Hiccup The Useless

Hiccup. The most useless name any Viking could think of. Hiccup. The most hated runt through the village of Berk. Hiccup. Hiccup. Hiccup. The one the only The Useless. Hiccups life has always been a real hell. He was the runt, the weak one, the one no one liked, but the thing is that no one ever took the time to realize that inside that soon to be 15 year old boy there's a depressed, sad and suicidal soul in him.

He thought no one loved him, he hated himself. All he received was neglect, physical and emotional abuse. Everything started when he was just 3 months of age, the day Valka Died, his mom, then moved on to neglect that started when he was 4, always getting the disappointment look from his father, Stoick The Vast, respected chief of the tribe. Then the emotional and physical abuse started when he was 7 by the twins Ruffnut and Tuffnut and of course his, not that smart cousin, Snotloud

By the time he was 9 he started doing self harm, in other words, he started cutting. Then when he was 11 he started getting addicted to the cutting. When he was 13 he started developing his first suicidal thoughts.

Now he is 14, his 15th birthday is just one month away. But he wasn't looking forward to it.

Instead he just decided that he didn't care about his age or about himself for that matter.

He as always had a little crush on Astrid Hofferson. But sadly she felt like the exact opposite. She never cared about hiccup, she always disposed the weak boy.

Even thought he was a runt. He never gave up on trying to impress the village mostly his father.

-Hiccup-

Hiccup woke up. He opened his eyes slightly only to find his favorite cutting dagger on his desk, he forgot it there from the cutting he was doing late at night the night before. He sighed sadly and put it away. By the time was ready to start the day he walk down the stairs and saw his father on one side of the table.

"Good morning" he said to his father. He received no awnser back. He sighed sadly once again and told his father he was going to the forge, where apparently he had a job with his mentor Gobber.

His father just simply nodded as the boy walked through the the door.

Disappointment look in his eyes.

As he walked throughout the village he noticed some Viking pointing at him whispering and then some laughing and others looking at him with disgrace and the "I wish you were dead and in hell" face coming from Snotloud, the twins and Astrid, while Fishlegs just stood there awkwardly. He was used to thins so he continued running toward the forge, but before he could reach it he was pushed to a mud puddle. And realized that it was his cousin Snotloud.

He sadly sight and tried to stand up, but before he could Tuffnut pushed him back to the ground and said "Where do you think your going buddy" he said

" To my job."he responded

"Well yeah I know that but you forgot that we still have to give you your morning beating" Hiccups eyes widen as he said "Just let me go" not raising his voice. As he tried to get back up Tuffnut said "Shut up useless and hold still" But before he could respond Tuffnut pushed hiccup to the ground and started kicking him in his side, hardly, Ruffnut and Snotloud joined in the beating after about 3 kicks. About 10 minutes passed filled with kickin and punching, after that hiccup had a minor wound in his side and a bloody nose. They laughed and walked away admiring what they just did.

They left him there in a pool of his own blood and barely strong enough to to get up

.But hiccup sadly didn't even care about the abuse because he believes he deserves that kind of punishment for being weak. He sighed and said still hurt " Yep just another normal day in berk"

Hiccup ran late because or the beating, he knew his mentor, Gobber, didn't like that. Gobber has been the only real father figure to the lad ever since he realized he was an outcast.

Hiccup walked in with a sour face, puts on the apron, and heads to work. Gobber didn't say anything about him being late. He just stared at the young boys injury from the beating.

-Hours later-

It was getting dark, he about to go home, planing on his next cut.

He sigh sadly, His cuts, he had them all over his body his legs, wrist, stomach, back shoulders and arms. He never rolled his sleeves up and he never took his shirt off not even at the forge considering the fact that is extremely hot in there during the day.

He slowly began to love the scars over time and admiring them, it's how he keeps control of the pain he feels inside, for each one there is a different story, a different meaning.

He was about to go home when he heard screaming and war cries from different people and that can only mean one thing. Dragon Raid.

