Falling into despair was an easy task for a girl like her. Everything Lucia had done since her sister's death was to become to sister she lost, the one her parents were proud of rather than the one everyone said should have died in her place. Wishing was additionally easy since she was so often bullied and, like all humans, she believed that there was nothing wrong with wishing. A wish was just a dream that you could hope on with no return. There wasn't an entity known to man that could grant the heart's deepest and darkest wishes.

But that was the issue. Had Lucia known about the dark beings that could grant your wishes in the twisted ways they so often implied were what the unknowing heart had wished for, she never would have made her wish. Not armed with that knowledge, however, she foolishly wished for those who had hurt her to experience the same pain she had. Perhaps she hadn't wanted them to die or perhaps she did. It wasn't a topic she was open to debating with herself, or anyone else for that matter. Some things a person should never know if they want to stay sane, she reasoned with herself, and that was fine. This was one of those very things. It was bad enough that she had summoned a doppelganger. She didn't need the added insanity boost of knowing whether or not she had really wanted them to die the way they did. If she did find out there was no guarantee that anybody could pull her out of the brink of darkness.

Zhuyuan had been right when he called doppelgangers evil. Even born out of a wish for another person, they were twisted. There had never been a doppelganger that wasn't in some way either murderous or disturbed. They were all like a form of the one who summoned them that gave in to the dark desires so many avoided for fear of becoming a social outcast. Nothing good could come from their existence. As it was, Lucia's doppelganger was causing panic and ruin in her life. People thought that she had mutilated and tortured Anastasia to the point that she committed suicide not long after the group hospital visit. Helen had disappeared after she had been attacked and Lucia was chased away from her while she was trying to save her. Samantha and Karen were the only two still safe. She had to get rid of this doppelganger to keep it that way. She didn't want the trouble it gave her.

"My offer to help you still stands, Lucia," Zhuyuan said, still looking down at his papers. Lucia jumped a little, looking at him with surprise on her face. She had been lost in thought, she realized, and he must have guessed what she was thinking of. Her cheeks flushed a soft pink. They were supposed to be working on the essay, not discussing her problems.

"Thanks, Lee. I… I've decided to take you up on the offer. But… Rather than marrying you so soon shouldn't we date first?" She was cautious about the question. She'd seen his scarier side and she didn't want to unleash it.

He thought for a moment before nodding. She was glad he'd agreed. Lucia hadn't ever really thought of him as anything but a good friend. She had to learn to love him before she could try to act like a wife to him. With any luck, she would fall in love with him on the way and pretending wouldn't be needed. People really do unspeakable things to stay alive, she thought. I'm going to lie to Lee and marry him to get rid of my doppelganger. She considered this for a moment. She wasn't going to forgive herself for this but she could think of no other way out of the nightmare she was in.

Zhuyuan reached over and brushed his hand over hers. "Are you okay, Lucia? You seem a little spacey."

"I'm fine. Just a little tired I guess." Lucia smiled at him, a fake smile but still a smile. She tried not to notice that there was no warmth from him anymore. Everything would be right once the doppelganger was gone. That was something she would make sure of herself.

…

Lucia stared at the puddle on the walkway. It used to be her doppelganger, but when she defeated her own weakness it melted into this, a puddle of red goo. Zhuyuan looked proud of her, like he hadn't expected it to go as well as it had. She wanted to wipe the look off of his face. She knew now what he had done to her friends, those he'd been related to and those she had admired. He killed them, she repeated in her head for the umpteenth time today. He killed our senior, he killed Clifford, he made Chunxiang mentally ill, and he hurt Shuang. I can't forgive him.

She smiled at him as he reached for her hand. He was still cold to her and she knew he would always be. A boy who couldn't love and showed no remorse for everything wrong he'd ever done could never be warm. He would only be cold.

Not much longer, she assured herself. This is over. Everything will be alright now. Lucia let him guide her away, much like she'd let him lead during the marriage ceremony. She barely knew where they were going and didn't care to know. If she didn't know it would be easier to forget. Forgetting everything seemed like a better idea than remembering this day forever.

"Ah, hold on," she called, trying to get him to stop for a moment. Lucia moved forward and put her arms around him as he did. It was like holding onto a glacier instead of a person. He was relaxed in the hug, making her job easier. With the sleeve of her sweater covering her fingers and palm, she drew the knife she kept from the fight with her doppelganger.

"Lucia?" She softly shushed him, nuzzling into his neck.

"Shuang told me what you've done, Lee." His body went ridged. She wondered if it was from the knife pressed against his back or from the fact that she knew. "I think… You need to face your punishment now."