This is dedicated to all my friends...please don't lose hope or faith its what keeps us all trudging along.

I had wanted to write a more centered fiction but decided I'd just do this and not bring religion into it...because i don't want to turn some off. So here it is. I hope you all like it. Yeah it's long (20 pages) but if I only put it in parts on DA.

Full Summary:

Couples: AkuZeku , XigDem, RikuZeku

Please Save Me

A shrill scream echoes into my ears and awakens me from my peaceful child dreams. Bolting upward I rub at my eyes, slightly angered that I've been woken up again. Mommy and Daddy have been talking loudly a lot of nights but Mommy says that it's okay that they're just talking and nothing else...I don't believe her.

My small seven year old feet touch down onto the chilled floor. Yawning I step over to the door and twist the brass knob. Another scream bounces off the walls. I quicken my pace so that I arrive at my parents' room. Cracking it open I peak my head past the door.

Full bodied frame has several cuts. Dark skin is spotted with blood. Shoulder-length silver-gray hair is stuck to his face with perspiration. Venomous purely golden eyes, that only hold hatred, turn to me.

I allow my eyes to drift over to where his had previously been occupied. Tears well up in my eyes and threaten to spill over as I comprehend the situation.

I collapse next to Mommy's side and grasp at her nightgown. "Please Mommy?"

Her fingers grab at my arm as she tries to say something. But the only thing that bubbles out is metallic liquid no matter how hard she tries. Smokey blue rimmed in dark blue orbs plead with me but I can't seem to decode her message.

Daddy tosses the phone on the bed and sits down beside me with a tear stricken face. I'm pulled into his lap even though I struggle to get back to Mommy. Finally I calm as I let the waterworks begin.

The crimson covering Mommy's stomach blurs into that of her face. I try to close my eyes but the image stays despite all the effort.

Daddy whispers comfort into my ear as he rocks me, "It's okay Zexion. Mommy will be okay."

The voice alters to that of another child holding onto me, "I'm here for you Zexion."

If only I had known that those words could never have been so wrong. Ten years later and it's still just as painful.

I jolt up and into a sitting position as sweat sticks my shirt to my chest. My beating heart begins to slow as my mind realizes that it was only a dream...only a dream now.

Throwing my legs over the edge of the bed, I glance at the clock. It reads 6:00A.M. and if I don't hurry I'll be late for school. I stride into the bathroom to take a shower and then get dressed in the usual attire; jeans, black long-sleeved shirt, and charcoal shaded boots.

I drag the comb through my slate hair. I pull back the hair that falls over my right eye and apply the inky eyeliner. I don't feel up to really doodling myself up today.

The only person whose opinion matters to me is the guy that I've loved what seems like forever. He flirts with me constantly so it should be obvious that he cares. He knows all about what happened and more. I've told him how a detective had approached me and asked me if there was anything else I remembered about that night. The detective later told me how he believes that Xemnas, my horrible father, killed my Mother.

After that...I began going over that night again and again in my head...it all made sense too. The "robber" had never been found nor identified. Plus, nothing was stolen. Xemnas has a gun in the side table that he could've used. A knife was used but that wasn't found either...well I found it but before I could turn it into the police, Xemnas had confiscated it from me and that's were it all had began.

Grabbing my keys and satchel, I exit this nightmare house and slip into my little silver Intrepid. I set my things in the seat behind me and back out of the driveway. I just need to pick up Lexaeus and then head for the school.

Personally, I think Xemnas had planned his whole life out. Maybe Mom wanted to leave him or something and that ruined his plan. Either way, he had moved us from the big city down to this small town where your neighbor lives about a mile away and the town itself is even farther. At least the roads are paved.

I put the car in park and wait as Lexaeus walks over to the passenger side. Lexaeus wears jeans, a brown tee, tennis shoes, and a jacket. He looks the same every day and never seems to change. He's the rock that holds steady while all the sand seems to wash away.

