He was single minded, but the doubts creeped into his mind regardless. He would never again see his brother, his friend, or his colleagues. Even those that he had disliked he had eventually grown to respect.
And now he was leaving them all again.
But for what? All that he had loved in Berlin were now gone: Alfons Heiderich, Noah... Why does he have to leave everything behind?
Almost as soon as he asked this question, he answered it again. The Gate needed to be closed for good, and he was the only alchemist with the power. That's why he carefully finished his preperations, resigned to his fate.
He felt the familiar, beautiful surge of energy through his body as he began to pass through the Gate, a pang of regret as he realised this would be the last time he would feel so powerful. No going back now, he whispered, as the remains of the airship floated through.
Edward stumbled out of the utterly destroyed ship, now in Berlin, barely noticing the guns aimed at his head, Noah on the ground holding Alfons's corpse. He sat down next to her, and stroked his friend's lifeless arm, a sob held barely at bay in his throat. His good friend, mimicing his brother almost identically in looks was dead, and his brother may as well be. No. Don't think like that. Al is alive. You kept your promise to him. He's alive and happy. That's all that matters.
"Edward...?" Noah whispered. He sighed and brough his gaze up to meet his, the shadow of a smile on his lips.
Alfons Heiderich's funeral was a large one, graced with both German and gypsy tradition. He would have wanted it this way.
Edward appeared to everyone to be fine, although inside he was still heartbroken. In the time since returning, he had allowed his friend's German counterparts to envelop him in their lives. He became uncle to Mae's and Gracia's daughter after they had wed, and confidant to Noah. He continued his work in science, although more out of habit than in hope of returning to Amestris. The Gate was gone, there was no real way for him to pass through again. He would live and die in this world. The only comfort was that he had fulfilled his promise to his brother, and that kept him going. It gave him the drive to work hard in this world, to try to change for the better as he had tried in Amestris. He worked on people friendly science, avoiding at all costs anything that could be used in war. He even managed to win a Nobel Peace Prize for his research into penicillin.
With his fame and fortune he moved himself and Noah to an English city called Sheffield. Noah travelled all over the country while Edward quietly funded her, using the time he was on his own to study without interruption.
One morning, he was sitting out in the outskirts of the city, clearing his lungs of the smog from the city and drawing the mountains. He had begun to keep a logbook of what he saw in this world, that was different to his own. He fancied that he could take it with him when he found a way home so he could show Al and Winry all the strange things he saw. Even something as normal as the Penines seemed so different to the ones he knew in Amestris. He turned to dip his paint brush in some water, when he noticed someone watching him. He jumped and knocked his water jar over, spilling the contents over his log book.
The someone, a small dark haired girl, giggled and disappeared. Edward sighed in minor annoyance and began shaking out his journal, watching the ink turn the once clear water purple, streaking down the page causing irreparable damage to his drawings. Tucking it away in his bag, he packed his things and stood, his backside aching from sitting on the floor for so long.
"Hey Mister!" Said a sweet voice behind him.
Edward turned and smiled at the child, his annoyance temporarily forgotten. "Hello." He glanced around. "Where are your parents?"
"You have a funny voice, Mister!" She shrieked happily, and darted off towards a cottage Edward had spotted about a half mile down the old road. A woman was there, hanging some white sheets on the washing line. The girl ran up to her and tugged on her dress, pointing in Edwards direction. Edward offered a wave, but the woman simply grabbed her child's hand and pulled her inside the cottage, slamming the door shut behind her.
The next morning, Edward brought a bunch of flowers to the woman's home, to apologise for intruding. When he knocked, the house seemed empty, so he placed the flowers, along with a short letter on the window sill.
The phone rang that evening. He answered it, expecting it to be Maes from Germany - He remembered that Maes daughter, his neice, would be turning 6 soon and he had promised to return to Germany for the party.
"Hallo Maes-" He began.
"Mr Elric?" Said an English women's voice.
"Ah I'm sorry, I thought it would be someone else. Yes, this is Mr Elric, can I help you?"
"Er, I'm Doreen, you left me a letter this morning?"
Edward vaguely remembering leaving his number on the letter. "Nice to finally speak to you! I'm Ed. Listen, I'm sorry about the other day..."
"My husband has pnumonia. I read about you, your work with anti biotics. Will you help me please?" Her voice was desperate.
"I, er, I'm not a doctor, really-"
"You're the only person that can help, please?" Edward sighed and looked over at his shelf, his experimental penicillin wrapped up in a wooden box. He hadn't dared use it on a human subject yet. It was modified, similar in design to the medicines of Amestris. Whether it would work on Earth, he was unsure. But this man could die without his intervention.
"Ok, I'll be there within the hour. Make sure he drinks plenty of clean water in the meantime."
"Thank you, Mr Elric, Sir!" He packed the medicine in his bag, where his journal still rested, his notes blurred but still readable - the comparisons between his world and this. At the end of the day, he thought to himself as he left, Amestris medicine is still medicine.
Edward carefully nursed Doreen's husband that night, injecting him with the medicine and keeping a close eye on his breathing and temperature. He learned that the husband, Erich, was a German immigrant, and a miner, and they relied on his wage to survive, but with his pnumonia he hasn't been able to work. Not only that, but they had not been able to find a doctor who would treat him, due to his German heritage. Edward felt a kinship to this man, living in a strange land and not feeling truly at home.
"Mr Elric?" Doreen said, as Edward listened to Erich's heart.
"Please, call me Ed." He said with a smile.
"Ed... Forgive me, but in your diary, you write about a strange land, Amestris. Where is that?"
He spun round to see the woman holding his journal. She looked apologetic, but also curious. This strange man, with his strange musings and beautiful drawings, who was he?
"Ah..." He regained his composure and smiled cheekily. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."
"I tell storys like the ones you write in here to Emily at bed time. Stories of magic, and good overcoming evil." Doreen kept her gaze lowered at the leather bound journal in her hands while Edward listened. "You must have some stories to tell. I hear you're well travelled."
You could say that again, he thought. Edward began telling her a story, about two brothers who did their best to help people, but were eventually seperated. They tried very hard to see each other again, but they weren't allowed, the gate between them was locked tight.
"Will they ever see each other again?"
He hesitated but said "No." He went back to the sick man, wiping Erich's feverish forehead. "I'm stuck here."
"But you can go back to Germany any day, surely."
"Al is not in Germany. Amestris is..." He stood and walked to the cottage window to look out as dawn broke. "Its another world. It's my world."
"I see." She whispered, although she did not.
"Is it in the sky?" Asked a sleepy voice; Emily, the young girl had awoken and stood quietly at the door while she listened to Edward's story.
He approached her and stroked her hair. "Yes, it's in the sky and far away. And thats why I can't see my brother again." Emily looked sad. "But don't worry, I know Alphonse is thinking about me as much as I think about him. Maybe one day we'll find a way." Ed pushed the thoughts about his brother to the back of his mind to concentrate on Erich, while Doreen left to take care of Emily, leaving the subject alone.