Author's Note: I'm going to keep this short so it doesn't end up being longer than this little fic itself. A got a random prompt today from MiLa63 for a Puckleberry take on the Christmas episode in season 2, specifically when Finn leaves Rachel in the middle of the tree lot. I've been wanting to write something for Christmas, and considering "Last Christmas" is one of my favorite songs (and I love the Glee version), inspiration clearly struck because this popped out real quick. And, more than that, I didn't realize this until investigating more, but this all happens during one of my favorite times in the series to play around with Puckleberry (the next episode is the one with the "Need You Now" duet). So, even though I've done it a few times before, I wouldn't be surprised if I came back to this particular universe to play around with the possibilities - even though it is marked as completed right now.
So, long story short, thank you MiLa63 for the prompt (and I hope it is at least sort of what you wanted, even though it's not too heavy on the romantic side ... maybe later, if I do continue)! Next, thank you in advance to anyone was reads and reviews the fic. I know I'm an unreliable source of Puckleberry entertainment these days, so I really do appreciate it.
Finally, the lyrics used at the beginning and end of the story are obviously not mine - nor are the Glee characters mine - but Wham!'s. No suing!
Last Christmas, I gave you my heart
But the very next day, you gave it away
As the distance between them grew to the point where Rachel couldn't even make out his tall stature anymore, the hope that had previously been keeping her warm completely vanished. She shivered in reaction, crossing her arms protectively across her chest - fighting off the cold and maybe also the onslaught of emotions building inside her. He was gone. Not just physically from the tree lot - though that was quite a problem in itself since her phone was in his truck and she couldn't possibly walk the few miles back home given the tree lot's somewhat off-the-beaten-path location - but, it felt, from her life, too. One day they were McKinley High's cutest (if not most unlikely) couple, and the next they were broken up. Officially. Again.
She understood what she'd done was wrong, and she was more than willing to work through things with him, but she never had imagined it would lead to this; after all, if she had been willing to forgive him for all the pain he'd caused her - and she felt it necessary to point out, even just to herself, that she wasn't limiting that pain to this last go-around or even specifically to what he'd done with Santana. Rachel had forgiven Finn time and time again as they navigated the murky waters of their romantic relationship because that was what people did when they were in love - then shouldn't he offer her the same courtesy?
More so than the particularly harsh breeze that almost knocked her hat off, her previous revelation nearly knocked her over: What if he was never in love with her?
"Yo? Earth to Berry!"
She turned quickly, taking in her surroundings for the first time since Finn walked away. "Oh, Noah." She breathed out, attempting to sound appear casual. "I'm sorry. I didn't see you there."
His features quickly morphed from the confusion/concern that greeted her to his patented smirk. "Well thanks to your bedazzled hat and Rudolph-the-Red-Nosed coat, I saw you from about 4 miles away."
He looked her over, and while his tone had been teasing, his gaze never was. She dropped her head to appraise her own outfit, though mostly she was just trying to distract herself from the approval that was almost always in his eyes when he was done giving her a once-over.
"Legit, Berry, s'not even that cold tonight."
Rachel shrugged emptily, again only thinking about how much warmer she'd felt earlier in the night. Now everything seemed cold. Her blood, the tear stain she felt on her cheek … life. She cleared her throat to prevent it from lodging, his unwavering form giving her something to focus on besides her increasingly depressing thoughts. He was dressed in a simple dark green sweater that looked to be layered over one of his climate-control athletic shirts, paired with dark-wash jeans and steel-toed boots. If the lack of his new bomber jacket wasn't enough reason to question his own attire, then the name tag adorned on his left pectoral certainly was. "Do you work here?"
"Yep," he answered with a pop, his grin widening a little as he looked around the Christmas tree lot. "There's nothing more fun as a Jew than scamming stupid Christians into getting a bigger tree to celebrate a birth that never happened."
She rolled her eyes and really tried not to smile, but couldn't help but concede, "I'm sure you are a wonderful salesman."
He nodded in agreement. "What are you doing here?"
The smile she'd been fighting disappeared altogether, her gaze shifting from Noah to where she'd last seen Finn. She could feel the coldness seep through her skin, beelining right for her heart until Noah's irritated grumble sidetracked her pity party. "What?"
"M'just gettin' a little sick of your boo-hoo face."
Her sadness was immediately replaced with anger. "Excuse me for being upset that the only romantic relationship that has ever meant anything to me is officially over. I'm so sorry for upsetting you." She huffed indignantly, keeping her head high to show her defiance. However, all she saw in reaction was an expression she couldn't quite place - though she assumed the far-away look equalled boredom on his part. Sighing, she begrudgingly answered his original question. "Finn and I came here to pick up a new tree for glee. But … he left."
"To get his truck?" He looked over toward the makeshift parking lot, searching for his friend's familiar blue pickup. "I can help load. Which one ya gettin'?"
Rachel shook her head quietly, avoiding his gaze only so he couldn't see her boo-hoo face make what felt like a permanent appearance. She didn't look up again until she heard his obscene mumbling, the phrase "that stupid fucker" echoing in her ears as she watched him walk toward the tent behind him. But just as she was wondering why it seemed like everyone walked away from her - him, Finn, Shelby - Noah reappeared, now in the aforementioned jacket and twirling a set of keys.
"Come on, let's go."
Her anxiousness trumped her surprise as she sputtered, "Oh, no. No, thank you, but ... that's not necessary."