Sitting into the set he rubs the back of his rusty auburn, spiked, short hair. "Did you sleep any Zexion?"

"I got plenty."

The conversation always ends there. I told all my friends what I had told Axel and they believe me. But they know that they can't do anything to help me so they stay silent and try to reassure me that it will be okay.

Last time I was told that, Mom died.

!_!_!_!_!_!_!_!

With half the day behind me, I head to lunch. I have no classes with any of my friends except lunch. I don't buy the food here so I head to our table and take my designated spot. A blonde synthesized mow-hawk and mullet bobs through the crowd until finally the owner drops down onto the bench next to me.

Eyes that are so full of life and that are the purest color of the sky land on me. "Hey Zexy! How you doing today?"

I let a small smile cross my lips while I groan for pretend at the nickname he had bestowed upon me. "Just waiting on Axel."

Demyx shakes his head and I know that he doesn't approve of the red head at all. I just didn't fall in love with someone he wanted me to. I can't be like him and know who I should be with like him with Xigbar.

Lexaeus takes the seat across from me, "Leave him alone Demyx. If he wants to be with Axel, let him."

"But Axel's never committed!"

"Leave it be Demyx."

With a disgruntled humph he pouts until Xigbar comes over. The black haired eighteen year old has silver streaking through his long ponytail. A scar adorns his left cheek while his right eye is covered by an eyepatch. No one asks any more because after it had happened, Xigbar could not stop bragging about it.

Digits trail over my shoulder and I peak out the corner of my eye to spot Axel. I stand up and follow him out to the picnic tables. Because of the frigid weather, no seniors sit out here until spring.

I take a seat on the end of one of them while he goes down on his knees in front of me. My eyes close as he runs his hand through my short hair and I shudder.

I'm still not use to his touch. It's like my body does not want him...but...I'm sure my heart does.

"Zexion...we need to change our relationship."

He's going to commit to me! Demyx was wrong!

Axel returns to his full height and smiles. Even though it's faced toward me...it's as though I'm not the subject of his happiness.

But...how could this happen?

Blonde spikes appear from behind Axel. "Roxas, go make sure that Zexion and I are excused for the rest of the d day and that no one questions."

That's right. Roxas and his friend Sora work in the offices as aids to the record keepers.

Roxas nods and begins walking off back into the school. On the other hand, Axel pulls me to my feet. "Let's go back to my place. My brother's at work so it'll just be us."

Normally I would never think of doing something like this. Something so spontaneous and reckless. But I love him...don't I?

I'm lead further into the rear of the school grounds where he pushes a shrub aside to reveal a hole in the fence.

The only way to get out without being spotted.

I drove us over to his house with his directions. I lock up my car and follow him up to the door where he pulls his keys from his pocket and unlocks the door. The second the door clicks into place, I'm slammed up against it as his lips smash against mine.

Axel yanks away and basically drags me over to the door leading to his room. I'm shoved down into the mattress as he crawls on top of me. Practically ripping our clothing off, he can't seem to be gentle at all.

!_!_!_!_!_!

I lie with my head on his chest as he stares at the lids covering his eyes. His arms lie limp at his sides, but I don't mind. He might just be tired. Maybe it's his first time doing something like this too.

Calloused fingers run over my torso and give me chills of...is it fear?

Fear of being vulnerable? No. Of being in a relationship? No I can't say that is it. Of being hurt? No not this kind of fear. Of the foreboding feeling that comes from this fear? Yes...I think that's it.

"Zexion...how was it?"

"Amazing."

If I don't lie...I might drive him away. His brutality made it un-enjoyable and all I got out of it was pain.

"You did good yourself."

For once, I brush the hair totally away from my face and turn my face toward him, "You think so?"

"Yes...but...unfortunately...Well I don't know how to put this."

"Put what?"

That dark cloud darkening over me...is coming ever so closer...I can feel it.

