THE MOON
I love the moon.
It may sound childish, but I've been obsessing about her luminous light since kindergarten.
Every night, I'll talk to her; telling her the day's events.
I even have a special name for her; Luna Moon.
I tell her a lot of things because… there's no one else to talk to.
Well. I've no friends, even though I'm in the 8th grade.
And I just moved here, to La Push.
I don't know a single soul here.
But still, Luna follows me everywhere, watching me from above.
It makes me feel safe somehow...
I sound pathetic, don't I?
"Okay, we are going to launch the SJ program today. Please refer to the list on the 8th grade notice board to check out your partners"
Half of the class groaned, while others chattered with excitement.
I groaned, for sure.
The SJ program is actually the Senior-Junior program, where the juniors will get a senior mentor for study purposes. It's only for two weeks.
I hope they forgot my existence in this school.
But I visited the board anyway, after school. There was a huge crowd of 8th graders packed in front of the notice board.
I scanned my name.
Oh, there it was. In blue ink as I just arrived. Great.
And my partner is….
Jacob Black. An 11th grader.
Never heard of him.
The after school session begins today, and as I racked my brain for excuses, a hand rested on my shoulder.
"Denise Norway?"
I turned round.
It was a guy, slightly tanned and ragged-looking (not that I care) but had a stunning, friendly smile plastered on to his face
Then, I remembered his hand on my shoulder.
It's not like I'm androphobic or something, but I felt awkward at the thought of a guy, touching me.
He caught me staring at his hand and he hurriedly pulled it back.
"Sorry, I'm Jacob Black," he smirked a little, embarrassed.
"Hi. Denise Norway," I muttered, not looking at his eyes
I hated eye-contact.
"Okay then. See ya this afternoon." he smiled and left.
"Sure." I mumbled, thinking of torturing days to come.
I'm always alone.
Of course Luna keeps me company, but people-wise, there's nobody but me.
Dad and Mom are at Hawaii, for a 5-year work and studies (Mom and Dad, respectively)
They just started last year and left me a lot of money just for my allowance.
We're not rich, but not that poor either.
Back to the topic, as I said, I'm always alone. I don't even want company.
So when I went to school that afternoon, I felt miserable.
And turns out Jacob Black really likes to talk.
A lot.
But he's okay, I guess. He treats me like I'm his little sister.
Whatever
But well, at least I'm a little bit socializing, ain't I?
" one," Jacob grinned, proud. "What's the formula for the….arc of a circle?"
I took a deep breath. "Theta over 360 time's 2 pie r."
"Congrats!" he squeezed my hands, as I looked away.
I think I'll never get used to his body contact thingy.
"Wanna drink?" he fumbled for his coin purse. "It's on me"
"Sure"
He went down the corridor, to the nearby vending machine. I rested my head on the table, bored.
Slowly, I started to sketch Luna in my maths book.
She looked shadowed, but full. I love it when she's full.
"What's that?"
I almost jumped out of my skin, covering my drawing.
"Aww...come on. What was it? A marble?" Jacob asked, good-naturedly.
I looked at my hands on my book.
"It's the moon."
He looked amused.
Great, now he'll think I'm a freak.
"The moon? I love her too. She's always so elegant, so beautiful…" he said, pulling a chair beside me.
I was shocked.
Jacob Black likes the moon too. He even called her 'she'.
"Really? Actually, I call her Luna."
Damn. I just told him my secret.
Jacob smiled widely, looking genuinely interested.
"Well, FYI, I call her 'Elle',"
"Sweet!" I laughed, at the irony of the name.
He looked startled. I frowned. "What's up?"
"That was the first time I heard you laugh."
I blushed.
"It's okay. You look lovely when you smile."
I blushed harder, not daring to look at his face.
"Oh, I forgot your drink." he handed me the tin, and accidentally, I touched his hand.
He looked normal, I tried too, but inside, my heart was pounding.
What's happening to me?
I sat at my windowsill, staring up at Luna.
"Luna? I whispered, "Do you know what it feels like to….fall in love?"
I bit my lip, an action I always do when I'm depressed.
I knew she couldn't answer.
"Luna, I think I'm in love." I announced, not certain to be happy or sad.
