Don't Let The Fairy Drive The Bus!
By Snapegirlkmf and CJ Moliere
Authors Notes: This takes place after the events of The Gift Thief Mishap
The holiday break was over and it was time for all of the children in Storybrooke to go back to school...whether they liked it or not but Killian Gold was a boy who enjoyed going to school to learn new things he could use once he reached adulthood again. This time he would not be sailing the seven seas as a bloodthirsty pirate. Sailing was still in blood but now he wanted to join the Navy or run his own boating business. He was also excited to be back in class with his fellow Nevengers and over Christmas he gained new members in three of the four Molk children, the niece and nephews of Archie Hopper's twin brother David Molk. The Molk children were also mages that Rumple and Regina had started tutoring once they were restored to their adult selves.
Killian was out of bed before his Batman alarm clock rang pounding on the bathroom door.
"Hey Henry, you wanna hurry up in there! M'gonna be late!"
"Aww calm down will ya! I'm almost done!"
"You always say that then you take longer!"
Henry opened the door, smirking. "Wait till you're my age and we'll see who takes longer in the bathroom."
"So why were ya in there so long?"
"I had to shave."
"And you cut yourself again." Killian pointed to the small spot of blood on Henry's cheek.
"Yeah but I'm still learning. Now get in there before you are late."
Over at the Majestrix house Sapphira was grumpy at having to wake up so early for school. She detested the idiots she had to deal with there-including Mary Margaret her teacher.
"I don't want to go to school today," she pouted.
"You need to go to school Sapphira," Melanie said firmly.
"What for?" she grouched. "It's boring and stupid! Why can't you just homeschool me?"
The thought had crossed her mind but she was hoping that being able to interact with other children would eventually soften her daughter's heart and spare her the agony of living in the darkness that waited in her future.
"You need to be around other children your age. It's not healthy to have no kids to play with," she retorted, thinking that was the mistake made the first time-segregating the princess of the High Fae behind palace walls and forbidding anyone not of her station to play with her.
"I don't want to play with them!" her daughter growled. "They're all dumb!"
Actually, the other children refused to play with her once they got a taste of her snooty attitude, though Sapphire refused to admit it. She always had to be right.
Melanie sighed. "Child, your attitude is the problem. Nevertheless you WILL go to school. Now get dressed, I have your omelet waiting downstairs. If you don't hurry it'll be cold. And if you miss the bus you'll be late and walk to school."
In the kitchen Bae finished packing the boys' lunch while Aria sat in her high chair watching Olaf's Frozen Adventure. Emma went into the station early to get some of her reports finished before she and Charming went out on patrol.
"Missed again, didn't you?" Bae chuckled when he noticed the cut on Henry's cheek. "Don't hack at it son or you're gonna have scars all over your face and your mothers will kill me because they think I didn't teach you properly."
"I won't Dad."
"I'm ready for school Dad!" Killian cried.
"Eat your breakfast first."
"Not gonna have time!' he whined.
"Yes you are. The bus won't be here for half an hour yet."
"Okay," he began eating the eggs, toast, and delicious sausage.
"Mmm! This is better than the other kind we usually have," he told his papa.
"That's cause it's the venison one Robin gave us after he got that deer last week." They also had a roast and several steaks.
Killian laughed. "I told Jasper we had so much we could give them some but he said his Mommy and Daddy don't like venison, called it gross."
"It's not," Bae disagreed. "It's the leanest meat around here and it tastes great when you prepare it right. I would have killed to eat this when I was growing up."
Meat of any kind had been a treat growing up the son of a poor spinner, he thought. They most often had bread, cheese, or oatmeal for supper along with whatever fruit was in season and eggs.
"Mister Molk can't cook fish in the house when Missus Molk is there because it makes her puke."
Bae coughed. "They expecting, Killian?"
"Nope she just doesn't like seafood."
"Too bad. I love it," Bae remarked.
"Dad, you love all food," Henry laughed.
"You're right. Because when you grow up poor as dirt all food tastes great," his father grinned. He was the least picky eater in his house.
"Didja give Grampa some?"
"I sure did. He's making a roast with bacon, onions, gravy and taters tonight," Bae licked his lips. Rumple knew how to cook game and his venison roasts were amazing. People who didn't know what they were eating swore it was beef.
"I hope he invites us for dinner," Henry said.
"He already did. You know your grandpa, he never lets his family go hungry," Bae laughed. Not that they were anywhere near starving, but Rumple liked to feed people.
"What's for dessert?" Killian wanted to know.
"It's a surprise. You can think about it on your way to school." Bae clapped his hands. "Hurry up, buddy. Don't wanna miss the bus."
Killian drank the last of his orange juice, hugged Aria goodbye, then grabbed his jacket and Batman backpack and ran to the door. "C'mon, slowpoke!" he called to his brother.
"Ah, keep your shorts on, squirt," Henry laughed, eating his last piece of toast. He shrugged into his leather jacket and grabbed his pack also, then they walked together to the bus stop.
The Carlyle and Molk children were already at the bus stop with their mothers when Melanie emerged from their house with a still pouting Sapphira.
Killian ran over and high fived his friends, and Annie muttered to Bobby that Sapphira had that look in her eyes-the one that meant she was gonna unleash mayhem on whatever poor unfortunate soul crossed her that day.
"Kinda reminds me of the way Daddy said Melanie used to be," Jasper whispered.
Devon nodded in agreement. "She showed up at Mommy's sixteenth birthday party and cursed her, just like she cursed Gramma when she was born."
