian.
I didn't know why, but I couldn't make myself close my eyes when I saw that category. I felt my hand moved by itself and clicked on the category. My breath went faster when I saw the pictures, I couldn't help but picture those models as 'someone'.
When I couldn't take it anymore, I gave in to my desire.
An hour later, I had my head on the keyboard, I didn't care if it typed something random. I was exhausted, both physically and mentally, I felt like I wanted to smash my head on the keyboard without stopping.
I felt really stupid...I had a fight with Ritsu earlier and then I did this with her face haunting my mind...What the heck had just gotten into me?
I looked up from the keyboard, I saw there were a handful of tissue scattered on the desk, I groaned in frustration and stood up. Before I cleaned up the desk, I noticed I had to deal with my messy pants first. I groaned once more.
When I had finished cleaning up the mess, I lay down on my bed and sighed. I stared at the ceiling above me and went into a deep thought. I had been like this for awhile now, no matter if I was mad, or annoyed, the face of that idiot would always appear in my head.
...whether in a good way, or bad way.
I was in a bit of desperation, in a bad way.
Ever since that faithful day, I slowly became desperate of her, I needed more, and more of her...yet, I couldn t say it straight to her face. I felt uncomfortable in my sleep unless I hugged the body pillow while thinking that it was her, I felt the need of her warmth overwhelmed me, I felt the desire...But I couldn't do anything about it...I was too much of a coward to do so.
I really acted like a child.
Another sigh escaped my lips, I rubbed my temples gently to relax my mind. After my mind went blank for a while, I remembered that I had a promise with everyone. With that, I stood up and approached my wardrobe to get some clothes, I decided that a bath before the meeting time would be perfect to clear my mind.
"Mio-chan!" I saw Yui waving her hand to me with a grin on her lips, and beside her stood Mugi and Azusa. I noted that one person was missing, I tried to ignored it, but I still couldn't help but frown.
I approached the others with a small smile, and from there, we walked together to the infamous cafe, Cafe Amour. When we arrived, without hesitation we walked in and felt the welcoming atmosphere of the cafe. It was very comfortable and also suited my taste. I really liked the calm, mature atmosphere.
When we found our seat, a waitress immediately came and gave us the menu. When I stared at it, I couldn't help but feel that it was no different from our 'club activities', but oh well, at least now it was with a different atmosphere that suited my taste.
After we finished ordering, I just stared at the others in silence. I saw Mugi, Yui and Azusa was in their own world, they were talking about the cafe in excitement, well, in Azusa's case, she was just trying to calm Yui down from her over excitement.
I couldn't seem to find the mood to join their conversation, then, I averted my eyes from my friends and looked around to see the interior of the cafe. The color of the wall was soothing, an elegant look could be seen by just staring at the tables and seats. When I glanced at the bar, I stared at the bottles and the glasses that emblazoned the bar.
When I glanced around a bit more at the bar, I felt my heart skipped a beat. There I saw someone, with messy brown hair and unruly bangs, wearing a pair of spectacles. I didn't know why, but that man, made my heart skip a beat.
Maybe it was his looks. His hair might have a messy look, but his appearances were very neat. Or maybe it was his face, It gave off a feminine look, but strong and elegant.
He had this short body, could be shorter than me, but his poor height was overwhelmed by those pair of eyes behind his spectacles that looked like he could stab someone with it. It was very sharp, yet gave off a gentle look.
I didn't know why, but I felt like I ever saw that man's eyes.
I could feel my cheeks heating up, and from the corner of my eyes, I saw my friends stopped talking and looked at me with a questioning look. I snapped out of my trance and looked at them, still with a flushed face.
"...Are you blushing Mio-chan? ?" And then Yui bombarded me with a question.
"Wh-what? ? No! !"
Yui has this naughty expression and looked at the direction that I stared at just now. "Who was it I wonder~? ...Ah! It must be that guy!" She pointed to the bar, the others looked at the direction she was pointing, and I also turned my head.
I raised an eyebrow, the man I just saw was now replaced by someone who had a handsome face and brown hair, but he was tall, unlike the man I just saw who was short. I was confused, but before I could think further, Yui started to babble about me having a crush. I denied it, but she was persistent. Azusa, again tried to calm Yui down while Mugi just smiled at the two of them.
And our orders arrived.
While we ate, we talked about a lot of things, but I did realize that they tried not to talk about Ritsu in front of me. While we were talking, though, my mind wandered off, the picture of that man earlier appeared in my mind, I tried to forget him, but I couldn't.
This, was weird.
This feeling...it was the same as when I looked at Ritsu, my heart skipped a beat when I looked at her, I blushed when I looked at her, but then why did I feel exactly like that when I saw that guy?
Could it be...that my feelings for Ritsu were starting to stray...?
No...no...it was not possible...
I loved her, I do, so much that she could get me into a desperation state, but why did my heart skip when I saw someone else?