She stood up there, breathtakingly beautiful. But today she's still a crescent, almost half-full.
I felt something wet sliding down my cheek.
Surprisingly, it was a tear. I never cried.
I looked at Luna back, begging that she could answer me, for the first time.
"Luna, what should I do?"
But of course, there was no reply.
I became closer to Jacob. He's great fun, and I like him a lot.
Even though he didn't spend a lot of time with me, but when we got together, during SJ, it was really enjoyable.
But I'm not sure whether Jacob has a girlfriend or not.
But I don't think he does, or why would he act so friendly to me?
I hope so.
Okay, okay, I admit. I, Denise Norway, am in love with Jacob Black.
Time passes by so fast.
The SJ program is only three days left.
I want to confess to Jacob, but I don't have the courage to try.
Okay, on the last day then.
"Denise, come on! Today, we're studying Science!" Jacob called from across the hallway.
"Okay! I'll be there A.S.A.P!"I called back, smiling widely.
I'm really in love with him.
When I arrived at his class, there were two voices in there. I decided not to disturb, so I waited outside
"Goodbye Bella, see you later. Love you." I heard Jacob's voice, so I peeked inside.
There was Jacob; and a beautiful senior at his side.
Then, he kissed her cheek.
"Okay, Jake. See you too." She kissed him back.
She walked out, and smiled at me.
She probably doesn't even know me.
Then I realized, I was trembling.
Taking deep breaths, I entered the classroom.
Jacob was touching his cheek, his face slightly flushed.
"Who was that?" I asked, trying to keep my face controlled, but I was breaking inside.
He was a little startled hearing my voice; and put his hand down quickly.
"That?" he smiled. "That was Bella Swan, my friend."
I faked a laugh. "A friend? You like her, don't you?"
I prayed that he would say no, but he just blushed instead.
"I don't know…..But promise me, this is a secret, okay?" he whispered to me.
I just nodded.
I could not believe this.
I really can't.
I'm so stupid.
I should've checked before.
Thank God I didn't humiliate myself by confessing to Jacob and getting rejected.
Anyway, the last SJ program is today.
I don't feel sad, though.
In fact, I feel quite relieved.
But somehow, I have to know.
Has he ever liked me?
There's about 30 minutes to go before I say goodbye to Jacob completely.
And I can't even concentrate on his literature summary speech right now.
"Denise?" he nudged me. "Do you understand this?"
"Yeah." I said, absent-mindedly. "I guess so."
He closed the book and dragged his chair closer to mine.
"Hey, anything bothering you?" he asked, his hands closing over mine.
I blushed.
"No, I don't think so. Why?" I said casually, pulling my hands away to tuck a loose strand of my hair.
"Oh, okay. Anyway," he pinched my nose suddenly, "I'm gonna miss you, kiddo! Next year I'm gonna be free, but please e-mail me sometimes, Kay?"
His hand was still on my face and he already pulled me undeniably close to himself.
"Stop!!"
I jerked myself up, my chair falling backwards with a crash.
He looked surprised.
"Denise….are you okay?" he asked, concerned.
"No, I'm not! Why are you treating me like this? It's not like you like me that much, do you?" I burst.
He looked hurt." Of course I like you."
A spark of hope glittered within me.
"Besides, I treat everybody the same way."
Oh.
Yes, of course.
Of course he doesn't like me the way I like him.
"Sorry," I apologized, full of regret. "I'm just an idiot. Forget this, okay?"
He smiled, bending down to take my chair.
"Me too. Perhaps I made you too uncomfortable, that's all."
But when he looked back at me, his smile faltered.
I was crying.
I tried to wipe the tears away, but they kept coming back.
"Denise…." Jacob stood up.
"No, no. I'm fine, it's just…..I…."I sighed, "I think I'll go back home now. Sorry, Jacob."
I left, leaving him speechless.
Stupid me. Now he knows. I should never had came today.
I ruined everything.
Luna was full today.
I smiled at the irony.
A beautiful thing on an ugly day.
I sat on the windowsill and faced her.
"Luna," I croaked, as a result of heavy crying, "I'm sorry I left you."
I smiled again.
"I'll never leave you again. Never."
-END-Elle Luna