Killian whispered, "Yeah, but Melanie's reformed now. And I think Sapphira's worse than even she usta be. S'what Grandpa Gold says anyway."
"She's got a cold heart but I dunno if true love would melt it," Cami mused.
"True love will only do that if she allows herself to love someone in return," Henry answered. "But you have to be able to feel compassion and empathy for another before true love will work."
"Elsa always tries to be nice to her but Sapphira just ignores it."
"Someday she's gonna regret it," Killian predicted.
"We hope so because Elsa's nice to everybody no matter how mean they are."
Sapphira let out a loud aggravated sigh. "Where is this stupid smelly bus? I swear, if I was driving it'd already be here!"
"Yeah and we wouldn't be on it," Bobby whispered.
Annie shuddered. "That would be a nightmare."
"Phira..." Elsa called out from her stroller and waved.
Sapphira rolled her eyes.
"See," Cami grumbled.
Killian scowled. "Musta left her manners at home," he said loudly.
"Like you'd know what manners are, bilge rat," Sapphira spat.
"I know to be nice when someone else is bein nice," Killian retorted.
Sapphira put her nose in the air.
"No wonder she doesn't have any friends," Annie said to Bobby. "Acting like Miss Priss nobody wants to be friends with a girl like that."
Before Sapphira could respond, the bus pulled up with a swoosh and a groan of the breaks.
"Finally!" she huffed, then shoved Annie out of the way so she could get on the bus first.
"Hey watch it butthole!"
Sapphira stuck out her tongue, smirking nastily.
"Keep makin' faces like that an' you're gonna remain that way!" Killian cried, repeating an oft-heard phrase of Rumple's.
Beth and Peri shook their heads.
"Just once I'd like to see that girl learn how to be nice," Beth muttered.
"Poor Melanie," Peri sighed. "She tries so hard, but that one . . . she's a cold fish. Like some of the repeat offenders Nick used to deal with."
The bus drew away, some of the kids waving as it did so.
"She reminds me of one of David's exes. I can barely say her name without wanting to strangle her. She worked in a club, tried to tell him she wasn't stripping but I knew better. She was also running a prostitution ring, running drugs and laundering money. He thought he loved her but she just wanted him to get her a deal. Once she had that she took off."
Peri's eyes widened. "David was involved with a stripper?"
"He's not proud of it, believe me. She played the sweet little girl act too well, She tried to come back after we got married to try to win him back but we both told her to hit the bricks. We had our memories back by then anyway."
"Good riddance!" Peri snorted. "Some of the suspects and witnesses Nick had to deal with were like that-but he just became the Frost King around them and they backed off. It's not easy-being the wife of a cop."
"David did after Alyssa was out of his life and believe me honey, I know. Even when we were divorced I always lived in fear I would get the call that he was killed in the line of duty."
Peri shuddered. "Me too. And then when those crazy sorcerers kidnapped my babies in Orlando-I nearly went postal. That's part of the reason we moved here, because it's not like the big cities."
While that was true, little did the two mothers know of the catastrophe that was soon to unfold despite the sleepy small town nature of their new home.
Seconds later Beth's phone rang. "Excuse me a moment Peri. Hi honey! Wait...what? Okay, okay….call me when you get there."
She hung up the phone. "I'm sorry Peri but Selene just went into labor and David's taking her and Archie to the hospital."
"Oh boy! Hope everything goes okay," Peri said. "Well, gotta get back to the shop. Time to open."
Meanwhile, on the bus, Larry, the bus driver, who was a cousin of the seven dwarves, fought against the fatigue that threatened to seal his eyes shut. The burly man hadn't gotten any sleep last night, plagued with recurring bouts of insomnia, and now he felt as if the Sandman had come and poured concrete into his eyes.
Gotta get me a cup o'Joe, he thought blearily, and he pulled into Granny's diner. "Stay here, kiddies and don't get off the bus! I gotta grab me a cup to go," he ordered. He figured that the kids would welcome a chance to nap or talk with their friends while he went in and got some coffee. He would only be a few minutes-Ruby always had a pot brewing.
"Coffee break, yeah! Naptime!" Henry cheered, and promptly put his head on his backpack to catch an extra thirty winks. So did most of the kids his age.
"Huh. I don't wanna sleep," muttered Sapphira. "I don't even wanna be at this dumb school." She stared out the window and thought about just ditching this whole scene.
"I wish we could get doughnuts," cried one child.
"I want ice cream."
"I wish we could go on a field trip."
That last comment woke up something wicked in Sapphira's devious little heart.
And without pausing to think, she jumped up and crawled into the driver's seat of the bus. The keys were still in the ignition, and she had to wriggle and stand up to reach the pedals but she could reach them.
"Sapphira, what are you doin'?" Killian asked.
"Mind your own business, fart-knocker!" the girl snapped. "You wanna go on a trip? Let's go to Disney World!"
Several of the kids cheered at that.
But Bobby frowned. "We can't do that! How we gonna get there?"
"I'll take you there!' Sapphira declared triumphantly, then she pulled back on the big lever with the round black knob.
The bus shuddered, then it began to move.
"Sapphira, stop!" yelled Killian. "Ya don't even know how to drive!"
"You don't either!"
"I want Daddy!" Cami wailed.
Sapphira ignored him. She had played tons of video games. How hard could it be? If that dummy Larry could do it . . .
Ruby looked up from handing Larry his coffee to go-just in time to see the bus peeling out of the diner parking lot. "Uh, Larry . . . the bus is leaving."
"Ha, ha. Very funny!"
Then his mouth gaped open.
