TER ALL MEH BELOVED READERZZZZZ!

I'm sorry I haven't been doing so well. I act on spur of the moment ideas, so I haven't been thinking straight. But the academic system has freed me from all responsibility and now I am here to make up for past crappy (Read: all) fanfics and to try again!

I'll be balancing this baby with Of Blindness, Bandages, And Alchemy, but I take all support form your feedback, so if you say I must present myself to Grell in a baby blue outfit armed with a handkerchief tied around my neck and a sign that says 'I love Sebastian', I'll gladly accept it.

Before anything else, this is only a test run. Tell me if you guys wanna turn it into a series.

So Close

Today.

Is.

So.

Damn.

Horrible.

The Guardians almost blew my fucking cover.

Before that, I laid two eggs while I went to dreamland. EGGS, dammit!

And before that, Kuma – my older by a month brother – rigged my alarm clock.

And that was after someone managed to half-ass my mix tapes and CDs.

What a spectacular day! (Read: I am seriously pissed off right now.)

I have to KILL someone before someone kills me.

School was long out, and I had to get home ASAP because I was the Poor Sucker – A.K.A. the overall servant of the house for the next twenty-four hours. I even have to tuck my twenty-five-year-old-brother and read him a bedtime story (only by request, though) and even do all homework to keep up geekish appearances. IT'S NINE FUCKING O'CLOCK!

Truth be told, I just look like a geek for show.

I really just get pissed off a lot and that attracts attention. My family and I participate in numerous dance competitions ever since the day I could stand.

It got really tiring after a fanboy went so far as to fucking crawl into my older sister Micah's shower, and, well, up to this day, she walks in the shower with an iron bar. (She's engaged now. Thomas, her childhood sweetheart, proposed before we left for Japan.)

You heard me. I'm in Japan, Land Of The Rising Sun.

But let's deviate from that a bit.

I. Am. Currently. In. An. Orange. And. Black. Hard-rock. Outfit.

And there's a cat-boy watching me.

You heard me. CAT-boy. He's got cat ears, and a tail to boot.

He watches as numerous orange sparkles flit off me and disappear into the night air.

And, of course, like the confused little sixth-grader I am, all that can be possibly articulated is:

"What the hell?"

Let's assess the damage, shall we?

I'm wearing a leather spike collar choker with matching bracelets. There's a leather zip-up sleeveless vest, and tiny, itty-bitty black boy shorts.

My hair is gelled and the pin-up wig is totally gone. My black hair is just tossed around and shot through with more orange in addition to the white strand in front of my face.

I decided:

Dispose of the witness FAST.

Only one thing was stopping me.

No weapon on hand.

Crap. Gotta dispose of all known evidence, NOW! I tell myself. I don't want to expose the entire Samson family to the public and be the next victim of the could-be sport fanboy shower-hopping.

Then use your mad guitar skillz, yo! I hear from…within me? Am I dreaming again?

If so, this is a trippy dream.

HOW? I mentally scream, hoping for Eerie Voice to pick up the damn phone.

Leave it to me, bandmate! Eerie Voice replied.

Almost immediately a bass guitar appears in my hand. Orange and black, same color scheme I've got.

"O…kay, what now?"

Well, I could use this thing to jog Cat Boy's memory. Yeah, that should work.

A maniacal grin spreads on my face. If that doesn't make him shut up, then the guitar will.

Worst mistake ever.

My eyes make contact with his. I completely shut down. His hair is a dark blue, same as his eyes. I don't know what happens, but whatever I see in his eyes makes me want to put a hand over mine.

"Samson Reagan was it?" He says. Okay, now the deal was sealed. I was love shot.

In the words of the awesomest talk show host ever, "I can feel (insert person's name here) undressing you with his/her eyes."

Yeah. Ellen Degeneres describes this moment perfectly.

But that time it was on American Idol.

This time it's happening. For real.

And I committed Worst Mistake Ever # 2 without knowing.

I was falling.

No, not the lovey-dovey variety, where I see a cute boy and – poof! – instant crush.

I'm seriously falling backwards.

And as soon as I gain some semblance of stillness, I open my eyes. Strangely, I see the moon before I see Cat Boy's blue eyes. I look again at the moon, feeling the blood that that rallied up to my face.

What gives, bandmate? Eerie Voice says. I thought you were gonna bash his family jewels in!

Sense jolts back into me as soon as I feel warm breath on my neck. "You've got the scent."

