Level score again. Light followed L into his apartment while undergoing their tennis match in his head over and over. This had been their 56th try. Still, none of them had managed to defeat the other.
"You want to shower first, Yagami-kun?"
"Oh. No, you go ahead. It's your apartment, after all."
L cast him a questioning glance over the shoulder and Light smiled back reassuringly. The black haired boy never seemed to really understand how politeness worked. He was drenched in sweat, and his white tennis shirt, which was actually the exact same as his usual white T-shirt, clung to his thin body. How he could create such force in his chops with that kind of physique was somewhat of a mystery to Light. Not to mention that he ate nothing except candy before their game. Now he pulled the T-shirt over his head as they were still standing in the hall and dropped the cloth on the floor. Next he undid the cord on his too big tennis shorts so that they fell to his feet with a soft thud. He stepped out of them and pulled his socks off, standing only in boxers, seemingly unembarrassed by Light's presence. Sure, they had done things that went outside the boundaries of friendship, such as kissing and some petting. It had all happened naturally as they started working more and more together and it was hard to tell who had actually made the first move. But they still hadn't gone all the way, hadn't even talked about doing it, and Light had never before seen this much of the other male's pale skin all at once.
"I'll go first then", L declared without turning around.
The comment was quite superfluous since he had already taken almost all of his clothes of, but Light didn't think his archenemy actually realized that. He looked at the boy's slender, unprotected back and his slim hips, covered only by the ice-cream-patterned underwear. Seeing him like this it was hard to believe he was actually a genius detective and possibly one of the most intelligent beings on the planet. He was just too vulnerable. Too much of a temptation. A sudden idea struck Light, with such force that for a brief moment he lost the face of Light Yagami, the police officer's son and L's best friend and became the merciless serial killer Kira. His handsome face split in a terrifying grin and his eyes glowed with excitement. Then he forced himself to return to being the bright but regular student again, changing back into his usual role as natural as a snake molts. Unconscious of what had been going on behind his back, L had just started walking towards the shower when Light reached out and grabbed his hips, making him stumble backwards until his bottom collided with Light's crotch. He recovered his balance and shook his head reproachfully.
"I can't believe you're getting hard just by watching me change. You're an animal, Yagami-kun."
Light chuckled softly and wrapped his arms around the black haired boy's slender torso, pulling him even closer. He bent his head forward over L's shoulder so that when he spoke in a calm, amused voice, his lips actually brushed over his so called friend's ear.
"Yes, you can. Actually you expected this from me, right?"
His right hand began to move slowly downwards over L's flat stomach until it reached the edge of his boxers. His fingers slipped inside and then withdrew again, playing with the hem as he continued his reasoning.
"After all, you're almost as hard as I am. Did it really turn you on so much to know I was getting hard while watching you?"
He put an urgent question-mark after the query by nibbling not very tenderly on his L's earlobe. The boy gave up a small cry of surprise and turned his head impressively many degrees, reminding more of an owl than a human, to look at the man behind him.
"So clever, Yagami-kun!" he said, with a sincerity that was almost mockingly honest. "You sure you're not Kira?"
Light's eyes darkened. Without another word, he shifted his embrace around the other man and lifted him up in the air. L gasped, but the sound only made Light even more annoyed than before. His dear friend had known this would happen. Actually, he had probably planned everything that was happening up until now in detail, so what use was there to play this silly little theatre? Light smirked and started walking towards the bedroom next door while carrying his burden, who was strangely light as in view to the sweets he was constantly eating. Well, he was well aware of how much the detective liked to play and how good he was at it. Had L wanted it, he could surely have been a star in Hollywood. But was he as good at keeping his calm when playing adult games? Light lifted one foot to kick the door to the bedroom open and earned himself a wordless protest from the boy in his arms. As if he cared. Light could feel L's erection pressing against his T-shirt through the boxers.
"But Yagami-kun, I wanted to take a show- whoa!"
L's reproving commentary was interrupted by a sudden exclamation when he was thrown down onto the messy sheets. Light immediately lowered himself over him, giving him no time to sit up or recover. L never ever made his bed, an old-fashioned history with metal posts on each side of the ends, and as much as it irritated his friend normally, it just added to Light's excitement right now. His eyes scanned the creases and wrinkles, searching for shadows of where L's long toes could have dug into the sheets in the way they always did when he tried to contain his pleasure as they were kissing. If he found them now, they would be evidence that L had masturbated this very morning.
"Seriously, Yagami-kun, I'm all sweaty and would really like to shower…"
"Oh, really?"
Light lifted one questioning eyebrow and the fingers on his left hand trailed over an oblong hollow in the sheets only some inches from where L's naked feet were right now. For anybody else the hollow wouldn't have looked particularly different from the numerous others but as Light locked his friend's gaze real surprise flickered in the dark eyes, if so only for a moment, and his cheeks reddened slightly. But he didn't look away.
