Serendipity:
Part One
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A/N: This is a revised version of the story I originally posted about 5 years ago. The overall plot has not changed. I've only revised it to smooth out some of the dialogue and description. Please PM me if you would like a copy of the original!
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Characters, events, and dialogue recognizable from Dragon Age: Origins are the property of Bioware.
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You knew as soon as you saw her that she was going to be trouble. Alistair/Cousland, DAO.
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Maker, though the darkness comes upon me,
I shall embrace the light. I shall weather the storm.
I shall endure.
What you have created, no one can tear asunder.
-Trials 1:10
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When you turn and see her, you immediately make a fool of yourself. It's not surprising—you've always had trouble talking to women, and she is the most beautiful woman you've met at Ostagar. Or anywhere, really.
You blush as you take in her golden hair and serious gray eyes, but she hardly seems to notice your embarrassment. Only when she asks for your name does it dawn on you.
"You're Duncan's new recruit, aren't you?"
As she nods your heart sinks. "Elissa Cousland," she says, and sticks out a hand to shake.
You are certain you've heard the name Cousland somewhere before, but that isn't the foremost thing on your mind.
You ask her to meet you back at the fire with Duncan, watching as she walks away. Filling up with anger, you have to fight the urge to pull Duncan aside and ask him what the hell he was thinking.
It's not because she's a woman—you have met female Wardens before and all of them were absolutely fearsome. Nor is it because of her age, though you're certain Elissa must be younger than you are, or because of her size, though she seems too small to wield the sword and shield she carries.
It's a reason you're trying not to think about, one you're ashamed of, because you know full well that it's wrong for you to feel this way. In spite of a hundred objections to this notion, you can't stop the question that rises in your mind.
How could Duncan bear to taint something so pure and beautiful?
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When you reach the fire, an enormous Mabari warhound lies at Duncan's feet, eyeing you suspiciously as you approach. Before you can make a joke about Duncan's new best friend, the dog stands and starts to growl.
A small figure rushes in from the side. "Down, boy," Elissa says firmly, pulling gently on the Mabari's collar. "That's Alistair, a Grey Warden. He's friendly."
Her apologetic glance up at you turns into an irritated glare at the surprise on your face. She's right to be annoyed—you shouldn't have judged her so hastily. It's inner strength, after all, that attracts a Mabari to its owner. You look her over with new interest. What other surprises hide behind that fragile exterior?
When all three recruits have gathered, Duncan assigns them the usual task of retrieving their vials of darkspawn blood for the Joining. You stop listening once the recruits begin to whine. Courageous lot he picked this time. You're sure your own group of recruits was never this cowardly.
Then Duncan turns to you with a second task, one that is not familiar from your own Joining. When he finishes explaining it, you're as scared as the recruits are. Not because of darkspawn in the wilds or tales of witches and monsters—because this important task has been entrusted to you, the greenest Grey Warden of the lot. And you can't bear to let Duncan down.
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As you head into the Korcari wilds, you take an appraising look at the recruits. You aren't shocked by Ser Jory's obvious fear. He's not here for intelligence, skill, or bravery—he was chosen for brute force. Daveth is nervous, but seems to have mastered himself for the time being. Then you turn to Elissa, your anomaly. When you try to interpret her expression, the only way you can describe it is blank, as if she sees and hears nothing. And you don't know what to think of that at all.
During your hunt for darkspawn, the men begin to worry and wonder, certain that you will be overwhelmed by darkspawn and killed as soon as you get far enough from camp. Their talk annoys you to the point that you just blurt it out—learning that you can sense the darkspawn is finally enough to shut them up.
Your first skirmish isn't darkspawn but a small pack of wolves. You hang back to watch the recruits fight, wanting to evaluate their abilities for yourself. You are not surprised by Ser Jory's strength or Daveth's skills—you've seen them spar in camp before—so instead you watch the girl and are amazed by what you see. You had questioned whether she could really use that sword and shield, but now you know that she might give you a run for your money.
You shake your head, internally chastising yourself. You shouldn't be surprised—Duncan would never recruit someone who wasn't ready for what was to come. That would be cruelty, and while Duncan is sometimes hard, he isn't cruel. You continue to observe her, entranced by her fluid movements and singular focus, until a thought hits you. This girl is the perfect secret weapon and has no idea.
It sickens you a bit when you realize Duncan must have thought so too.
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You complete the first task quickly, the vials of darkspawn blood safely wrapped in linen in your pack. The second task proves to be more difficult. You've been attempting to make your way towards the tower marked on Duncan's rudimentary map, killing darkspawn on the way, but the wilds are far from straightforward. You wind your way through them, forced to retrace your steps more than once before you see the ruin in the distance.
As you head towards it, Ser Jory and Daveth's annoying chatter returns. Is it bad that you're not particularly looking forward to brotherhood with these two?
This time, Elissa is the one who shuts them up. A few sharp words earn their silence, and you shoot her a grateful smile which she briefly returns. Solidarity in shared annoyance. It's the first time you see a hint of a smile on her face, and you desperately want to see it again.
When you reach the ruins, the treaties are not where they are supposed to be. You bite back a curse at your ill fortune, and turn to the recruits only to see them staring at something behind you.
A witch of the wilds.
You're silenced at the sight of this woman in scraps and feathers, and Elissa suddenly takes the lead. You exchange looks with Daveth and Jory when she has a longer conversation with the witch than she's had with any of you. Women!
You're pretty sure Elissa has no idea how much danger she's in, but with her eyes so determined, none of you are willing to be more cowardly than she. The four of you follow this witch to meet her mother—who is completely insane, you're sure—and to retrieve the treaties that the elder witch claims she has protected. Her lack of obvious motivation makes you uneasy. You're relieved to leave the clearing and head back towards camp.
