*A/N Well, I'm back; and this time I've written my first Songfic! Hooray! Anyway, this is set just after WWII ends, if you know what I mean. I wrote this while listening to Clarity by Zedd (It's such a good song), which also happens to be where I got the title and the lyrics I used in this fic. If you've never heard the song, you should definitely listen to it. It makes the story that much more powerful.*
Walk on through a red parade and refuse to make amends
Italy stood in the doorway of Germany's house; he stared at the German in horror, and tears were beginning to form in the corners of his eyes, glistening like diamonds. His heart was racing. How could Germany say that? He knew that the war was over. They were friends again, right?
Italy knew that Germany was upset at his betrayal, but he thought he realized by now that Italy still loved him. He had to do what was best for his people, and for the world. He knew that they had no chance of winning, and he didn't want to see Germany fall apart like Grandpa Rome and the Holy Roman Empire. They were too cocky, got too big and tore themselves apart. That's why he had to do it.
Despite everything, Germany still blames him. Italy shook his head, covering his mouth with his hand. Tears began to drip down his face. He stood there, paralyzed. Germany stared at him, regret and guilt evident on his face.
Why did I say that? I knew it was too soon. The wound is still fresh. He berated himself. He didn't really blame Italy. He knew that Italy loved him, and still does. But he cares deeply for the little Italian, and his betrayal hurt. It hurt a lot. Ignoring his feelings, he knew it was a low blow. Telling Italy that it was his fault that he lost the war, and even blaming their rocky relationship on him. He shouldn't have done that. It wasn't fair to his carefree lover.
It cuts deep through our ground and makes us forget all common sense
He was blinded by his pain. Blinded by his love for the young man in front of him. Blinded by his heart. Blinded by this beautiful nation. His heart led him astray.
"U-Uhh." Germany stammered, trying to think of a way to fix this. He couldn't lose Italy. Not again. They've had their fair share of fights before, both big and small, though they never seemed to be resolved. Although they were together, the atmosphere was always filled with tension. The differences between them were great, making it hard to clear the air. But despite all this, they were still in love. They loved each other deeply, with passion, and it hurt to see the other in agony.
Tears were falling freely down Italy's face. He didn't try to hide it anymore. He stuttered quietly, "I-I'm sorry. I'll g-go. You won't have to talk to me again." Germany stared at him in disbelief. Were they really…breaking up?
"I won't get in your way ever again; there will be no one to betray you. I p-promise." Italy wiped his eyes fervently, turning away from Germany.
Don't speak as I try to leave 'cause we both know what we'll choose
"Ita-!" Germany yelled, grabbing Italy's wrist as he tried to run through the doorway.
"Don't!" He screamed back, wrenching his arm out of Germany's grasp and opening the door. Cold rain hit his face, mixing with the tears that were already present. Germany stood stiffly in the hallway. He didn't know what to do; how to make him stay. They needed each other. At least, he thought they did.
If you pull, then I'll push too deep and I'll fall right back to you
Without a second glance, Italy darted out of the house in retreat. Huh. Retreat. He never thought he would have to use that word again. Especially not with Germany by his side. He couldn't look back, if he did, there was no way he was leaving.
He couldn't keep doing this. He needed to get away, to leave for a while. It stung to think that he wouldn't be waking up to the same stern face every morning. Instead, he would be left with negative space. The rain pelted down harder as Italy ran, his arms pumping furiously. He was desperate. What else could he do?
.oOo.
'Cause you are the piece of me I wish I didn't need
The moment Italy left him, Germany was frozen. Frozen in shock. Frozen in fear. Frozen in pain. He couldn't live without his precious Italian. He knew their relationship wasn't the best one. They had their ups and downs. But in the end, they loved each other. He couldn't just give up so easily. He had to get him back. He had to apologize. There must be some way. Without thinking, Germany rushed into the night. He was going to get Italy back.
Chasing relentlessly, still fight and I don't know why
Germany ran, faster than he'd ever run in his entire life. Nothing was more important to him than this young man. Feeling the cold rain wash over him, Germany let himself indulge in a few of his own tears. Was it even going to work? Would Italy even forgive him? Was it worth it?
Which way did he go? Germany was deep into the forest now, searching desperately. He had to find Italy. Where could he have gone? He searched through his mind, going through every memory he had of the sunny Italian. Only moments later, he realized. There was one place Italy would always go whenever he needed to think or calm down.
The apple tree.
That's where he always went. Germany ran faster, the wind and rain whipping at his face. He couldn't feel anything; he was numbed by the pain. Trees rushed past him in a blur as he ran. He had to get to Italy.
The minutes passed by like hours, time seemed to stretch agonizingly. After what felt like centuries, Germany ducked into an opening in the forest, searching for his lover. And there he was. Slumped up against the tree, sitting among the rotting apples on the ground. Tear tracks marred his face, shining in the moonlight. Germany couldn't tell what was tears and what was rain. They could have been the same at this point.
He sighed in relief. "Italy…" he murmured, reaching out to the other man desperately. Italy looked up as the silence was shattered. His face was one of confusion and sorrow.
Why did Germany come looking for me? Italy could not figure it out. I thought he wanted me to leave.
Suddenly, Germany grabbed his hand, pulling him into a tight hug. He pressed Italy's head against his chest tightly. His eyes glistened with the beginnings of tears.
"Italy, I'm so sorry."
If our love is tragedy, why are you my remedy?
Italy gripped the back of Germany's shirt, pulling him closer. Italy whimpered quietly. "I never meant to hurt you." Giving him another squeeze, Germany pushed him away, looking him in the eyes.
"I know, but you did, and it's hard to forgive." Germany's eyes bored into his, his face full of sorrow and pain. The floodgates broke loose. In a split second, tears began streaming down Italy's face, and Germany's soon after.
The rain showed no sign of stopping. They were drenched and chilled to the bone. But they stood there, staring at each other.
"But I still love you; nothing can change that." Germany looked away from the sobbing Italian, wiping his own tears away with the back of his hand.
"I love you too." A faint smile ghosted over his face. Germany was stunned. He didn't think there was much chance that their relationship could be repaired, but here they were, soaked by the downpour in the middle of the forest, confessing their love for the umpteenth time.
"Y-You do?" Germany asked him quietly, still unsure. Italy stared at him intently. His expressive amber eyes filled with determination.
"Of course I do. There's no way I couldn't. You mean too much to me." Italy clasped Germany's hand in his own.
"I love you."
That sparked something in Germany's heart. He grabbed Italy, pulling his face to meet his own, mashing their lips together.
The rain pounded down all around them, plastering Germany's hair to his forehead, and even wetting down Italy's curl. But they took no notice of it. They were too wrapped up in their own world to care.
Germany pulled Italy closer, running his fingers through Italy's wet hair. Italy begged for entrance, and Germany complied, allowing his mouth to be raided by his lover's tongue. Germany let out a small moan at the warmth flooding his mouth, kissing Italy back with just as much passion. After a few more moments of searing heat, they broke apart, panting heavily. A thin strand of saliva connected their swollen lips together. Italy wiped his face, looking up at Germany.
"Ti amo Luddy." He whispered, jumping into the German's strong arms. Germany patted the top of his head, his lips turned upward in a faint smile.
"Ja, ja. Ich liebe dich auch."
If our love's insanity, why are you my clarity?
*A/N I hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading, and please review
Translations:
Ti amo (Italian): I love you
Ich liebe dich auch (German): I love you too*
