a/n: um i pretty much don't even know why i wrote this, i was just really bored and in the mood to write so to get it out of my system i just came up with some vague idea and wrote this really, really quick. and it pretty much has like no point, i don't even know. i like how it started but i hate how it turned out? but whatever, hey read it or not or i don't know. i'm critical over my work. i think this sucks but maybe it doesn't, i dunno.

also yeah, didn't proof read, because when do i ever?

p.s. i threw a little bit of mickber in there (just a little!) because i mean just... how can i not? anyone who knows me, knows my absolutely love over anything else for them, so i literally try to incorporate them any way i can so just hush

title: i'll slap that mouth right off your face

pairing: eddie/patricia

pov: third

rating: probably t for language but i mean, i dunno.


Patricia doesn't mean to be so jealous. She really doesn't.

But she can't really help it.

It's not her fault that her eyes narrow into slits and that her mouth conforms its way into a snarl and that her hand twitches towards whatever liquid is nearest when she sees some girl getting too close to her boyfriend.

She knows, is completely and utterly aware, that Eddie loves her, and would never leave her for some other girl.

Joy always tells her, "Tricia, no way would he ever fancy someone else over you."

But that infinitesimal chartreuse demon still always finds its way up into her electric heart, into her quintessence.

And she hates it, god, she fucking loathes being so envious and green-eyed.

But it doesn't matter. She always will be, it's just her nature.

She's just waiting for the day that the disgusting, nauseating feeling overwhelms her to the point where she full on snaps.

/

It wasn't Nina this time, with her American drawl and sparkling smile enticing Eddie in his mere seconds of meeting her.

It wasn't Mara either, with wide eyes and an uncomfortable expression gracing her face as Eddie moved closer, closer, closer to her on the couch, sitting so close that body heat emitted between them.

It wasn't even KT, who Patricia was absolutely sure had a thing for Eddie, with the close nature of their friendship, and the way the two of them would always be touching, laughing, grinning at each other every second of the day.

No, it was just some new girl (not even an American!) who thought that she could strut into the distinguished boarding school with her hair perfectly coiffed and her jeans slicked onto her body so tight, they should have been taken off of the market for suffocation.

Her first day, Patricia and Joy stopped mid-conversation and watched her as she walked into the room, beaming at all of her new, oh so delightful classmates.

They watched as her eyes scanned the room, and stopped on a particular person. Patricia's person. That stupid slimeball that happened to be her boyfriend.

Patricia saw the ever so faint hint of a smirk as this girl strode down the aisle and stopped at a desk that was one behind and diagonal to the one Patricia was currently sitting on top of.

Patricia nearly growled when the girl extended her arm out at Eddie, saying, "Hi, uh, I'm Ruby. I was just wondering if perhaps I could sit next to you? It's just, I'm new, and I saw an empty chair by you, and you just seemed rather friendly..."

Eddie chuckled, and shook her hand. "I'm Eddie." Ruby looked surprised for just a second, hearing his very not British accent, but her smile never faltered. In fact, it just grew even wider. Eddie continued, "Wow, yeah, I know it's tough being the new kid, especially in this school."

Patricia had had enough of watching the sickening exchange - this girl shamelessly flirting with Eddie, complete with the whole twirling her hair around her finger and everything, while he just babbled on, completely oblivious as to what was really going on - and as she stood up to go give this prissy new girl a piece of her mind, Joy grabbed her arm.

"Patricia," she said, in a warning tone. The two exchanged a variety of looks, unspoken words passing easily and understandably between them. The silent conversation ended with a stand-off glaring contest, Patricia winning easily.

"Fine, go," Joy sighed. "Just no liquids!" she said, wagging a finger at Patricia seriously.

"I don't have any, I promise," Patricia said back, her hands up in surrender. She turned on her heel and walked slowly over to Eddie and Ruby.

As she approached, she heard Eddie saying, "And well, I'd love for you to sit next to me-"

Patricia jammed a hand down onto the desk and shoved her body between the pair where Eddie was sitting and Ruby was leaning over the desk. Ruby looked up at Patricia in surprise.