"I'm flattered that you like me and that you're so good in bed but I don't think this is going to work."

"What does that mean?"

"You're a smart boy, figure it out! I. Do. Not. Like. You."

I climb into a sitting position and glare at the wall. "I did not just like you Axel. I loved you."

"Well you'll just have to get over it. Now hurry, get dressed and leave. Saix is coming over and I don't want him to see you here."

I...I was just a test dummy to him. Nothing more than a way to see if he could please his real lover.

Throwing the sheets off, I yank everything on and leave. I shut the door behind me as I head to my car. Getting in, I start the engine and begin home so I can try and not be late tonight. On the outside, my composure stays solid but on the inside...the walls are cracking.

I get caught in traffic thanks to the fact that we had just laid there for an hour or so. Now I'll be late getting home and Xemnas will not be happy.

Pulling into the driveway it's already starting to get dark. As I lift myself out of the car I wince while pain shoots through me. I bite my lip and throw my satchel over my shoulder before locking up the car. The front door is unlocked and I know what's going to happen automatically.

Edging the door open I set my bag by the door so that it can't be used against me. Keeping my back to the walls and facing any open doorways where Xemnas could be, I slowly make my way to the stairs.

Just as the toes of my boot touch the carpeted wood, a voice echoes in my ears. "Why are you late Zexion?"

Taking a deep breath, I straighten and turn around to come back to face with the man I utterly despise. Those golden orbs of pure hate bury into me and I can't help but cringe away from him.

"It had better not be a lame excuse like last time. You were doing so good."

"I...I was with a f-friend."

"Doing what Zexion? What could take you all these hours?"

"I was caught in traffic."

Hearty laughter forces me against the wall, "You think that's a good excuse?"

"N-No..."

A hand launches out and grabs the collar of my shirt. I'm yanked forward and he glares down at my collar. Looking down myself I realize my mistake. My frantic eyes dart back up to meet his and the anger is tangible.

"With a friend were you? I don't recall you to be the boy to walk out of the house with his shirt on inside out."

"I-I guess I-I didn't notice."

He releases me and holds the glare. "Not only are you a fag but now you've corrupted yourself. You're dirty and now no one will want you. You're nothing to me. You had might as well be dead like your Mother! You both are completely useless, one in the damned same! No one loves you! Just get out of my face!"

I scurry up the steps as I trip over my own feet. Managing to get up the steps I hurry into my room where I lock the door and collapse against it. I can't believe I was so weak.

Tears sting at my eyes and I can't help but not let them spill over. No matter how hard I tell myself that his opinion doesn't matter...the words still hurt.

Would anyone care if I died? Not Xemnas. Not Axel. I'd be with Mom so that's a good plus. All the pain would be over. God loves all his children so why should I be an exception? I hate this life...why can't it be at least easier like others. I know that most people have problems and some have it worse than me. But this is me and I can't seem to withstand this hell much longer.

Pulling my cell from my pocket I dial Vexen's number.

He'll talk and I'll listen. His words usually take me back to what I have to look forward to. To why I shouldn't give up yet.

"Hello? Zexion is it you?"

"Yeah...Are you free?"

"Free as I will be for a while. Is it your Dad again?"

The tone...does he hate me too?

"I...I don't know if I can take it anymore."

"You're being selfish Zexion. There as people that have it far worse than you do. Some are dying and can't get out of a bed. You just can't get over your Mother's death. Well think about how we would all feel if you were gone, don't you think that we would miss you?"

"I..."

"Come now Zexion stop being reckless and clear your head. Go to bed, wake up, and apologize to your Father. He's just trying to keep you safe."

"You know what Vexen...I don't think you'd miss me. Not from what you're saying. I hope you're proud of yourself for being such a great friend. Goodbye Vexen."

