Title: Reborn
Author: mcanj25
Rating: T
Characters: Jack and Kate all the way; minor mention of other castaways
Summary: Post-rescue, Jack has to learn to join the world he had been lost to while he struggles with the decision to find Kate or forget her.
Author's Note: This story takes place after rescue. There was capture by the Others, but none of the specific events in the third season min-arc are applicable.
He turned the key slowly, testing the feel of it in the lock. After living for weeks out of a hotel in the Palisades, it was time for him to find a new, permanent, place, and—at his mother's urging—he'd found one quickly, settling for the first suitable space the realtor had shown him. It was odd, beginning life again, coming back from the dead. His mother had saved a few things from his old condo, but most of his belongings had been dolled out, donated, or sold. It was practical, he understood. His mother wasn't one to waste the money on storage for a son she believed was dead.
The new space was clean, or empty, he wasn't sure. Compact, but in a cozy way. Stationed in a fashionable district of Los Angeles, only a few blocks from the beach, the apartment boasted one master bedroom, a smaller study, the required living room and kitchen, a single bathroom suite. Bathed in warm colors and sturdy hardwood floors, the place—as his realtor had swooned—was a rare find. Ironically, he hadn't been looking too hard when it had fallen into his apathetic lap. The only problem was filling the space, seemingly cavernous with the absence of furniture. He found that he was in no hurry to settle in. He longed for the steady monotony of work to win out over the mediocre adventure that decorating offered. He made his way into the kitchen, opened the refrigerator, somehow expecting to find a cold beer waiting. The space was empty.
He sighed, leaned back against the island counter and thought about the mild and monotonous tasks ahead of him. Being reborn, he was discovering, was not an easy task. But it all seemed pointless, all the chores and paperwork, the shopping and acclimating—they were small and insignificant in the face of what he'd just escaped. Life on the island had been a strange gift, he realized now. If not for the perspective it offered, than for the second chance it had given him. The chance to start again, to unload the burden he had been lugging with him everywhere before the crash. And then there was her. If he was given any gift by the island it was her. Infinitely her. He couldn't think about the island without the sweeping knowledge of her existence. What she meant to him then, and now even more so. Where was she?
It had been just over a year on the island before the hope of rescue had renewed itself in the form of a military craft bobbing on the horizon one warm evening in December. It had felt odd. Relief mingling so closely with anguish. The push of glee paradoxical to the pull of remorse. It ended too soon, perhaps.
He felt the kick of sand at his calves as she slowed to a stop behind him. His eyes focused on the faint twinkling of lights in the distance, unable to form the words to speak to her now. Now that she no longer belonged to the island, which meant she somehow no longer belonged to him. With the onslaught of civilization so near, the indomitable spirit that had characterized her was slowly slipping back towards the darting, tentative Kate that belonged to the real world. There, back on the mainland, back in the cities and grime, she was an animal on the run. Too wild to be caged by love, or him, if the two were even separable.
They'd only admitted their feelings something like three weeks ago, though the feelings had been there for far longer, they both knew. Sure, they had never acknowledged anything official during their brief time together, had made no promises, never consummated the fledging of a relationship they had somehow forged a year too late. But before he could ruminate any longer over the bittersweet pool of emotions he found himself wading through, her soft voice broke his thin veil of solitude.
"It was bound to happen, I guess, but damn. Pretty awful timing, huh?" she mused.
He could tell she was trying. Trying to make this a little less painful. He let her voice wash over him a moment before turning and meeting her eyes, shining with the moonlight or with unshed tears, he wasn't sure. He studied her for a moment before letting out a short, defeated laugh.
"Yeah, damn awful timing." He took a step towards her and saw her tense. Wishing only to feel her warmth, commiserate with her, he purposefully moved towards her, arms stretching ever so slightly towards her. She blanched and took a step backwards, putting her hands up defensively.
"Maybe we shouldn't." she whispered. He stopped abruptly, his brow creasing immediately with hurt. Seeing this, her eyes softened.
"It's just that it'll only make it harder," she ventured, "You know, when I have to…"
Angry now, he turned on her. "Have to what, Kate?" He bit out. "What are you going to do? You going to run?" She bowed her head at his outburst, the curls of her messy pony tail spilling over her shoulder. He had to stifle his heavy breathing to hear her muffled words.
"You know what I have to do, Jack. I can't just…I can't just let them take me. Not after being here, free for so long. I can't go to jail, not after everything that's happened here."
Boldly, he stepped forward and took her by the shoulders.
"We can do this, Kate. We can get you a great lawyer and fix this. We can get passed this and you can live a normal life. It doesn't have to be this way—you running. I don't want that for you, for us." He studied her eyes, hard brown meeting weary green.
She smiled ruefully, smoothed her hand over the stubble of his cheek as he let out a puff of air. Ducking and bending his forehead against her own, he spoke softly, resigned, and reduced.
"Don't run, Kate. Please. Please stay with me. Be with me. Don't run."
So that's chapter one. I'm not sure how frequently I'll be posting updates, hopefully once a week at least. Please review, I'd love your feedback, and I'm sure it'd spur me onwards towards updates!
Chapter Two: Jack's first week back in the real world, how he and Kate got together, and a surprise!