A trip 2 the barbers

A short comedy bleach fanfic.

Yumichika and Ikkaku and Kenpachi and Yachiru

By anonymous member of the Yume FanFic Society

"Wake up! Wake up!" I woke up to the sound of Yachiru... AGAIN. "Ohiyo kennie! Ken chan, you promised today you were going to get a haircut! Let's go! Let's go!" I groaned... "It's got that bad it? Fine. Lead the way." in reply vice-captain Yachiru squealed: "Ooo. GOODIE! It's a good job you wear all your cloths to bed kennie, we can leave straight away!"

Shortly later I was out of the captains quarters... Bored. It was a boring day, the type where you had work to do... And nobody to fight! Life is dull when you got nobody to fight. I sighed. Oh well.

I passed a few men from my squad; they slapped their fore heads as I passed leaving giant lumps behind from their brute strength. "What was that for?" I asked. In reply the group of men stood to attention. As one they said "Lieutenant Yachiru orders sir it's called the numpty salute sir. It is the new drill maneuver you requested as you passed sir. We have been practicing all night sir! "I was just about to say something when Yachiru who was sitting on my back said "What do you think Ken sama? It's really good isn't it! Squad 11 is so so stupid that they believe everything I say! Hehe... Uh oh they look angry Kenpii." Sure enough the small group was enraged. "Oi get her" somebody yelled.

"Run horsey san, run. Quick through that wall over there!" I ran at the sound of Yachiru...AGAIN. Straight into a wall. Well through the wall. All around me kido attack where being launched aiming for the vice-captain on my back. I laughed FUN AT LAST!

"This way kennie! It's a shortcut to the hairdressers! We need to hurry! You made that mob back there so angry ken chan! Also the barber shop shuts in 7 hours how will we ever find it in time?" Yachiru said with a happy grin on her face. She was pointing toward a dark alleyway...

"Yay, Kennie! We did it, we out ran your men! Hurray!" Yachiru squealed with delight. "We're lost aint we" I replied..."Yup" she said "you are always getting lost Ken Bo. It's a good you you got me for directions and we still have 3 hours! I remember it was...Ugh through that wall!"

Behind the wall stood the Barbers. "Told ya so!" Giggled Yachiru. I was tormented by the sound of Yachiru... AGAIN. The barbers shop was nothing special. In fact it was much like every building in the sole society. Short and Japanese on the outside. Massive and American on the inside. Except inside this shop was Yumichika and Ikkaku.

As I entered I was greeted by a loud slapping sound. "What was that?" I said aloud. Suddenly, Yumichika and Ikkaku appeared, standing at attention. As one they said "Lieutenant Yachiru orders sir it's called the numpty salute sir. It is the new drill maneuver you requested as you passed sir. We have been practicing all night sir! "

"Um . . . Carry on!" I said "why are you two here?"

In reply Ikkaku said "why else? We are cutting! ...Hair"

Blushing Yumichika said "What Ikkaku is trying to say is he destroyed so many buildings that we need to work here part time to pay of his debts! Don't worry we are pro hairdressers so which one of us do you want to cut your hair sir?"

"I know, I know! Kennie wants baldie! You are both hair cutters and Ikkaku is best at cutting! It's a riddle! You both cut each other's hair Ikkaku turned out bald and Yumichika turned out beautiful Ikkaku is besty!" Yachiru happily announced.

"I pick Yumichika" I said. I was NOT going to be commanded by the sound of Yachiru... AGAIN. So my haircut began.

"That will be 999999¥ please" said Yumichika. "Ok" I said "just let me see what I look like". I glanced at the reflection in Ikkaku's head. Everyone said:

"You"

"Look"

"FABULOUS!"

End.