"What my boyfriend was about to say was that he'd totally love for you to sit next to him, but oh, sorry, look at that, seat's taken," Patricia said, interrupting and moving around Eddie to plop down into the seat next to him.

Hot anger flashed through Ruby's eyes and Patricia noticed, mostly because it was the same thing that so often she saw through her own two orbs.

"Oh, I see. Well, that's okay, I'll just find somewhere else to sit. Nice meeting you anyway Eddie. And you too, uh...?" Ruby said in a voice so sickly sweet that she could only be faking it.

"Patricia. Or your worst nightmare. You choose." Patricia smugly grinned at her, not once breaking the awkward, tenuous eye contact between them.

Ruby grimaced, looked down and said, "Hmph. Well, nice meeting you too then... Patricia," before sauntering away in search of another seat.

As soon as she was gone, Eddie turned to Patricia, a pointed look on his face. "Yacker."

"What?" she questioned, with an innocent expression.

"Do you have to scare away every new kid?" he said with a sigh.

"I so did not scare her away. I didn't even pour anything on her!" Patricia replied, dismissing his comments with a wave of her hand.

"You told her you were her worst nightmare," he shot back, an eyebrow raised.

"No, I told her I could be. It was just a fair warning. Where's the harm in that?"

"And why do you hate her already?" he asked.

"Because," Patricia mumbled and turned her head away from him in annoyance, ending their argument.

Eddie's face softened; he hated when Patricia was upset with him. He'd like to say that he's stronger than her and that he's the one that calls the shots in their relationship, but really, he turns into a pile of lovesick mush for Patricia, always caving into her first.

"Alright, I'm sorry Yacker. We don't have to talk about it anymore, okay?" he said, putting an arm around her shoulders, turning her towards him, and pulling her impossibly close.

Patricia nodded as she put her head on his chest and smiled into his sweater. She just inhaled the smell that was Eddie and let it intoxicate her.

She let all the rage and jealousy filled thoughts swirling around her brain like a swarm of bees float far away into nothingness.

As he stroked her hair and kissed the top of her head, she thought, We're okay, this is okay.

/

But this Ruby was a persistent little one.

She was that type of person who always got what she wanted, no matter the cost or what it took.

If she wanted Eddie, then my oh my, was she going to get him.

/

Patricia felt like she was a balloon, each day being filled with more and more hot air, expanding bigger, bigger, bigger and everyone knew that one day, the latex rubber was just going to pop, the pieces floating down, down, down, littering over anyone in their path.

She watched her doofus and this stupid new girl grow close as can be, the best of friends.

Patricia had never really had someone try to steal him away before.

Any time she was jealous of a girl, it was always for a stupid reason. Because she always knew in the back of her mind that really, Nina or Mara or KT or whoever, didn't actually like him and they would never actually have the audacity to swoop in right under her nose and take what was hers.

So when, for the first time ever, some fancy unfamiliar damsel really tried to, Patricia grew increasingly nervous and panicked as the days passed by in blurs and she realized that she couldn't do a thing about the entire situation.

At first, her friends just brushed off her alarm as just Patricia being well, Patricia.

But then, slowly, everyone at Anubis House caught on to this girl and her affection for the American boy. Everyone, that is, except for the boy himself.

He was still caught up in everything, so unaware.

He didn't quite realize that Ruby's smile had a sly undertone to it every time, or that dark lust pooled in her already tenebrous brown eyes and clouded them over, or that she bit her lip in attempt to look coquettish so much that the blood that seeped through seemed to have permanently stained them the same color as her namesake. He didn't grasp the fact that she clutched on to him a little too long during a hug, or that it wasn't just absentmindedness that was the cause of her twisting her curls around and around her skinny little boy snatching fingers, or that she literally giggled, high-pitched and all, at every little thing he said.

/

Once or twice, KT or Fabian or someone would bring it up to him, saying something along the lines of, "Hey, Eddie? Do you think that maybe Ruby... likes you...?"

Eddie would just roll his eyes, laugh and say, "What are you talking about? She just likes me as a friend. Did Patricia put you up to this? Because she has some absurd hatred for Ruby. I wish I knew why."

/

Patricia walked down the hallway at the end of the school day, and she saw Eddie and Ruby at Eddie's locker, their heads extremely close together, looking down at something on Ruby's phone and cracking up.