"Really", L said, but his tone of voice was wondrous rather than confirmative.
Light leaned closer to him, placing one knee on each side of his naked legs, and his fingers entwined with the ones of his beloved friend, pressing the back of his hands down beside the spiky black hair that spread out over the pillow. He inclined his head the last few inches that kept them apart and their lips brushed against each other. Though the sensation made both of them shiver, none closed his eyes. Not for one second breaking eye contact, Light opened his mouth slightly and with the very tip of his tongue traced the contours of L's lips. When he was done they were wet with his saliva and trembling with yearning. Light smiled. For once L was quiet. He rewarded his friend with a real kiss, exploring his sensitive mouth with a curious tongue that parted the black haired boy's lips from each other with a low moan. The rougher his kisses became, the more his mouth opened up, not able to resist the pleasure. When Light finally withdrew, they were both gasping for air.
"You're so good at this, Yagami-kun", L remarked while licking his wet lips. "And you taste almost as good as sweets."
"Thanks, but you're too kind", Light said sarcastically, in a display of the typical Japanese modesty that L seemed to be completely unaware of. "But I'm not Yagami-kun."
L's tongue froze halfway over his upper lip and his dark eyes widened. Light repressed a smile and lowered his head, burying his face in the pale neck of his friend. He kissed it tenderly and could feel L's pulse increase against his lips.
"I'm Kira", he mumbled.
His voice was so quiet, that for a moment he doubted L had heard him. But then his pulse suddenly doubled and his breath fastened visibly. The corners of Light's mouth twitched in enjoyment. He started planting wet kisses all over L's neck and chin. The black haired boy moaned and turned his head to the side, giving Light even better access to his sensitive skin, asking to be devoured. Light tugged on his earlobe, biting hard and then licking tenderly and as he did so he heard a soft rustle from beneath, the sound of L digging his toes into the sheets.
"It really turns you on, doesn't it?" he whispered. "Pretending I'm Kira, imagining being so vulnerable in the presence of the serial killer who have deceived you so many times."
"Yagami-kun, you…"
"No."
Light's voice mirrored the darkness in his eyes as he spoke. He let go of L's right hand and forced his fingers violently inside his mouth, muffling whatever his friend had been about to say.
"Not Light-kun", he corrected grimly. "Kira."
He removed his fingers, wet from saliva, and gripped L's chin, forcing him to turn his head and face him.
"Say it."
L's wet eyelashes blinked a couple of times and his tongue swept nervously forth and back over his lips.
"Kira", he whispered.
Light smiled.
"Good boy."
He rewarded his friend with another kiss. As their tongues entwined, L began pulling in his T-shirt. Light laughed softly inside his mouth at the eagerness and helped him get it off, never interrupting their furious make out. But when L's hand reached out to pull at his shorts, Light immediately seized it with one of his own, while making a wide movement with the other. There was a metallic sound and the black haired boy gave up a small cry of surprise. He stared at his handcuffed hand and his eyes followed the dully gleaming chain, which had been thrown around one of the posts on the headboard of the bed, all the way back to the other handcuff in just enough time to see Light close the thing around his second wrist.
"Ya-", he changed his mind, "Kira, where did you find those?"
Light leaned back on his heels and knees, reviewing his tied up friend with satisfaction. The chain was long enough just for L's hands to rest on both sides of his head. His naked torso heaved, making the ribs appear and disappear under his pale skin, untouched by the sun. Untouched by anybody? The idea thrilled him.
"In the drawer, of course", he answered, making a lazy gesture towards the little table next to L's bed. "In the secret compartment you knew only I know about."
He laughed silently at the truth of that statement. The moment he had entered the room his eyes had discovered the modest furniture and he had known there was something in there, something he was supposed to use. L had wanted him to find the handcuffs, which he had immediately recognized as the ones they had once been connected with. But had he known just how much it would excite his friend to see him lying in front of him, tied up, unable to protect himself, almost as vulnerable as if his real name had been written in the front of his head? Probably. Light's eyes narrowed and he bent down to press his lips affectionately against L's hard nipples. He had to admit he loved how easily L read his mind. It made his heart pound harder than anything Misa had ever done. Really, life would be no game if it wasn't for the boy who now moaned and shuddered under his lips as his tongue rubbed against his sensitive skin. Light smiled hungrily, baring all of his teeth as he did so. Though L might have foreseen how much he would love to tie him up, he doubted he had fully comprehended the consequences of it.
"Ah… mnn…"
L arched with pleasure and Light responded to his movement by stroking one hand alongside his stomach, tearing at his skin with sharp nails in a way that made the black haired boy moan even louder, though it might have been in an expression of pain. His long fingers reached the hem of his boxers and he fondled L's erection through the thin fabric, tracing the bulging contours of it with teasing movements. His friend threw his head back and his hips pressed towards Light's palm.
