1 | fullmetal alchemist © hiromu arakawa
2 | lack of proper capitalization and proper punctuation is intentional.
it's been a year to the day, and
i'm sorry.
i said i'd come see you as soon as this was all over, and i'd tell you everything, from the war to the aftermath, but i'd mostly tell you the good things, like how the world is quieter than either of us could have ever imagined, how i'm seeing things in a better light,
how gracia misses you but she's stronger than ever, how elicia is taller and prettier and smarter than everyone else her age and how she really does look like her mother with traces of you in her expressions.
- it would have been an infinite day by your grave. -
instead,
it's an endless night. there are no stars; everything is only illuminated for the longest and most blinding of instances by the way lightning kisses the ground in the distance, and like most things night and endless, it rains.
it doesn't whimper
or sigh
or whisper
or ask
or beg
or tell
or mumble
,
it SCOLDS
it SCREAMS
it YELLS
it CONVICTS
it CONDEMNS
it CRITICIZES
it ACCUSES
it BLAMES
and it fucking BURNS me to hear every single drop of rain say you could have been here with me on our way to some bar where you'll talk about the good things, like how the world is quieter than either of us could have ever imagined, how you're seeing things in a better light,
how gracia loves you, how elicia is taller and prettier and smarter than everyone else her age and how she really does look like her mother with traces of you in her expressions.
- it would have been an infinite year by your side. -
it's been a year to the day, and
i almost made it there. but the road dissolved in the rain the way that i tremble in what could have been, and i can't. i just can't.
i'm sorry.