He knocked the coffee all over the floor and raced outside yelling, "Stop! What the hell? Who's driving my bus? Help! We're bein' hijacked!"
Then he saw Sapphira wave and giggle evilly through the window as the bus careened down Main Street.
"I'm callin Swan!" Leroy yelled.
"That crazy rotten little kid!" shouted Larry. "Don't let the fairy drive the bus!"
Henry was wakened from his nap by kids crying and screaming. "Huh? What's happening, bro? We crash or something?"
Jasper Molk was holding his terrified sister. "I don't wanna die like those kids at Whitman!" she sobbed.
"That butthole is crazy, Henry!" Killian exclaimed.
"Oh . . . crap!" Henry groaned when he realized what was going on. "Sapphira, what the heck do ya think you're doing? Turn the bus around now!"
Annie screamed as Sapphira plowed through a red light.
"Yeah only adults can drive!" Devon Molk yelled.
"Hey, Butt Muncher, red means stop!" Bobby cried. "Don'tcha know the rules of the road?"
"Shut up, dumb butt! I make the rules!" Sapphira grinned, and honked the horn as several cars scattered to avoid being side swiped.
Several minor accidents occurred.
Some kids began feeling sick since the bus was jerking and swaying like a seasick walrus, thanks to the young fairy's driving skills.
"I wanna go home!"
"Jasper I gotta throw up..." Cami groaned.
"Aww crap!"
Annie removed her lunch from her brown bag. "Here, use this! S'what they do on a plane when you're sick."
Cami took the bag gratefully.
Sirens blared in the distance as Sheriff Swan-Gold began pursuing the runaway bus in her police cruiser.
"Go Mom!" Killian yelled, peering out the back of the bus. "Arrest the Butt Muncher!"
"Lock her up!" Bobby and Annie chanted.
"Molk, Carlyle, I am in pursuit and need a roadblock set up ASAP!"
"On my way!" David radioed back. "Archie, it's gonna be okay..,the ambulance is coming."
"Ohhh I dont wanna have the baby here!" Selene groaned from the backseat of his squad car.
"Go...get the kids," Archie urged his brother.
"Be there in three, Sheriff!" they heard Nick reply and soon more sirens were heard.
David's car was stranded in the middle of the accident scene.
Belle looked up from shelving an H cart of books to see what all the sirens were about. Had the town been invaded again?
She dropped a copy of Crime and Punishment on her foot when she saw the bus speed by, and gasped. "OMG! Is Larry drunk?!" She speed dialed Rumple's cell, he was out taking Miri for a walk. "Rumple! What's going on? I saw the bus go by-like it was in a drag race!"
Her husband picked up, he had just reached the corner of their street and Main. "Belle, something's going on with the bus, there's accidents all over the street," he began.
A frightened Miri began to wail.
"It's okay, little dearie," Rumple soothed. "Papa's here. The sirens are scaring her."
He moved to pick up his baby girl . . . just as Sapphira spotted her old nemesis.
The former fairy still held a huge grudge against him, for things both past and present. And she was not about to let bygones be bygones.
"Stop the bus you psycho! You're gonna hit Mister Gold!" Jasper yelled.
"That's idea!" she shrieked. "I'm playing Gold roadkill!" She gunned the engine. "Let's see how ya like playing chicken, Rumple!"
"I'm gonna freeze her!" Cami cried.
"You can't cause Mister Gold bound our magic," Devon reminded her.
"I wanna try!"
"Grandpa!" Killian screamed in horror. "Him and Miri are gonna be killed!"
Rumple looked up to see a familiar face in the windshield, wearing a grin that would have put Satan to shame. He swore and grabbed Miri, teleporting away just as the bus jumped the curb. "Bloody fucking HELL!"
"Henry can you drive this thing?" Killian asked him.
"Uh . . . I can try . . . but we gotta get the little witch outta there."
"Let me freeze her!"Cami pleaded.
"Okay, if you can do it, I'll drive," Henry whispered to her.
The bus skidded around a corner as Sapphira tried to evade Emma. "So long, sucker!" she hooted.
Cami crawled out of her seat and crept up the aisle, her fingers sparkling with magic, unaware that the bounds Rumple had placed on her ice powers had been lifted for such and emergency.
Bae was home watching cartoons on the couch with Aria when he heard the most incredible and frightening report come in over the police radio in the living room. "Hopping hells! Killian and Henry are on that bus! C'mon, Aria-we gotta go rescue your brothers before that fanatical fairy makes them toast."
He put Aria in her infant seat and hauled himself into the Escape.
Nick's squad car skidded to a stop and David jumped in.
"Damn crazy kid!" Nick cursed.
"Rumple, are you okay?" Belle was yelling frantically into her phone. She had seen from the window the bus jumping the curb. Half hysterical with fear, she raced out of the library down the sidewalk. Please, please not my baby or my husband! she prayed desperately, kicking off her shoes to run faster.
"We're all right, sweetheart," Rumple answered, holding the phone in one hand and a screaming Miri in the other. "I . . . I teleported us away before . . . before . . ." he found he was shaking in delayed reaction, unable to speak coherently for a moment.
You're okay, Gold, you're okay-and so is Miri, his mind babbled as he continued to hold his baby tight.
Belle spotted him and dashed over, hugging him so hard he nearly saw stars. "Thank God you're all right! My poor baby!" She covered Miri and Rumple with kisses, tears flowing down her face. Her feet were freezing but she didn't care. All that mattered was her family.
"Calm down, dearie," he managed to say, after getting his own heart to settle. "I just hope Emma, David, and Nick stop that little menace before she hurts our kids."
