This is the first fic I've written. I had a blast writing it, and had fantastic help. HUGE thank you to Razzle and Spiras Stargate!

Disclaimer: All of this belongs to the magnificent J.K. Rowling.


"Ah Mr. Malfoy, if you'll excuse me, I must speak with the new Care of Magical Creatures Aid for a moment," McGonagall indicated a young woman I recognized as a Hufflepuff. She smelt of burnt paper and wood. The dim Hufflepuff accidentally set a table on fire in the library. How the hell does someone even manage to do that?

I gave her a silent, sharp nod in response, and took a seat while the two of them entered her study and closed the door.

I'm still not quite positive how I ended up in this bloody office. It looks pretty much the same as ever; dimly lit, books filling the many shelves, magical items and various trinkets strewn about, portraits of former Headmasters and Headmistresses covering the walls. The occupants of the portraits are dozing, or pretending to be, as my eyes pass over them.

This deserves a serious sneer - I never thought I'd end up back here. No one else would have me, I suppose. Should I be thankful or ashamed? A bit of both?

After I was sentenced to two years in Azkaban, I was -ahem- lucky enough to be released after a month or so. Overcrowding and good behavior, they said. It's more likely that it was Potter's conscience getting to him. Unfortunately for me, this strict parole was no more than prison at home. A year of house arrest with my parents, Narcissa and Lucius Malfoy. Three Malfoys in one home for a year. No outings, no visitors. Just us and the elves... Pure hell. Needless to say, the moment the spell binding me to the Malfoy Manor dissolved, I was out and was never going back.

Anyway, here I am. Sitting in Headmistress McGonagall's office, with barely a sickle to my name. Bloody Ministry. Froze my personal Gringotts account. "Froze" meaning, spent my bloody money on some stupid (and probably useless) new programs about who knows what! They spent my money! I was outraged! I'm STILL outraged! It would figure that I'm practically broke until I get my trust fund on my twentieth birthday. I may be pretty, and I may have charm and class, but apparently, I have no luck. Something had to be done about this money (or lack of) situation. Gag.

To cut a long story short, as I soon as I regained my "freedom" (don't think I haven't noticed Aurors keeping an eye on me), I decided I'd be doing magical students everywhere a favor by sharing my vast knowledge. Orrrrr McGonagall took pity on me and offered me the job. Gryffindors. The selfless touches of consideration and generosity make me want to roll my eyes.

Aunt Andromeda says she must have been desperate. Ha, ha, ha.

I've never had to work a day in my life, besides Quidditch practice and studying for exams. I never thought I would have to. Believe me, I sure as hell don't want to. I don't even know how to do laundry! Not that I need to or anything, ha.

Nevertheless, say 'hello' to the new Hogwarts Potions Master. Are you as repulsed and/or as shocked as I am? Well, it could be worse... I could be off chasing criminals all day, every day. Ha, Potter. Malfoys are much too pretty for that kind of work. Then there's Granger: Wizard University. Borrringgg. Weasley, though, a professional Quidditch Keeper

Not that I'd ever admit to being jealous of a Weasley. Don't you even suggest it! Malfoys don't get jealous. We already have everything we want.

The door to the study opens and the Headmistress steps out with the young woman, "Mr. Malfoy please excuse me for a little longer. We need to go to the library for a moment. Feel free to thumb through the current first year potions book on my desk until I get back."

Ugh. With a grimace, I reach out take the book in question. During my extended visit to the Manor, I had nothing better to do than read. I may be naturally gifted with knowledge like none other, but I truly hate reading. There was a time when I had better things to do than read, or rather, had the freedom to do better things. I had better things to do, then, too. I just couldn't do any of those things. Still, you should see the Manor's library. Even I have to concede to the brilliance of it. It's one of the largest private collections in Britain. Endless rows of bookshelves stacked to the ceilings, each like a mouth full of teeth. Many of them priceless first editions, some of which are the only known copy left in existence. Not that I care much. But Granger practically wet herself the first time she saw it.

Oh yes, Granger has been in the Malfoy library. She accompanied Potter, who was on official Ministry business, to the Manor. She never did tell me why she decided to go along with him. Granger ended up waiting in the front hall for nearly an hour, while Potter spoke with father privately, and I, without better a conversational option for the last year, stepped over to talk to her and ended up showing her around the first floor.

The House elves spent a week scourgifying everything she touched on Lucius's orders, but the look on her face when she walked into the Library was worth father's annoyance. I still have trouble keeping my laughter to myself when I picture it!

