Disclaimer: Not mine.
The Perfect Costume
Groaning, Ranma got to his feet and dusted himself off. Akane's strength sure had increased over the few last weeks. How many bricks had he broken recently? Nine? Ranma shuddered. At least that explained the this time rather long distance he had crossed via mallet-airline and his still arching head.
He finally hopped out of the little crater, created by his impact, and looked around. And sighed in relief. Her strength may have improved, her aim, however, suffered lately. Only a few meters away from him was a fountain, in which Akane's blows usually sent him. Actually in any kind of cool liquids. From the canal, which was maybe even her most preferred landing spot for him, to every kind of pools and roof of bathhouses, which, of course, always were too weak to bear his landing force and, of course, had the only cold spring of the bathhouse located directly underneath, there was hardly anything that had not been violated for a change of gender against will. Sometimes, he even ended up in cold water when he already was female. By now he bet, he knew more fountains of Nerima and their locations than any other normal person, probably even more than a local guide.
At least, it would never become boring, since Akane never sent him somewhere twice. Except for the pond of the Tendo residence, that is. And creative she was. A few days ago, his destination had turned out to be a western styled party of some foreigns. Honestly, who would have expected the champagne to go off like that?
Ranma quickly put some distance between himself and his hated element -who knew? Maybe there would fall a in mid-fly off dropped bird from the sky and _accidentally_ splash him- and examined his surroundings for the first time.
Which were strange. Too strange actually. It seemed, he was not even in Nerima anymore. He winced at the thought as well as the new wave of pain in his head. Akane really got strong.
However, it was not too tragic. He was not Ryoga after all. To know the direction from where he had came from was enough to find the way back home. And by roof-hopping he would be there in no time.
Still, he decided against it. If the girl was pissed, then better let her alone for a while. He had once made the mistake by trying to apologize -no, not apologize, what does he have to apologize to her?- talk to her right after she had smacked him with that insurmountable mallet of hers. The only thing he had gained of it was another wet experience, a brand new lump, matching to the at that time already present one, and the insight to firstly letting her calm down and then speak to her, not the other way round.
And maybe he could even enjoy his involuntary stay in this unknown distinct. He beamed as he realized what a ward full of people, who did not know him meant, leaving the sun in the sky looking like a firefly next to a giant bonfire.
No bike wheel, smashing into his face, no deadly thrown mini-spatulas, no mallet strikes, no 'airen'-calls, no 'Ranchan'-calls, no maniacal laughers, no amazon glomps, no Kuno glomps, no enraged 'idiot'- or 'pervert'-yells, no 'Ran- okay, maybe a 'Ranma, prepare to die'-shout (you never know where this moron shows up next), no bad poetry, no--
However, there was one thing that always could set Ranma Saotome's mind off things -expect off fighting maybe- and it was currently written on a sign next to a great building on the other side of the street, some kind of hall. Actually, there were more words written on it, like T O D A Y : I N T E R N A T I O N A L C O S P L A Y C O N V E N T I O N in bold Latin letters along with the entering terms in Japanese signs. Ranma's attention was hopelessly drawn by two particular kanji, meaning 'food' and 'free'. Seconds later, a dust of cloud occupied the spot where Ranma had been an eye blink before. He crossed the room as quickly as he had crossed the road, aiming for the large buffet at the end of the room. Ignoring everyone around him, he obeyed his stomach growling and began stuffing his face. It wasn't Kasumi-made but why should he deny it if it was for free?
A light tap on his shoulder provided the by every of Ranma's bites more and more desperate growing food a short reprieve. Still with a remarkable amount in his mouth, Ranma turned around and found two girls sizing him up. He returned the favor and took a good look as well. The first thing that caught his eye were their obvious foreign looks, especially since they both were above average height of Japan. He didn't even need to bow his head in order to gaze into tho one girl's yellow eyes....Wait, yellow? They were, which was not the only odd thing. She also had unnatural pink-violet hair in a really extraordinary cut. The two strand on the sides of her head each formed a spiral with about one hand in diameter and somehow even stayed in place. A black, revealing outfit and a black witch hat completed her total bizarre look.
The other girl was less intriguing but still something to look at. She too, had pink hair, however a bit lighter in color and it was tied back by a metal bandanna with a sign on it, which should probably display a vortex. She wore a red dress with a white circle and underneath a black short and black shoes.
Ranma blinked. Then he swallowed his mouth contents along with the lump in his throat and blinked again.
The yellow-eyed girl broke the awkward silence: "I knew this pigtail was familiar." She grinned at him then her entire attitude changed. She caressed the outline of her chin and her expression grew thoughtful. "Hmm... I must say, not bad."
Ranma was surprised by her almost perfect Japanese. Perhaps it was because of Shampoo's influence, anyhow, he had expected the girl to speak rather broken or with a heavy accent. Yet, her choice of words proved that she was no native. A real Japanese would never address a stranger in such an rude way. Not that he actually minded. He took no stock in formalities himself.
The red-clad girl spoke up, as well with an unexpected flawless Japanese: "I agree. You really did a great job there." She nodded satisfied.