Daveth and Jory are finally quiet on the walk back, perhaps shocked into silence by your encounter with the two witches. But while you're enjoying the quiet, Elissa falls in step beside you and looks up with those big gray eyes.
"What can you tell me about the Joining?" she asks.
Even though you guessed this question was coming from at least one of the recruits, you're still not quite sure how to answer. You haven't had the practice in dodging this question that the older Wardens have. "It's supposed to be a secret," you say, certain that the girl can sense your discomfort.
She sighs and looks up at you plaintively. "Is it dangerous?"
"Yes," is all you can manage. You toy with the clasps on your metal bracers, unable to look her in the eye and tell her that she might die.
"Just how much danger am I in?" she asks, clearly unnerved by your demeanor. You can't meet her eyes or you'll blurt it all out like the fool you are, so you look away, ignoring the question. You just can't do it.
"If I don't…" she trails off and you finally glance over. Those deep gray eyes are pleading, filled with resignation and a profound sadness. "If anything happens, please see that my hound is well cared for."
You nod despite the lump in your throat. You can't deny her that.
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You had hoped not to attend the Joining, but such luck is not your lot today.
The eve of battle is a busy time, but tradition states that no less than two Wardens should be present for the Joining. As the most junior warden, you get the pleasure of putting off your duties until everyone else is sleeping happily in their bedrolls. You complain and are teased by your fellow Wardens, but that isn't the real reason this bothers you.
It was only six months ago that you watched one of your new brothers die, choking on the blood that you would have to drink after him.
You try your best to steel yourself, and pray to the Maker that she doesn't die. A moment later, you reprimand yourself and amend that prayer. No one should have to die like this.
It's supposed to be an honor to speak the words, the words passed down from Warden to Warden. You don't feel honored. You feel as if you'd rather be anywhere else.
"Join us, brothers and sisters.
Join us in the shadows where we stand vigilant.
Join us as we carry the duty that cannot be forsworn.
And should you perish, know that your sacrifice will not be forgotten.
And that one day we shall join you."
Duncan administers the rite to Daveth first. As he crumbles forward, you hold your breath, unable to tell if he will die. Duncan's words give you your answer. "I'm sorry, Daveth," he says, voice heavy with sorrow.
You swallow your revulsion and try not to grimace as the man writhes on the ground. You force yourself to look away, studying the other recruits' reactions instead. Anything to avoid looking at the dying man at your feet. For once, you can't blame Jory for his expression of terror, and expect a similar look from Elissa. But instead of fear, you see that same blank expression on her face, as if she isn't here at all. You're beginning to wonder if she's right in the head.
Jory pulls a sword on Duncan when the chalice is held out to him.
In the instant that follows, you feel sick. You know what's going to happen. You look away before Duncan runs him through, your stomach lurching at the sound.
When he turns to Elissa you want, more than anything, to tell her to run. Anything has to be better than this. But it's too late now for running.
You watch in silence, heart in your throat, as she takes the cup and drinks.
When she falls to the ground, Duncan says nothing. And that's when the relief envelops you. She's going to be all right.
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When she wakes up, you finally feel like you can breathe again. You offer a hand to help her up and let go quickly, trying not to think about the way her soft skin made your heart pound.
"You are a Grey Warden now," Duncan says formally, and bids you to give her the Wardens' pendant.
She seems rattled by the experience, so you pipe up. "Did you dream?"
At her odd look, you try to explain. "After my joining I had terrible dreams." You wonder what her dreams were like, thinking of your own. At second thought, you hope she didn't dream at all.
"Such things come as you begin to sense the darkspawn," Duncan tells her. "Take some time, and meet me at King Cailan's camp. He's asked for your attendance at our meeting." You find it odd that this new recruit would be invited to the war council, but Cailan is a bit strange, so you've heard. You've never met your half-brother yourself. You try not to feel bitter about it.
As Duncan walks away, you realize Elissa is holding her head with both hands "Are you all right?" you ask, then immediately berate yourself for asking a question you already know the answer to—you remember what the Joining is like. If her experience is anything like yours, she's got a splitting headache.
When she tells you she's fine, you almost roll your eyes. "The headache will be gone by morning," you promise, and a grateful look crosses her face before she wipes it away.
You follow her to lean on a low wall looking out across the wilds. She hasn't asked you to stay with her, but you feel as if she shouldn't have to be alone. She's just gone through a terrible ordeal, and even before the Joining it had been clear that something was weighing on her. You keep your peace, however—every Warden knows better than to ask about another's past without invitation.
"What is that?" she asks, and you aren't sure at first what she means. "It feels… dark," she adds in response to your puzzled expression.
You feel another flash of anger at Duncan for doing this to her, but you make an effort to push those feelings away. "You're beginning to sense the darkspawn," you explain, hating that you have to do this. "The taint in you seeks out the taint in them. It will take a bit of time before you will really be able to understand and use it."
She nods and winces, and you fleetingly wish you could do something to ease that headache. "Can they sense us too?" she asks, her grey eyes on yours for just a moment before she turns to look back out onto the wilds.
You sigh. "Unfortunately." You watch her, lost in thought, thinking she looks even more beautiful in the moonlight. Whatever this is that you're feeling is getting out of hand far too fast.
Even though it's the last thing you want to do, you have to leave her before you do something you'll regret. "I need to get back to the Warden camp and prepare, and you should go meet Duncan if you're ready."
For the second time, she almost smiles at you. "Goodnight, Alistair."
Yes, you are definitely in trouble.
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