"Nah?" He rose his arms out, gesturing to everything and nothing all at once. "Ya got some hiking boots hidden under that stupid hat?"
She glowered at the comment, not giving him the satisfaction of removing the garment despite the fact that he had a point; it was barely on her head anymore as is, and wasn't even covering her ears. "I meant there was no need for you to leave your place of employment on my account."
He scoffed. "Yeah, well, there was no need to be a giant toolbag and leave ya stranded 5 miles outside of town, either, but shit happens." He turned back away from her, walking presumably to his car. "Now let's go."
She obeyed for several reasons, the least of importance being that she was in desperate need of a way home. Instead, she was more focused on why Noah seemed to care so much, though she attempted to distract herself from those thoughts as she watched him fiddle with several different knobs in the car after starting the ignition. She was grateful when he stopped the heat dial at only level 2, as he was right about this evening's somewhat mild temperature - for December in Ohio, anyway; her hands were already sweating inside her gloves. She also couldn't help but notice there was no Christmas music playing on his radio, but rather just a classic rock song that somehow reminded her of Finn but was still so Noah.
"Thank you," she whispered once he finally got onto the main highway and he'd moved the heat down another (quieter) level.
"Consider it a gift for the sixth night of Hanukkah."
She smiled in spite herself, asking, "What about my other five?"
"Ain't me stayin' away from ya these past few days gift enough?"
She frowned at the question, not sure she'd consider his absence ever to be a good thing. Despite his involvement in her turbulent love life, he'd been nothing but nice to her lately. In fact, even though his words didn't always convey such, he was the only one left at McKinley who hadn't cast her aside; he'd removed the Glist from her locker, he'd stuck up for her at Sectionals, and he'd even drove her home afterward then, too - though that was what led to their minor indiscretion, but she couldn't even fault him for that given his admirable refusal of her proposition (even if that still stung a little).
"M'surprised ya even remembered it was Hanuakkah." He side-eyed her before putting his attention back on the road. "Ya know, considering you look like a fuckin' Christmas factory exploded."
She gave him a pass on the harsh words considering he was doing her a favor. Plus, part of her did feel bad about how focused on Christmas she'd been so far this year. For goodness sake, she'd admitted to Finn that she'd asked Santa for him last year, after singing what she'd claimed was her favorite Christmas song. She was such a schmuck.
"I'll try to make up for it at your mother's party on Thursday."
He groaned as if he'd forgotten about the annual event, which seemed very unlikely considering it consisted of the same small group of Jewish friends and family visiting his house every year since before she could remember, all celebrating the last night of Hanukkah. And, every year, his mother spent half the time reminiscing about all the good things from the year prior and all her big plans to devote more energy to their faith and the other half barking orders at Noah about everything from the food to the decorations to the guests. Still, considering her fathers' lack of familial support (and therefore visits) and the alienation of their faith societally speaking, the Puckerman Hanukkah party was something she'd never forget to attend, and something she'd miss most when she finally left Lima for New York.
"I'm making my famous sweet noodle kugel with dried cherries," she sing-songed, giggling a little when his exasperation immediately turned to excitement. "Non-vegan."
He pumped his fist once before returning it to the wheel, as if he'd been waiting for her to confirm that she wasn't going to "ruin" the traditional meal like he claimed she did on several other dishes with her vegan substitutes. "You spoil me, Berry."
She blushed at his words, even though she knew they were spoken offhandedly. Almost everything he said was, which was why she found herself analyzing those few phrases of sincerity so closely. He wasn't one to show his feelings easily, and certainly not to everyone, so she couldn't help but again think about his attention and care these past few weeks and to question his motives.
"Noah, why are you being so nice to me?"
He looked over at her with a furrowed brow. "Outside of the ride, I don't think I've said a nice word to ya all night."
It was mostly true, so she tried a different angle. "I know how important your friendship with Finn is, so I would understand if you needed to distance yourself from me in order to mend what we … what I broke."
He pulled into her driveway and cut the engine, taking nearly a full minute before he responded. "Finn will always be my boy, but he was a total dickhead for leavin' ya at the lot tonight." He stayed quiet again, and she followed suit if only because it seemed the best way to pry information out of him. "'Sides, he's got enough friends. You on the other hand …"
It again wasn't the nicest thing to say, but somehow coming from Noah it seemed sweet, not to mention completely unexpected. "No one ever chooses me."
He chuckled at her words, despite the sincerity in which she said them. "Guess that makes me special, Berry."
"You are," she replied without hesitation, bravely locking eyes with him and hoping he wouldn't ridicule her honesty for being too heartfelt. Yet, in the quietness of his car, with the emotions of the night still swirling inside her, she would have welcomed the mockery in place of the space that she realized was nonexistent between them. Their faces were only a foot or so apart, their hands just centimeters from overlapping on the console between them. It was so much like how things had started between them after Sectionals that this time she knew better than to lean into him - if only because it wouldn't be fair to him, this time.
"Goodnight, Noah."
He cleared his throat while shaking his head just a little, as if he had to physically clear away the fog that she, too, felt clouding her thoughts. "Night, Berry."
She stepped out of his car and walked a couple of steps away before turning and lifting a gloved hand to wave bye as he pulled out and back toward the tree lot. And despite being back in the cold, Rachel once again felt that warmth from earlier spread through her. Only this time, the hope flooding through her was that maybe next year she'll think of last Christmas and finally have had gotten it right.
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special