* please note; due to complaints i am apparently supposed to call the kiddy-fiddler, "The Doctor", so something like that.
The doctor, River Song and the red-head, came back to the tardis after defeating aliens. There they found Davros colapsed on the floor.
"What do we do with him, doctor. And what's that smell?" asked River Song.
The doctor paused for a moment, looking down at the wrinkly old fart, that had just been created. He also looked at Davros.
"That's disgusting, even Rose Tyler was better toilet trained!" the doctor said.
Suddenly, everything changed. The ginger bird and the doctor woke up in her bed.
"hold on, was that all a dream?" asked the carrot top.
"Either that was a dream, or this is." said the doctor "we have to figure out which reality is real. "
"How do we tell?," said the ginge.
"We look for what we have always missed, in the cormer of our eye,"
Slowly, they both turned around in the bed, and gazed at what they saw on the wall above.
It was a crack. A crack in space and time.
They both gazed into the crack. What they saw may change the world. What they saw could re-write the whole of history. What they saw could be the most important thing in all of the universe. What they saw turned out the be the doctor's willy. They looked at it for no more than a second before, it started to go for a slash on them both.
"I new I should have gone in a bush earlier" said the doctor.
Suddenly the world changed again. The Doctor and the red-head, woke up on the floor of the tardis again. River Song was no where to be found, probably turned back to a child again by now. The doctor and the ginger bird awoke to find themselves sorounded by daleks. A six-foot blue dalek loomed over them both. A bright red dalek, next to it. Next to that, a bold green dalek. And next to it, and yellow one (The sort of colour your wee looks like when you get up first thing in the mourning.)
"Who are you lot supposed to be? The Teletubbies," said the doctor "Who designed you lot, Gok Whan!" .
"I designed them," said Davros, emerging from the shadows in the tardis.
"You look like Jimmy Savile," laughed the Doctor. "Ever wonder why he never got caught, when you've got a friend with a sonic screwdriver you know how to keep people quiet."
"Your anicdotes are unnessessary and deminishing to your kind" said the blue dalek.
"Prepare to be exterminated," said the yellow dalek in a high-pitched voice. Definatley the gay one, thought the Doctor.
"wait one minute," said the doctor. "don't you want to know how to fly the tardis before you kill me?"
"Doctor!" interupted the red-head.
"Not now Amillia Song, err I mean Melody, River, no... Pond, sorry. Have given the secret away?" said the Doctor.
"It's important, I've found another crack in space and time"
"Where?"
"It's kind of arkward. It's in between my..., err it's on my... bottom." said the red-head.
"Prepare to be exterminated, Exterminate. Exterminate" interupted the Daleks.
Suddenly, the red-head had an idea. She lifted up her mini-skirt, pulled down her undies and showed the Daleks her crack.
Because the Daleks all contained residual time energy from over exposure to the void, the were absorded into the ginger bird's crack. However, the ginger herself, had been time-travelling, so also fell into own her crack. By the way this is where the phrase "So far up your own ****" came from.
With the red-head, and the Daleks, now having never existed, the Doctor and Davros remained in the tardis alone.
"NOO," screamed the doctor, in agony over the death of his beloved compainion. "Why couldn't I have seen her crack when she was younger"