For Richard Castle, words are more important than life itself.
Words are something he meets every day, every second – in the newspaper, in the street, in every page of his diary, even on the carving of Alexis' heavy wood door, which also carved on his heart the very moment he ran his thumb through it. I Luv Daddy.
Words are more than just a train of alphabets. Words are powerful. Words are something that can make someone's life if you place them in the right order, which can destroy everything if you place them in the wrong order. Both ways, they can stay in your mind forever.
Words are guidance. Words lead you to the right way. Words are light. Words, even in its worst function to bring people down, still illuminate the darkness, the blindness.
Words are the only thing matters. Words are the only thing that constant to him.
Words lead him to her.
She loves his words; she loves every sweet thing he ever said. She remembers them, absorbs them, holds on to them. She remembers the way he says "I love you"; eyes big, glistening in tears. She never asks why ninety-percent of the time, he says it with tears. He just says it out of the blue. "Most of the times, it's because I feel so lucky to be able to say it to you. Other times, it's because I regret ever saying those words to another woman."
She loves the fact that she's not the only one enjoying his words. She loves knowing that somewhere out there, there's another nineteen-year-olds Kate Beckett seeking comfort on his books.
She loves the way he warns her if she does something that can hurt both of them. Sometimes it hurts, but he always says it with a low voice. He always tries to pick the right words, to never intimidate her or points her how wrong she was. Maybe in the first year of their relationship, but right now, it's never her fault or his fault. It's always their fault.
She loves how proud he is of her. She loves every compliment he says about her every time he meets his friend.
She loves him.
He's wrong.
Words aren't constant. At least not to him.
Even after two weeks of going back home, still not remembering a thing, he still can't write a word.
He stares at his blank page on his laptop, cursing at how literally blank it is. Cursing about the fact that his phone rings at the same time, and it's from Gina.
He forgets the last time he felt like he needs to cry. Like the world he's living is caving in, like he's the most clueless person walking on this earth. The unpleasant feeling rises when his eyes lands on the stack of his books. His. His books, his writing, his ideas, his word.
How did I write all of this?
Another heavy sigh falls from his lips. He needs something to make everything better. He needs something constant. He needs something, someone who won't leave. Who will be knocking at your door the very second you call them.
Kate.
"Castle?"
She's home early. He didn't go with her because he needs some space. He needed to find his solid-ground, and she understood. She still is. She believes in the magic of 'space'. She believes on how much it heals you when you really need it.
But she believes her intuition more.
And her gut says she has to go home to him.
She finds her in front of his laptop, hands shaking so bad, so bad that it scares her.
"Kate." He says her name. "Kate. Kate." He keeps saying her name, in a way that makes her heart breaks.
"I'm here, Castle." She wraps her arms around his neck from the back of his chair.
He turns around and gives her his most confident smile.
"Kate." He says it again, with relieve this time.
"Yes, Castle, it's me. I'm here."
He frames her face with his hands, thumbs exploring her face. She closes her eyes at the sensation, only opens them when she feels him placing a kiss on her forehead. "I found my solid ground."
For Richard Castle, Kate Beckett is more important than life itself.
With her, he can reach the stars. With her, the world is no longer beneath him. His world is a beautiful, amazing, steady place that is their relationship.
And words can't describe how strong they are standing at it.