Why Final Fantasy never made it as TV stars #3
Real Fantasy
By Yuffie Vaneltine
Find out when 8 video game characters are picked to live in a house. And stop being graphics, and start being real. The Real Fantasy.
(Pardon any wrong information; I don't know it that well)
Cast
Name: Yuffie
Age:16
Game: Final Fantasy VII
Likes: Stealing, materia, and Cloud
Hates: Law enforcement, Shinra, and perverts
Name: Cloud
Age:22
Game: Final Fantasy VII
Likes: His hair, hair gel, and his sword
Hates: Sephiroth, Shinra, and Jenova
Name: Selphie
Age: 18
Game: Final Fantasy VIII
Likes: Cowboys, Bad boys, and being happy
Hates: Being bored, mean people, and being sad
Name: Zell
Age:18
Game: Final Fantasy VIII
Likes: Kicking ass, checking out girls, and eating
Hates: Being called names, being weak, and housework
Name: Cammy
Age:20
Game: Street Fighter Series
Likes: Fighting, shopping, and beating the living crap out of Bison
Hates: Bison, Vega, and scars
Name: Sakura
Age: 16
Game: Street Fighter Series
Likes: Ryu, being a Street Fighter, and PE
Hates: Math, Rival Schools, and Evil
Name: Sephiroth
Age:33
Game: Final Fantasy VII
Likes: Being a god, killing people, and showing his sword off to the ladies
Hates: Heroes, Knights of the Round, and Holy materia
Name: Ryoga
Age: 16
Game: Ranma ½ hard battle (it's a SNES game, but it still kicks ass!)
Likes: Akane, fighting, and traveling
Hates: Pigs, Ranma, and cold water
First show. All eight walk into a room in their new apartment. After introducing themselves they start to call beds.
"I get the one with all the girls in it!" Zell yelled. He smiles. The women roll their eyes.
"Well, there are three rooms. I AM NOT BEING WITH THAT "MOMMY'S LITTLE ANGEL" OVER THERE!" Cloud says pointing to Sephiroth.
"Well at least my girlfriend didn't get killed." Sephiroth said.
"You were the one who killed her. Besides, she was just one of my many girlfriends." Cloud says.
"Okay, Cloud and Sephiroth not together." Cammy says. "I have an idea. Zell, Sephiroth, and Selphie in the room to the left. Me, Cloud, and Yuffie in the middle room. And Sakura and Ryoga in the right room."
"That sounds okay with me." Yuffie says. She starts to eye the rest of the cast for valuables that she can steal.
"I am happy, I have a Selphie as a roommate!" Zell puts his arm around Selphie.
Selphie turns to Sephiroth. "How much do I have to pay you to keep him off of me?"
"1,000 a day." Sephiroth says.
Selphie takes out her check book, "And is Sephiroth your whole name or last."
"No, No, No. No one is paying anyone. We work as a team." Cammy says.
"Who died and made you queen." Zell asked. Cammy turn to Zell.
"SONIC DRILL!" Cammy yelled and drilled into the air to Zell. He went flying into the wall.
"I WANT HER AS A ROOMMATE!" Selphie yelled.
"Me too!" Zell said, "She's playful."
Sakura looked at Ryoga with big eyes. She could tell he was a fighter. He had a headband just like Ryu. And he was even handsome and her age. "Ohh, I am happy with my roommate."
"Umm, yeah. Where is my room again?" Ryoga asked. He was going to need some help.
"Okay, So. Me, Cloud, and Yuffie in one room. Sakura, Ryoga, and Selphie in another. Zell and Sephiroth in the last one." Cammy says.
"Fine with me." Yuffie says, "Cloud has the best materia!"
"No he doesn't! I do! I have the black materia!" Sehpiroth whines.
"REALLY!?" Yuffie runs over to Sehpiroth and starts to kiss him. Meanwhile her hands are searching him for the black materia. 'It's got to be on him somewhere!' Yuffie thought to herself.
'Should I be liking this or fearing it?' Sephiroth said in his mind, 'the kissing is okay but where does she think those hands are going?'
"OH MY GOD STOP IT YUFFIE! THAT MAN TRIED TO KILL US ALL, HE KILLED AERIS!" Cloud yelled and ripped Yuffie off Sephiroth.
"Bloody hell, why did you stop them. Can't you see how fine that man is? She was having a good time!" Cammy yelled and slapped Cloud.
"Yeah Cloud, Sephiroth was going to score if it weren't for you!" Zell said.
"It's okay, I'll just go cry now!" Yuffie runs off. Cloud sees something black and sparkling hidden in her hand.
'I don't know what's worse, Sephiroth having it or Yuffie!' Cloud thought to himself. He looked over at Sephiroth, who was trying to look cool. But his face was red as blood in a blush.