Even with my poor luck, I fared better than a lot of other the Slytherins in my year. Zabini ran off to Italy before the final battle - I haven't seen him since; Nott is stuck doing "community service" for the next year and a half (by community service, I mean working as a janitor at the Ministry of Magic. Oh, how the mighty have fallen; I almost coughed on the irony); Daphne Greengrass is still on house arrest, as is Pansy. People are still a bit upset with Pansy for offering up Potter to the Dark Lord. I've really got to stop calling Volders that, it makes people even more frightened of me. (Hm, on second thought, I don't think I'll stop. )

If you were wondering how Lucius and Narcissa managed to get out of serving time in Azkaban (or in Lucius's case, the Kiss), that's too bad. Not going to tell you. Just kidding, might as well.

Of course, matters of the conscience always come down to Potter. Heroic Potter. Savior Potter. The-git-that-won't-die Potter.

Narcissa getting off with only a year of house arrest was expected. She did save Potter's life, after all. Half the wizarding world was shocked when they heard she did. A Malfoy risking their life! A Malfoy going against the Dark Lord to save the poster child for the light! I was shocked when I heard it, too. I still think she shouldn't have bothered.

Father, though. I guess Potter was so stunned by Narcissa's stunt that he took Lucius's last minute switch to the light side into consideration. I personally think he did it to spite me. Or maybe he was drunk. It could go either way. He spent days lobbying for pardons for so-called criminals. Not that Lucius isn't a criminal - he most certainly is. Now he sits at home in his office under a monitored house arrest, and he'll be doing so for another year.

And then there's Severus. Mother was rather touched by the honors that were given to my Godfather for his services during the war. Narcissa Malfoy, seen as cold and heartless by nearly everyone actually cried when she heard.

I think I heard something about Sirius Black's criminal charges being expunged, too, but mother never did like her cousin.

Somehow, the Malfoys were lucky. I dunno how it happened. As I've mentioned, for some reason, luck has always evaded me. I have no idea why it would want to. Everyone and everything wants to be associated with me. Even inanimate things whose existence can't be proven. Can't blame 'em, I'm pretty bad ass. Not to mention intelligent, attractive, witty, sexy - you get the point, I'm sure. Anyway, the general public was shocked. A bit angered, too. Naturally, since Potter requested it, they let it go. The git will never let me live it down.

I hear a sound and look up from the text. McGonagall is back. I feel my hands starting to shake and my heart beating a little faster. I think I might actually be getting nervous No, Malfoys don't get nervous. I must just be tired. I can handle this!

"Good afternoon, Mr. Malfoy," she says to me. There's a slight quirk to her lips that makes it seem like she's trying to hide a smile. I didn't even know the old Queen Gryffindor Lioness could smile. Especially at Slytherins? "As you know, students arrive one month from now. You'll need to arrive the week before term starts to get settled in. Ahh, and this being your first year teaching, you'll need to go over your lessons with another Professor to make sure they're in order."

Wonderful, lesson plans... suppressing a groan at this is harder than you'd think.

"You'll be shown to your rooms the day you arrive. You're expected to attend at least two meals a day in the Great Hall," she continues. Think she'll notice if I tune her out?

"Mr. Malfoy... I have another offer for you."

It tales me a few seconds longer to than it should to force my vocal cords into use. Oh Merlin, this is embarrassing. I manage to choke out, "Yes, Headmistress?"

"With Professor Sinestra's retiring at the end of this next school year, it seems that there will be no Head of Slytherin House. Would you be interested in filling the position when the time comes?"

Hmm... Hmmmmm... "Head of Slytherin? Would I get a pay raise?" What? I had to ask!

"Yes, Mr. Malfoy," McGonagall replies with a chuckle.

"Sold!" Though I'm pretty sure even without the extra money, I would have said yes. Head of Slytherin house!

"Congratulations, Professor Malfoy." Is she smiling at me again? Merlin, her eyes are even twinkling! What have I gotten myself into?

I move to stand, there's so much to be done before-

"Oh, and Professor?"

"Yes, Headmistress?"

"Do send my regards when you visit Harry and Ginny for tea, Sunday." That bloody eye twinkling.

I really don't need the reminder of my weekly tea with Potter & Co right now. I bite my tongue and nod.

Make friends with those in high places. At least, that's what I pretend the reason that Potter and I have become... *gag* friends is. If I were being honest, I'd tell you he's a pretty nice bloke. Good thing Malfoys aren't honest.

"Now if you'll excuse me, I have to return to the Library and help that young aid restore her burned text books. It's good to see you doing well, Professor. Have a pleasant day."

Well, the meeting has gone better than expected. I deserve a reward! Hey, I wonder if my witch still has her Hogwart's uniform. Oooooh, that could be fun.

"How did it go, Draco?" Merlin, my witch looks good today. I have to fight not to stare.

"Just awful. Care to cheer me up?" Wink, wink.

"How might I do that?" she teases. Oooh, this will be easier than I thought.

"I'm sure you could think of something, 'Mione." Ha.

The smile she gives me warms me to the core. Maybe I do have a little bit of luck with me, after all.