He fingered his pendant. 'Maybe I ought to . . ."
"Rumple! Rumple!" they heard Archie call out.
"Archie, what are you doing?" Selene yelled. "Ohhhh!"
"Selene, honey...we gotta get out of this car..."
"The ambulance is coming."
"Not soon enough!"
The Master of Light and Dark looked up to see his two best friends coming towards him, Selene clutching her belly and leaning on Archie. "Archie, mon, what are ye doin'?"
"Selene's in labor...and David sent for an ambulance but...with all that's going on...we don't think it'll get here in time."
"Selene, how far apart are the contractions?" Belle asked, jiggling a still-sobbing Miri on her hip.
"Ten...ten minutes.." she panted.
"Rumple . . . she's right. With all the accidents, the ambulance will never make it here in time." Belle said quietly, concern in her cerulean eyes. "And you know you can't teleport with a pregnant woman in labor."
"I know, Belle, I know!" the sorcerer cried. He handed Archie a handkerchief to mop Selene's brow. "But surely you dinna mean what I THINK you mean?"
"We have to!" she said leaving no room for argument.
"Belle, I'm no' a doctor," he began.
"I guess you'll have to learn, won't you," she giggled. 'Your magic will guide you."
Her husband looked horrified. Then he muttered a prayer and said, "I dinna have much of a choice, do I?" He waved a hand and a tent woven of grass large enough for the four of them appeared on the sidewalk. "Get in there, dearie," he urged Selene. "If we're gonna do this, I'll not have you on display for the town t' talk about."
"I'll be on display enough with you looking at my bloody...parts!"
"Selene!" Archie gasped.
Inside the tent was a table with a pot of boiling water, a cloth with scissors and a fishing line, and a comfortable looking bed and towels.
"What are you using fishing line for!?" Archie demanded. "You're not going to...try to fish it out...are you?"
Rumple waved a hand and his clothing was transformed into scrubs, gloves, and a mask and so were Archie's and Selene was in a hospital gown. "'Tis the best I can do on short notice, Hopper! And no, it's to tie the cord."
"Okay, okay, no need to bite my head off!"
He eyed Selene. "Okay, dearie. I need you to . . . err . . . lie back and . . . think of England while I . . . err . . . examine you . . ." he said awkwardly.
"I'd rather think of being on the beach..." she said slyly. "Like on our honeymoon."
Archie coughed nervously. "Right...ummm...just relax honey."
Rumple thanked God he had watched all those live births on TV. And he had watched Emma birth Aria and assisted with Miri. Plus his magic was guiding him.
He carefully, lifted Selene's gown, gently touching her and allowing his magic to assess the baby's position.
"Mum is never gonna believe this," she said.
"What do I need to do, Rumple?" Archie asked.
"Just hold your wife's hand," he instructed. "The baby is doing fine. Relax, Selene. Breathe, dearie," he said, and muttering a spell to disinfect his hands, quickly and gently performed an exam.
"Nine centimeters," he reported. "Almost there, dearie."
Miri began babbling and trying to eat Belle's hair.
"You're doing fine, Selene. Archie, don't pass out," Rumple ordered.
"I'm not passing out!"
"Better not because I won't revive you," his friend said. He timed the contractions on his Rolex.
Bae drove up and jumped out, taking Aria out of the car seat. "Any word on the bus situation?" he asked Ruby. "How the heck did this happen anyway?"
"It looks like Blue hijacked the bus while the driver was getting coffee."
"Say what? Jesus H. Christ!"
"I know! That girl is insane!"
Bae shook his head. "You hear if they caught up to her yet?"
"I hope so!"
He looked over to where an odd structure was set up on the sidewalk. "What's that?"
Ruby laughed. "A hippie tent!"
He giggled. "Seriously, why is it there?"
"Let's go check it out."
"Ladies, first," Bae said gallantly, and gestured for Ruby to go first.
Ruby went and lifted the flap. "You guys having a revival in here or what-oh hell!"
"Get out, get out! Oh bloody hell Archie, make them stop looking at my parts!"
"What are they doing, smoking a joint?" Bae queried, peering around her. "Oh Jesus!"
Selene tried to grab the sheets to cover herself.
Archie stepped in front of them, blocking their view. "Well, now that you've seen everything would you please give us a bit of privacy."
"Sorry, Archie. We didn't realize this was a-medical unit," Ruby said, flushing.
"Holy cow! Who's delivering your wife?" Bae gaped.
"Bae, please wait outside," Belle instructed.
Aria reached out to her. "Gammy!"
"No, sweetie," Bae said, hastily ducking out of the tent. "Grammy's busy."
Selene groaned. "Well almost all of Storybrooke has seen me without my knickers now!"
"Not true. Bae and Ruby will keep quiet," Rumple disagreed.
"Or they'll deal with me."
"Just don't worry about it Selene," Archie pleaded.
Rumple checked her again. "It's time, Selene." He said. "All right, now I want you to kneel on the bed, that will help you to push. Archie, get behind her. I'm going to use my magic to blunt those contractions just a wee bit . . ."
His hands glowed and then golden light splintered and settled over the laboring mother. "Better now?"
"Yes."
"I'm right here Selene," Archie said softly, letting her rest her head against his shoulder.
"Now, when you feel the pressure of the next contraction, I want you to breathe three times then bear down-HARD." The sorcerer said, his hands on her belly.
"Just like we practiced, Selene," Archie coached.
Selene began to breathe, thankful Rumple's spell had taken the relentless pain mostly away. She screwed her eyes shut, gripped Archie's hand, and pushed. "Ooohh!"