She frowned and made her way over to her own locker, which was four away from Eddie's, watching the pair the entire time, glowering. Once she got her books and put them in her bag, she slammed her locker door shut as hard as she could, causing the chatter and students around to halt completely, and Eddie and Ruby to snap their heads up at her. Eddie looked at her questioningly and Patricia gave him an icy stare in return before flashing a sarcastic closed-mouth smile and plodding away quickly with her furious heart pounding in her ears, shoving past anyone in her way.

She faintly heard Eddie's footsteps behind her, but she made it down the front steps of the school building and to the edge of the lawn before he caught up with her. He grabbed her arm, causing her to jerk back and spin around to face him.

"What?" she spit out harshly at him. It's not that she was mad at Eddie. Or, she didn't mean to be. She was just angry about the entire situation with Ruby and that Eddie was still hanging out with her, egging on the girl to keep flirting with him and trying to steal him away from Patricia, unbeknownst to him.

"Yacker, what's the matter?" he asked, his eyes entirely full of sincerity.

It made Patricia feel like shit, especially when she ripped her arm out of his grasp and snapped at him, "Nothing. God, just leave me alone."

"Is this - is this because of Ruby?" Eddie asked accusingly and knowingly. Patricia's lack of response while gazing glumly at her feet answered his question. "Seriously, what is your problem with her? She hasn't done anything to you!"

"Maybe if you weren't so stupid, you'd realize that she fucking likes you!" Patricia shrieked, hastily raising her head up to look at him.

"Ruby doesn't like me! Is it that hard for you to process that I can have friends that are girls that don't like me? Jesus, Patricia, you're fucking ridiculous," he retorted back at her, laughing acerbically at how ludicrous he thought the entire plight was.

The look Patricia gave Eddie in that moment was one that she had never mustered up within herself before; one so wrathful and chilling that it seemed as if the skeletons under the earth in the cemetery down the road were turning in discomfort in their graves and as if her eyes were going to combust into flames and reduce to nothing but ashes.

She laughed, completely hollow and bitter. "Oh, wow Eddie. Fuck you," she said, turning away from him coldly and trudging away through the grass towards Anubis House; her menacing glare and crossed arms before she did so being a clear invitation for him not to follow her.

/

That night, she didn't go downstairs for dinner. She felt absolutely sick to her stomach and like the entire world was closing in around her, getting ready to press a rag soaked in chloroform tightly against her mouth and nose until she breathed it in, in, in until everything went black.

The only thing that ran through her mind over and over was, Great job Patricia, now you just set everything up, just how Ruby wanted it. It's only a matter of time before you don't have the right to call him yours anymore.

As the tears started sliding down her face faster and faster, she laid down on her bed and sobbed into her pillow, the noise of her housemates at the dinner table just sounding like white static in her ears.

She didn't even register when Jerome walked into the room, panic in his eyes. If there was one thing people learned about Patricia in the years of knowing her, it was that she rarely cried, and only did so when something was very wrong. And Jerome had known Patricia for a long time and always, always had a soft spot for her in his heart. He wasn't always the big bad wolf people made him out to be.

"Trixie, what's the matter?" he said, rushing forward and sitting on her bed.

"Jerome?" Patricia croaked, sitting up and wiping her eyes quickly. "What are you doing in here, you slimeball?"

"Joy forgot her phone up here and begged me to get it for her," he said with a shrug. "Now, really, why are you crying?"

The concerned look on Jerome's face caused Patricia to break out into another round of hysterics, and Jerome quickly wrapped his arms around her, holding her head close into his shoulder and softly saying, "Shh, it's okay," over and over to her.

"I- I was so st- stupid and I yelled at Eddie and we got into a fight and now he probably h- hates me and he's g- gonna break up with me and he's gonna g- go out with Ru- Ru- Ruby!" she managed to blubber out with shaky breaths, still bawling into Jerome's shoulder, soaking his shirt with her tears.

"Trix, I'm sure Eddie's not going to break up with you." He sighed. "He loves you."

"N- not anymore!" she hiccuped.