I chuck the phone toward the wall and it shatters into several pieces. Pushing myself to my feet, I pull out a small bag from underneath my bed. I stuff into it my life savings that I have on me and the credit card I can use to get the rest of it out of the bank before Xemnas freezes the account. I throw in a few outfits and grab my jacket off the foot of my bed. I shrug into it and grab the bag.

Edging the door open I glance around to see no signs of life. All the lights remain off and I sneak down the edge of the stairs. I know if I step in the center the stairs will creak no matter how light I step.

I pick up the satchel that I left and pull the keys out of the side pocket. I start the car up and back out of the driveway.

I'm not selfish. Xemnas killed Mom and that's that. No one can tell me otherwise. If I was gone they would not have to worry about me. They'd get over me eventually and forget that I'm missing from the picture.

I park the car at the pier and walk along it as I gaze out over the dark waters gleaming from the moon's rays. I take a band from my pocket and pull all my hair back and tie it. There may not be much but I can still tie it to keep it out of my face.

Leaning on the rail farthest from the shops lining the walk...I let the tides hypnotize me.

Drowning sounds peaceful. The waves rocking one till they can't stay any longer after the burning. It sounds nice...

Taking a deep breath, I drop my bag and climb over it. Placing the heels of my boots on the wood I grip the rail and let my body hang forward.

"So you're going to jump huh?"

Startled I whip my head around. Baby blue eyes that seem to have light shining out of them yet holds dark secrets, stare at me. Silver hair knotted in a ponytail lets few strands dangle in front of his face to add to the bangs already tempting to shroud his eyes. He steps forward and the pale skin is hit my the moon to make it milky and perfectly smooth to stand out from the shadows of the night.

"I asked if you're going to jump."

"I...I'm not sure yet. Just leave me alone."

I know that strong voice from somewhere...

"Is it because of your dad?"

"You don't know anything."

"I know that Xemnas killed your mom." I fall silent and let him continue to approach me as he talks. "I was the kid that came with the detective that night. My mom died too so Dad had to take me there. I'm use to those scenes now. Do you remember me Zexion?"

"...Yes...I do..."

Soft fingers over my own digits. "So you think by dying that everything will be better?" I nod. "Well it won't you know. You see, ever since I met you I knew something was wrong and Dad did too. So we've kept tabs on you. That guy that talked to you about Xemnas, that was a colleague of Dad's. After Xemnas moved you out here we lost you for a bit. But I've finally found you."

"Why do you care?"

"Because we can prove Xemnas did it and we need to serve him papers but we don't know where he lives. So I need you to take me to your house."

"No I can't go back there."

"Even to send him to prison?"

"I...he'll kill me...just like he did my mom...he'll make sure that it looked like an accident or worse."

He sighs, "Okay then, why don't you come back to my place? You can stay there. Do you know the address?"

I shake my head no, "I can't and I don't." I turn around so that I can hold on and face him. "You can't help me either."

"I could and I would if you'd let me Zexion...please?"

He's sincere...I can trust him...But I'm so scared...

"Please save me."

I move upward so that I can sit on the railing. He rests his hands on my knees. "See was that so hard?"

He steps back and gives me room to hop down. As I get ready to push off I wobble. Instead of falling forward I dip backward.

My arms flail out in front of me and he manages to catch one of them. With a grunt he snatches at me and I fly off the rail and onto the dock...no...onto him.

Strong arms are wrapped around me and they feel so good. With my head on his chest...I feel so at ease.

This is the boy that had followed me through schools. Befriended me so many separate times. Each time he would act like he didn't know me so that he could talk to me above the rest of my friends. I had been waiting for him to show up at this school for some time...but he had never come.

"Are you going to get off or sleep here?" A faint blush lights my cheeks as I stand up and help him up as well. "Alright let's get back. Dad's waiting on my results." He leads me to his car and I leave with him to his home.

I had never told anyone. Everyone thought that Axel was the object of my love and he was. But I had sworn to keep my heart locked away for him. However when Axel came along...I was hopelessly waiting for him and Axel's charm won me over instantly. It just took three and a half years for him to finally catch up with me.