"Good! Very good!" Rumple coached. "Now relax a bit and wait." His magic told him the baby was halfway down the birth canal.
Selene rocked back and forth, her face sheened with sweat.
"Rumple, how did you learn how to do this?' Archie wanted to know.
"I assisted with Miri and watched some medical DVD's," he replied.
Archie wrapped his arms around her and kissed her forehead. "You're doing great honey, you're doing great."
"Don't . . . talk shite . . ." his wife panted. "Ahhh . . . Rumple . . . feel like I gotta push again . . ."
He nodded. "Another good push, Selene. On three . . ."
Selene groaned.
"Easy, easy . . . I can see the head . . ." Then his tone changed. "Wait . . . wait . . . don't push . . ."
'What? Why?" Selene demanded. "What's wrong?"
"The baby's head . . . it's err . . . a bit large . . . you'll tear if you push again," Rumple said.
"So what are you gonna do? Shrink it?" Archie yelled.
"Rumple...should I push now?"
"Just wait a minute sweetheart," Archie said softly. "And you be careful with my baby!" he barked at Rumple.
"I am!" he snapped back. "Selene, just hold it. I need to make an incision so your baby doesn't rip you open like a melon. I promise you won't feel it," he replied, reaching for a scalpel on the cloth.
Archie's face paled.
"Oh no you don't. Don't you dare pass out on me Archibald Hopper."
"Hush!" Belle ordered. "Rumple needs to concentrate."
"It's okay, Belle. 'Tis done," Rumple announced, calmly laying aside the scalpel. "I'll sew you up later. Three bitty stitches."
Then he said, "Push now, Selene."
She obeyed, and soon Rumple was holding the baby's head.
"Is it almost over?" the mother gasped.
"Aye, dearie. I think two more should do it," he encouraged.
On the bus the other children were silent, waiting patiently for Cami Molk to launch her attack while Henry prepared to take her place in the driver's side and bring the madness to a halt before anyone else got hurt.
Cami stood up, wearing what her mother called their father's 'cop face' and stretched out her hand. "Freeze butthole!"
Seconds later the former fairy was encased in a block of ice.
"Yeah! Way to go Cami!" her brothers hi-fived her.
"Henry get the wheel!" Killian screeched.
"I got it , I got it," the teenager muttered and pumped the brakes, bringing the bus to a stop in front of the town hall.
He leaned back in the driver's seat and breathed a sigh of relief.
"Okay...everybody out!"
"Oh thank God!" Emma cried and jumped out of her car, Nick and David at her heels.
The children exited the bus single file, all of them singing.
"They're coming to take her away ho ho he he ha ha
Twenty years to life..."
"Someone DOES need to lock that crazy girl up!" yelled an angry mother, throwing her arms around her son.
"Mommy, Mommy, you shoulda seen it. Cami turned that fairy to ice like Elsa!"
"Henry stopped the bus!" another boy was telling his father.
"She almost made Mister Gold roadkill!" yelled Cindy Lou Who.
"I'm so sorry, Rumple," Melanie whispered sorrowfully as she hesitated to approach the parents and children milling about. She feared the recriminations of her neighbors, and wondered if they would turn on her and throw her across the town line-along with her icicle daughter.
"Melanie, we'll need to take Sapphira to the station and we need you to accompany her," Emma said softly.
"Yeah! Put her under arrest!" yelled Devon.
"All right guys, that's enough."
"But Daddy, she scared the heck outta everybody," Jasper insisted.
"And we'll take care of it. Right now I want you to go with your mommy okay?"
"Mom, are you gonna put her in a small cell?" Killian wanted to know.
"Oughta put her in the freezer!" cried a teenage girl named Violet.
"She's already frozen," Cami giggled.
"Yes, and how did that happen Charlotte Abigail Molk?" her father demanded.
"Daddy I HAD to! She was gonna run Mister Gold over an made a lot of us scared!"
"I just don't want you going around freezing people for no reason, okay?"
"I'd better call Bae, see if my father-in-law is okay," Emma said. She speed dialed her husband. "Bae, how's your papa?"
"He's all right, Em. In fact, he's delivering Selene's baby."
"Oh my . . . Gold!" Emma sputtered. "But . . . where's the ambulance?"
"Stuck in traffic probably. But Papa has this under control. You catch that crazy fairy?"
"Done. But Henry and Cami helped a lot. I'll talk to you later, hon." Then she hung up.
"First a fairy driving a school bus and now I just heard that Gold's become a midwife!"
Melanie gasped. "Rumple's delivering a baby? Oh my!"
"Glad that's not me," Nick said fervently. "Wonder how that's going?"
With one last push, Selene's baby was born into Rumple's waiting hands. "Congratulations!" he beamed. "You have a lovely baby boy."
Archie kissed his exhausted wife passionately. "You are an amazing woman Selene Hopper! May I hold my son?"
"Certainly," Rumple said, and handed the wailing baby to his proud papa, after he used the fishing twine to tie the cord and cut it.
"Oh...Archie...he has your eyes..." Selene said tiredly.
"And your temper," he joked.
Belle began snapping pictures on her phone.
"What's his name Selene?"
"Archibald Hopper Junior," she murmured.
"We were just gonna call him Junior or AJ," Archie added.
"Ummm...hello...is my sister-in-law decent in there? I'd like to see my niece...or nephew," they heard David call out.
"He's a good strong lad." Rumple allowed the parents a few moments to bond with the newborn before allowing Belle to take the baby off to be bathed and put in a clean nappy and blanket. Then he finished up with Selene, healing the incision he'd made.