"Alright, I'm gonna go find out what's going on, okay?" Jerome said, pulling back from Patricia and smoothing her hair down. He stood up and made his way out of the room, but he stopped at the doorway and turned around. "By the way, Patricia? Ruby has nothing on you, I promise." Then he sauntered out and downstairs in search of Eddie to reprimand him and hound him for information of what the hell he'd done to make Patricia Williamson cry like that.

/

A few hours later that night, as Patricia laid wrapped up in her comforter in the dark, all out of tears and wallowing in self pity, Eddie quietly entered her room and slipped under the covers on the side where her back was turned to him. He wrapped his arms around her, hooked his chin over her shoulder, and softly kissed her still wet cheek.

"I'm sorry Yacker," he whispered, sighing sadly.

"I thought you hated me," Patricia said back, barely audible.

"God, I could never. I love you more than anything," he breathed out, shaking his head vaguely.

"You're not going to break up with me?" Patricia asked, glancing up at him, confused.

Eddie soundlessly laughed into her skin. He was surprised that she'd even thought that. "What? Why would you ever think that? I'm never letting you go Yacker, you're stuck with me," he said, pulling her even closer.

Patricia snorted. "I guess that's alright."

Eddie leaned down and pressed his lips against hers tenderly. When they pulled away, Patricia just smiled and snuggled into him, his protective arms around her, and the both of them fell asleep in minutes.

/

Eddie and Ruby still hung out and Patricia still got jealous but she didn't let it show.

She just didn't want to lose Eddie, ever.

And even though he'd promised she was his and he was hers forever, she couldn't stop herself from counting down the days until Ruby would figure out a way to take him away.

But one day, Ruby made a huge mistake.

She and Eddie were sitting on a couch in the student lounge working on chemistry, while students milled about the room. The Anubis housemates were off to one corner near the entrance, all huddled around Amber and Mick, who were both back for a visit.

Amber put her hands up, silencing the group. "Okay, okay, so let me get this straight. So now, Joy and Jerome are dating?" she asked pointing at them. They nodded. "And Willow and Alfie?" They nodded too. "And Fabian and... Mara?" she finished, directing a glare at Fabian.

"Um, yeah," Fabian said, chuckling nervously.

"Did you hit your head and forget that Nina existed or something?" Amber growled.

"Ambs..." Mick said, raising an eyebrow at her. She rolled her eyes and Mick said to Fabian, "Sorry mate. But well, you know how she is."

"Why does no ever tell me anything now that I'm not here anymore? Hello, I must be informed of any and all relationship and love drama going on!" Amber said with a huff.

"Uh, you didn't tell us that you started dating Mick again," Joy said, laughing.

"Well I don't have to! I'm the love g-" Amber started, but stopped when her attention was captivated by Eddie and some girl she had never seen before sitting awfully close on a couch not too far from them. "Excuse me, but who is that?" she asked, pointing at them in disgust.

"Oh, that's Ruby Deveraux. She started here a few months ago. She's nice, I suppose, I don't really talk to her much. Eddie's really good friends with her though," Mara piped up.

"Did Patricia and Eddie break up or something?" Amber asked, a horrified look on her face.

"Uh, no," Joy replied, an uncomfortable look on her face.

"Then why is that girl all over Eddie? No one messes with Peddie," Amber said seriously, narrowing her eyes at Ruby as if that would just make her disappear.

"Oh my god, Amber, I thought I told you to never use that term ever again," Patricia, who had just walked in the room and over to the group at the end of Amber's statement, groaned, her face in her hands.

"Oh you just-" Amber started to say but stopped when a discernible gasp was heard collectively throughout the room. Every single head turned towards the couch, where Ruby had Eddie pinned against the arm of the couch and had her rose tainted lips pushed up against his.

"Oh my god," KT said at the same time that Joy said, "Oh, no," and Fabian said, "Oh this is so not good," and Willow said, "Well that's not very nice at all," and Mara gasped and Alfie and Mick's eyes were so wide they looked as if they might pop out and Jerome said, "No fucking way," and Amber said, "Oh... my... Beckham, how dare she."