"Ah!... More… K-Kira…"
The hesitating way he said the name he did not know truly belonged to his friend made Light harden even more than before. L gazed at him under heavy lids through long eyelashes, his lips slightly parted as he fought for air, his hands clenched into fists above his head, his hair a black mess on the pillow.
"You want more?"
Light made a walking movement with his fingers on his friend's underwear and L shut his eyes closed and shivered.
"M-more, Kira."
His cheeks reddened as he spoke and he refused to open his eyes.
"Hurry. It hurts. It hurts so much I can't bear it."
"I know", Light whispered, his eyes glowing. "I know."
He used both of his hands to roughly pull the annoying boxers down to L's ankles. The black haired boy gasped at the sensation when the cold air touched his finally released erection. Light reviewed it silently and stroked alongside it, from the base to the top and back again, with a tender finger. The simple touch made L cry out in pleasure and he finally opened his eyes, following the motions of Light's finger with hypnotized eyes. He really was rock hard and needed to be released soon. Light smiled.
"But I can't release you", he said, enjoying the pain his words inflicted in L's eyes. "Cause Kira doesn't want you to come. He wants something else first."
"What?" L panted, tears of frustration forming in the corners of his eyes. Had he any idea about how sexy he was, making such a suffering face? Maybe. "What does Kira want?"
Light chuckled at the question. Even if L was as bated and out of his mind as he seemed, which he to be honest doubted, he wouldn't forget such a thing.
"Yes, what does Kira want?" he repeated in a deep voice. "What is it that Kira yearns to have more than anything else in this world?"
L was silent for a moment and a flash of realization swept over his face together with something very similar to fear. That short moment when his innermost feelings were for once mirrored on his face was among the most arousing seconds in Light's life.
"Names", L whispered. "He wants my name."
"Yes, I want your name", Light confirmed.
"But if I give you my name, you will kill me."
"I will. But it will be quick, a heart attack, you won't even understand what's happening. If you on the other hand refuse I will turn these coming minutes, or even hours, or perhaps days into a burning nightmare you cannot escape. Not until you give me your name, that is."
"You believe you're that skilled?"
"I do."
Were they still playing theater? Light sure wasn't. But did L know that? And were they still talking about sex, or about life and death? For Light, it didn't really matter. What mattered was that he knew L better than anybody, better, maybe, than he did himself. Knew both his mind and body as if they were his own. He inclined his head and supported L's erection in his palm as he started licking it carefully.
"Ah… oh my god… ah…"
God? Light laughed at the irony in that. He put one finger in his mouth and then pressed it against L's entrance, starting to draw small, wet circles. The sound of rattling handcuffs filled the rooms, together with L's loud cries. He was adjusting and one of Light's fingers entered, slipping in and out of him, opening him up.
"Mng… K-Kira… more… harder…"
He sounded almost unconscious of what he was saying. Maybe this had for a long time been the detective's private little fantasy, to be caught and played by his enemy? Light lifted his head and realized L was digging his toes into the sheets in the exact same place where he had found the oblong hollows before. How cute. He smiled and crouched, removing his finger from L's entrance, which was visibly pulsating.
"You want more?" he whispered, sending a gust of hot air into his friend. "You'll have to give me your name first. Once you've done that, I'll release you."
Then he penetrated L with his tongue while caring for his erection with one hand. L's feet lifted into the air and he pulled even more violently in the chains.
"Ah… n-no… ah… so good… AH!"
Light smiled satisfactorily. The sudden cry told him he had found L's erogenous zone. He pressed his tongue carefully against the same spot and L's entire body shivered, vibrating with pleasure.
"Right there... n-no don't stop… harder… harder…"
He was really on his edge now. Light knew that it would be enough for him to brush the spot, or rub his thumb over his erection or even give him a kiss and he would come. But as much as he wanted to see that, he would have to wait.
"You about to come?" he pulled his tongue out of L's inside with a sucking sound as he asked the question which he already had the obvious answer to.
"Yeah… so close… it hurts…"
L's breath came in short, struggling blows, as if he were running out of air. However good an actor he was, this was for real. Light sat up and looked down on the tied up detective. What a sight. He felt like he was the ruler of the world. Leaning forward, he brushed away a tear from the black haired boy's blushing cheek. L shuddered at his touch and closed his eyes.
"Your name."
Light's voice was as soft as velvet and at the same time cold as ice. He cupped L's chin in his hand and moved closer until their faces were just a couple of inches away from each other.
"Look at me."
For once, L obeyed. He opened his black eyes wide and stared at Light, who was taken aback. He had not expected the intensity of the pain which burned in the darkness. Was it really that hurtful for him not to be able to come? To bring about such misery and suffering… it almost made Light come himself.
"Give me your name, and it will all be over."