They seemed not to notice Ranma's bewilderment. "Wow, you even have his good look and the same built. That's what I call perfect imitation", the witch said while poking his chest.
"Hey, you are right, we got a real cutie here. If there would be shoot a real-life film of the series, you'd get the role, thats for sure."
"Huh?", was the only comment from Ranma's side.
Again the girls ignored the his confused stare as well as his grunt. "But in my opinion, it's rather risky to choose a main character, since there is a high probability someone other chose it as well, even if it's a not so popular manga. Or old in your case."
"Still, it's nice to see it converted so well", the girl with the bandanna threw in. "I can't believe how some of them even dare to show up nowadays. I mean just look at them. As if they intent to insult the creators at all cost. By the way, I think I even saw one, who had the same idea as yours-" She glanced over her shoulder which caused Ranma to became aware of his surroundings for the first time.
"A there he is. Hold a minute." With that the girl took off.
And he thought, he had left all weirdos back in Nerima.
The hall was crowded with Japaneses and foreigns, actually the foreigns appeared to hold the majority, all of them clad very strange. And 'very strange' not meaning weird traditional clothes or that kind of thing but rather 'very strange' like absolute crazy. The few school uniforms, which he had never seen before, were only the most harmless outfits. Some had enormous wings tied on their backs, some wore high technological armors, masking them up to unrecognizability, and few carried every sorts of giant weapons with them, which all would let Ukyo's battle spatula cry out in shame.
And then the hair colors. He had supposed his girl form and Shampoo had exotic colors, heck, the entire amazon clan was pretty creative. But it was nothing against what he was allowed to witness here. Silver was not rare and the girls were not the only ones with pink. Green, in any shades, blue, red, violet, teal -just select your favorite. All in all almost everyone in the room looked bizarre.
But why was he acting so surprised? After all, he had seen things that were clearly placed above a situation like this on the craziness scale. Perhaps because he hadn't expected to encounter something like this outside of Nerima. Then again, since when had the place where he was, any influence on the strange things that always seemed to happen around him?
"So..." the girl in front of him drawled to catch his attention again. "What do you think of mine?" She made a half turn as if she wanted him to get a good look at everything she had to offer.
Ranma was totally helpless. What does she expect him to say?
"Uh...I...well..."
"Does 'Papumpkin, pumpkin' ring any bells?" By his still blank expression, she threw her hands up. "Gee, are you honestly trying to tell me that you never have heard of 'Soul Eater'? You really are outdated, you know, especially for a native Okay, look, I'm Blair, a cat with magical powers, which was mistaken for a witch by its first appearance."
One word made the rest of the sentence meaningless to Ranma and caused him to flinch. "C-c-cat?"
"Yes. Look, I even thought of every detail." Whit that, she removed her odd shaped hat and revealed two cat ears.
Ranma couldn't help but jerk away. If she would start meowing now too, then he was out of here.
She only chuckled at his exaggerated reaction. "You really do play your role good. I completely forgot about that fear of cats of yours."
How the hell did she know about this? Was he that obvious?
"Verdammt!"
The yell caused both, Ranma and this Blair, to turn their heads towards its source. Even if it had not been Japanese, he still recognized it as a curse by the rudeness. Another foreign, this time male, stepped out of the crowd with a half hostile, half furious glare directed at Ranma. He probably was a little bit younger than him and wore...well, actually exactly the same he was wearing right now. His favorite red shirt with white selves, a black belt and black kung fu slippers and pants. This guy even had the same hairstyle as him.
The doppelganger approached them, still scolding, however, this time in Japanese, though with a heavier accent then the two girls had had: "And I thought, I would be unique today."
"What are you talking about?" Ranma was finally able to form his first real sentence since his arrival. "Why are you looking like me?"
Thus the age disadvantage, the other boy proved his superiority in height by position himself in front of Ranma and looking down at him. Ranma slightly tensed up under the hostile attitude.
"I should ask _you_ the question instead. Why are _you_ looking like _me_? I was here first, you can't just come here and steal my idea." The pseudo-Ranma glared at him angrily and snorted. "And by the way, you've done it all wrong. You're not tall enough, your pigtail is too long and you don't seem to mind the state in which your clothes are." He snidely pointed at Ranma's eroded pants and some still present dust stains. Ranma scowled at the truth in the words. In comparison to every one else's clean and neat clothes, Ranma appeared like a drowned animal in his own worn out ones. Still, who was this guy to be allowed to tell him how he had to look like?
"And on top of that...", the other boy went on "your eyes are way too grey. They are supposed to be greyish-blue, not grey-blue."
Just as Ranma was about to give this jerk a piece of his mind, a new girl, that arrived along with the pink-haired from before, literally saved the foreign boy's ass. Unconscious of course. She reached for the enraged boy's hand and began patting it in a comforting manner. "Now, now, bro", she chirped, "Just admit that you are jealous. He's way better than you."
Ranma blinked confused. Apart from her facial features, she as well looked like him. Or rather like his girl form. Same hairstyle and all. The only difference was the short-sleeved shirt she wore instead of the one the two boys had on. She, too, was younger, but, to his frustration, even a little bit taller than him right now.