Could it be that she was just fazed because he got looks?
No...the way I felt when I saw him...she was not fazed...at that one moment when I saw him, I knew there was one sentence appeared in a corner of my heart.
I want him.
I groaned and buried my face on my palm, I can't believe this was happening. My heart was in a confused state, I didn't know who the heck that I loved anymore. I tried to calm down first, so I could think thoroughly about it later, it was still possible that I was just fazed.
No...I must be...I must be just fazed...
I sat there, staring at the cake in front of me with a blank look before I looked up, and I saw Ritsu eating her cake. I frowned, she didn't talk to me at all ever since yesterday s incident, and she sat in front of me, not next to me anymore.
Yui, who sat next to Ritsu, grinned as she nudged her. "Ricchan! It was such a shame that you can't come last night! Mio-chan has a crush on the bartender there! He is tall and handsome too!"
Oh no.
There was a sound of a fork hitting a plate. I hesitantly looked at the source of the sound, and I found Ritsu with her eyes widened and the fork that she held had fallen on to the plate. I panicked. We were already in a fight, and I didn't want it to become worse than this.
She narrowed her eyes. Her glare scared me. "Oh...so she has a crush...?"
"W-Wait Ritsu! It's not true! !"
No...this couldn't be happening...
"What's not true?" Both her words and her glare were really sharp, I couldn't help but flinched.
"W-Well, it's- -uhh...I.." I couldn't truly say no, since it was the truth, I did have a crush on that bartender. In fact, when I thought about it thoroughly last night, his face was still haunting my mind and I didn't know why.
My fists trembled, I stood up abruptly, it was my turn to glare at her. "W-What about you? ? You never tell me why you always leave early and why I can t reach you on the phone at night! !"
She groaned and rolled her eyes, with a frown she told me, "That's enough Mio." I widened my eyes as I saw Ritsu stood up and her glare was still piercing to my skin. "I'm not in the mood for listening to someone who also doesn t try to listen to me."
The others looked at her and me in turn, they seemed to not understand the situation.
"Wha- -"
"...I feel like one-sided with you lately."
I stopped dead at that sentence, I knew what she meant by that, it must meant my cowardice. I never really did anything to her, no further action, no kisses from me, no 'I love you' words, nothing.
Could she be anxious because of me...? Could she be leaving early...because she was mad at me?
Not only that...this situation worsened when Yui mentioned my crush, something that even I couldn't deny, and I think that was what made Ritsu this mad. Who wouldn't mad at the person who never did anything to her lover, and was said to have a crush with someone else?
Ritsu growled. "That's it, I'm going home." And she went to grab her bag and left, while I just stood there frozen and could only stare at her retreating back.
I had to do something, I had to...but...what?
And I was still standing there, not even trying to catch up with her and explained her.
Why couldn't I just be brave and talked to her? Why must I have this cowardly, childish personality?
"Mio-chan..." I heard Mugi spoke up. I turned my head to her. She, and the others had the same questioning look. They seemed to realize there was something behind our fight, something more serious.
I averted my eyes away from them. "I...I m-uhh...also going home..." I couldn't tell them the truth, again, because of my cowardice.
I was really burned out. I sat on the edge of my bed, spacing out. I couldn't sort the problem in my head. But I realized, that all of this happened because it was all my fault, first, I was such a coward that I didn't dare to do anything to pay back Ritsu's affection towards me, second, it was because Yui told Ritsu about me having a crush with someone else.
...and that I didn't completely deny it.
Was this all my fault that we ended up in a fight like this?
Was it because I m a coward?
Was it because...I had a crush with someone else?
A crush...now that my heart skipped a beat for someone else...I didn't want to believe the saying that 'when your heart skips a beat, you are in love'. No I didn't want to believe it, I COULDN'T believe in it.
"Ritsu is the only one...Ritsu is the only one..." I closed my eyes shut tightly, I desperately repeated that sentence over and over again. My body trembled when I realized that, I, no matter what, couldn't get that man's figure out of my head.
"No..no...no...I'm just...I'm just fazed...I'm just fazed..."
How? How to forget that man?
"...ah."
A thought came in my mind. I realized, that thinking about it alone won't help, and also, there was also another problem besides my crush. Ritsu still hadn't said anything about why she always left early, and was always out of reach lately.
...A talk.
What I needed was a talk with her.
To be honest with each other...or our relationship wouldn't last.
That was right, I needed to talk to her about everything, and did something to confirm my feelings for her. Since just thinking and talk...wouldn't really help much, so an action was needed.
Still with a trembling body, I stood up, and walked to my wardrobe to grab some comfortable clothes than the uniform that made me feel...suffocating.
Every step I took towards her house was heavy, very heavy. I wanted to just turn around and walked back to my house, but I consciously stopped myself from doing so. If I didn't go and talk to her, I knew I would regret it forever.