"Wait a moment there, David," Rumple ordered. He waved a hand and the mess from the birth was cleaned up and Selene was in a soft pink gown and wrapper with clean sheets.
"Anyone who says there is worse pain than childbirth is mad," Selene said sleepily.
"I'd have to agree." Belle said, and handed the new mom her son.
A weary Rumple picked up a sleeping Miri from a nest of blankets and clothes on the ground. "Papa's tired too, little imp."
"Okay David you can come in now."
The deputy was also exhausted from running through a traffic jam and worrying about his own children, flashbacks of the horrific school bus shooting he'd responded to the year before playing in his mind until he he'd seen his children get off the bus safely.
"David, are the kids all right?"
He nodded. "Beth has mine at Grannys getting us lunch. Oh I see a lot of us in this little guy!"
"I said the same with Miri," Belle reminisced. "Where's our grandchildren?"
"With Emma. Henry took over driving the bus after Cami froze Blue."
"My grandson did that?" Rumple exclaimed. "A miracle happens every day. Must get his driving ability from his grandpa."
"And ummm...thank God he did because it reminded me too much of what happened in San Francisco..."
"Why don't you come over to the house later David," Archie suggested.
He nodded.
"Rumple and Belle too," Selene murmured. "Dr. Gold needs a bottle of Scotch."
"After that, I sure do," chuckled the former imp.
"Thank God everyone is okay," Belle breathed a sigh of relief. "But what will happen to Sapphira?"
David shrugged his shoulders. "I know what I feel should be done but that's up to the justice system. As long as it's not a slap on the wrist." His eyes narrowed. He'd seen quite a few people get away with murder with just a slap on the wrist, namely the captain of the cold case unit, the admitted kingpin of the police corruption ring he'd helped expose and their former DA Mario Siletti walked on a vehicular homicide after his affair with the prosecutor was revealed during the trial.
"I feel sorry for Melanie," Archie confessed. "She's trying but Sapphira will not give an inch."
"I'd better go help Emma and Nick corral that mob of angry parents." David sighed. "I leave the big city and thinkin I wouldn't have to deal with big city crime and it looks like we have it here too."
"Rumple, you and Regina should talk to Melanie about what to do about Sapphira. I know she's Melanie's daughter but she's out of control," Belle said angrily, the thought of that crazy child trying to run HER daughter and her husband down making her see red.
"You're right, Belle. She almost-KILLED Miri and me," the elder mage said tightly. There really was no excusing that behavior.
Had he still been under the control of the Dark One, there would have been no question about him hunting her down, either. But now . . . now his anger was manageable, but he still longed to do something not quite ethical to the brat.
Outside they could hear dozens of voices raised in anger along with Emma, Nick and David's as they tried to calm them down.
"Look, we ALL had kids on that bus but I'll damned if I'm gonna have a damned lynch mob in this town!" Emma shouted.
"People, please!" Nick bellowed. "Listen, we ALL want justice for our kids, but you all need to calm down and think, not react. This could have been so much worse-I know because I've seen it worse in Orlando. We're all lucky no one got seriously hurt or killed. Now let's try and put this in perspective, okay?"
"And I HAVE seen kids killed," David yelled. "Seventeen of them...shot by their own classmates. "And I've seen what happens when the mob tries to take control of a situation and it does no good!"
One of his fellow officers, Terry English had come under fire from an angry mob when he supposedly shot an unarmed man but later a child came forward after finding the weapon the suspect dropped when he was shot.
"I've heard enough!" they heard Regina yell as she stepped out of her Mercedes. "All of you...take your children home! Justice will be done but but US, am I understood?"
She gave the crowd her best Evil Queen glare, the look that always made people quake in their boots back in the Enchanted Forest.
People began to mutter and back away, though a bunch still were shouting angrily when Rumple appeared beside her and lifted his arms towards the crowd. Instantly there was silence as his magic stole their voices for a few moments.
"Good people, LISTEN to your mayor and law enforcement. And if you don't wish to do so, now you'll listen to ME. I'm one of you-I almost was killed today along with my infant daughter. I know what you're feeling. However, we are not vigilantes. We are a town of law and order, and that is what shall prevail here. You all know me, and you all know that no one hurts my family and gets away with it. That is still true now as it ever was when I was the Dark One. I give you my word as an attorney, a parent, and an archmagus justice will be served. Now go home, all of you!"
He waved a hand and their voices were restored.
The crowd, now subdued, dispersed without any complaints.
Nick whistled. "Damn! I'd give my eyeteeth to know how he did that."
"He just does," David said. "There was quite an uproar when I summoned him to help with Beth...Phillip's whole army tried to attack him and he scattered them like leaves."
"He's the Master of Light and Dark, that's how." Regina declared proudly.
Rumple coughed, embarrassed. "No, dearie, it's over three hundred years of dealing with stubborn, opinionated, emotional people. Experience."
"Okay guys, let's get this scene secured," Emma instructed her deputies. "Gina, you can take Roland home but we're gonna need to talk to him later."
"Right. C'mon, honey, let's go home and have some hot cocoa and you can tell me everything," she cooed to her stepson.
"Mommy, you shoulda seen it. She was drivin so crazy an then Cami froze her like a popsicle...!" Roland babbled.
"She did? But I thought your Uncle Rumple restricted her magic?"
"Ummm...didn'cha say sometimes wards can break if it's a real 'mergency?"
"Yes, that's true. Rumple, is that what happened?"
"It is. My binding would be in effect until it was perceived to be a true emergency, then it would release," he answered.