"Oh, damn it!" I curse, aiming a kick at Cat boy's face. Glad the shorts aren't leather, either. He avoids the attack, jumping to a farther position.

He smirks at me.

A tinier Cat Boy floats into view, carrying the pinstripe egg I owned.

"Ikuto! I got the egg, ~Nya!" Its tiny, diminutive voice yells.

Alright, now Cat Boy has a name. Ikuto, huh? Well, it's only fair. He knows my full name.

Then the reality of it all hit me like a bullet to the chest.

Tiny Cat Boy had my egg.

Ikuto knows my full name.

I am less than a hair close to being swarmed by the media.

But first things first. They are jacking my eggs!

…I think that sounded perverted just now.

"Who are you?" I yelled, letting at least a fraction of my anger out. Okay, maybe…all of it at once. I'm completely pissed off right now.

"Just a little alley cat wanting some attention."

"Well, go piss off someone else!"

Atta girl, bandmate! Show 'im we take no prisoners! And as Eerie Voice says so, I remember the guitar left abandoned on the grass beside me.

I watch him very carefully, steering clear off Ikuto's eyes and crotch. I need to make sure he doesn't get the drop on me.

And a chain of events happen:

I grab hold of the guitar's neck.

I lose sight of Ikuto as soon as I relish my moment of triumph.

I attempt a baseball swing – and send something flying.

I fall flat on my ass.

Wow, bandmate, you sure can give them a hit! Pun not needed or intended!

Itty-Bitty Cat Boy flits up to the K.O'D Ikuto."Ikuto!"

In Itty-Bitty Cat Boy's moment of weakness, I snatch my pinstripe egg back.

"Hey!" Itty-Bitty Cat Boy shouts. "We stole that first!"

"Well, I owned this to begin with, so taste defeat which I have so well dished out on you!" I retort, wishing to retort the 'finger' at the two Cat Boys.

At that moment, I lose the wild, strong energy that allowed my anger to roam free and I see my new attire revert back to my Seiyo Academy Uniform.

A tiny person wearing orange and black floats up to my face,

"Pretty good, bandmate! But now I know you really go for the tall, dark, and handsome types!" I blush at her observation. "Anyway, name's Roxy! High five!"

Of course. She looks like a person fit for entertaining hard rock fans on a stage in the desert. I oblige with the high five very gently. I very much enjoy her carefree but devious smile.

"Hey, Roxy?"

"Yeah?"

BANG!

Roxy drops to the ground, her head smoking. I'll have to pick her back up later. I saunter forward, balling my hand into a fist in case of emergency.

Ikuto's still conscious, but I don't know for how long. I thank slacking off for this. I could've killed him if I had still practiced fighting.

Could've.

Sure hope he knows how and why this just happened to me.

"Hey," I say, gripping his collar in a manner that I don't think was very comfortable for the receiving end of the pain. "What the hell is going on here?"

"You put him down ~ Nya!" Tiny Cat Boy pipes up. Though he's giving me a bold response, he's hiding behind Ikuto's arm.

"I will if I find out what's happening."

"Leave him out of this."

I turn back to the conquered-by-a-guitar Ikuto. "Glad you survived. Now, unless you want to replay your saddening defeat, I suggest you tell me something about this now."

"Twenty questions, then?"

"I'll handle anything as long as it doesn't involve you getting the drop on me again."

He smiles. I take it as my cue to begin. I take a deep breath. I believe I be staying here for some answers a while longer. "How do you know my name?"

"The Guardians were taking extra precautions for you, and my curiosity instantly peaked. I just tricked the information out of the Kiddy King."

"Why did you find me so interesting?"

"You make a perfect toy."

"For what?" I nearly growled. I didn't know that pigheaded men had nerd girl fetishes from time to time.

"My amusement, for lack of a better word." he says. As soon as he says that, I find his hand below my chin and our foreheads are touching.

TOUCHING, I say!

And that is why I left the man with a roll of bandages, possible hemorrhage, broken ribs, and a very displeased Itty Bitty Cat Boy.

I carefully pick up Roxy and the rest of my belongings. The pinstripe egg goes back in its makeshift house: a cardboard box filled with soft handkerchiefs. "That fucker's gonna die someday..." I console myself.

And so begins the stupid adventure that would lead me even closer to the fork in the road.

"Come on Roxy. It's lasagna night and dinner's on me."