"I'm going to go take a hot bath!" Ryoga says. He turns and walks into the closet.
"Riiiiiiight, well we'll just let him have fun in there." Zell says. "When do we eat?"
Selphie looks out the back window of the house. "HEY! We have a pool!"
"Pool?" Zell asked, "Does that mean you are going to be in your bathing suit?"
"Yes, Zell." Selphie said with a doubt to her voice. She looked at Zell with an evil eye; he was really staring to get on her last nerve.
"Hey Selphie, why don't you want to get with a guy like me; I know how to treat a woman to some good loving." Zell said with a wink.
"Cause I have Irvine." Selphie said.
"Yeah, but you are like not married to him. Why don't we just sleep around?" Zell asked.
"Actually, I am married to him. We got married last month in a small church without telling anyone." Selphie said.
"WHAT!? That sucks. Where did that Yuffie girl go, she seemed easy." Zell walked off.
"3..2..1" Selphie counted down. On one a scream was heard.
"YOU PERVERT!" Yuffie yelled and Zell went flying out of her room.
"Damn, she seem to be all up on the Sephiroth guy and now she trying to burn me off. Fine stay in there with what ever the hell those little orbs are. I am going to go find Cammy." Zell said.
"He isn't going to make it out of this season alive." Sakura said. She went off into the closet to find Ryoga.
"There you are you silly boy, how about you and me spar?" Sakura asked.
"Spar? Okay, finally some fun." Ryoga said. Him and Sakura went to the backyard to spar. The fight started out simple enough, both throwing warning punches to see the reflects of the other. Then Sakura decide to show off.
"RUNNING DRAGON PUNCH!" Sakura ran up into Ryoga and knocked him into the sky. Then ina air kick she knocked him into the pool. "Opps sorry, I got carried away."
She walked over to the pool to help Ryoga out, but there was no sign of him. "Ryoga?"
A small black piglet squirmed out of the other end. (For those not familiar with Ranma, Ryoga turns into a cute little pig when he is splashed with cold water.) He looked back and ran, he didn't want Sakura finding out his one secret. He ran in his normal fashion, having no clue where he was going.
"Oh look at the cute piggy wiggy!" Cammy said. Ryoga looked up. She was standing there in her bathrobe. Her hair was wet; she must have just taken a shower. She picked up Ryoga and walks into her room.
Yuffie looked up from her materia pricing guide and looked at what Cammy had in her arms as she moved into the room. "Ooooooo, it's so cute!"
"Isn't he? Can you hold him while I get my clothes on? I have to change fast before Zell finds me." Cammy handed the pig to Yuffie. Yuffie smiled at the piggy.
"Those my little pet want some candy?" Yuffie pushed a mint into his mouth. Ryoga's eyes turned to hearts. She looked just like Akane. She was as sweet as her too. His little heart melted. He oinked and nuzzled Yuffie's hand. "Hey Cammy, I think it likes me."
"Really?" Cammy came out in her pink fighting outfit with the bright red gloves and hat. She looked at the pig Yuffie now had snuggled to her chest. "Well, since he likes you so much, he can be your pet."
"Thanks." Yuffie said, "I'll call him Ninja."
"Weird name, but if you like it. I am going to get a tan." Cammy walked out of the room.
Cloud walks in. He sees Yuffie planting a peck on the pig's forehead. "Gee, you'll kiss anything won't you?" Cloud let out a laugh.
"You're just mad cause I got the black materia without a fight and you chased him around for two months." Yuffie said. "Cloud meet Ninja." Yuffie held up the pig.
"That's just great Yuffie, now put the damn pig down and give me the black materia." Cloud said.
"Why? It's safer with me. You might get mind controlled and give it back to Sephiroth." Yuffe said. She picked the black materia up off the bed and dropped it down the front of her shirt. "Hay, now you'll never get it."
"Want to bet?" Cloud tackled Yuffie and reached down the front of her shirt. She kicked and screamed.
"HELP! PERVERT! Hey watch it, that's isn't the materia so you can stop grabbing at it." Yuffie said.
Sephiroth walks in. He shakes his head. "Cloud, Cloud, Cloud, I know you have been desperate since Aeris died and Tifa left you to marry Barret, but trying to take advantage of a young girl, shame on you."
Ryoga in pig form runs up and bites Cloud's other hand.
"AHHH, the damn thing is biting me, get it off, get it off!" Cloud ran around the room with Ryoga on his hand.
"This is sad. The great hero running around like an idiot cause of a piglet." Sephiroth said. He turned to Yuffie, "Wanna go get some food?"
"Sure!" Yuffie got up and left Cloud running around the room like an idiot.
Fin
Not as good as the other ones but it was still pretty damn good if I may say so myself.
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