I stopped, and looked up.
Now, I just have to raise my arm and touch that bell...but my arm felt so heavy it didn't move an inch. I gulped and tried harder to move my arm, and when it finally moved, I stretched my arm towards the bell...
"...Mio...?" My body tensed up. I recognized that voice.
I turned around to meet a pair of amber eyes. Her expression looked surprised but she toned it down and replaced it with a blank look, with a slight annoyed glint. Ritsu didn't say more, she just stared at me sharply. I looked down to avoid her sharp stare, my hands were all clenched tightly.
I felt a gust of wind went past me. I looked up to see that Ritsu was no longer there. I looked through my shoulder to see her opening the door, before she glanced at me.
"...Aren't you going in?" she asked, her voice sounded...a bit cold.
She walked in and I followed her in, we took off our shoes, and I followed her again. My eyes wandered around, I cocked an eyebrow when I realized that her house was so empty and quiet. I concluded that her parents and her brother went away, again.
We went upstairs to her room, I clutched my pants and nervously glanced at her. Soon we found ourselves in an awkward silence inside her room.
And then she broke the silence. "...You're here to talk, right?" I flinched and looked up to her, before I nodded slowly.
She sat on the edge of her bed, then patted the empty space next to her. With hesitation, I approached her and sat next to her with my eyes not daring to lay any single stare on her. At that moment when I sat close next to her, I feel like I really wanted to stretch my hand to touch her, but I stopped myself.
I inhaled, now I must talk to her, thoroughly. But first..."Ritsu...look...I'm sorry..." Yes, apology, it's the basic for everything.
And then there was another deafening silence, before I heard her mumble, "No, I'M sorry." My eyes widened for a bit, then I glanced at her.
"But-"
"Look, you're anxious that you're that mad aren't you?" She went quiet for a moment before she continued. "...And I'm sorry for snapping at you like that earlier..."
Then I decided to go straight to the point, "Why did you always leave early, Ritsu?"
She fell silent before averting her eyes away. "...I was working part-time."
Ritsu looked down and flushed before she continued, "...for you...and I wanted to make it a surprise for you so I keep silent..." I deadpanned, I looked at her with wide eyes, I couldn't believe what she just said.
Ritsu? Working?
That sounded weird...A working Ritsu was something that never appeared in my head, it was just...weird. And did she just say 'for you.'...to me?
"Why...?" Yes, that was the only thing I wanted to ask her, badly.
"You...said that...you'll even run with me if you should...I...I just..." She looked away, her face went redder to her ear.
Oh my God, I couldn't believe that she took those words from back on that blackout day seriously. I was agape, and when I recovered, I felt tears were ready to leak out from my eyes, the feeling when your lover was really serious towards you was...lovely, and indescribable.
I couldn't help but to fell in love all over again with her, and I had completely forgot my anxiety.
That was it.
I could no longer make my arms that longing for her warmth stay in place and wrapped them around her neck, crushing her into a hug. She gasped and couldn't keep her balance, thus she fell on her bed, made me practically lying on top of her, with my face buried in her brown locks.
My shoulders were trembling a bit, I was trying not to let my emotion got the best of me. Why was Ritsu so kind to me? ...was the question that I always asked in my head, but this time her kindness was too much for me to bear, it made me happy, very happy and moved.
No words came out of our mouth, just a pat on my head, which felt very soothing. I hugged her for a little longer before I let go and pushed my body up, I stared at her straight in the eye and she touched my cheek gently as a small smile tugged on her lips, as I leaned in to her touch.
I felt courage build up inside of me, it was the same feeling as in the blackout the other day. This was it, I must not act like a coward anymore, I had to be honest to my own feelings, I had to show her what I was currently feeling.
With the newly found courage, I leaned my face in as I watched her close her eyes. I followed her suit as our lips touched. I missed her lips so much...
I felt her hand that was on my cheek pulled my face even closer, deepening the kiss. I kissed her passionately without hesitation, I felt her throat vibrated, it seemed to be a groan, and then I felt something moist went across my lips, I obliged to her wish.
Her kisses were making me wanting for more, more, and more...I couldn't help but rubbing my tongue on hers eagerly, she kept up with my pace, but I felt that it was not enough. I kissed her fiercely, something very uncharacteristic of me, making her gasp. I knew she was surprised, and me either.
I couldn't stop, it seemed that something inside of me just snapped and now I was running wild. What stopped me was the need of air, I finally pulled back, but our lips were still inches apart. I felt her hot breath, and I bet she felt mine.
I opened my eyes, to meet a surprised expression of her. When it registered to my head why she was looking at me like that, I felt blood rush its way to my cheeks. I averted my eyes away from her, feeling embarrassed. I felt a peck on my lips. I widened my eyes a bit and glanced back at her, then I saw her lips made a grin, her trademark grin that I found charming.
