Stand Up

Colonel Roy Mustang…an all around good guy. Being a State Alchemist is difficult and most people are so stressed out they tend to take it out on others, but not Roy. He tries to make the better of things. He tries to look in a more positive way. Don't get me wrong, he does get angry from time to time, but that's why he has friends. Friends that he can talk to and have a little fun with. Friends that he calls subordinates, but he would do anything for them. That's Roy for you, but ever since it happened, he hasn't been the same. It's like he's not even Roy Mustang.

"I'll work under you, close to the higher ups and push you to the top."

"…an all around good guy. Very dedicated to his work and even more dedicated to his friends. Gone, but never forgotten. May his soul rest in peace." Roy groaned as he shifted in his seat.

"Mom, how come? Why are they burying daddy? Who are those people? Why are they burying him? Why!"

"He's gone baby." Again he moved around.

"They can't! I don't like it! Daddy said that he had a lot of work to do and if they bury him he can't do it when he wakes up! Stop them mommy! Daddy needs to do his work! He told me! Why are you burying daddy, mommy? Why! Daddy wake up!" Roy suddenly jerked up with a gasp, startling himself back to reality.

"Sir, sleeping on the job again will get you no where." Roy looked over and saw his subordinate, Jean Havoc standing there. Roy sighed and held his head up with his hand over his eyes. "Colonel?" Roy looked up to see a look of concern on Havoc's face. "Is something wrong?"

"Lieutenant, it's nothing," Roy said with a sigh as he intertwined his fingers, staring down at his hands. The Lieutenant approached his desk.

"You know, if something's bothering you, you can say something."

"I have nothing to say."

"Yeah, and I'm going to stop smoking," Havoc said sarcastically.

"How about you just drop this and get back to work yourself?" Roy replied calmly and Havoc sighed. Roy never did show his emotions on his sleeve, but more in his actions. He's not the type to actually come out and say that something is bothering him. If he did it was very rare, but maybe that was because he knew he'd always be there. Always there to support him when the time came.

"Roy…" Why does it always have to be like this? Havoc thought while he watched Roy.

The next day was no different then the past month. One way or another, Colonel Roy Mustang would always seem to be in his own world, secluded from everyone. He shuts everyone out completely because it happened. "I always thought that death wouldn't take this big of a toll on him," Havoc thought as he watching Roy stare out the window. "It seems as though he wants to leave. Just get away from everyone…but he won't. Even if that window was wide open, I know he would leave. Or maybe that's just what I believe. Maybe I just don't want him to leave."

"What are you thinking, Lieutenant?" Roy's question caught Havoc off guard.

"Come again, sir?" Havoc stuttered.

"It was just a question. Can't you answer it?" Roy's words made Havoc flush and Roy wasn't even facing him. It was like he knew that Havoc was thinking about him. "You don't have to answer it, if you don't want to," Roy said as he stood up and turned to face him, which only made Havoc redder.

"I-I was just curious, is all," Havoc said a little too quickly.

"Curious of what?" Roy said with a slight grin as he stepped closer to Havoc.

"Sir, I…just was thinking…to myself and nothing more!" Havoc said, trying to find his next words to say and Roy noticed this.

"Do I make you nervous, Lieutenant?" Roy said as he stopped at Havoc's desk, leaning on it. Roy's face inches from his own.

"No, I…" But Havoc's words were cut short when he felt Roy's lips press against his own. The two parted as Roy stood back up straight. Havoc sat there, eyes opening slowly while he took in a slow, shaky breath. "Sir…?"

"Havoc," Roy said turning around and walking back towards the window, continuing to stare out of it. "You're not supposed to have anything to do with me, or my selfishness." Havoc stood up now; upset that Roy was talking this way again and again, day after day.

"Why have you been acting this way? Secluding yourself away from everybody! Ever since the funeral that day! Why?" Havoc showed a look of concern in his eyes, but he raised his voice as he stared at Roy, although he didn't look back at him.

"Stop…" Roy said in a weak, quiet voice.

"Have you really been living your life this way? Taking in everything and holding it all in?" Havoc's words continued to pierce into Roy.

Roy always needed, although he never once asked. But that's because he knew that he has people to lean on. He knew that he could count on them to give him what he wanted. You could always feel the way he relied on you, but that's changed now. Now he's at the end of his limit, feeling like he has no one to lean on.

"It's okay to let go! You don't have to do everything by yourself! You can rely on people when you're in pain! You don't have to live a life full of guilt and excuses!" Havoc stopped, afraid that Roy would be angry with him now. Roy's gaze dropped to the floor.

"You know," Roy said finally breaking the awkward silence. "There's nothing more scarier or depressing than the fact that your feelings aren't fake."

"Roy…" And with that, Havoc heard Roy crying softly and he dropped to his knees. Havoc kneeled down beside Roy and wrapped his arms gently around Roy's shoulders. Havoc closed his eyes and bit his lip, not sure what to say now. "Sir?"

"What a ridiculous person I must be," Roy whispered as he stopped crying. "I continue to go through my days thinking of what I could have done to prevent his death. Blaming myself with each breath I take."

"None of that was your fault," Havoc said trying to convince Roy, but after a death so huge what can you really say to make everything all right?

"But is was my fault! I never even stopped and thought for a second that something bad could have ever happened! I never once stopped to think that he'd be in danger."

"That's the price when you're in the military, sir."

"Ha! A dog of the military…" Roy said in disgust. "And after all these years you'd think I'd understand death by now, but I'm still sitting here in the past."

"Maybe that's the problem."

"What do you mean by that?" Havoc dropped his arms down by his side and faced Roy.

"What do you think Brigadier General Hughes would want you to do? The reason he kept things from you is to keep you safe. When something drastic happens, you tend to rush right into things. I think that'd he want you to move forward and continue with your own goal." Havoc put his hand on Roy's chest over his heart. "He's still right here, pushing you to the top just like he promise." Roy covered Havoc's hand and closed his eyes.

"Thank you, Havoc," Roy said opening his eyes and dropping his head with Havoc's.

"No problem, sir. I just want you to know that I'm here for you. If anything is bothering you, please…don't hesitate to tell me." Roy smiled with a sincere look in his eyes.

"It's been too long since he's smiled like that. Maybe he's finally beginning to open up and understand again."

"Well, we should get back to work, Lieutenant. We head out tomorrow." Havoc stood up and held his hand out to Roy.

"Yes, sir," Havoc said as he helped Roy stand back up on his feet.

The next day, soldiers and alchemists were gathered outside of eastern headquarters, preparing for the next war. "Now soldiers," Roy said to his small group of subordinates. "If anyone of you gets killed out there, I'll personally drag you drag back from hell and kill you again!" Roy smiled and a few of them smiled along. "But seriously, I don't want to see you guys getting killed out there. Remember if you live, everyone behind you lives. If you die, they die. You got that?" Roy's group saluted him.

"Yes, sir," they said loudly.

"Yes, sir…" Havoc repeated quietly, supporting him. He would support Roy until the day he died, just like Maes Hughes. Just like anyone who ever served him.