I get out of the car and follow behind him as he unlocks the front door. He lives in the city part while I live in the rural nothingness. No wonder he didn't find me.

"I was going to enroll into the school tomorrow but since I found you I guess there's no need since I've already graduated. Skipped a few grades after we couldn't find you."

"Riku is that you?"

"Yeah Dad, I found Zexion!" He smiles down at me, "Come on he doesn't bite." He leans down to my ear, "Although, I do occasionally."

In the kitchen sits a man resembling Riku except for his eyes are striking green-blue and his hair so much longer that it touches his waist. Through glasses he nods at me, "I'm glad that Riku finally found you...but where at this time?"

"I found him at the pier."

"Tell me why Zexion."

Riku pulls out a chair for me and I collapse into it. Riku's dad pulls out a notebook and a pen. "Tell me all that you can."

"Well...um...Sir..."

"Just call me Sephiroth, Dad or Sir makes me feel old."

With that comment he directs a quick glance at Riku who is busy making something at the counter. Riku hands me a glass of hot chocolate and stands behind me with his hands on my shoulders. It's as if he's my boyfriend the way he touches me.

I begin to tell Sephiroth all about these years of suffering and how Xemnas beats me with words and nothing more than a sharp pull or push nothing that leaves a physical wound.

Riku takes the cup away and places it in the sink before returning to me. "Well let me go show him to the bathroom and we'll be out of your hair okay pops?"

"Riku I'm going to get you-"

"Night!"

Riku drags me away and up the stairs. He stops in front of a door. "Go ahead and go in and get a shower. I'll bring you some clothes to wear to bed." I go to object when I realize that I left my bag in the car. "I'll go get your bag."

He goes into another room and I enter the bathroom. I peel off the clothes that I've worn all day and through all this mess...this mess I've become. I turn the water on and step in. I don't think I even I heard Riku come in and leave the material on the counter but he did.

I dig out a pair of boxers and slip into his slightly bigger sweatpants. The shirt is simply black and is like the pants...just a little over my own size. I run my fingers through my hair and make sure that it covers my eye perfectly. I smile at my reflection and stuff everything back into my bag before walking out.

I make my way to the room Riku had gone into earlier to find that it is indeed his room. He sits up at my entrance and walks over to me, inspecting me. "Little big huh?" He nods to the pants that hang on one hip.

Fingers lower down to the rim and I feel my heartbeat immediately speed up at the chance touch of fingers against my stomach as he pulls them up. Riku tightens the strings and leaves it in a bow. "Better?"

I nod and a smile graces those light pink lips of his. I'm led over to the bed. "You'll be sleeping here. I'll take the couch downstairs."

"I couldn't kick you out of your own bed. I'll sleep on the floor."

"Um no sorry not agreeing there. Lay down and get some sleep. It's almost midnight Zexy."

"Z-Zexy?"

"You don't want me to call you that?"

"Zex or Zexion is just fine thank you."

"Anything for you babe."

Riku could never be more a more confusing man.

He takes the chance and places a chaste kiss on my lips. A shudder rolls through my body and I can't stop him from noticing.

"What's wrong?"

"I...the guy I like just blew me off completely...after..."

Hands rest on my hips and pull me forward. "I would never leave you Zex and you know that. I just want to help you...let me."

All logical sense tells me to get away and let him go sleep on that couch so he'll leave me be. But that's not what I want...no...the total opposite.

Riku edges me down to the mattress while his kisses trail along my jaw and neck. Lying underneath him he finally stops and looks me in the eye, "We've loved each other for a long time. I can see the longing in your eyes and I know I've longed for you."

My eyes dart toward the door indicating the blaring TV from downstairs.

"Sephiroth never comes up here. His room is down there. Plus, he'll be working all night long to finish pulling things together."

"Just hold me?"

"Sure."