He went out side but all he heard toward him were

"Get back inside"

"what are you doing out again useless"

"Get inside hiccup"

Just the little comments he recived from his people.

He was use to the hurtful comments. He never had much of a reaction.

He headed to the forge.

"Nice of you to join the party, I thought you would've been carried of"

"Who me? No I'm way to muscular for there sake" He said struggling to lift a hammer

"They wouldn't know what to do with all this" he said showing off his totally unimpressive noodle arms in a flexing pose.

"Well they need toothpicks don't they" his mentor said sarcastically

"And there it is" He thought to himself "Something is telling me that this world is not my place" That's when it happened, the idea of him doing it "SUICIDE" He thought to himself.

"Nobody will miss me I am the runt of this village and an embarrassment to the tribe, they would throw the biggest celebration of the year, I will not be missed"

"I want to die" he keep repeating in his head "I want to die, I want to die, I want to die,

"I need to die, I need to die, I NEED TO DIE"

"I will die" he said under his breath so no one can hear him.

After the idea popped in to his head he heard the familiar signature cry of the most powerful and lethal dragon in the known Viking world.

"Night fury" The unholy offspring of lightning and death itself

He heard someone outside scream it's name as it shot down the remaining look out tower.

Gobber told Hiccup to stay inside the forge.

But as always he ignored his mentors order and went after the night fury with his bola launcher he invented

He went to the back of the village and heard the deadly dragons signature cry.

He shot the bola cannon and the Nigh fury went down as it screamed.

Hiccup then forgot his depression and was happy for that one moment, He is not use to feeling extreme joy like this, until behind his appeared the Monstrous Nightmare. He maid a sarcastic remark.As always.

And started running for his life

His father who was nearby, taking down some Nadders, herd the screams of the young boy.

He sigh in annoyance and told his men to take care of it.

Hiccup was hiding behind a pole and just when the nightmare was about to finish him.

His father punched it and keep doing it until it flight away.

-Hiccups POV-

The pole fell down and there I was staring at my father and realizing all the damage done to the village.

"Sorry Dad" was all I could say to him, I decided not to tell him anything else so he could calm down.

My dad dragged me from the collar to our house.

On the way I heard the five nightmares saying stuff about me (The 5 nightmares are Snotlout, Ruff, Tuff, Astrid and Fishlegs.)

"That's was quite the performance" said Tuff

"Yeah I've never seen anybody mess up that bad, That's helped" said Snotlout

"Thank you, Thank you, I was trying so..." I said sarcastically and embarrassed

As me and Gobber were walking to my house I try to tell him that I hit the night fury.

But all he said was "sure Hiccup"

"He never listens to me"

"Runs in the family"

"And when he does listen it's like with this disappointed scowl like someone just trimmed the meat in his sand which"

I stopped in the front of my house and try's to Imamate the voice of my father.

"Excuse me barmaid, I believe you have brought me the wrong offspring, I ordered and extra large boy with beefy arms, extra guts and glory on the side, this here, This is a talking Fishbone" I said sadly

"No, no your getting it all wrong, it's not what on the outside that matters, it's what's on the inside he cants stand" He said trying to make me feel better.

"Yep suicide is the best option, I'd I were dead my father would have nothing to clean up and Gobber would be free of me, it is decided by sundown today my dead body will be In a boat on fire, and no one will miss me"

"Thank you for summing that up" I said sarcastically

I looked at Gobber with sad eyes and said " Thank you Gobber for being like a father to me, my dad basically gave me to you, you won't have to worry about me anymore"

Gobber looked at me with a puzzled look, but before he could awnser I closed the door behind him.

I ran upstairs to my room and locked the door. I ripped a page of my journal, planted it in my desk and reach for the charcoal pencil I had in between my tunic and my vest.

I began to write, everything I felt, everything that happened to me, just so my father could know what was inside his son.

"Dear Dad

I know you think I'm a pathetic runt and an embarrassment as a son, but do not worry, you will not need to deal with me anymore.