She sat up slowly, I gasped when our position changed, and now I found myself sitting on her laps. I instinctively wrapped my arms around her neck. I felt her hand brushing some strands of my hair away as she gave me a very gentle look.
Again, something snapped.
This feeling...this feeling of desperation...this feeling...of wanting her...that I had always been feeling since long ago...
"...Ritsu..." I mumbled in a low, almost purring, voice, my tone really voicing what I feel, and it came out beyond my consciousness.
She gave me a confused look for awhile before widening her eyes, it seemed that she sensed something about my tone of voice. I couldn't say anything else, but I still had the courage to do something with my action.
My 'innocent' action.
I rubbed her shoulders gently before my hands went up to bury itself in her brown locks. I curled my hands, pushed myself closer to her, and I tried to fill my eyes with everything that I felt at that time. I actually feel embarrassed that I acted in such way, it made my heart pounding so fast, but I couldn't stop myself, it was as if my body moved on its own, on its instinct.
Ritsu closed her eyes for a second before she looked at me straight in the eye, then she leaned her face to my neck, pressing her lips softly on it. When she started to kiss me there, I felt like as if she was giving me a question, thus I answered her question when she bit the pulsing part of my neck, which was by whimpering her name softly.
She stopped dead, before she pulled back and gave me a questioning look. Another question, I thought. This time I answered her with a chaste kiss. No more cowardice, no more holding myself back. Now I must show her, show her how much I love her. I didn't want any misunderstanding between us anymore, I wanted to confirm my feelings for her.
I pulled back my lips and leaned my forehead on hers, I felt how our breath mingled, I felt her warmth, I felt her stare wandering my eyes. Our faces flushed with a pink hue on our cheeks, both of us felt embarrassed, too embarrassed to actually say anything, or ask anything, we could only depended on our actions and instinct.
We both already knew the sign, we already understood each other on what are our actions meant, but both of us were hesitating, for this was the first time we were in this kind of situation. But I knew one of us has to do something to tell the other that this must continue, thus I tried to be a little bit daring.
One of my hands tried to search for the outline of Ritsu's hand. I found it wrapping around my waist. I touched her hand, I held it and guided it to the hem of my shirt, then I guided it into it, touching my stomach, which made me tensed up a bit.
That sign that I gave her seemed to have told her enough, she started to not hesitate, I followed her suit and not hesitated in my actions as well. My hands went up to the top of her head, touching her yellow headband, soon it was off of her head and I threw it randomly to the bed, once her bangs fell naturally to her forehead, I saw something that made me really, really surprised.
I widened my eyes, couldn't believe at the figure I saw in front of me.
"...It was...you..." After a long while of no talking, I finally could let my voice out, although it sounded a bit hoarse and out of breath.
Ritsu cocked an eyebrow, giving me a questioning look. "...eh...?"
"...The man I have a crush on...was...you..." It seemed that sentence made her realize something.
"Mio...the cafe that you went to...was it cafe Amour?" I nodded, then she continued, with her eyes widened. "...That...is where I work..."
I gasped, couldn't believe what I just heard. "...You work, with male clothes?"
I received a nod from her.
"...And with a pair of glasses?"
"...The manager said that I look handsome that way."
Oh yes, you do look so handsome with glasses...of course, I didn't say that out loud.
"But wait...didn't Yui said that the 'man' is tall?"
"When she looked at the bar, you were no longer there, instead there was this tall guy..."
We fell silent.
So all this time...I had a crush with the one I love all along?
We couldn't help but laugh seconds later, we both felt pretty stupid. Our fight started because Ritsu always left early, which made me anxious, while she actually worked because of what I said, then our fight got worse because I had a crush with someone else, while that someone else was actually herself.
When our laugh subsided, we stared into each other's eyes yet again, smile tugged on our lips. She leaned in, I closed my eyes when I felt her lips pressed on mine, I deepened the kiss by tilting my head to the side.
My hands made its way to her shoulders, squeezing it lightly as I bit her lower lip gently, she parted her mouth, but she didn't let me in, she pushed her own tongue and dominated me instead, I groaned, not a groan of protest, because I like it when she dominates me, it gives me goose bumps and butterflies in my stomach.
Her hands were wandering around when our lips busy with each other, and it stayed at my butt. Figures, she was teasing me, but I let her did what she like, just for this time.
I felt her lips leaving me, and she had her hands wandering up, to my bare stomach and went up a bit more, raising my shirt up a little bit, the cold air that touched my stomach made me have another goose bumps.
When she lifted it up a bit more, I blushed beet red and stopped her hands with both of my hands. At first she stared at me in confusion, but when she saw my flushed cheeks, she retreated her hands and smiled.
"...It's just me..." Ritsu whispered in a very gentle voice as her smile grew. Her gentle voice sounded very husky in my ear, it made my heart beat faster, also, her headband-less figure and those sharp looking eyes- -or more like narrowed eyes because her bangs was blocking her vision- -those piercing through my skin didn't help either.
