Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars, etc.

A Few Too Many

Ryloth was a planet of dry, rocky desert landscapes, mountain ranges with mist–covered peaks, and stretching valleys. To look upon it, one might wonder why exactly the Separatist army had targeted the tiny world, and fought so long and hard to conquer it. Sadly, the truth was that its people had repeatedly come under fire for no other reason than the tactical advantage of its location. The recent invasion of the Outer Rim territory was just another instance in a long list of attacks orchestrated by the treacherous Count Dooku.

The Twi'leks had already suffered and lost too much to a conflict that had nothing to do with them, but the vile Separatist leader had waged war on the battle–weary natives yet again. The latest siege had commenced two days earlier, and Republic forces had been called into action shortly thereafter to help repel the droid occupation.

Now, after hours of relentless combat, the 501st had finally moved off the frontlines. However, there were no illusions. Soon, they would be returning to battle. They all knew it, and they all accepted it. The brief respite wouldn't last, but for the moment they were safe; taking refuge with one Cham Syndulla and his loyal band of freedom fighters. Ryloth lacked a strong military presence, but the revolutionary Twi'lek had gathered hundreds of devoted followers to his cause since the onset of the Clone War, and they had built themselves a well–hidden and heavily fortified base of operations.

Rubbing her sore neck, Ahsoka quickened her pace as she made her way through the dimly lit encampment. Every muscle in the young Togruta's body ached with each step she took. A fresh wound still stung her tender flesh where a piece of shrapnel from an exploding enemy tank had narrowly missed her head, and grazed her shoulder blade. Her clothing had been left covered in a thick layer of soot and grime, and her skin was sticky with dried sweat. Presently, few things sounded better than a soft mattress and a nice, hot shower, but she knew that such luxuries would have to wait…

She had been attempting to catch up on some much needed R&R when her commlink had chimed. Half asleep and bleary–eyed, she had rolled over in her cot and activated the small device expecting to hear her master on the other end. Instead, she had been contacted by a rather anxious sounding Captain Rex. Not one to easily fluster, the urgency of his request for assistance had immediately caught her attention. Slightly alarmed by the unmistakable tension in his voice, she had hastily vacated her temporary shelter and set out to find him without delay.

Rushing through the outpost, Ahsoka was nearly jogging by the time she locked onto her captain's homing beacon and spotted a pair of indistinguishable figures moving through the shadows. Peering through the gloom, she watched as they stumbled into view and proceeded to make their way in her direction. She halted her approach an instant later when a familiar face emerged from the darkness. Rex, straining under the weight of his bumbling companion, glanced up and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw his commander standing just ahead of him in quiet bewilderment. One arm draped around the trooper's neck, Anakin Skywalker, renowned Jedi Knight and general to the Grand Army of the Republic, prattled on unintelligibly while he staggered along.

It wasn't until they reached Ahsoka and he nearly toppled over that her master even noticed her arrival. Dashing forward, she ducked under the crook of his free arm and lent her support before he could fall over completely, and drag Rex down with him.

"Snips!" he exclaimed, visibly brightening when his gaze finally settled on his padawan. "Where did you come from?"

"As you can see, commander, we have a bit of a situation," Rex spoke up, grunting as he did his best to keep the other man standing upright.

"Did I miss something?" Ahsoka asked while she joined in the effort, and tugged on his tunic to help him recover his balance. "What's going on? Is he…"

"I'm afraid so," Rex answered her unasked question. "The general's not feeling quite like himself at the moment."

Ahsoka couldn't believe her ears. Never in her life had she seen or heard of such a thing. It was an inconceivable notion, yet here she was witnessing it for herself firsthand. A Jedi… drunk? No, that wasn't possible. Since when did Jedi consume alcohol? Especially, from what she could only assume in her master's case, had been vast quantities.

"I told you he'd never win," Anakin blurted out, clearly oblivious to the fact that he had almost taken a bad spill and landed on the ground. "I told you, didn't I, Rex? That Twi'lek's nothing but a lightweight."

Ahsoka furrowed a brow. "Twi'lek? Rex, what is he talking about?"

"We were with Syndulla and his men," Rex explained while he grasped the Jedi Knight's limp arm and, with Ahsoka's assistance, cautiously resumed walking. "They were celebrating today's victory and invited us to join in the festivities. General Skywalker accepted, so I stuck around to keep an eye on things. It started off innocently enough."

"Evidently, it didn't stay that way," Ahsoka remarked, barely managing to stifle a labored moan. She felt like her master's extra weight might crush her considerably smaller frame, but pressed on nonetheless. "How did this happen?"

"I told 'em, 'Soka… I told 'em all, but they didn't listen to me," Anakin interrupted, slurring his words as he spoke. "You should'a been there. You would've listened to me, Snips. You're a good Snips."

Struggling to keep the lumbering Jedi on his feet, Ahsoka merely sighed. "Thank you, master."

Any lingering doubts were quickly dispelled and washed away. Her wise and powerful mentor, the 'Hero With No Fear' and prophesized Chosen One, was indeed under the influence of something.

"As I was saying…" Rex trailed off, awkwardly clearing his throat before continuing. "The Twi'leks were passing around Corellian ale and something they called Gruvian Tovash. Everything was going fine until Syndulla decided to take a nip himself. Once he had a few shots in him, he challenged General Skywalker to a drinking contest."

"Drinking contest?" Ahsoka repeated in disbelief.

Grimacing, Rex nodded. "That was when they brought out the bottle of Johrian whiskey. It all went downhill from there."