The room was deadly silent and eyes started glancing at Patricia to see what she was going to do. People were practically trembling in fear. As the crowd of people parted to make a pathway for Patricia, Eddie managed to pry Ruby's clinging hands off of him and push away to the other side of the couch and as Patricia neared closer to them, everyone heard Eddie screech, "What the fuck?!"

Patricia stopped in front of the couch, expressionless. Her entire being was void of any emotion. Eddie stood up and gaped a her, a helpless look on his face. Ruby followed suit and stood up too, but gave Patricia a pompous smirk and a look that very much said: I win.

"What are you going to do, my worst nightmare? Pour some juice on me? Oh, I'm so scared," Ruby said nastily, with a terrible laugh.

Patrica pursed her lips and shook her head.

"Oh? Wow, look at that, the oh so very tough Patricia Williamson has no guts to actually do anything now that someoneactually stood up and did something that just hurt her so much," Ruby said, sarcastically clapping. "Whatever, I really doubt Eddie loves you anyway. How could he?"

Eddie's eyes flashed with rage at those words and he opened his mouth the say something but Patricia stopped him by putting a hand up and shaking her head. She took a few steps closer to Ruby until she was mere inches from her face.

Ruby raised an eyebrow. "Yes? Did you want to get up close and personal to study the lips that just made out with your old boyfriend?"

Patricia just smiled, and then raised her hand and smacked Ruby right across her mouth. Ruby stumbled a little in surprise, but before she could retaliate, Patricia sucker punched her hard in the middle of the face.

Blood gushed from Ruby's nose as she fell to the ground, crying.

Patricia stood over Ruby and spit at her, "Who doesn't have guts? You didn't deserve juice." Then she walked out of the room, everyone cheering (Amber exceptionally), and started just wandering aimlessly down the hallway, running her hand along the lockers.

Eddie ran out after her and slid to a halt in front of her. She stopped walking and looked up at him, waiting for him to speak.

"So, uh, I'm sorry," Eddie said, scratching his head. "I'm sorry I didn't believe you when you said she liked me and I'm sorry I didn't just take your feelings into consideration. Can you, um, can you forgive me?"

"I think so, doofus," Patricia said, looking up through long lashes.

Eddie broke out into a smile and it was infectious and soon enough Patricia was grinning like a madman as well. She went on her tiptoes and pulled his face close to her.

"The only lips that are allowed to touch yours are mine," she whispered before kissing him. He smiled into the kiss, fully in agreement.

They broke apart and Eddie intertwined his fingers with hers as they started walking down the corridor towards the doors that led outside.

"So Yacker, I guess me teaching you how to falcon punch really taught you well, huh?" Eddie said, his laughter ringing through the hallway, bouncing off of the walls and echoing. Patricia just laughed and laughed and laughed as their bodies became more and more distant figures from her classmates watching. They heard a squeal of glee from Amber and Patricia was pretty sure she heard her say something along the lines of "Go Peddie!" but she was too caught up in Eddie to even care.

Eddie pushed open the door and took off in a run across the lawn, pulling Patricia along with him. The sprinklers came on and they both just laughed, and stopped in the middle of it all, letting themselves get soaked.

"So, hey, wow, I must be pretty hot if all these girls you're always jealous of actually like me," Eddie said, attempting to keep a serious expression on his face.

"Oh shut up Kruegar. Don't get too full of yourself now that I decked someone for your very important love here," Patricia said rolling her eyes and chuckling.

Eddie got a look on his face and Patricia knew what was coming and she broke out into a run, trying not to slip and fall through all the water. Eddie caught up to her fast though, and he grabbed her tightly.

"Ahhh, noogies in the rain! Noogies in the rain!" Eddie yelled gleefully, rubbing his knuckles against the top of her sopping hair.

"I hate you so much, stop it right now!" Patricia laughed.

"Never!" Eddie shouted, and then picked her up and spun her around and around. "You love me," he said, putting her down.

"Eh, occasionally. Only on like Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays," she said back, scrunching up her face.

"Yeah right," Eddie chortled before pushing their wet mouths together. He pulled away for a second to say, "Aw, how cute Yacker, this is like a movie moment!"

"Oh my god, shut up," Patricia snorted while rolling her eyes, kissing him once again.