I was still feeling embarrassed about having to take off my clothes, I looked away and blushed harder.
A small chuckle escaped her lips. "...Then let's turn off the lights."
I looked back at her, just to see another trademark grin from her. Then, I put a thought about her idea, turning off the lights might make me feel less embarrassed. When I had decided, I looked at her and nodded slowly, approving her idea. She let out another chuckle and my face went redder.
I got up from her slowly and walked to the light switch. When I've turned it off, I shivered at the darkness, I looked around cautiously, feeling afraid at the darkness of the room. A gentle voice calling my name was the one that made me calm down, as my fear of darkness lessened. I found a glimpse of her figure from the street light that crept in through her room's window and curtain, then I walked over to her.
The room was really dark, but I could see it...A smile, I swear I just saw a smile formed on her lips.
When I sat back on her laps, that lips immediately went to capture my lips, she truly didn't hesitate anymore. That was when I realized it, Ritsu felt exactly the same as I did, that wanting feeling...she has it, she felt it.
That was why our actions, our instinct, synchronized with each other. Just one simple action, without having to voice it out, meant a whole sentence.
Yeah...I definitely wouldn't regret it to give myself up to her.
My decision was certain, I wouldn't go back.
With me kissing her back passionately, I slowly pushed her down, pinning her to the bed. She let out a small gasp, a bit surprised at my sudden action, but then I felt her lips turn into a grin against my lips, that alone told me that she was teasing me.
I pinched her arm, she chuckled, I grunted and slid my tongue in when her mouth parted, replacing her chuckle with a gasp. This time, I dominated her, I rubbed my tongue on her rather a bit fiercely, and it sent an electric feeling throughout my body. I felt a pair of hands on my cheeks, they pulled my face closer as a groan could be heard from her, she gave in to my domination and rather played along.
It made me feel hot all over, I felt like wanted to take off my clothes right away. While I just thought that, I felt that pair of hands on my cheeks slid down to the hem of my shirt, she tugged it, before she slowly pulled it up. My lips retreated and I looked at her, I was still feeling embarrassed about it, and it seemed that she knew about it.
Again, I heard her ever so gentle voice calling out my name, but this time for a few times, trying to soothe me as she lifted up my shirt.
When I had calmed down, I sat up and let her took it off, once the cloth was off of me, I shivered at the coldness that touch my bare skin and my face flushed. I gasped when I felt Ritsu's hands wandering from my shoulders to my chest, the hands tensed up there for a second, before it traveled down to my waist, her hot touches made me feel warm and gave me goose bumps.
The hands went up again, this time it touched my bra, I knew what she meant by that touch, I looked away and blushed harder.
"...Go ahead..."
She sat up, then she held me closer and gave me butterfly kisses from my neck to my shoulder, I whimpered at the contact of her lips. While she kept giving me butterfly kisses, her hands touched the clasp of my bra, she hesitated for a second before she unclasped it and took it off slowly, with her lips never leaving my skin alone.
My hand clasped my mouth, tried not to let out a moan when she touched my breast. She fondled it with extreme care, gentleness, and with a hint of hesitation as her kisses trailed down, I bit my lower lip hardly when I felt her lips brushed with my already hardened nipples.
A small moan finally escaped my mouth when I felt something moist against my nipples, it was driving me crazy. When I couldn't take it anymore, I pinned her down to the bed, disconnecting her mouth from my breast.
I thought that it was a bit not fair if it was only me having to exposed my skin. I tugged the hem of her shirt, her hand that was on my breast left me, and trailed up to touch my cheek, I leaned in to her touch before I took off her shirt.
She got up a bit so it'll be easier for me to take it off. Ritsu didn't seem to feel too embarrassed, well, I knew she would be like that, Ritsu is not like me, who is a coward, she is brave, and daring, she's too daring that after I took off her shirt, she took off her own bra, almost easily.
Now we are skin to skin, I couldn't stop blushing when I could feel her own breasts on my skin, I felt so embarrassed that run away and went back to my home sounded like a very good idea to me, but of course, I had to brush away that thought, this must continue, I wanted to confirm my feelings with her here, and now.
With both of us already topless, all that was left were our pants. As if she could read my mind, she grabbed one of my hands, and guided it to her pants, I inhaled sharply before I slowly tried to take it off, and while I was taking it off, her hands also worked on my pants.
Now the only clothing we had was the panties, this was it, our last clothing. With hesitation, I touched the last fabric that hid a certain part of her body, I gulped and slid it down to her thighs slowly, while I buried my face in her shoulder, hiding my apple face, even though she couldn't see it, due to the darkness.
When it was off, she worked her way with my own panties, I buried my face deeper onto her shoulder. After my last clothing got off my body, the coldness of the air touched my center, it made me shiver a bit.