"Good thing too because I was delivering a baby and couldn't spare the time to go after the Butt Muncher myself."
"Gold, YOU delivered a BABY?" Regina gasped. "Now I really HAVE heard it all! Whose?"
"Archie and Selene's."
As if on cue, the happy couple emerged from the tent, Selene cradling their newborn son in her arms.
"Oh! Let me see!" Regina cooed. "Hello, precious!"
Roland rolled his eyes.
"What's this little charmer's name?"
"Archie Junior but we're calling him AJ," his proud papa replied.
"Lovely. And how are you doing, Selene?"
"Exhausted and it bit embarrassed so many people saw me without my knickers!"
Regina glared at Rumple. "What? Honestly, Rumple! Didn't you have any privacy?"
"We ahhh...did but Bae and Ruby dropped in," Archie said.
"Oh that figures! They always show up somewhere they shouldn't," Regina snorted.
Rumple shrugged sheepishly. "He was always like that, even as a boy. Too curious."
"Mommy, can we go to Granny's..please?" Roland pleaded.
"Umm . . . okay, sweetie." She smiled down at Roland. "I've gotta run. Emma, text me if you need me."
"I will. Okay guys, we need to bring the driver in too."
"You gonna have a blood draw done on him?" David wanted to know.
"We'll have to just to cover all the bases. A lot of these parents are already mad as hell at Sapphira and he's gonna be next on the list. We need to rule out him being drunk."
"I'll leave you to it, dearies," Rumple declared. "I need to get Belle and Miri home, my baby's missed her naptime."
"And I know you guys wanna be with your kids...I do too," Emma was saying.
"You know where to find me, Emma, if you need to discuss legal proceedings and so forth," Rumple said. "Bring the kids by later, we'll have dinner and talk."
She nodded and the three officers went back to work.
Rumple put an arm about his wife and child, then whisked them away on the wings of magic back to his Victorian. He wondered what type of sentence would be appropriate for a five year old fanatical fairy.
That very same question was on the minds of the parents of the children driving the bus, options on what to do the hot topic of conversation over at Granny's where most of the families were gathered.
"I don't envy the judge that gets this case, not at all," Peri murmured while she and Beth were in the restroom. "But some of these kids are becoming violent at a young age now."
Beth nodded. "One of the boys involved in the Whitman shooting was the son of a psychiatrist. He knew the boy was a sociopath but never got him treatment. He led David's unit on a two day manhunt and took a classmate hostage and tried to kill one of the officers before David's partner had to shoot him. He was seventeen. The other boy was eighteen and tried as an adult. He's appealing his death sentence. Melanie is trying, God bless her but I'm afraid it's at the point where something else needs to be done."
"The Butt Muncher is really crazy," Annie was saying to her friends. "Maybe they oughta keep her on ice."
"I dunno if she's gonna stay that way or not. M'not as powerful as Elsa and she prolly melted by now," Cami sighed.
The Professor snorted. "Too bad she doesn't melt like the wicked witch. That'd be an improvement."
Bobby shook his head. "She'd just come back an haunt us."
"Maybe Mister Gold can think of something. Bad or not, she is just a kid and killing a kid is wrong…" Jasper spoke up. "Killing anybody is wrong. Do you guys have a boot camp around here?"
"Nope," Willie replied.
"What if he does like Mister Organa did to Threepio and Rtoo in Star Wars and wipes her mind….that way she won't be so mean?" Devon suggested.
"Yeah. She's so mean because she remembers everything about who she is, just doesn't have magic anymore. If she doesn't remember….it'll be like she's a whole new person." The Professor nodded.
"What are you guys talking about?" Peri asked her children.
"Sapphira. They're not gonna kill her, are they?" Bobby asked. "I mean...yeah she did try to kill Mister Gold but she's still a kid."
"A kid that thinks and acts like an adult," Beth pointed out. "But you're right. It would be extreme to…" She couldn't even bring herself to say the words.
"Well what if Mister Gold really wipes her mind like they did to Threepio and Rtoo in Star Wars, Mommy? She won't be mean to everybody anymore because she won't remember all the reasons she thinks she hates 'em." Devon's gaze met his mother's. "Daddy would 'gree with me."
"Beth, I heard Nick say once that eventually Sapphira will become the Dark One. Even if Gold does wipe her memory, it won't prevent that...at least I don't think so," Peri whispered in her friend's ear.
"Maybe it can," Cami said. "Remember the Grinch. His heart grew three sizes once he learned the truth 'bout Christmas."
"Inch!" Elsa squealed, bouncing her Grinch doll on her lap.
"Hey there's Killian and Henry. Over here guys!" Bobby called out and waved to his friends.
Killian ran over to the table and jumped into the empty seat beside Bobby.
"Cool! You're eatin mac n'cheese. Can I have some, Dad?"
"Yeah, hold your horses Killian!" Bae chuckled. "And I'll make sure I get hot dogs too."
"I guess Emma and the boys are still down at the station?" Beth asked him.
"Yeah...brought Melanie, the driver and Sapphira in. She told me to grab them all a bite because they're gonna be there a while."
After he had ordered the three officers food, Bae brought a plate of mac n'cheese and hot dogs to Killian and Henry. 'Here you go. I need to feed Aria then I gotta go bring food to your mom at the station. Will you be okay staying here with your friends till I get back?"
"Yeah, Dad. We'll be okay," Henry assured him.
Bae fed Aria cut up pieces of the same thing his boys were eating, then he spoke briefly with Peri and Beth before he went to make the food delivery. He had also ordered Melanie, Larry, and Sapphira sandwiches also.
