Title: Future Plans
Author: upsidedownbutterfly
Summary: "Where do we go from here?" Jarrod/Camille set between Dai Shi's defeat and the epilogue.
He finds her standing alone in the corner of the single large room that dominates the loft above Jungle Karma Pizza. It's dark – and Jarrod doesn't know where to find the light switch – but the moon is glowing just bright enough through the skylights to illuminate her silhouette. She's standing with her head bowed and back to door, and as he moves closer, Jarrod can just make out her arms wrapped tightly around her midsection.
She doesn't move as he approaches, nor does she speak, and at first Jarrod isn't sure she's even heard him arrive. She must have though, because she doesn't startle when he offers her a penny for her thoughts.
She doesn't answer either, at least not right away, and Jarrod lets himself lapse into silence as well. In the quiet of the loft, Jarrod can just make out the sounds of the party still going on downstairs. It's a victory party – RJ and Fran's idea, of course – and Jarrod and Camille had both been invited to their intense and mutual surprise. Neither of them can still quite believe how open and welcoming and forgiving the rangers have been.
Despite that, Camille had been tense from the moment they arrived, clutching his hand desperately beneath the table, only letting go in order to excuse herself at the first opportunity. When twenty minutes passed without her return, Lily had tapped Jarrod on the shoulder and hinted unsubtly that he should probably go find her.
"Where do we go from here?" Her voice breaks the silence of the loft at last. She sounds strained, desperate even, which is so unlike her that it makes Jarrod's heart ache.
"You heard RJ," he says, dropping his voice to match her near-whisper. "They're willing to let us attend the Pai Zhua school. To start over – at least for me – as cubs." He reaches out to her as he speaks and lets his hand settle gently on her shoulder. Her muscles are tight and tense beneath his fingers, and though she doesn't actually relax at his touch, it does seem to reach something within her, because she turns to him then. "And that's what you want?" she asks, looking up at him with features painted by shadows.
Jarrod nods. "It is," he tells her and is surprised to realize exactly how true that is. After all the many mistakes he's made, an opportunity to really, truly start over is more than Jarrod thought he could ever ask for – and he's finding himself fiercely grateful to be given the chance.
Camille however just lets out a tiny sigh and turns away. "But it's not what you want," he guesses.
She's quiet again for a long time, and Jarrod lets his hand slide from her shoulder to the back of her neck, fingers rubbing little circles against the bare skin they find there, willing her to relax. Finally Camille speaks. "I don't know what I want," she says, and she sounds so lost that Jarrod wants to cry.
With a shake of her head, she steps away from him – not far, but just beyond his reach. Jarrod lets his arm falls to his side, already missing the contact and yearning to reach out to her again. "It's different for me, you know," she says, pivoting about to face him with sudden intensity. "You were Pai Zhua. I wasn't. I've never been one of them. What if…" She trails off, and the intensity evaporates in a rush, leaving her looking forlorn as she finishes, "What if I don't fit in there?"
"Then we leave," he says without hesitation, which earns him a startled expression from Camille. Jarrod ignores it in favor of stepping forward and taking her hands in his. "How about we do this," he continues, the idea forming in his mind as he speaks. "We'll go, we'll try it, and if you don't like, we'll leave."
She shakes her head lightly at that, looking even more confused than she had a moment earlier. "But you just said you wanted to stay."
Jarrod nods. "I did. I do," he agrees. "Being Pai Zhua again is important to me." She turns her head slightly as he speaks, no longer meeting his eyes, so Jarrod steps forwards, letting go of her left hand to bring his right up to rest against her cheek. Gently, he guides her gaze back to his. "But you are more important to me. I don't know where my life is going either, Camille, but I do know that whatever path it takes, I want you beside me." His words are quiet but fierce as he wills her to believe them.
She doesn't, he can tell. Silence settles once again on the loft as Camille stares at him with eyes wide and mouth half-open, and Jarrod can read disbelief in every shadow on her face. She's spent ten thousand years being made to believe she was unworthy of love; Jarrod would be a fool to think he could undo that in only a few days. Still there's nothing more he would like to do, to make her understand how completely he loves her and how deserving she is of that love regardless of what she's done in the past.
So he kisses her. It's a sudden movement on his part, reflective of a sudden decision. Not that he hasn't thought about kissing her before, because he has – often – only the time had never been right; they'd been too busy fighting for their lives or his sanity. And maybe the time isn't right now either, but she's standing here in front of him safe and achingly beautiful and he's so in love with her, and that's really all that matters to him in this moment.
She goes still at the first touch of his mouth against hers, but it lasts only an instant before she's kissing him back. It's tentative, almost hesitant, and filled with more promise than passion, but it still just might be the most incredible feeling Jarrod's ever experienced in his life.
I love you, he thinks desperately as he pulls away, but he bites his tongue. He's given her enough to process already tonight. They'll be time enough for the words later. Still, when she looks up at him with eyes shining with wonder, the words threaten to tumble out unbidden anyway.
Then someone is turning on the light, and Lily' voice is exclaiming, "There you two are!" He and Camille blink at each other, blinded by the sudden brightness, as Lily continues exuberantly, "We were missing you downstairs, you know. Casey dared RJ to see how many slices of pizza he can eat standing on his head. He's up to fourteen and…" She trails off. "I'm interrupting something, aren't I?" Jarrod's back is still to her, but she sounds sheepish.
Jarrod smiles at Camille, who is blushing just barely at the tips of her ears, and turns to face Lily. "We were just discussing plans. For our future," he tells the erstwhile yellow ranger.
"Oh?" Lily replies, pursing her lips. "And did you come up with anything?"
Jarrod looks to Camille, because he's made his proposal but it's still her choice and he'll follow her wherever she chooses to go. She smiles up at him, and it's not the world's most brilliant grin but it is comfortable and genuine. She looks more at ease now than she had been when he found her standing her alone in the dark – more at ease than she has been since they fled Dai Shi's service – and when she reaches out to take his hand, her grip is light, not the anxious clutch of earlier.
"Yes," Camille answers for them, and though she's ostensibly addressing Lily, her eyes never leave Jarrod's. "Yes, I think we have."
Jarrod wants to kiss her all over again. Instead he settles for squeezing her hand and returning her smile and is rewarded by watching hers brighten.
"Good," Lily laughs. "Now come back to the party!" She beckons them enthusiastically towards the stairs, and together Jarrod and Camille make their way back to their new friends hand in hand.