Righty-o, this is a one-shot series where YOU, the reader - or whatever, you can even suggest an idea without reading these - can send in ideas for me to mess with the Masters of the Jade Palace. Or ask them questions. Or mess with my team. Or mess with someone else. I'm not that fussy.

Basically, yeah, leave a review or a PM to tell me any ideas you have, and I'll see what I can do. Generally I need to be able to do it, and I'm not extremely fond of provoking my own murder, but what the hell - just write in and see what happens.

For the first shenanigan I've come up with something, but I'm generally pretty lazy, so generally I'll look to whatever's been sent in. Enjoy.

Dimension: 384.2
Local time: 25/10/12 - 13:24

"So I can break anything I want, right?"

The rest of my team and most of the Masters were still out on missions, so Po, Tigress and Mantis had opted to show me around the Hall of Heroes. 01 was back at the Jade Palace too, but he'd gone off to do his own thing.

"No! You can't break anything, not even accidentally!"

"That didn't stop you before, Po." Mantis laughed.

"Yeah, right, real funny Mantis. I've learned from my mistakes."

"Is it wrong that I pride myself on my comedic genius?"

Po ignored the bug (in both senses) and continued onwards.

"Alright, next is the Sword of Heroes! Said to be so sharp, you can cut yourself just by looking a- Ow!"

Tigress smirked, "What was that about learning from your mistakes?"

I was sceptical about this sword, "I'm not buying this, just by looking at it..."

I took a few steps closer to the sword. On closer inspection... Closer inspection was completely useless. I continued looking at the sword, performed a few scans, trying to find something, anything, but I only got one bit of information from it.

"My shields are taking damage."

"What?" Po said.

"Never mind - logic is dead to me now, let's just carry on."

And so the tour continued, until we at last reached the point I'd been waiting for: the first shenanigan.

"Now," Po presented, "here we have the Invisible Trident of Destiny!"

"Invisible Trident, you say?"

"Yep. Invisible. You can't see it or something, can you?"

"No, that's fine. I was just thinking, if it's invisible, then you wouldn't be able to tell if someone were to... Let's say... Steal it, maybe."

Tigress caught on to what I was saying. She advanced on me, her tone threatening. "02?"

"What are you asking me for? I didn't do- there's not- no- youcan'tproveanything!"

"02," Po asked, "did you steal the Invisible Trident of Destiny?"

I held the suspense for a little moment...

"No, of course I didn't."

Mantis raised an eyebrow, or whatever it is he has. "O... K..."

"I might have hidden it though."

"WHAT?!" Tigress pretty much roared. I quickly brought up a dome shield around me.

"Shield! Shield! Don't hurt me!"

It was pretty typical that some of the Masters chose this time to return. Viper, Monkey and Crane came in through the double doors. Shifu, luckily, was nowhere to be seen, and it seemed as though none of my team were with them either. It seemed Crane, at least, had heard the commotion from outside.

"What's going on here?"

"02 thought it would be a good idea to hide the Invisible Trident of Destiny, and now he's shielded himself." Tigress told him. She turned to me, "You realise we're all in a lot of trouble if it isn't found, don't you?"

"I know." I replied, just smiling. "I just want to see what happens."

"Wait a minute," Viper said, "Shifu could be back at any moment now."

It took a while for that announcement to sink in, and when it did, Monkey, Mantis and Po decided to do the only thing that seemed reasonable to them in that situation:

Freak the hell out.

And so, they began screaming and shouting and screeching, with a wide manner of panic reactions from the three:

Mantis, "WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!"

Po, "Noohooooo!"

Monkey, "I never thought I'd die like this."

Mantis, "THIS IS TERRIBLE!"

Po, "Why? WHY?!"

Monkey, "I was so young!"

Mantis, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"

Po, "Naaaahhhahahaaaa... I'm hungry."

Monkey, "You've doomed us all!"

Mantis, "WE'RE DOOMED!"

Po, "We're doooooommeedd-ohhhhh, we're all doomed-aaaahhhghhh*gargle*"

But, yeah, you get the idea. That continued.

Crane, Viper and Tigress had stopped giving me disapproving looks so they could watch the madness, so I let my shield down and made my way over to the double doors. Initiate phase 2.

"Hey guys," I caught their attention, "just kidding, I totally haven't done anything."

"What?" Crane shook his head in disbelief.

"And just saying, you could have just felt around where the Trident should have been. You're all idiots, bye."

I used the stunned silence to make my exit, but it didn't last long.

I could hear the roar building, "02... I'm going to KILL you!"

I began running at full pelt; whatever the Masters had in store for me now, I doubted it was cake. I passed Shifu on his way up the steps.

"Hey Shifu."

"He- wha-?"

The double doors of the Hall of Heroes practically exploded with the force of several angry Kung-Fu Masters, who began charging directly at me.

"Get him!" Po shouted.

"Attack!" Monkey screamed.

"JUSTICE!" Mantis shrieked.

But, yeah. If it wasn't for teleportation, I'd probably be dead, or at least some kind of barely living mush. Apart from almost death/mushification though, overall I'd say:

SHENANIGAN SUCCESSFUL

But, yeah, that's shenanigan the first - I've said before that I didn't want to provoke my own murder, but... yeah, I kind of failed myself in that one, so you can pretty much tell me to do whatever the hell you like. PMs or reviews, whatever's good for you, as long as it's reasonably possible and within my power.

If you're confused about any info to do with me or my team, review, PM me or take a look at my other story - it's the only one other than this, so it shouldn't be too hard to find.

That's pretty much all I have to say, so long for now.

- T02E