He loved L. He could finally admit that to himself now. Nobody else made him experience such strong feelings of pleasure and accomplishment and satisfaction. He tried to imagine the sensation he would feel when killing him, but had to give up. It was of such grand proportions he couldn't even guess what it would be like. But in any case, he didn't need to guess. Because soon enough he would have the answer. L opened his mouth. His lips moved, as in ultra rapid, forming one precious syllable at a time. When he closed his mouth again, his before so intense eyes were completely emptied of all emotion, as if he had already died. Light nodded approvingly. He bent down the remaining few inches between them.
"I love you", he mumbled honestly and with those words gave L the kiss he so much needed.
He held him down, trapped beneath his lips, as he came. L's entire body twitched and shuddered and his seed gushed out of his long held erection, soaking Light's muscular stomach. All the while he cried wordlessly and although Light's mouth muffled the sound it echoed between the walls together with the furious rattle of the handcuffs. It was indeed as if he were being drained of all life. When he was finally done he fell back onto the bed, panting heavily from exhaustion. Light let go of his lips and kissed his temple tenderly before rising from the bed. He stretched his body and pressed his palms against his wet stomach.
"Now, we can both really use a shower!" he said and laughed loudly at the joke.
L didn't respond but lay still on the messy sheets, eyes closed. Light stroked some of his sweaty, black bangs out of his face. Then, as if hit by a sudden thought, he reached into the drawer and pulled out a little key. With careful motions he stuck it inside the keyholes of the handcuffs. They unlocked with the sound of a bone being broken into two.
"You seem tired", he commented. "I think I'll shower at home and leave you to sleep. Good night, my beloved friend."
Whistling to himself, and he almost never whistled, Light Yagami left the room and his friend lying unmoving on the bed, his wrists still resting in the unhooked handcuffs. There where fingerprints and various body fluids everywhere and had it been a crime scene, the police would have though the culprit a really stupid one, to leave such evidence behind. Nobody would ever have guessed that Kira had been there, the almost inhumanly intelligent serial killer not even the world's brightest detective had managed to catch. Which was, of course, exactly what Kira wanted them to believe.
~Epilogue~
When L awoke the first stars had just started to appear in the night sky. Sadly he couldn't see that, since his room had no windows. The black haired boy sat up in his bed and forced back an urge to vomit right on the sheets. His entire body hurt. Yet, when he checked himself, he had no visible wounds, or even love bites. There was a slight shadow of the handcuffs on his wrists but it would probably have faded away by the time the morning arrived. It was all as he had expected it to be. L wondered if Light had tried writing the name he had whispered into the Death Note yet. He shouldn't have, since the room bore heavy evidence of him being there and it would make him the obvious suspect if L was found dead in his bed. But then again, L could never be absolutely sure of what that man was thinking.
He knew he should go and shower. He was covered in sweat, sperm and saliva and Light's scent still rested on his skin. He felt filthy. But he just couldn't bring himself to move away from the smelly bed. Instead he pulled his knees close to his chest, as he so often did when thinking. Maybe, Light really wasn't Kira. Maybe he had really just gone home to shower and then sleep, wondering if this occurrence would affect their friendship, debating over how to relate to the obvious desire L felt for Kira, maybe even worrying about it. L wanted to believe so. This whole act had been a desperate try of his to prove that was the case. But it had given him nothing. He still wasn't sure whether Light was his friend or his enemy.
L buried his face in his knees. He needed to stay calm. This had been a risky operation. If Light was indeed Kira, he would sooner or later discover that the name L had given him was the wrong one. L would have to think about what that would result in. But right now, he just didn't have the power to. He had been unbelievably close to actually tell Light his real name. But when he had opened his eyes and met Light's auburn gaze, he had abandoned the idea. His shoulders shook at the memory. There had been no hint of real love in those eyes. All that Light did, all that it said, it had nothing to do with love. Even telling him he loved him had nothing to do with love, not the kind of love that meant any kind of future for the two of them anyway.
So he had lied. Lied and lived. Just as he would continue doing until he knew if Light was indeed Kira. But sometimes it was hard. So hard.
He would have to shower soon. And change the sheets and clean up the room and reflect over how the situation would develop hereafter. But for the time being he allowed himself to just sit still, clinging onto himself and thinking nothing as he cried violently over the man he had come to love almost as much as life itself. A man who, with greatest probability, in this very moment was doing his best to kill him.
Thank you so much for reading my work! *bows too deeply and ends up hitting head in floor* This was my first try writing angst AND my first try writing a DN-fanfic so please don't hate me and throw me into a burning pit of never ending hellish fire ! But except from that I'd really like to know what you thought about this fic! Write me a review (not mentioning burning pits and hellish fire) and I'll run around happily in circles for hours ^W^!
With love and a hurting forehead
Ms Twilight