"What was he thinking?" Ahsoka wondered aloud.

"He declined at first, but…" Rex trailed off again. "Well, you know the general. He isn't one to back down from a challenge."

"He's just lucky Master Kenobi isn't here to see this," Ahsoka replied.

"Snips, why don't you have any hair?" Anakin suddenly re–entered the conversation. Narrowing his eyes, he studied the top of his apprentice's head before glancing over at the bristly stubble growing from his clone captain's scalp. "You either, Rex… you cut it all off. Why do I have so much?"

Ahsoka nearly lost her hold on her intoxicated master when he clumsily lifted a hand and tousled his long, shaggy mane of dirty–blonde hair. If not for Rex tightening his grip, all three of them would likely have ended up on the ground.

"You know what? I like it," Anakin continued with his rant; shifting his focus back to his padawan, and utterly unaware that he had almost tripped and knocked them over. "Who needs hair, anyway? What's the point? It doesn't do anything special."

"How long has he been like this?" Ahsoka asked, turning her face away from the drunken Jedi Knight as the stench of whiskey on his breath assaulted her nostrils.

Rex opened his mouth to reply, but didn't get the chance.

"If anyone hassles you about not having any hair, you just let me know," Anakin proceeded without pause. Teetering to the side, he stooped forward and gave Ahsoka's lekku a brotherly pat before once again returning his attention to his captain. "And that goes for both of you. Ya hear me, Rex?"

Rex uncomfortably fidgeted. "I, uuh… I appreciate that, general."

"Maybe we should shave my head, too…" he continued, slurring his words even more than before, if that were even possible. "Whad'da ya say, Rex ol' buddy?"

"Perhaps you should sleep on it, sir," was the clone captain's only response.

"Don't worry, we're almost there," Ahsoka spoke up, detecting the apprehension in his voice.

"The sooner the better," Rex replied with a frown. "I've already seen the rations he had for his midday meal. Trust me, they look even worse coming up than they do going down."

Wrinkling her nose, Ahsoka expressed her disgust by making a low gagging noise. "Too much information, Rex."

She could have sworn she saw a faint smirk spread across his lips. "Sorry, commander."

"You two are so great," Anakin carried on without skipping a beat. "You really are, you know that? Have I ever told you how proud I am of you?"

"Yes, master, all the time," Ahsoka humored him. "We're proud of you, too."

Luckily, they reached Anakin's makeshift tent within a matter of minutes. Not wishing for the rest of Torrent Company to see their superior officer in such a befuddled state, they quickly brushed its entry flap aside and stepped through the opening. Once inside, Ahsoka and Rex guided him toward a single rickety cot; which was no easy feat, taking into account that he was larger than both of them. The portable bed creaked and groaned beneath the Jedi as he collapsed in a heap.

"There," Ahsoka panted, glad to be rid of her master's dead weight. "Safe and sound…"

"The general's going to regret this come tomorrow morning," Rex stated, folding his arms across his chest while he peered down at the cot, and its occupant. "It won't be pretty."

"Hey, at least I'll get the opportunity to lecture him for a change," Ahsoka quipped.

"Will you be needing anything else, sir?" Rex asked, eventually lowering his arms back to his sides and turning to face the worn out Togruta.

"No, I can take it from here," Ahsoka answered, mustering the best smile she could manage. "Thanks, Rex… I owe you one."

Glancing down at his already unconscious general, Rex hesitated. "Are you sure?"

"We'll be okay," Ahsoka reassured him with a tired nod.

Rex grinned. "So, should I shave his head, or do you want to do it?"

It took Ahsoka a moment to realize that her companion had actually made a joke. She couldn't contain a laugh when his grin broadened. Somehow, he always knew how to raise her spirits.

"It's been a long day," she chuckled. "Your squad will be wondering where you are. You should go and get some rest."

"Right away, Commander Tano."

Still grinning, Rex gave a brief salute before spinning on his heels and exiting the tent. Ahsoka's smile faded after she turned back to Anakin, and knelt down to remove his boots. Sprawled out on his undersized cot, arms and legs dangling over its edges, he stirred but didn't wake as she pulled them off and placed them on the ground below him. She started when he unexpectedly spoke, and broke the silence.

"Is that you, angel?" he murmured before passing out a second time, and slipping back into a deep slumber.

Puzzled, Ahsoka quirked a brow while she stared down at her catatonic master. Angel? It made about as much sense as some of the things that had come out of his mouth.

Shrugging it off, she waited another moment before moving away from the cot and sinking into a nearby military issue chair. She winced and froze when a loud squeak pierced the air. The last thing she wanted to do was rouse the other Jedi, and have to deal with his alcohol induced antics again. Fortunately, he didn't so much as twitch. Leaning back in the chair, she thoughtfully stroked her chin and studied his motionless form.

There were many things to admire about Anakin Skywalker. He was a fearless warrior, and arguably the most skilled pilot the Jedi Order had ever known. He had led soldiers into war zones and emerged virtually unscathed on countless occasions. He was brave and naturally gifted. His extraordinary talents had earned him fame and accolades throughout the galaxy, but one thing was for certain…

Anakin Skywalker definitely couldn't hold his liquor.

fin.

Author's Note:

So, there it is! For some reason, I just liked the idea of Anakin being a lightweight. As a footnote, I'm sure some of you got that the whole 'angel' thing was a Padmé reference. Hope you enjoyed the story!

~ThoseWereTheDays