I felt her hot breath on my ear, and then she gave some soft kisses on it as she held me closer, our naked skin made contact with each other, her warmth crept in to my body. It felt so good to feel her warmth like this.
This, was the problem. When should we start? Now? And who should start?
Even though I had watched about this...stuff, when it was the real thing, I was completely lost.
Then now what should I do? Get up and...do it?
Wh-What if it hurt her when I did it..?
...My head felt like it was ready to explode thinking about that.
I heard a sigh from her before I felt my body being pushed down to the bed, I widened my eyes as I saw a shadow of Ritsu hovered above me, she bent down her face and stopped inches above mine before whispering, "...I'll handle this..." I blushed for the countless time.
My hands went up and grabbed her shoulders, she closed the gap between our faces by pressing her lips on mine gently, and I wasted no time returning her gentle kisses.
Ritsu's kisses were always gentle, even when we started to get fierce midway. Her kisses might be fierce, but gave off some gentle feel in it, and it never failed to make me feel so...amazing.
I gasped into her mouth when I felt her fingers started to wandering on my thighs, and slowly went to my core, I wrapped my arms around her neck, holding her tightly, while I still didn't leave her mouth, I tried to concentrate on returning her kisses as she gave me a gentle stroke, but my lips started to tremble and forget to move.
Ritsu left my lips and instead gave me butterfly kisses on my neck, I tilted my head to the side to give her more access. I have to bit my lower lip when I feel her fingers spreading my center, before she finally slid a finger, inside of me.
I cried out right into her ear when I felt another finger in before she started to move it in and out, I trembled and couldn't help but clenched her tightly with my arms. She went slowly at first, before she started to move it faster. I buried my face to her shoulder to muffle my moan.
When I felt her fingers curled inside, it accidentally touched one spot that made me shudder and cry out her name, she then moved while her fingers curled, it kept grazing to that one spot.
Since I could no longer hold my moans, I unconsciously bit her shoulder so that I could muffle it, I felt her grimaced.
She kissed my ear as she whispered, "It's okay Mio...there's nobody here but us...and I want to hear your voice..." Her words made me stop biting her shoulder and freely moaned her name for her to hear.
Then she lifted her face and captured my lips before her hand went faster, I moaned into her mouth while my hands found their ways to her brown hair and I curled my hands, pulling it a bit.
My body, especially my lower abdomen, started to feel so hot, my breath went faster and I could no longer control my voice, the pleasure was too much for me. With my hands on her head, I pulled her closer and kissed her rather hardly and forcibly, her throat vibrated, she groaned at my action.
It was as if I lost control of my body, I was unconscious of everything I did, whether it was my voice, which now repeatedly cried out Ritsu's name, or my mouth that kissed her rather forcibly, or my arms that clenched her tightly, and even my hands that was pulling her hair, everything I did was just beyond my consciousness.
When she left my lips who wanted more of her kisses, the insides of my body got hotter and hotter as she kept her pace, what made it worse was the way she repeatedly purring my name to my ear with a very husky voice as she gave hot kisses and licked on it.
And when I couldn't take it anymore, I held her with all my might and let out a loud moan, I felt like my insides clenched her fingers tightly and fluid leaking out of my core while I shuddered violently. She gave me some soothing kisses from my ear to my parted lips that were gasping for air.
She put me down gently and kissed my forehead, I let go of her and she lay next to me, she caressed my cheek with her other hand that was dry, and kissed my sweaty shoulder. I looked at her, I couldn't see her expression clearly but I knew that she was grinning, shyly, I supposed.
Then I realized, that it was my turn to make her feel the same way I just felt.
With my last strength, I got up and pinned her down with both my arms trapping her. My arms were all shaking, my eyelids are heavy, and I was panting heavily.
Ritsu knew that I have no more strength to return her affection, thus she said, "Wait...Mio...it's okay..." She held my shoulders, helping me supporting my tired body.
I was persistent, I kissed her on the lips, sloppily, tried to shut her up. Then I trailed down my kisses from her lips to her neck, and then I started to lick and bite her sensitive skin there, which resulted in a whimper.
But, when I tried to move one of my hands to touch her sweaty skin, my eyelids gave up, they shut close as I lost every stamina I had. In the end, my body fell flat on top of her, and I had my face buried on her neck.
A soft chuckle escaped her lips before my mind lost consciousness.
I groaned and opened my eyes when I heard a ring from an alarm clock, my vision was really blurry that I had to blink few times to clear my vision. When I had my clear sight back, I lifted my arms to where the sound came from and hit a button, thankfully I was already familiar with her room...and her alarm clock.
I lifted my head and my body that was still on top of her, a bit, to see a solemn, sleeping expression of Ritsu, flashbacks played itself in my head, it made blood rush its way to my cheeks.