I have decided to take my own life for the sake of the village. I am a horrible pathetic and weak excuse for a son, I have no friends, I am universally despised by everyone.

Im tired of the beatings, the disappointments, and the constant humiliations.

And I just know that the village will not miss me. I will be hanging my self in the forest just by Raven point, there you will see my lifeless body hanging from a tree.

I love you dad, I will alway love you. I love every single person in the village.

Tell Gobber that he was the only person who ever cared for me and tell him that I will dearly miss him.

I will be looking down from the depths of Valhalla. I will like you to read this poem I wrote 2 years ago,that was when I tried to commit suicide for the first time. But didn't have the guts to do it.

Well now I will do it I will finally be free, no more pain, no more misery and no more depression.

Just an average boy

He always wore a smile

He was cheerful and happy for a short while

Now he's older, things are getting colder

Life's not what he thought, he wished someone had told him

He told you he was down, you let it slip by

So from then on he kept it on the inside

he told himself she was alright

But he was telling white lies

Can't you tell? Look at his dull eyes

Tried to stop himself from crying almost every night

But he knew there was no chance of feeling alright

Summer came by, all he wore was long sleeves

'Cause those cuts on his wrists were bleeding through you see

he knew he was depressed, didn't want to admit it

Didn't think he fit it, everyone seemed to miss it

he carried on like a soldier with a battle wound

Bleeding out from every cut his body consumed

he had no friends outside, all alone he sat

And if someone were to notice he would blame the cat

But those cuts on his wrist, they were no mistake

But no one cared enough to save him from this self hate

Things were going down, never really up

And here he is now stuck in this stupid rut

he knew exactly what he had to do next

Just stand on that chair and tie the rope around his neck

he wrote a letter with his hand shaking wild

"Look at me now, are you proud of your precious child?"

But he knew that his parents weren't the ones to blame

It was the world that should bow down its head in shame

he stood up on the chair and looked out at the moon

Just don't think, it'll all be over soon

The chair fell down as he took his final breath

It's all over, all gone, now he's greeting death

His Dad walks in, he falls down to the floor

And now nothing can take back what he just saw

The little boy that he raised is just hanging there

His body's pale and his face is violently bare

he sees the note and unfolds it with care

All he does is stare, "How can this be fair?"

he starts reading as the tears roll down his face

"I'm sorry Dad but this world is just not my place

I've tried for so long to fix this and fit in

I've come to realize this world's full of sin

There's nothing for me here, I'm just a waste of space

I've got no reason to stay here with this awful race

It's a disgrace, I was misplaced

Born in the wrong time, and in the wrong place

It's OK though, 'cause you'll see me soon

You'll know when your time has come, just look at the moon

As it shines bright, throughout the night

And remember everyone's facing their own fight

But I can't deal with the pain, I'm not a fighter

You'll make it through the night, just hug your pillow tighter

So let the world know, that I died in vain

Because the world around me, is the one to blame

And I know in a year, you'll forget I'm gone

'Cause I'm not really something to be dwelled on

That's what they used to tell me, all those kids outside

I was never worth one single fight

My presence on this earth is not needed any longer

And if anything, I hope this makes you stronger

You're the best friend, that I ever had

Such a shame I had to make you so very sad

But just remember that you meant everything to me

And to my heart, you're the only one that held the key

Now it's time to go, I'm running out of space to write

And yes I lost my fight, but please just hold on tight

I'm watching over you, from the clouds above

And sending down the purest and whitest dove

To watch over you, and be my helpful eye

So this is it, world, goodbye."

I hope you like it, it was this that keep me in my place until now, please, let the village know that my death was there fault. And now that the road has ended for me,

Take Snotlout as your heir he's much stronger than me and I know for sure that you like him much more than me.

But be careful he's about as smart as a box of hair. This is it world.Goodbye"

Hiccup"

I folded the note with care and began to think to myself 'It's for the best'

I'm gonna do it, goodbye world.