1Disclaimer: I actually Have them hiding in my dorm closet. Ok so I don't own them...
A/N: I'm not sure I'm really happy with the way this one turned out. But every writer has to have a bad story out there I guess. That being said. Let me know what you think.
Insomnia
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Sam was restless. He couldn't sleep, no matter what he did. The demon's words flitted through his head in an endless cycle. "I have plans for you, and all the children like you." Other bits and pieces were slowly added to the torturous cycle, until his head resounded with a cacophony thoughts. "There's a war coming and you, your daddy, and your brother are smack dab in the middle of it." "You're the soldiers for this little war." "If you can't save him, kill him." "Save me from what?" his mind screamed. Throwing back the covers, unable to take their smothering weight, he got out of bed, sparing a quick glance at his brother, praying silently that Dean didn't wake up. "God knows he needs sleep."
As all these thoughts ran around his head, he began to pace. His logical, lawyer side kicked in, "A war was coming. This much is generally excepted. What does that mean? ... Soldiers. A war is fought by soldiers." Sam ran a hand through his hair and let out a breath. "Who are the soldiers? Us. The special kids." As despair began to set in at the thought of himself being used to commit atrocities of the Bastard Demon's devising, something halted the onset of the deep black abyss that not even Prozac would fix. A new line of thought was opened to him, and as he tentatively followed it, a little hope returned to him. "War's entail two sides!" He smacked himself. "How could I have been so stupid! There is always two sides to every conflict. A choice. Well no way in hell am I fighting for that bastard ... So I need to find the commander or recruiter of the other side... what if there isn't one?" Sam refused to let that thought bring him down off the small reprieve he had gained. "Well, then, I'll have to be one. I don't want anymore of the kids like me hurt. And I will kill him for Jess, Mom, Dad, and for everything he has put my family through." Sam's jaw set in a hardness that would rival the adamance of diamonds. He had a purpose now. He didn't feel so lost and out of control in the world. He only hoped Dean would understand. This is what Sam had to do, and he would do whatever necessary to reach the others like him and stop the Demon's hold on them. He had to, had to believe he could save them. Had to hold on to the hope that by saving the others, he could find redemption for himself, even if it meant sacrificing himself. He prayed it wouldn't come to that, he really didn't want to leave Dean alone. After all Dean was the rock he turned to when nothing seemed to go right, but he couldn't rely on Dean forever. It was time he stood for himself. He had to. "I hope Dean's beside me through it all. He may not be able to fix it for me this time, but I'd feel better knowing he has my back."
Feeling slightly more at rest, Sam crawled back in bed. Glancing at his brother a final time, he silently pleaded "please, Dean, please understand why."
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A/n: Yeah I know really short. But it ties well into a longer chapter fiction I am currently working on, so I thought I ought to post it.