Not only on the fact that we made love, but also that we were still naked. My eyes wandered around, my cheeks reddened when I saw how firm her arms muscle is, it must be because of the drumming, and that shoulder of hers, I dunno why, but that shoulders of hers were so...fascinating? sexy? broad? I didn't know anymore...and that unruly bangs that went freely on her forehead didn't help either.
Then I frowned, I remembered about something I rather didn't want to remember. It was the fact that last night I fell asleep before I could return her affection...Now I felt so, very, embarrassed. What should I say to Ritsu when she woke up?
Before I could think further, I heard a soft groan, and then my eyes met with her sleepy, amber eyes.
A smile tugged on her lips as she whispered, "Good morning, Mio..."
I averted my eyes from her, still feeling embarrassed. "Morning..." I sputtered.
From the corner of my eyes, I saw her raised an eyebrow. "...What's wrong?" Came a question from her.
"I...I...j-just..."
"Is it about last night?" My body tensed up, she knew why I acted like this.
I closed my eyes, waiting for a sharp comment from her. But instead, I heard a laugh and felt my head being patted. "Lemme guess, you're embarrassed that last night you fell asleep in a middle of it, aren't you?"
No words came out of my mouth, she laughed again and my cheeks heated.
When her laugh subsided, she wrapped her arms around my waist and pulled me into her embrace. "...Really...it's okay Mio..." She whispered as she kissed my cheek.
"But-" Before I could barely said a word, we heard a voice of a woman came from downstairs.
"Ritsu! ! Aren't you supposed to wake up right now? ?"
We tensed up, it seems that her parents went back home last night, or this morning, we didn't know. And we just remembered that it was a school day, not weekend.
"Ritsu? ?" We heard her shout again.
And that sounded...closer to this room.
Ritsu got up abruptly that I yelped and held her tightly so I wouldn't fell, since I was still on top of her.
She looked around the floor. "Shit! Mom's gonna come in!"
I started to panic, then I hurried to get off from her and tumbled down to the floor, she did the same. Then we gathered our clothes and wore them quickly, we couldn't help but blushed when we saw each other's naked body, in a bright room. We looked away and continued to wear our clothes, I tried not to glance at her and I avoided anything that could show a reflection of her.
Right when we both finished wearing the clothes, the door swung open. "Ritsu! ! You're gonna be la- -..ah, Mio-chan? You stayed over again?"
"Y-yes, Tainaka-san..." I answered, while trying to avoid her eyes, as if when our eyes met, the secret that Ritsu and I had would be unveiled.
Ritsu's mother tapped her index finger on her chin as she said, "...Well, since it's a bit late, why don't you take a bath together with Ritsu? I've prepared the bath. Oh well, gotta go back preparing the breakfast, go hurry and take a bath you two." And then she left, she went back to downstairs.
Hearing that one particular sentence made us stand there, frozen.
I thanked God for the countless times when the most torturous time has passed, it was a good thing that Ritsu didn't ask much when I requested to have our backs facing each other when we took a bath, I suppose that she herself felt a bit embarrassed too that she agreed to my idea.
We might have seen each other's bare skin before this, but now was different, entirely different. Ritsu was my lover now, so seeing each other's naked skin was more complicated, since we felt embarrassed easily. Not to mention we just made love last night, in the dark-which made us can't really see each other-and that was our first, so the thing between us about being naked was still a bit awkward.
"Say Mio..."
My body tensed up, my hands that were drying my hair with a towel twitched a bit, I looked at her, and said a bit shyly. "...Yeah..?"
"...You didn't bring your school uniform right?"
"Of course not, sill-" I deadpanned, silence ensued.
...Now how could I go to school when my uniform was at home?
"Wanna use mine? I have some spare that has the bigger size than I usually wear..."
I was about to say 'it probably won't fit' but I didn't really have any choice, plus, she said that she has the bigger size, so I nodded. She walked to her wardrobe and grabbed some uniform for me, when she got it, she gave it to me.
My right eye twitched when I looked at the uniform that was the 'bigger' size from what she usually wore.
"Ritsu...uhm...this...won't fit..." My voice went lower as my cheeks heated up. "...My chest..."
"...It's your fault that your boobs are hug-OUCH!" And my knuckle landed on her head.
She rubbed her head. "Well...I mean, you won't have the time to both wear your uniform...and take your school bag from your house right? Your house is a bit far from here...there's only the time to go there and grab your bag."
I fell silent...she was right, I won't have the time to both wear my uniform and take my bag. With that, I decided to try and wear the 'bigger' uniform.
"Stop laughing, you idiot!" And her laughter exploded to a louder one, I growled and looked down. The way I wore the clothes was Ritsu-ish, because I had the blazer unbuttoned. I couldn't button it due to...my chest, and not only that, I couldn't help but unbutton one button of the shirt, or else it wouldn't fit, and resulted in my chest being...well, a bit seen...
...At least my bra wasn't seen.