Melanie was far too nervous to think about eating, still fearing that the townspeople would want her head on a pike for her daughter's misdeeds.
After a lengthy discussion with Judge Midas, Emma and her officers, as well as the public defender for Sapphira and Larry, called Mario Bonetti, and Mr. Gold, who was the prosecutor for the rest of the families involved, which included himself, it was determined that a public trial would be a three ring circus and they should avoid and settle out of court.
"But we still have to decide punishment Gold," Emma reminded him.
"Yes, I am aware of that. Your Honor, what is normally done in cases involving minors like this?" He knew what would have been done back in their realm but hadn't studied up on cases where a minor was charged with a criminal offense in this world.
Midas consulted a few sites online, then replied,"In such cases we would recommend months of counseling, some community service, and some time in a juvenile detention center. Would that be acceptable or is there a different magical solution you wish to try, Rumple?"
"Sometimes a magical solution isn't always the best," the sorcerer attorney mused. "However, I think a spell to limit the amount of damage or restrict her whereabouts is acceptable."
"What about wiping her memories away, Gold?" Emma suggested.
Rumple shook his head. "I don't like memory altering spells for two reasons, Emma. One is that your memories, good and bad, make up who you are. When you regressed Rheul Gorm, the spell didn't remove her memories because it could not. Therefore if I try to, even for a short time, I could destroy her mind. Plus it isn't her memories that's the problem here. It's her entire attitude. That's not something a memory erasing spell can fix. Magic shouldn't be used to alter a person's character or personality. Because it goes too far and warps it. Change must occur because the person wishes to, not because they are forced to by a spell. Because eventually the spell will break or wear off and then you are left with what you had before."
"Okay so she goes to juvie?"
"Yes, with my spell provisions beforehand. And has counseling with a licensed child psychologist who can evaluate her properly and determine the best treatment. From the brief time I have spent with her, I can say she shows signs of narcissistic personality disorder among others."
"And community service?" asked Nick.
"Yes. We can determine what is appropriate for a child her age."
"Will this be enough to save her, Rumple?" Melanie asked, her face pleading.
"We all better hope so or we will have another Alfie Rentman and Dustin Maker on our hands," David spoke up.
"Worse...we'll have a Dark One with no humanity left," Emma predicted.
Rumple sighed heavily. "Melanie, we will do our best. But, dearie, you know as well as I that the choice isn't up to you or me or anyone but Sapphira. No one decides her fate but her, as my wife is fond of saying. Free will is the greatest burden of any thinking being. In the end, her fate is one she shall determine."
Melanie bowed her head. "I know you're right, Rumple. I just wish . . ."
"Aye. But all we can do is hope for the best and prepare for the worst. And you mustn't blame yourself either. Good and evil are choices we make. The choice and the consequences are up to the one who makes them."
"You are wise, Rumple. I value your counsel," she said softly.
"Even when it gives you no comfort?" he asked sympathetically.
She squeezed his hand. "Even then, old friend. Good counsel does not always comfort, which is why it is often taken for granted."
"We have time still," he reminded her. Though they both knew that time was often an illusion and could slip away in the blink of an eye. "Don't give up. I'm not."
"I won't. Until then, I shall hope and pray."
"What of my client?" Bonetti asked. "The blood test determined he wasn't drunk, just extremely foolish and negligent."
"Yes, however that too carries a price. I recommend a period of suspension and a fine of at least $500. If the school board votes, they may terminate employment, but that's up to them. Is this acceptable, Bonetti?"
"Agreed. Let me confer with my clients and we'll sign the papers."
"That poor man will lose his job," Melanie said sadly.
Her lawyer nodded. "That's a good possibility. But maybe not. It all depends. But that's up to the board of ed."
Melanie decided that if that happened, she would hire Larry to do deliveries for her dress shop.
Once the papers were signed Melanie went to inform Sapphira what the consequences were.
Her daughter proved to be intractable as ever, spitting that someday Melanie would regret sending her away and one day she would return and make them all sorry.
"Especially YOU, Gold!" she snarled at the former Dark One.
Bring it dearie! he thought.
Rumple was unfazed. "Be careful what you wish for, Sapphira. You just might get it and find out that it's not at all what you wanted."
"Sapphira! Don't you see you are only hurting yourself?" Melanie demanded.
"No!" she declared stubbornly.
"You will." Rumple predicted. But by then it may be too late, he thought darkly.
He cast two spells over her, one a tracking spell the other to prevent her from deliberately harming children. Then he turned and said, "Your fate is your own, Miss Majestrix. Choose wisely."
Sapphira's response was to give him the finger. "Tell it to someone who cares, old man!"
Rumple just shook his head. "I'm done here, dearie." Then he walked out.
The next day in The Daily Mirror, the headlines screamed Don't Let the Fairy Drive the Bus. It detailed exactly what had happened and the subsequent consequences for all involved. Most of the parents and children breathed a sigh of relief that Sapphira wasn't going to be among them for the next half a year.
Several of the children who had been on the bus when Sapphira took it for a joyride signed up for counseling with Archie and Bae, which surprised no one. Once Sapphira had been transported to the juvie center in Boston, Melanie herself signed up for counseling as well.
It was not going to be an easy six months for either of them but Melanie was determined to keep fighting for her child. She knew the pain and loneliness of the darkness too well and would gladly go to the fires if it could save Sapphira from the dark fate that awaited her if she continued her descent.
As for the Nevengers, their reputation continued to grow, as the pint-sized protectors continued to look after the citizens of Storybrooke, averting disasters whenever they could.