He can't hide the disappoint and neither can I. But I don't want it just yet. Not tonight. I wouldn't be able to completely enjoy it as I know I will later.

I'm pulled against his chest and I rest against him...easily able to let his heartbeat lull me to sleep.

I never could have imagined the bliss I feel from just waking up and knowing that Riku is still beside me.

I brush strands of silver from his face and smile...a real smile like the ones I would give Mom. Ones that always made her giggle and squeeze me in a bone breaking hug.

Unfortunately I have to go back today or they'll never find Xemnas.

Riku intertwines our fingers and he opens his eyes. "Good morning wonderful."

"Why are you so happy?"

"Because I love you and now you're with me...for good?"

"For good..."

We lie like this for a few more seconds before getting up and dressing. Riku and I hurry down to see if Sephiroth is up yet and thankfully he is. I want to get this over with as soon as possible.

I get in the backseat with Riku while I give Sephiroth directions at where to turn. In less than an hour, thanks to his crazy speeds, we're at my house with two police cars on there way here.

Getting out of the car I lead them to the door which I have to unlock. I gaze over the insides and turn back to them, "I don't think he's here."

"Then we'll wait for the others to get here. We need to question him so he'd had better not left."

But...I have evidence...

"Wait! Mom kept a diary and I hid it in my room. You don't need one with that. I've never looked in it but I'm sure it'll help she wrote all the time."

"Alright, Riku take him in there and keep your gun on you."

"You're an officer?" I ask as I glance at him.

"I told you I graduated early."

Shrugging I step inside and bound up the stairs with Riku behind me. Below us, I hear Sephiroth enter with his comrades to search the lower level. I push the door open and hurry over to my desk. Retrieving the key from under the cushion of my computer chair, I unlock the drawer and grab the small black and blue dairy with silver lettering.

Nodding to Riku I head out of the room with him behind me. Just as I step over the threshold, a force knocks into me and sends me to the ground.

Hard set eyes glower at me as his fingers easily encircle my neck, effectively cutting off my air supply.

I know Riku's moving because the next thing I know I can breath and Xemnas slams Riku into the cream colored wall. Fingers try to pry the hand at his throat instead of going for the gun.

I drop the book and charge at the man that ruined my life.

I land on top of him and before I can blink, his fist plants itself into my jaw several times before I'm shoved off.

Can I do nothing right?

Sephiroth heard the noise for sure. But by the time he gets up the stairs, Xemnas is moving for me again...dead men don't talk.

My ears ring from the sudden blast from Riku's gun.

Xemnas collapses to the ground beside me as the two officers run forward to haul him away. Hatred fumes in those yellow eyes but it's no use. He can't do anything to me. The bullet may have only hit him in the shoulder but it was enough to stun him.

Riku helps me up and with the sleeve a tissue handed to him from Sephiroth, dabs at the blood leaking from my mouth and nose.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

Striding out of the courthouse I manage to get away from the reporters and over to Riku waiting at the curb with the car. A grin of pure happiness now occupies my face instead of the frown that was the previous resident. Now that Xemnas has been committed for murder and assault...things will be much better.

Stopping before him he envelops me in his embrace before pushing me back. "I have something to give you to make this evening even more rememberable."

Going down on one knee, Riku reveals a stormy blue velvet box. Cracking it open I see the silver band resting on the puffed pillow of black silk.

"Will you marry me?"

"Y-Yes of course I will."

As I pull Riku into a hug he smiles, "After you finish school I'll marry you. I've already got a nice house we can move to in Radiant Gardens. We can get out of Traverse Town once and for all."

"I love you Riku."

"I love you Zexion."

While the reporters slowly begin to return their attention back to our engagement, Riku already has me in the car and we're driving away...only a few more months and I can leave...leave with the man I love.

I wanna get back to the rest of me. I wanna spend the rest of my life alive. ---- Mess of Me ---- Switchfoot