And thanks to her uniform, I couldn't even tie the tie correctly, and I felt like suffocating, this uniform was TOO fit on my body. And that was not all, with this TOO fit uniform, I had to run to my house, grab my bag, bow down to my parents, apologize for not telling them I had a 'sleepover' at Ritsu's house, run, but stop and bow at them again, run outside, and then run to the school together with Ritsu.
Thank goodness we weren't late, we arrived to school before the bell, so we sat down on our seat while gasping for air. After I had recovered, I looked up to see Ritsu leaving her seat and stood there grinning at me.
"Uhm, you might want to cover it up a bit more." She said as she stared down at my chest with an amused look.
I blushed and covered my chest with my arms, while my eyes glared at her so she wouldn't let out any laugh.
After school, we went to the club room together, and Ritsu took a seat next to me. I remembered that before we were going out, Ritsu always sat in front of me, and ever since we went out, she sat next to me, thus made her easier to tease me...or touch me, I didn't know.
I also remember that when we were having a fight, she sat in front of me and didn't look at me as much as possible.
...Was that why the others kept on staring at us ever since we went in the clubroom?
Mugi, Yui, and Azusa were staring at us, who were chatting and laughing freely. From the corner of my eyes, I saw them looked at each other before staring at us again with a confused look, they must be confused because Ritsu sat next to me again, and was also chatting and teasing me, while we just fought yesterday.
And Yui finally spoke up her confusion. "...Mio-chan...Ricchan...when did you two make up?"
Ritsu looked at her. "...eh? Err...around...last night." She said, her voice went lower at the word 'last night', while I blushed and looked away.
"Ehh...I see...ah, and Mio-chan!"
I glanced at Yui. "...Yeah?"
"Doesn 't your uniform look...uhm...tight, today?"
"...It's Ritsu's."
"Eh?" The three of them chorused, they all looked at me and Ritsu in turn.
And then soon there was a muffled laughter came from a certain person who sat next to me, I glared daggers at her, with flushed cheeks. I saw her lips turned into a teasing grin, she gave such a...an indescribable look, before she said, "Y'know Mio, I have done some work for you, gave you some clothes, and...you haven't return the favor yet."
I deadpanned, my knuckles felt like wanting to hit a certain head, but I stopped myself from doing so. She was right, I hadn't returned her favor, she had done a lot of nice things, like understanding my cowardice...even though in the end she felt insecure because of it, and she didn't even comment much about me falling asleep in a middle of...that. Saving me from anymore embarrassment.
Plus, I realized that she always showed her affection to me whenever possible, even if when we were at school or public place, she showed every kind of affection out there, be it kissing me gently, holding my hand, hugging me, talking to me with a very gentle tone, or staring at me straight in the eye with every emotion that she felt.
Her affection...always made my heart skip a beat.
My eyes softened, I look at her and smiled. "You want me to return the favor?"
"Wha- - ?"
Her eyes widen in shock when I closed the gap between us, yes, with a kiss, in front of everyone...it was my turn to return the favor.
Ritsu, I wanted to thank you for making me feel this way, for being nice to me, and for everything that you had done to me. And I also wanted to thank you for making me realize...
...It wasn't a lie, that when a heart skips a beat, you are in love.
Because my heart did so, even when I didn't know that it was you back then, that was why I will never regret choosing you.
In the summer, I want to see the sunset in the ocean together, In the fall, I want to walk beneath the changing leaves together, in the winter, I want to make snowmen together, and in the spring, I want to see the cherry blossoms together...together with you.
Even if there will be hardships, even if the society will reject us, I want to be together with you.
...Because I love you, Ritsu.
THE END
A/N: well, I did my best to last at the "M" part, a box of tissue has to be sacrificed writing it though. *runs*
aannnnd...is it only me or Mio became a shoulder fetish here? LOL XDD
teehee, can't help it, since Ritsu seemed to DO have a sexy, manly-ish shoulder, me likey. XP
AND DAMMIT WHY IS SHE LOOK SO FRIGGIN SEXY AND HANDSOME IN THE NEW ED? ? ? ? ? HEADBAND LESS RITSU CROUCHING IS AN EYE-GASM ARGGHHHHH! ! ! !
...hush you, I'm a yuri for Ritsu *got hit by Elizabeth*
OMAKE
"So...you two are going out?" asked Mugi, both me and Ritsu just nodded shyly.
"I see...anyway, Ricchan, you might need a band aid, your mosquito bite looks a bit bad."
We froze up.
Not only at the sentence, but at the fact that she smiled...so brightly, TOO brightly.
lulz, what a weird omake, and Mugi FTW X9
btw, at the end, when Mio said stuff about summer, fall etc...I quote that from a (yuri) manga...X3
oh and, THANK YOU SOSOSO VERY MUCH FOR BETA-ING THIS FANFIC GAY-CHA-err, MUGI-CHAN! (Gasian Gaond)