Disclaimer: Much more graphic honeymoon scenes would be in order if we owned it... ;)
Once the Volturi and their mob of now disloyal witnesses had left, the vampires and shapeshifters alike could breath easy. As could the hybrids.
However, the following Day, Charlie's cruiser pulled into the Cullen's drive. As he exited the car, he bore an unusually sombre expression. Bella's brow furrowed and she glanced at Edward who was unsuccessfully trying to supress a large grin. Alice shook her head at him, but he ignored her.
After three raps on the door, Charlie let himself in. He frowned at Edward's look of pure joy and turned to Bella.
"Bells," he began mournfully," I've got some bad news."
Edward snorted, clearly shaking with laughter. Charlie shot him a glare and turned back to his daugher.
"What is it Char- dad?" she asked worriedly.
"Mike Newton died last night." he said almost inaudibly, but Bella's razor-sharp senses heard him clearly. She sat still for a moment, and then asked quietly, "How did it happen?"
"It was a freak accident involving a condom and a stilletto heel...let's just leave it at that." Bella, always thinking of others before herself, asked," How's Jessica?"
"Well, she threw away the heels." Charlie replied thoughtfully. Alice giggled and Jasper snickered under his breath. Edward was now biting his fist, his shoulder's shaking violently. The entire room was by now hiding their own amusement, even Carlisle, although he was shaking his head at them. Charlie seemed oblivious to everyone's amusement except Edward's, and continued to throw him dirty looks.
A few minutes later, Charlie left, stating he had to get back to the station. As soon as the door closed, Edward jumped up, dragging Bella with him, and began waltzing around the room. He bore a look of pure triumph and merely laughed at the scowl Bella sent at him. His joy infectious, she grinned ruefully back at him.
A/N: You know you wanted it to happen. Admit it.