The boys response consisted of crossing his arms defensively over his chest and throwing his head to one side with a hurt expression. "Feh, he's better my ass."
Ranma began tugging his pigtail. It always helped him to sort out his thoughts. If these two were trying to imitate him, then they did a pretty poor job. Especially the guy. He may be dressed like him, however, that was actually the only similarity. He had a very plump built and looked rather like that kind of guy, who sat in front of the TV all day and stuffed his face with potato chips. The girl was slimmer and more athletic than her brother but she didn't showed any knowledge of the art either. Furthermore, her breasts were not as big as Ranma's. He wasn't sure if he should be proud of it or not. He grimaced. Being more feminine than most normal girls was definitely not something to be proud of.
Suddenly, the foreign boy cracked a scornful grin by the attempt to shot Ranma another glare and declared in a mocking voice: "You are right. I surrender against that stupid expression of his, that is really very Ranma-like."
This guy really began to get on Ranma's nerves. Again the redhead came to her brother's rescue just as Ranma was about to disregard his attitude to never hit defenseless non-martial artist. While the two pink-haired girls apparently had lost interest in the three Ranmas and wandered off, she elbowed the him in the guts causing him to yelp of pain. "Be nice. We are just guests here." she then beamed at Ranma. "I apologize for him and his rudeness, it seems like he even begins to act like the one he embodies. Really, he takes the role playing a bit too serious and his friend he brought along is even worse." She shook her head then changed the subject out of blue. "By the way, did you come here alone or with some friends?"
"I..." Ranma scratched the back of his head. "...uh..I'm with no one-- I mean, I just saw that sign an'--" He huffed in annoyance at his own stuttering. "Heck, can you just tell me why you two are dre--"
"Look, there he is" she cut him off and sighed as another boy appeared. "Just if you speak of the devil.."
Ranma followed her gaze and ended up staring at a foreign Ryoga. "What the--?" But no one payed him any heed.
"Hey, next time you guys wait for me until I'm finished with wiping that arrogant grin off this pathetic Inuyasha's face back there. It took me ages to find you."
"Yep, a perfect Ryoga." The fake Ranma muttered and gave his 'rival' a dismissive wave. "Just come over here, we found another Ranma."
The pseudo-Ryoga's eyes fell on the Asian boy and he smirked, showing off his long fangs. "Wow, that's great and even a native. He can –no, wait, I mean 'Ranma, prepare to die!" With that he charged Ranma with his raised red umbrella.
After hearing the all too familiar shout, Ranma's body worked on autopilot and slipped into a ready battle stance, waiting for the attack to connect. While Ranma's face displayed his usual taunting countenance whenever Ryoga assaulted him, a very un-Ryoga-like grin was plastered on the other boy's face. Then 'Ryoga' tripped. And hit the ground face first.
Almost too stunned by his rival's unusual clumsy movements, Ranma nearly failed to notice the red umbrella that had flown from the boy's hand and sailed straight for his head. He tensed up to not be knocked of his feet by its weight and got ready to catch it out of midair. The moment he grabbed the handle, he released some of his strength and braced himself against the umbrella. And promptly fell forward as well.
In instant, Ranma was back on his feet and examined the weapon, by weighting in his hand. It looked rather cheap and was very light. Actually, it weighted next to nothing.
"And I thought, we would always win against Ryoga. That was a great double K.O.!" the tallest Ranma cheered.
Grunting, the Ryoga wannabe got to his feet and walked over to Ranma in order to take his weapon back. "Sorry about that. I really shouldn't have attached that much lead."
"But..but this thing doesn't even weight twenty kilo." Ranma stated to the surprise of everyone.
Ryoga stared at him in total disbelief. "Um...of course not?"
Ranma didn't respond. His eyes wandered around the room a second time, from one weird figure to the other and ended up on his counterfeited selfs and the strange Ryoga.
The girl was about to open her mouth and say something, but it was now Ranma's turn to cut her off. "Okay, that's it. Can now someone explain me what the hell is going on here? Why does everyone in here look so stupid and why do _you_ guys look like me and this one like pork-brain?"
He instantly was pierced by angry and disbelieving stares from all directions. Maybe he should have known better than insulting everyone in the room.
"Are you some kind of idiot or what?" The redhead asked bewildered. "We are cosplayers, just like yourself. This is a cosplay convention after all."
"Cosplay? I ain't wearing any costume!"
"Yeah, cos--wait, you are not?"
Ranma snorted. "Of course not. I wear them because I can fight in them, I'm martial artist after all." He then sighed defeated. "Never mind, whatever you crazy guys doing here, just do it, I actually don't even want to know. But please, keep me out of this all. I'm outta here."
Seeing that the direct way to the entrance was blocked by some for god knows which reason at him gaping people, he simply leaped over their heads and calmly walked out of the hall. Oblivious to the stares that accompanied his departure, he made his way back home.
And I thought Nerima is weird.
AN: I've never been to a cosplay convention, so for the ones who actually have been on one forgive my pathetic background knowledge. This was written out of sheer fun and for my own amusement. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. Have a nice day.